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Old 29th Oct 2006, 14:21
  #161 (permalink)  
 
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This happened on the 4th sector of the day returning home from Almeria, Spain as we come to the end of the service.

PAX: Do you have any of the wraps left?
CC: Ill just check.
CC: No, sorry. Just the baguettes left im afraid.
PAX: (looking disgusted) What other food do you have?
CC: Lots of things, Pringles, Soup, Mini Cheddars, Snack Packs...
PAX: Thats not food...
CC: (lost for words) Oh ok, can i get you anything else?
PAX:No.

Why do pax expect you to carry at least one of each sandwich for the whole 600 passengers you are meant to carry on that 4 sector day!? Where do they want us to store them..!
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Old 29th Oct 2006, 22:34
  #162 (permalink)  
 
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First passenger to board: Which one is the white jet??
Me: Um, the white one.
Pax: oh. (pax proceeds through gate)
LOL! - but were you not tempted to reply "The wed one, of couwse!"
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Old 31st Oct 2006, 22:43
  #163 (permalink)  
 
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Two stories that made me chuckle:

Pax boards a BA shorthaul flight at the crack of dawn somewhere in Europe, destined for London.
Pax: "Do you have today’s Daily ....?"
C/C: "Sorry sir, we are unable to offer any of today’s British newspapers until we arrive in London for the first time on these early morning flights. They are then available on the flights we do later on in the day. I do have a copy of yesterdays Daily ..... if you are interested?"
Pax: That is just not good enough - what do I have to do to be able to read today's newspapers on these early morning flights?"
C/C: "Fly with us tomorrow!"


and one to balance, a thick Cabin Crew comment to one of my colleagues....


C/C 1 & 2 come in to the flight deck on a beautiful, clear, moon lit night whilst Mid Atlantic on the way back to London.
C/C 1: "Wow, look at the moon, that's amazing! Which is closer, London or the moon?"
Capt - looks round in astonishment and was just about to open his mouth when C/C 2 chipped in..
C/C 2: Der, can you see London?"

Priceless!
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Old 31st Oct 2006, 23:27
  #164 (permalink)  
 
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I stop boarding & run down to find 30 or so pax strapping in or stowing handbaggage on a longstop a/c parked on the bridge, unpowered & completely dark! They had actually gone through two closed doors to get to the a/c then taken off the safety belt from the door to board.
Classic Risky Shift by the Pax there. Not there fault, it was probably the case that they were given ambiguos advice by a bored, listless soul who assumed that the Pax were just as privvy to the operation as themself.

Just speak slowly and clearly and you should never allow them to have to make a choice when on or around the apron.

XX

Daft of the Datum
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Old 1st Nov 2006, 23:44
  #165 (permalink)  
 
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I wasn't bored or listless dd but thanks for the advice; anyone familiar with gate 25 T1 LHR probably knows what I mean.
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Old 8th Nov 2006, 11:21
  #166 (permalink)  
 
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Talking hot drinks

On a flight from BOM..
Pax;(quietly whispering) do you have any hot drinks ?
Me;would you like to have tea or coffee Sir ? (he he)
Pax;(still whispering quietly), no I want hot drinks, hot hot
Me;(knowing what he wants but..) Certainly Sir, would you like to have tea or coffee, oh or perhaps hot chocolate ? (smiling politely )
Pax(again whispering and speaking extra slowly for me...) I want a hot drink...

Im sure many of you know what the pax was requesting !!!


Pax;I want a whisky on the rocks, without ice

Say no more !!!!


Pax, (on entering plane, holds out boarding card ), 2B
Me; Or not to be Sir !!

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Old 8th Nov 2006, 11:38
  #167 (permalink)  
 
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Sorry, I might be a little on the thick side myself here, but what other "hot" drinks are there??????
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Old 8th Nov 2006, 12:36
  #168 (permalink)  
 
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Was about to ask the same...

Perhaps implying the 'hot' drinks were infact cold?

or has the whole thing gone over my head?
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Old 8th Nov 2006, 12:39
  #169 (permalink)  
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I'm assuming the pax was referring to an alcoholic beverage. This would make sense if the flight was from an airport in one of the Islamic states where alcohol is banned, but as far as I can tell BOM is in India (Mumbai?) where as far as I know alcohol is not prohibited. Maybe this is a case of a slight mistranslation from the native language to English?

Great thread tho, and to all the people who are making such a big deal about people laughing at pax comments, I say quite simply, GET A LIFE! Go find something that's actually worth fighting about!
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Old 8th Nov 2006, 13:21
  #170 (permalink)  
 
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Story from the early 1980's from a Singaporean F/O flying with an expat captain. They are somewhere over the Pacific and have invited a very attractive young lady into the cockpit to look around.
Her: ' Whats that little island down there?'
Long silence. Then the captain pulls a diary out of his pocket, turns to the map of the world and says to the F/O:
'Here you are, your eyes are better than mine, you figure out where we are.'
I hope this is not apocryphal, it was told to me as first hand.
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Old 8th Nov 2006, 14:04
  #171 (permalink)  
 
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Devil hot drinks

Gold star for Matt !!
"hot drinks" is the term used by many people from the Indian Subcontinent to mean alcohol..... usually whisky.

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Old 8th Nov 2006, 14:09
  #172 (permalink)  
 
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In years gone by...

Back in the glorious days of Flight Deck Visits.....

Little boy is taken to visit the F/D inflight....

He looks in amazement then says to the Capt; Wow , Do you know what all these buttons do ?
Capt; (smiles )
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Old 9th Nov 2006, 11:02
  #173 (permalink)  
 
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Story told to my mother who was cabin crew

CC: Would you like a drink

Pax: G+T, thats a gin and tonic to you

CC: would you like ice and a slice, thats frozen water and a bit of lemon to you!
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Old 9th Nov 2006, 11:52
  #174 (permalink)  
 
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Was flying standby with Mrs Fox4 who was crew to HKG (bearing in mind the 11 hrs 45min flight time) and a curious pax asked her "So are you heading straight back to London when we get to Hong Kong?"

Probably not thick so much as innocent but I believe it happens a lot.
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Old 9th Nov 2006, 12:46
  #175 (permalink)  
 
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Originally Posted by TheKabaka
Story told to my mother who was cabin crew

CC: Would you like a drink

Pax: G+T, thats a gin and tonic to you

CC: would you like ice and a slice, thats frozen water and a bit of lemon to you!
this was on Airline. lol
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Old 9th Nov 2006, 19:01
  #176 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by zagloud
Back in the glorious days of Flight Deck Visits.....
Little boy is taken to visit the F/D inflight....
He looks in amazement then says to the Capt; Wow , Do you know what all these buttons do ?
Capt; (smiles )
Hehe, I think that little boy might have been me! (BTW I'm still sure he didn't have a clue what half of them did!)
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Old 10th Nov 2006, 19:21
  #177 (permalink)  
 
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buttons....

lol Matt
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Old 13th Nov 2006, 18:29
  #178 (permalink)  
 
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Going along the same lines, I always get a giggle from pax during boarding when they ask if they can use the toilets. My reply is always the same, “Sir/Madam; please do, as I would rather you did your business in there than on your seat :o). They see the logic.

Alex
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Old 13th Nov 2006, 20:59
  #179 (permalink)  
 
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Originally Posted by Alex-AAE
Going along the same lines, I always get a giggle from pax during boarding when they ask if they can use the toilets. My reply is always the same, “Sir/Madam; please do, as I would rather you did your business in there than on your seat :o). They see the logic.
Alex
Sorry, but I don't think that is a 'thick comment' as the pax might have flown for other airlines that do not allow toilet use on the ground if say for example the aircraft is refuelling.

If they asked and subsequently tried to use the ashtray on the other hand, then that would be thick
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Old 13th Nov 2006, 22:01
  #180 (permalink)  
 
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Originally Posted by Getoutofmygalley
the pax might have flown for other airlines that do not allow toilet use on the ground if say for example the aircraft is refuelling
I think a lot of passengers worry about using the toilet while the aircraft is on the ground, based on the fact that you used not to be allowed to use the toilet on a train when it was in the station.

Well, an aircraft is just an airbourne train/bus isn't it??
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