PDA

View Full Version : Eight legged freaks


Ebbs
28th Apr 2003, 17:09
Aghhhhhh Spider!!!!!!!!! :\

Not to sound like nancy or anything but I just opened my eyes and the sodding thing was perched on the pillow next to me!

I can cope sharing the same planet as them but why oh why must they do this to me?! Pure evil :*

PFLsAgain
28th Apr 2003, 17:18
I was brewing away last weekend and Mr. PFLsAgain was sat in the front room supping some of the previous brewing effort, when I heard a bloodcurdling scream. An evil eight-legged one had got in his beer and he hadn't noticed it until it was wriggling in his mouth! :yuk: :yuk: :yuk:

He spat it out and it crawled off in a bedraggled way. To his credit, he then drank the rest of the beer :ugh: :yuk:

Anthony Carn
28th Apr 2003, 19:01
Quote -- ".....it crawled off in a bedraggled way."

Proably p!ssed, more like it !

Hate spiders. Designed to look frightening before they even move those creepy(?) legs. Yuk ! :ugh:

AerBabe
28th Apr 2003, 21:07
My dad used to make his own wine. He would store it in the spare bedroom, where the heating was turned off to keep it nice and cool. It would still ferment in the bottles a bit, so every morning he'd go and replace corks that had popped out.

Sitting at dinner one day, supping a bottle of his most recent creation, mum was commenting how much sediment it had. When she finished the glass she realised the sediment had 8 legs... :ugh:

Where's VFE? :}

tony draper
28th Apr 2003, 21:21
Well the little buggas been around since the Devonian, 400 million years or so, so they got a head start on us two legged freaks, and in all probability they will outlive us.
Incidently Aerbabe, Crabs and lobsters are exactly the same familiy as Spiders and Scorpians and most folk are quite happy to eat those critters,and roast Tarantula is a delicacy in the South American rain forrest.
:rolleyes:

PS, I hate the little feckers as well, just playing devils advocate here. :uhoh:

AerBabe
28th Apr 2003, 21:31
Just to be pedantic... they don't belong to the same Family, but they do belong to the same Order - Araneae. :O

Tinstaafl
28th Apr 2003, 21:33
Only itty bitty ones in the UK. I let them have free run around home.

Dozza2k
28th Apr 2003, 21:38
I had no probs with the little things here in the Uk until one holiday 2 years ago when i was wandering around a zoo or something similar in Northern Queensland when i rounded a corner ahead of my parents and stopped just in time before i walked smack into a web the size of my head multiplyed by two. Plumb in the middle was a very large eight legged freak who i could swear was watching me!.


aaaaaaahh memories.

tony draper
28th Apr 2003, 21:45
I got a Trilobite Aerbabe, its dead now though. :(

fourthreethree
28th Apr 2003, 21:55
Apparantly the average human eats (yes, thats eats ) eight spiders during his/her life while sleeping.:\
I guess you could count that as a lucky escape Ebbs!!;)

compressor stall
28th Apr 2003, 22:02
A few months ago I spent a couple of crystal clear nights on the back of the harvester plying our way along the rows of some of Australia's finest vineyards.

My job was to fish out spiders and lizards and any other little critters that made their way through the wirring bits of machinery into the square vat.

Every year a snake or two finds its way in there as well. :eek:

BUT...we are one of the few vinyards that have people pulling this stuff out...most dont bother!

And that goes for wine from all regions of the world

DX Wombat
28th Apr 2003, 22:28
Stallie That lends a whole new meaning to the description "Full-bodied" :uhoh: :\

Anthony Carn
28th Apr 2003, 23:53
When she finished the glass she realised the sediment had 8 legs...
Funny that - you'd have thought it'd be legless by then.

:O

Ebbs
28th Apr 2003, 23:54
fourthreethree Do they usually travel in pairs?!:ooh: I'm not sure it could have tasted much worse than the donner pizza I munched last night though :yuk:

T_richard
28th Apr 2003, 23:58
I knew there was a reason I didn't like to drink wine. The stupid spiders in it give me a headache the next day. Yeah thats it, it can't be that I drank too much vino, it's the spiders fault

EI_Sparks
29th Apr 2003, 00:07
Ebbs,
Get a cat and let it sleep in the room with you. Cats seem to think of spiders as a cross between a mars bar and a nintendo :)
And if you move to australia, get a cougar - their spiders are trying to take the country back apparently :D
bloody arachnids. don't mind them when I'm awake, but my snoozetime is sacrosant, and you'd think the snoring would scare 'em off too

rainbow
29th Apr 2003, 00:34
Hmmm, I note that some of our contributors here have had the odd contact with spiders. Few have had fatal encounters with our arachnid friends.

Indeed, should any of us read newspapers tomorrow, or any day, chances are that we will encounter more reports of road fatalities (or murder, suicide, misadventure, space shuttle etc.) than we will of deaths caused by spiders.

Yet, chances are that in the same newspapers there will be few reports of diseases avoided because of arachnid intervention: Which must number in the millions when one only considers malarial mosquitos consumed by our eight legged friends. (Other pests inhabiting crop and pasture land share pretty much the same story.)

Perhaps it's time for a 'Charlott's Web' re-reading.

To declare an interest, I should state that I encourage spiders to co-habitate with our domicile here. None of three kids have been bitten, nor do any have malaria.

:)

EI_Sparks
29th Apr 2003, 00:39
It's not that I'd go round mashing them up rainbow, I just tend to be particular about how many eyes I wake up looking into ;)
And eight is waaaaay too many :)

rainbow
29th Apr 2003, 00:44
Can't argue with logic like that, EI Sparks!!;)

(Best edit my previous.. how did that happen??:confused: )

Anthony Carn
29th Apr 2003, 01:09
Waking up to eight eyes is OK !

As long as they belong to four young dolly birds. :E

EI_Sparks
29th Apr 2003, 01:56
Anthony, if you did find yourself in bed with four young ladies, I think that would be more in the line of the "how do you want to go out" thread than anything else ;) :D :ok:

Synthetic
29th Apr 2003, 02:14
Not to bothered about them one way or the other up to the point when they become life threatening, but there is a curiosity about them.

I fly model airplanes. At certain times, usually during the autumn, the plane will be clear when it takes off, but when it lands, it will be covered in web and small spiders.

Anyone explain that?:confused:

PaperTiger
29th Apr 2003, 02:42
Apparantly the average human eats (yes, thats eats ) eight spiders during his/her life while sleeping. Yeah, sure. http://www.snopes.com/science/stats/spiders.htm

Interested in some Florida real estate, or a bridge in New York by any chance ? ;)

Ebbs
29th Apr 2003, 03:41
Haha, I'm Ebbs' Flat Mate Dave, and I know why your plane gets covered in mini spiders...
When (some) little spiders hatch out of the nest they've come from, they spin out a little gossamer parachute type-thingee which is then caught by the winds and enable them to float for miles and miles high in the sky. This is so they can maximise the area they inhabit and so they don't encroach on each others territory and miss out on food and the like...
PS I've wanted a Tarantula as a pet since I was about 6, so I'm on the side of the freaks...

AerBabe
29th Apr 2003, 04:38
rainbow some of our contributors here have had the odd contact with spiders. Few have had fatal encounters
Yes... funny that. Anyone posting from beyond the grave? Come on, admit it....

pax anglia
29th Apr 2003, 04:54
I post this not as a criticism but solely out of curiousity.
I keep my old horse at a farm down the road and this morning had to remove two middling size spiders from the tack room for a female friend. I try to square the fact that she hates the things, with the equally solid fact that she is quite content to deal at close quarters with her horse (pushing 17hands and weighing well over half a ton). Which is capable of doing the greater damage? This is not an isolated example as many of the fair sex that have horses are - to put it bluntly - terrified of spiders.
Is there anyone who could shed some light on this paradox for me please?

Synthetic
29th Apr 2003, 05:12
Well I'll be---

Thanks for that Dave. Nice plan spiders right up to the point right up to the point where you tangle with 5lbs of screaming Wot4. Anyone know what VNE on these little chaps is?

As to the point of being afraid of them - my sister is well 'ard. She is Bill and has spent most of her life sorting out villains in some of the worse areas of London, yet I can remember the day that she and her cronies at school decided to become scared of spiders. A policy she still maintains:\

tony draper
29th Apr 2003, 05:25
Jeezus wept 17 hands? horse webs must take some shifting. ;)

Blacksheep
29th Apr 2003, 13:32
They use horse webs on army assault courses, drapes. ;)

Our resident 4 inch hairy spider, 'Big Annie', has finally disappeared. I think the neighbours little girl frightened it away. Either that or she ate it. Eat anything those creepy crawly little critters do; everything goes straight in their mouths. (Babies that is!) :(

**************************
Through difficulties to the cinema

arcniz
29th Apr 2003, 14:57
Arachnida! Tho normally smaller than a horse (fixate on the fullsize option sometime when you want to have a really hard night) they can pack a punch. One of the bred-in chemical skills of the spider gang is the means to make spit that is an anti-coagulent, anaesthetic, +/- irritant, +/-toxin, +/- antibiotic for the benefit of us other critters in the swamp.

The all-purpose survival guide, p. 413, says to use spider-web as bandage for the incidental scratches, should your Airbus effortlessly auto-crashland in the Amazon jungle.

Chances are, your pillow, your roses, and probably your eyebrows have a thriving population of spider kin, a mite smaller than your basic tarantula.

Back when, my then-young sweetie appeared one morning with a little white spot on her forefinger, saying it hurt a bit. No clear infection, just a hollowed out spot. Peroxide and comforting words. Next day she war in the hospital, turning pinker by the hour from a compounding 'septicemia' which was real cause for worry. After a couple of days in active care, the surgeons still had no idea what was wrong, but wanted to "fillet" her to see if they could find out. I protested and held ground long enough that she got past it and recovered on her own. Days later they grudgingly let her go, unfilleted. Only lingering effect is that she runs quite rough after 9pm, a fairly effective method of birth control. Thanks to above for small favors. My bet is/was spider bite.

In a certain hot and humid valley flanking slopes that tower over Diamond Head, one can find distinctive half-inch spiders, living in trees over a stream at maybe 600' msl amid rotting strawberry guava and rampant wild ti, which resemble sea crabs in elaborate detail, right down to the emphatic pincers and characteristic oval crab symmetry of our tasty ocean friends. Try a plunge into the chasm just NW of Kaimuki, but dunna slip on the guava..

Robbie Bruce is supposed to have found new sense of purpose as he sojurned on the Hebrides in the winter of 1306. Inspired by a spideer twelve times trying to web and succeeding on the thirteenth, so it is said, he went back to Ayrshire to take over the Scots Kingdom & steer 'em right. Right.

In my countryside kitchen cabinet where flour and similar things are stored, a dynasty of distinctively poisonous redback-style spiders has taken root and still holds sway into their 3rd decade of hegemony. They live well from the moths which come out of the inevitable flour weevils. For our part, fewer moths is good. Nobody yet has expressed a strong desire to personally remove the spiders from their handy squatting place. They are our eight-legged cats.

The vineyard spiders I know are mostly white ones - very mild mannered. Local custom is to let the picked bins of grape sit some hours in shade to allow the bunch critters some time to crawl out. They seem to appreciate this and exit in droves.

flyblue
29th Apr 2003, 16:00
I've had a number of close encounters with spiders while on layovers. The creepiest has been the one in Dominican Rep, when a HUGE spider turned out to be a mum-spider and let go at least 200 baby-spiders that were napping on her body when we sprayed it with insecticide :ooh:
Funniest was in the Maldives. Crew members each got a bungalow which bathroom was under the stars, meaning no ceiling. Which of course was wonderful and romantic if you are in honeymoon and wish to have a shower and contemplate the palms and the stars at the same time. But I was not that glad to contemplate the mother of all spiders on the wall when I got in one night after dinner. BIG and hairy, and I guess sociable too because he started JUMPING my way when I opened the door. Being the coldest blooded girl in civil aviation, I slammed the door, screamed and set a record reaching the bungalow nextdoor in less than 2 seconds. Despite the late hour, I knocked on the door begging Capt to come and get rid of the monster. I suppose he wondered for a while if he was being asked out in the weirdest way ever, but then he understood something whas really wrong from the tone of my voice. Told me "putting my pants on" and was out with a John Wayne look in his eyes.
The rest of the story is very similar to that Woody Allen scene in "Annie Hall", with the Capt first entering the bathroom and getting out in the same second. Second round, I heard funny noises that made me wonder if he was trying to persuade the creepy thing to bug off. I yelled -"DID YOU KILL IT???" . -"Trying!" Then it was thumping noises, growling and swish-swish around. Finally he emerged sweaty and pale from the battlefield announcing that he had killed it. -"What did you do with the -yuk- body?-. -"threw it outside".
Thanked him and went to bed...to wake up in the morning with spidey crawling up the wall!!! I'll spare you the fierce battle during which I threw at the thing anything I could get hold of, while he bounced towards me in that agressive spidery way of his. Finally a uniform shoe seemed to win over him, and I ran out of the room and got help to remove the body from my view (they just swept it out of my bungalow door, so I had the sight of it for the rest of the week).
Cornered the Capt at breakfast, and he eventually admitted he had "put it to flight" and that it had crawled over the wall, but with its own 8 legs. Men! :rolleyes:

Blacksheep, my mum had a resident spider too, whom she called Hugo, but it lasted so long that I think it died in its eighties spider-years :p

Blacksheep
29th Apr 2003, 21:02
I was quite fond of Big Annie. She was a 'Huntsman' about 4 inches across that lived under the sofa and only came out when no-one was around. (I'm quiet and inoffensive so she didn't worry about me) She ate Gekkos and kept the place clean. Now the living room is infested once more and I'll have to get the old air rifle out again.

**************************
Through difficulties to the cinema

flyblue
30th Apr 2003, 04:51
She ate Gekkos :ooh: :eek: !!!

JustaFew
30th Apr 2003, 06:49
I thought this was going to be about a new bovine discovery near a nuclear power station.

Oh well...:hmm:

Hostie from Hell
30th Apr 2003, 07:42
Tonight we were at our local and a friend was telling me about a HUGE spider she saw at home last night, she is not usually scared of them but due to the size of it, she even panicked! A few minutes later still shivering over the spider stories I visited the loos.

Bleedin heck but when I went to close the door in there, what jumped down....... a SPIDER bbrrrrr:uhoh:

He now lives on the soles of my shoes



sorry spider lovers:{

PeterThePilot
30th Apr 2003, 08:22
"he started JUMPING my way" :{ :{

I hope if something like that ever happened to me that I would be wearing my brown trousers :} :}

Luca_brasi
30th Apr 2003, 13:55
Anyone else read Funnelweb by Richard Ryan?? Don't know if it was released outside Australia but after reading it you get very scared of any little spider. Very freaky.

flyblue
30th Apr 2003, 14:38
I have another one! I have another one!

This one happened to my sister, in the Dominican Republic. She was with her crew at a local restaurant. One of the guys spotted a HUGE spider (15 cm at least :ooh: ) in a bush near their table. They called the owner and asked if it was a kind who bite. The answer, who became a classic, was:

-No, no te pica! Si te pica te mata, pero no te pica!"
Translation:
-"No, it's not going to bite you! If he bites you you're dead, but it ain't going to bite you!"