View Full Version : Haggis !!!!!!!!

Fox Fire
27th Oct 2002, 14:59
ATCbabe is wreaking revenge on sprout eaters by making them eat god awful scottish concoctions :rolleyes:

Picture the scene in a nice little restaurant at Loch Ness lunchtime on Friday; one hapless Australian tourist, evil ATCO of the female persuasion, and one very proud scottish waiter in cahoots with said ATCO.

'You have to try haggis', the cry went up from ATCbabe and echoed by the waiter. Obviously my reply was 'you have to be bloody kidding'; and anyway I'd ordered a nice steak. The 2 indigenous creatures then proceeded to work together to try to change my mind. Needless to say I resisted the 10 minutes of nagging and stuck to wanting the nice steak. ATCbabe and waiter decided to give up and pout instead.

Our meal arrives and what do I spy on the ruddy plate but a ramekin of HAGGIS!!!!!!! They had conspired together to get me to try the revolting looking (and sounding) stuff :rolleyes: Half a steak later I gave in to the incessant nagging and pouting (and that was just the waiter :eek: ) and tried a bit of the evil looking so-called 'delicacy'. Now I am adventurous when it comes to food but plueeeeeeeeze Blaaaaahhh awful bloody stuff.

Can I have my way and ban the Haggis from the planet?

Love it or loath it? Whats the verdict?

Hagbard the Amateur
27th Oct 2002, 15:06
I love it.

Earlier this year I even ordered one and a half kilos of Grant's tinned haggis over the Net because in Switzerland it is impossible to get the fresh stuff posted. I know the haggis purists out there will call me a philistine but beggars can't be choosers. We had it served with mashed potato and carrots, whisky on the side. For the purists, I don't like neeps, hence the carrots.


:) :) :)

27th Oct 2002, 15:09
Haggis rules

you can't beat it


(although tinned haggis does sounds a bit dubious)

27th Oct 2002, 15:12
Wonderful stuff. Especially with athol brose to follow ;) mmmmmmmmmmmm
Can anyone recommend a supplier of haggis to a Midlander? :)

27th Oct 2002, 15:42
Love it FOX,

babe, phil and I need to take u Haggis Hunting before you go,

tastes even better fresh one :)

27th Oct 2002, 16:12
Has to be free range, or wild.
The factory farmed ones are cruel. Llocked up in dark sheds on the level, rather than running free round the tops of hills.

27th Oct 2002, 16:35

Much to his dad and mum's dismay
Horace ate himself one day
He didn't stop to say his grace
He just sat down and ate his face
"We can't have this!" his dad declared
"If that lad's ate he should be shared"
But even as he spoke they saw
Horace eating more and more:
First his legs and then his thighs,
His arms, his nose, his hair, his eyes
"Stop him someone!" Mother cried
"Those eyeballs would be better fried!"
But all too late for they were gone,
And he had started on his dong...
"Oh foolish child!" the father mourned
"You could have deep-fried those with prawns,
Some parsley and some tartar sauce..."
But H was on his second course;
His liver and his lights and lung,
His ears, his neck, his chin, his tongue
"To think I raised him from the cot
And now he's gone to scoff the lot!"
His mother cried what shall we do?
What's left won't even make a stew..."
And as she wept her son was seen
To eat his head his heart his spleen
And there he lay, a boy no more
Just a stomach on the floor...
None the less since it was his
They ate it - and that's what haggis is



tony draper
27th Oct 2002, 16:42
time to worry FF is when Babe tells you to paint yer face blue, you don't want to know what yer gorra do next. :eek:

Good poem AAA. ;)

27th Oct 2002, 16:57
I love it :D

In fact I'm having haggis for supper tonight :D

27th Oct 2002, 18:25

Take one tin of Grants Haggis
Open both ends and push it out whole.
Open up your turkey's legs and stuff it mightily with the Haggis
Cook turkey normally.

Apart from having your traditional turkey you also have the most wonderful stuffing you could imagine.

Only 59 more days to go, I can hardly wait :D :D :D

27th Oct 2002, 19:31
Oh oh...... I'm in trouble!!!!:(

Just admitted to Foxy that I have never eaten haggis in my life and she aint a happy lil Ozzie petunia:( :(

I used the "I'm Scottish therefore its my birthright to be exempt" clause but she didnt fall for that one.

Jon guess we will have to take her haggis hunting to let her forgive me, but she just wont believe that two of their legs are shorter so they dont fall off the mountains!! Dunno why she doesn't believe me :confused:

Tony she will get a blue face standing out in the cold when she goes haggis hunting anyway, takes time to trap the lil buggas!!!!;)

27th Oct 2002, 19:45
Doesn't a Haggis only have one Wing so it only flys around in a Circle?

How do you actually hun Haggis? I've heard of people doing it, but never seen it done?



27th Oct 2002, 19:52
OK so I am also a celiac which means that the wee haggis should never form part of my diet (eating gluten-full stuff as a celiac runs direct risk of bowel cancer!) BUT ... just once a year, at Hogmanay, I have to partake of the wee cowerin beastie's cousin THE HAGGIS!!

I also loved black puddin before the medics diagnosed me condition ... but I just risk my life once a year for the blessed Haggis!!!!!!!!!

'tis a wondrous dish and... thanks to sirwa69 I now have a neat solution to my wanting to taste just a mouthful... the Haggis will be the stuffing for my Christmas turkey this year!!


tony draper
27th Oct 2002, 20:06
I understand you can get liquid haggis now and them jocks are injecting it directly into a vein. ;)

Anthony Carn
28th Oct 2002, 11:03
Horrible, sticky, greasy taste.

A traditional ingredient is sheep's lungs, I understand. All the gloop is encased in a stomach ! Yum ! :eek:

Who has control?
28th Oct 2002, 11:11
Haggis - doesn't that use all the bits left over after the Americans have had tall he steaks and the Brits have had the kidneys & liver?

Its just a very bad sausage.

Haggis and sprouts anyone??

28th Oct 2002, 12:05
Very fond of decent haggis, I am. Best place to get a good one in London is Smithfield market - the present favourite is McSween's. Quite peppery and absolutely not greasy or slimy at all.

Athol brose - oh what a treat that is! Was describing it to Reddo and Checkboard on Saturday night.

28th Oct 2002, 12:10
I love haggis!! Nothing better than a big plate of Haggis, tatties and neeps on a cold night to warm you up (along with a decent dram of course).
Current fave one is made by Gronbach in Fife (and if anyones interested they do export!).

28th Oct 2002, 12:58
Who has Control:

Are you suggesting that the Scots aren't British?

Haggis is delightful, spicy and satisfying and if done properly is not at all greasy. A sausage it isn't. It is in a culinary league of its own when compared to tripe and onions or faggots.

28th Oct 2002, 14:38
Despite not being of any Scottish family tree, I really,really,really love haggis!
Grant's tinned haggis is all I am reduced to as I not longer live anywher near a loch or close. This is sad but better than nothing.

AS for how one hunts a haggis? :cool:
I have been explained the following.
As the haggis is a hill roaming beastie it has, for greater efficiency, one leg shorter than the other. It so runs upright through the heather along the slopes of the Scottish hills.
At haggis catching time one needs to creep close up IN FRONT OF a flock of the beasties and at the right moment holler:"Get yerself the f**k oot off here, Jimmy!"
Starteled the haggi will turn around and attempt to run away.
BUT...........having one leg shorter than the other makes them lose balance. Afew well placed catches will have bagged several beasties before they realised they were conned again.

This is also the reason why you will not find shot in the dismemebered bodies found hanging in your local game butchers shop.
:D :D :D

28th Oct 2002, 14:58

that is one way to catch haggi (plural?????). The fact that 2 legs are shorter (on the same side) helps it run on the rugged hills of Scottyland, but it is in fact its weakness!!

A well known haggi capture method is to set up a net on the hillside. Then you chase all the haggi around the hill. As they only go one way round the hill (due to their short legs) they eventually run into the forementioned net trapping them.

Another way is to place nets at the bottom of the hill, then chase the haggi in the wrong direction, ie their short legs on the outside. This way they lose their balance and tumble down the hill into the nets!!

Either way they are kind of thickle really!!!:(

But just make sure its haggis hunting season. The penalties for hunting out of season are horrific!!! I heard the last man caught is still screaming at the sight/mention of haggis :eek: :eek:

28th Oct 2002, 16:35
I like Haggis. Had some at The Drover's Inn on the A82 at Inverannan. It was cooked by an Australian. :D
My favourite UK pub. :D

28th Oct 2002, 16:44

Have you tried your local Sainsbury's ?
My local store down here in London often has a good stock of haggis.

I'm on the understanding that since the scares of listeria and foot & mouth over the recent years, it is pretty much impossible to obtain a traditional haggis (ie with sheep's lung and encased in a sheep's stomach)

Anthony Carn
28th Oct 2002, 16:49
Leg(s) one side longer than the other ????? Limp explanation ?

Pull the other one -- too hard to swallow !

:D :D :D

28th Oct 2002, 17:55
Despite living in a clime which is a million miles away from that of ma ain hame! We still get regular supplys of good haggis due to the fact that the local branch of Tesco's (Jawads) is managed by a Scotsman (good lad Paul) :D


I hate to tell you this but in a cunning plan to reintigrate the Geordies to the one true blood, Scottish and Newcastle Brewers have been lacing Newkie Brown with liquid haggis for years now.
That's why I love it :eek: :eek:

28th Oct 2002, 18:19
Have you tried your local Sainsbury's ?
My local store down here in London often has a good stock of haggis.

DJK haggis should be caught with your own hands, its the way of the world in Scotland :)

28th Oct 2002, 18:33
The only place to buy good Haggis is McSweens in Edinburgh.

It is of course made of the sweepings from the abatoir floor at the end of the day shoved in a plastic bag with a load of spices thrown in.

Quite tasty though !! :D

28th Oct 2002, 21:01
MacSweens haggis is available at COSTCO branches nationwide. Nice n spicy!
Gronbachs is the best though. Cowdenbeath High Street. Only good thing to come out of Cowdenbeath....apart from Mrs C!
If you're there go to Gina's at the bottom end of town on the way to Mossmorran and get a haggis supper and a bottle of Irn Bru! There's usually some entertainment too, Gina is a bit of a character.:)

28th Oct 2002, 21:38

Babes not had a haggis :o


tony draper
28th Oct 2002, 21:42
So what, I've never had a sheep,,,,,,, yet :rolleyes:

28th Oct 2002, 22:23
define had :o

29th Oct 2002, 07:19
Never had haggis - never hopes to either.

The thought of what it consists of :o

Do the RSPCA know about the hunting of them ??

29th Oct 2002, 08:39
Shouldn't that be the RSPCH? ;)

And no, DJK, none of the local shops I've tried so far sell them :(

29th Oct 2002, 09:46
In case anyone is having trouble getting hold of haggis locally, Gronbachs do an overnight mail service for theirs! They can be contacted on 01383 510906 or at 200 High Street, Cowdenbeath. It really is one of the better ones on the market, i can highly recommend it. And before you ask, no i dont work for them!:)

29th Oct 2002, 14:55
Correction Aerbabe,


Scottish .....

tony draper
29th Oct 2002, 15:01
I found a tinned haggis in the back of my cupboard a while ago, god knows how long it had been there, but it said on the label, AS SUPPLIED TO CAPTIN SCOTTS ARCTIC EXPEDITIONS, good luck at the pole. ;)

Capt Homesick
29th Oct 2002, 18:54
You see Tony? If he'd eaten it he'd have made it back for more!

29th Oct 2002, 21:20
I have eaten haggis.

I have also travelled with Mrs Reynolds to her indigenous environment near the Thai/Laos border, and witnessed the collection, execution, preparation, cooking (sometimes) and consumption of the fauna of the indigenous environment.

I can categorically state and affirm that there are far worse things than haggis out there.....

Uncle Cracker
29th Oct 2002, 23:25
Haggis 'n' clapshot wi' pepper. Hurrah!

30th Oct 2002, 03:51
Mmm, sheep's offal stuffed into a sheep's stomach? I'm an inside -out Haggis then, it seems.

so you never had a sheep, draper? i've had lots of 'em - you don't know what you're missing! :D

Through difficulties to the cinema

30th Oct 2002, 08:02
(Relieved to find Foxy still alive after comsuming haggis!:D )

The hunting of wild haggis is a little-kown aspect of the hunter's craft.

First, the lifestyle and ecology of the haggis has to be studied minutely for they are inherently shy creatures, rarely showing themselves unless at twilight on moonless nights. Occasionally the young (and foolish) first-season haggis may be seen during daylight. Those that survive soon learn the error of their ways. These survive to form the next breeding generation.

After the hunter is familiar with the habitat and ecology of the haggis, the correct haggis-hunting kit has to be obtained. Most highland gentlemen's outfitters can equip the would-be haggis hunter if one asks discretely and has the appropriate amount of money.

The weapons traditionally used for hunting comprise the "Knurdle", a three-foot long gnarly stick, roughly tapered, fitted with a leather thong which passes around the wrist, and the traditional dirk or dagger, varying from utilitarian models sourced from overseas factories to the ornately decorated hand-made models from highland craftsmen. These are often inlaid with silver and gold and come in a presentation scabbard with a dedication to the owner. These become heirlooms among highland families and are exceptionally highly valued. "Outsiders" will rarely see such valuable instruments, however.

Haggis hunting is an essentially solitary occupation. The hunter makes his way to the haggis grounds, high amongst the heather-clad hills, preferably before dawn or just before dusk. Taking a vantage point he observes the likely areas where haggis might appear. Binoculars may be used although image-intensifying night-vision devices are regarded as unsporting and fit to be used only by American tourists.

Once a haggis is spied out, the hunter quietly stalks the creature, making sure to remain downwind for the haggis has an acute sense of smell although the eyesight is poor, on a par with that of the rhinoceros.

The haggis, when startled, is capable of surprising speeds over a short distance but tires rapidly after this initial burst of energy is dissipated. The hunter must maintain visual contact at all times for the haggis is also a master of camouflage and can hide very effectively amidst gorse bushes and heather clumps if the hunter loses sight for a few seconds.

Running the haggis down may take several bursts of pursuit but the hunter should end up being placed in a position to strike at the haggis. If using the Knurdle, the hunter swings it around the wrist and brings it smartly down on the haggis, aiming to hit a single blow just above the probic vent area. Properly struck this stuns the haggis which can then be despatched with a thrust of the dirk. A second blow may be struck if the first is misplaced but any more than two blows with the Knurdle is considered bad sportsmanship by purists.

Allowing the haggis to hang for a period removes the excessively "gamey" taste that a prolonged pursuit may cause in the flesh. Taste and texture vary according to age and habitat-related factors. There are no known parasites that infest haggis, and the animal is also resistant to foot-and-mouth disease as well as BSE.

The bag-limit caries from area to area, depending on infestation-rates and seasonal conditions. True haggis-hunters take only what they can eat, leaving sufficient breeding-stock to ensure a continuing population.

Haggis very rarely breed in captivity. In fact, they take captivity very badly, seeming to become motionless to the point where they can be easily tinned and sold as delicacies. Haggis-farming using genetically-modified haggis clones produces a very inferior product, immediately rejected by connoisseurs. No reputable restaurant will serve it.


30th Oct 2002, 11:46
Haven't tried the Cowdenbeath variety, but I always swear by MacSweens - regular haggis champs.

The good news, aerbabe i shtat they deliver all over the country (being in Suffolk, I know of two butchers in Bury St Edmunds that stock them). You can find out where they supply near you by writing or calling:

MacSweens of Edinburgh
Dryden Road Bilston Glen
EH20 9LZ

Phone: 0131 440 2555
Fax: 0131 440 2674

And don't forget - St Andrews night in a few weeks!

Oh, and aerbabe - if you need a hand cooking or consuming it - let me know ;)

:D :D :D

Celtic Emerald
30th Oct 2002, 13:26
Ah the Tasmanian divil has started a thread ;)

How are you enjoying Scotland, I'll be heading up there next week & I intend to stuff my face with haggis (minus tatties & neeps), I luv it as long as it's not tinned. :mad: It's not unlike Irish white pudding, but for folks like yourself from far flung places it may be more of an acquired place.

I'm sure many of you'se have read the story about me giving the tinned haggis to the captain who allowed me jumpseat from Prestwick, a nightmare gift if there ever was one. I stuck to safer pressies after that, I don't want to literally kill them with kindness. :eek: