How seven words might affect a career!

[Nil_Drift]

32 (The Royal) Sqn has experienced a lot of pain in recent years with uncertainty around aircraft contract extensions, particularly with the A109S helicopter contract.

Flt Cdr Ops, Sqn Ldr Tom Woods, mistakenly called the boss of 32 Sqn by the Daily Mail, wrote seven words which has brought the spotlight of No 10 swinging in his direction to illuminate his Station magazine article, "at the request of the Prime Minister".

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-12876967/Row-Rishi-choppers-No10-denies-Sunak-intervened-personally-save-RAF-VIP-helicopters.html

As a former editor of the Brize Norton Gateway magazine, I know the politics and pitfalls of writing articles for the interest of station personnel. Perhaps the editor of this magazine should have tuned their political antennae before going to press?

What memories do PPRuNe members have about things going to print which probably should have been edited out?

[skua]

The Daily Fail were just picking up on a story broken by the Sunday Times yesterday. An incredibly badly written piece that called Woods a "soldier", amongst other basic errors.
But agree Woods must be feeling rotten today.


https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/rishi-sunak-intervened-to-keep-his-vip-helicopter-rides-230mbrpb9

[MG]

Sometime around the start of the 1990s, one of the sqns at Brüggen bribed the stn photographers to get hold of a photo. The Brüggen Circuit magazine thus featured said photo of one of the rival sqn’s flt cdr with his blue shirt and tie, looking very serious for his security photo, but with his flying suit around his ankles.
the stn cdr didn’t appreciate the image, especially as the magazine was distributed around the local villages.

[Chugalug2]

Political antennas notwithstanding, do we know if Sqn Ldr Woods statement is true or not? Why would he have written it if it were not true to the best of his knowledge? Wouldn't he have checked with the CoC beforehand? Command or Group? If you are told to carry the can these days for others faults think twice before doing so. The truth eventually comes out anyway, usually a lot sooner these days thanks to the internet, and your self sacrifice made worthless. Ironic if it is true but denied by number 10, given the example of demands for the expulsion of Baroness Mone from the HoL for lying to the press.

[Bob Viking]

In 2007 (give or take a year or two) the editor of the RAF Coningsby Station magazine (a current FJ Sqn Boss who shall remain nameless) didn’t quite manage complete, due diligence during the editorial process.

A photograph of a group of pilots in flying suits was published and nobody noticed the ‘twig and giggleberries’ of one of the pilots was protruding (deliberately) from his zip.

It was eventually noticed and all copies were recalled (including from CAS’ outer office). The editor then spent many happy hours with a thick (or maybe thin), black marker pen redacting the offending appendage before recirculating the publications.

BV

[Ninthace]

The words that nearly had a drastic effect on my career:
” Tell me sir, what do you want to be if you grow up”.
Possibly not the wisest thing to say to one’s first RO whilst still an officer under training.

[Nil_Drift]

Although it didn't appear in the station magazine, so it didn't go off station, Station Routine Orders was the next best thing.

At TTTE Cottesmore in the early eighties, RAFP Cpl dog handlers knew all the Linies but, probably through sheer boredom or being in possession of genuine "goldfish" memories, would stop guys heading to shift handover and demand to see their F1250 [now MOD F90 - ID cards to those who know neither]. It was the custom for some to crouch down and show the ID to the "brain on the chain".

OC Plod issued a strongly worded SRO entry: "When stn personnel are requested to show their F1250, they are to present it to the RAFP and not to the dog".

Guess what the common practice became thereafter? :)

[NutLoose]

When the RAF got their new Chinooks they were rightly proud of them and wished to use an image of a chinook in flight on the CIO posters etc, so two helicopters were despatched, images taken and posters produced and delivered to the OCU for perusal.

Now on the OCU we had three Marks amongst the engineers, so naturally we used to refer to them as Mk 1, Mk 2 and Mk 3, like you do.

Anyway we were all looking at the new posters when a voice chirped up, “hey look it has Mark 3 written in the exhaust staining” clear as a bell, needless to say there was a lot of How did that get there etc and Mark 3 who was an engine tradesman denied all knowledge of doing it.

They had to bin all the posters produced and start again I believe:E

[Stitchbitch]

In 2007 (give or take a year or two) the editor of the RAF Coningsby Station magazine (a current FJ Sqn Boss who shall remain nameless) didn’t quite manage complete, due diligence during the editorial process.

A photograph of a group of pilots in flying suits was published and nobody noticed the ‘twig and giggleberries’ of one of the pilots was protruding (deliberately) from his zip.

It was eventually noticed and all copies were recalled (including from CAS’ outer office). The editor then spent many happy hours with a thick (or maybe thin), black marker pen redacting the offending appendage before recirculating the publications.

BV

As (legend has it) did the offender 🤣.

[Specaircrew]

Back in the 80's I did a stint as the editor of Westwings (St Mawgan). I'm surprised that the Boss gave me the job as I'd been renowned for using harsh banter against the Blunties in my Sqn articles! As I peruse a few old copies of the magazine I can see now that I failed miserably to filter out all the 'abhorrent' content that would cause 'Gen Wet' to 'Struggle with their mental health' these days ;-) Of course, in the days before smartphones with cameras, I had to be meticulous in the vetting of any photos taken on Det!!

[Rigga]

Not published - but 7 words none the less.
On arrival at a helicopter station somewhere in germany. I had to have a little chat with my new Flt Sgt who asked “Do you play football?” To which I replied “Its a P@@fs game, I prefer Rugby” and the Flt Sgt then reveals that he is the Station Footy Manager…..Oops!

[Ninthace]

I believe when the Tornados started to move into Bruggen the local Dutch paper published an interview with a driver(airframe) in which he said it was quieter than the Jaguar, What he did make clear was that was from the seat in the front, not from the suburbs of Roermond.

[BEagle]

This Will Look Really Good On Camera!

[pr00ne]

“Come on! No one will ever know…”

[Ninthace]

Just hold my beer and watch this,

[Gordomac]

Can't quite manage 7(always had that problem but here's 6) ; "What does your Mum call you ?". Answer would invariably be something like "Cuddles" to which Chopper would continue; "Well, Cuddles, you failed."

Oh, managed 7. Chopper to fool who thought he was under training ;" Well, I think we'll stop you there."

[Mogwi]

In answer to the US display director’s question as to whether the scoushy cloudbase was fit for my jumping bean display - after a B-1 had nearly crashed crowd centre:

“I’ll get airborne and give it a shot”

Didn't realise that the R/T was being broadcast over the PA system! Luckily, all went well and I was presented with the CO’s hat and promoted to the VIP suite.

Mog

[Herod]

"Trust me; I'm an officer. No, really" Other occupations are available.:ok:

[langleybaston]

Seasonal.

Its called sabrage.
Hold the bottle still.

[NutLoose]

Salisbury plain, setting up the camp, and determining where to put the OP.

Pilot in charge “we will put it there”, everyone looks bewildered as it is clearly in the wrong place, then comes the immortal words from same mouth, “trust me, I have a degree in Geography”.

RAF Regt officer turns up later to survey the site and asks “Which fecking idiot decided to put the OP there”

All hands rapidly point at the said pilot.

[NutLoose]

Heading to Gut to do an engine change, hammering the Sherpa up the autobahn at warp speed we come across a lonely black military car cruising along quite serenly, seeing it the Corporal driving starts slowing down, I says “it’s probably just some SAC MT driver out on a run”

A nodding of heads and warp speed rengaged.. we get a bit lost but arriving at Gut we get an unexpected “ Ahh we have been expecting you, wait here, OC ( possibly ops ) would like a word with whoever is in charge?”

Both myself and the driver look at each other, then turn around and point at our Sgt who has slept all the way and say “ He is”

Waking him up we inform him his presence is required and we both watch as he gets a bollocking outside the guardroom, climbing back in he utters “Cheers guys”

[langleybaston]

Heading to Gut to do an engine change, hammering the Sherpa up the autobahn at warp speed we come across a lonely black military car cruising along quite serenly, seeing it the Corporal driving starts slowing down, I says “it’s probably just some SAC MT driver out on a run”

A nodding of heads and warp speed rengaged.. we get a bit lost but arriving at Gut we get an unexpected “ Ahh we have been expecting you, wait here, OC ( possibly ops ) would like a word with whoever is in charge?”

Both myself and the driver look at each other, then turn around and point at our Sgt who has slept all the way and say “ He is”

Waking him up we inform him his presence is required and we both watch as he gets a bollocking outside the guardroom, climbing back in he utters “Cheers guys”

The journey from the Clutch stations or JHQ to Guetersloh was a very variable feast. One day warp drive would get you there 90 minutes early, and on a grotty day with hold-ups 90 minutes late was not unusual. They never finished tinkering with the road in the 13 years I spent in various RAFG locations.

[Ninthace]

It was much further from the Clutch area to Gütersloh than it was in the reverse direction. Meetings down there started at 0930 but meetings at our end could not start until the afternoon and required overnight accommodation for the Clutch and HQ persons.

[langleybaston]

It was much further from the Clutch area to Gütersloh than it was in the reverse direction. Meetings down there started at 0930 but meetings at our end could not start until the afternoon and required overnight accommodation for the Clutch and HQ persons.

If you were a JHQ office-wallah, what's not to like?
But when at Guetersloh I was far too junior [and sins never discovered] to be summoned to JHQ. The only trips were for the Rheindahlen 40km March, and the outstations v. HQ cricket match.

[Krystal n chips]

As a regular commuter, Bruggen to Gut, we had (the troops) a policy of stopping at Recklinghausen going North for lunch...solid and liquid (apart from the driver) hence one day our dynamic and "inspirational leader " could not understand why he had left after us...and arrived some considerable time before us.

When new to the trip, you are advised as to which lanes to be in....most of us heeded this advice, but, alas, some simply knew better. Hence our excursions to Dortmund station one night, another in the direction of Cologne ( the troops helpful silence when these diversions occurred should be noted) and the memorable one to Krefeld with our W.O...stopping to " confirm our location" = lost we alighted and one of our Cpls posed to the question " so, has it changed much since you were last here sir ?"

The moment of blind panic and scream of "don't tell them !!! " as he threw himself into the van was, well, entertaining shall we say...given he was known as "OBE"...

He had formerly vacated a Lanc one night....over Krefeld

[downsizer]

Cheers dits....

[Hydromet]

Definitely career-changing, on pre-graduation exercise, "Are we non-tac yet sir?"

[Ninthace]

If you were a JHQ office-wallah, what's not to like?
But when at Guetersloh I was far too junior [and sins never discovered] to be summoned to JHQ. The only trips were for the Rheindahlen 40km March, and the outstations v. HQ cricket match.
I will tell you what was not to like, I, as the receiving officer ,had to sort out these free-loaders' accommodation, feeding entertainment and hosting, When we went to Rheindahlen, we got zero and were expected to make ourselves scarce at the end of the day. Still rankles.

[BEagle]

So what were the seven career affecting words?

[downsizer]

So what were the seven career affecting words?

That ship sailed off in this thread ages ago.

[Null Orifice]

Uttered by many growbag (or No1s) wearing chaps: " When's it going to be ready, Chief?"

(Yes, I know that When's makes it eight words!) And sometimes there was an expletive inserted before 'ready', particularly when the actual location didn't have a decent four star hotel. :rolleyes:

[teeteringhead]

OC Plod issued a strongly worded SRO entry: "When stn personnel are requested to show their F1250, they are to present it to the RAFP and not to the dog".. My favourite SRO was from Odiham after a rash of sheds/leantos appeared in MQ gardens.

"No erections allowed in MQs without the permission of the Family's Officer"

[dkh51250]

Seven words from a recruiter to a potential member of the Royal Air Force, having completed the aptitude test.
How do you think you did today?

Response from potential member
"Not very well"

Recruiter
Well, there's one question you got right.