Quel Con!

[Flatus Veteranus]

Every year on 14 July, the French air force does a flypast down the Champs Elysées. This year the pilot of one of the Mirages arranged with his parents to “fly-by” their house, which was near Paris, on the way back to base after the fly-past. This he duly did and all went well until, just after passing over his parents’ house, he had a very close encounter with a microlight. Having performed an extreme evasive manoeuvre at very low altitude, he turned back to see if he could spot the microlight which he feared he might have “splashed”. To his relief it was still there, but bouncing around in the turbulence. He thought nothing more of it.

The following week he was on leave staying with his parents, who invited a friend around to dinner. Proud Mum mentioned that her son had flown in the 14 July flypast and was disconcerted when her guest erupted in anger and said he had been up in his microlight that morning and had almost been killed by some stupid “con” in a Mirage! Fighter pilots, the whole world knew, were a bunch of gung-ho cowboys and ought to be thrown into jail, or worse! He could not understand why his hostess was creasing herself laughing until our hero came clean and owned up. A good dinner seems to have smoothed things over and there were no repercussions.

A true story with names and locations omitted to keep our hero out of “le merde”.

"Con" - v. rude. Equivalent to "asshole" in US usage, but refers to a different orifice. :)

[Talk Reaction]

Maybe we could take this on board.....

Perhaps when the feds get flying complaints from now on instead of tracking down and attempting to hang the crew, they could instead invite the complainee to dinner, how terribly nice....


:)

(ps for feds those chaps that ring you up are actually rather friendly)

[Jackonicko]

Yes, well literally Con does indeed mean female front botty, but it's more polite to use the word than to describe someone as being stupide or un cochon (pig).

To call someone un broleur, however, is VERY rude whereas in the USA the term jerk is less offensive. Vive la difference?

[BEagle]

...and if you pronounce 'Toyota MR2' the French way, i.e. "Toyota Emm Airr Deux" it causes Les Froggies endless amusement. For it means "Toyota Ar$ehole".

Which isn't quite as bad as 'Mitsubishi Pajero' in Spanish - I'm told that means "Wan.ker"!

[You want it when?]

Thankyou Beagle that's half my garage knocked out. What is the French for Cadilac Seville STS or better still - "My sail boat is blue and has red sails"

[Talking Radalt]

"Fighter pilots, the whole world knew, were a bunch of gung-ho cowboys and ought to be thrown into jail, or worse"

Worse: In a tent, in the cold and wet, on a large plain near Salisbury, with no electricity, running water or room service...but with a nav and two crewmen :D (and a large green harbinger of underslung loads sinking into the mud outside)

[Jackonicko]

See the Snail-noshing surrender monkeys laugh when they realise that we seriously call anything a Cul-de-Sac (arse of bag).....

[teeteringhead]

Talking Radalt

I don't quite understand what a fighter pilot is doing with a nav and two crewmen!

..... and is it true that Triumph Acclaim translates into German as Sieg Heil?!?

[Talking Radalt]

Funny that cos I know quite a few rotary pilots who don't know what they're doing with a Nav and two crewmen either:(

[TicketyBoo]

I've always been impressed by the French Navy's motto
"Now is the time for us to go to the sea", or as they say in French:

"A l'eau, c'est l'heure"

[Reheat On]

Maybe a genuine case of gallic 'no blame' conflict resolution. No I wonder where else that idea could be tried....

In La Force de l'Aire Royée, Monsieur le Jock would have been on the next train to the outreach of the empire, and Le Boss pondering the wisdom of his tongue in cheek request for a 4 jet posting.

Who has it right one wonders?

[Flatus Veteranus]

Thanks guys! I have given my source a "heads up" for this thread, which may find its way back to a certain Mirage squadron...:D

[skua]

Jacko,
I think the word you are thinking of is "branleur", i.e. w*****r.
Mirage boys to confirm.....

Skua