Catering Tales

[Big Pistons Forever]

Here is mine

Many moons ago when I was a Junior Officer it was discovered that me and 2 of my mates had allowed our pistol quals to lapse. As the senior (?) of the group I was directed to organize a range day to requalify us.

So comes the day the 3 JO’s and the Instructor, Range PO and an Able Seaman gofer assemble at the range for a day of shooting. At 11:30 I sent the AB to the galley to pick up the 6 box lunches I had arranged.

At 12 we break out the lunches expecting the usual lame sandwich, bruised apple and a box of milk 3 days past it’s best before date. Instead we get cold lobster tails, with vegetables artfully carved into decorative designs, exotic fresh fruits and a bottle of high end fizzy water

Well it turned out there were 2 orders for 6 box lunches for the galley that day. The other was for the Minster of Defense and 5 assorted high level mandarins who were taking a Buffalo to an isolated Radar site to “visit the boys”

They were none too impressed with their lunches.........

A massive Shyte storm was soon directed my way, with accusations that we had stolen the Minsters lunch. Just when I started to get worried I was told it was “taken care off”.

Apperntly a 3 star called the Ministers Chief of Staff and asked how it would look if word got our that the Minister was upset over eating the same food as the troops.

That was the end of that and I can still remember how good that lobster tasted :cool:

[uffington sb]

1972. My first posting as an airman. We were allowed to go to the Airmen’s Mess at 21:00 to have tea and toast. As the duty supper was at 22:00, there was usually beans on the servery, so it was beans on toast.
Fast forward to 1987 and now a Cpl. Amending the Queen’s Regs one day, I come across ‘Oc Catering is to provide a light supper I.e. tea and toast to all living in OR’s’. Off I go to the mess at 21:00 only to be told no you can’t have supper.
I phoned OC Cat next day and after a bit of checking QR’s, he said I was right, but please keep quiet about it!
On the next amendment, that paragraph was taken out.

[Saintsman]

Food was poor when I first joined the RAF, though plenty of choice - fried sausages, grilled sausages, baked sausages and if we were lucky, braised sausages in gravy. All on the same day.

I also remember breakfast where there was no fresh milk, but evaporated milk that had been diluted with water to go on your cereals. Yuck!

Exercises were always fun with meals in metal cans that were brought in hotboxes. Always pot luck as to what you were going to get. And we would get a big block of cheese wrapped in grease proof paper, where we had to cut all the dried edges off.

However, in the early 80s there was a step change. Cooks who took great pride in their work and high quality offerings. It was a pleasure going to the mess after that.

[reynoldsno1]

Self-catering was a requirement on the kipper fleet at some locations. A trip downtown to the local supermarket in Andenes was necessary whilst on detachment to Andoya (northern Norway for the uninitiated). We trundled down the aisles picking out tinned culinary delights for a 9 hour sortie the next day, involving 12 epicureans with discerning palates. Visual cues were necessary, as knowledge of the written Norwegian language was somewhat limited, to say the least. We did, however, secure some frozen reindeer steak.
About four hours into the mission, and I was given first tasting of our reindeer stew. My taste buds were mugged, when it became obvious that the two large tins of potatoes added, were, in fact, fish balls of indeterminate origin. I ploughed on, finished the lot, and declared it a magnificent concoction. The next hour was one of consternation, as the rest of the crew struggled to find the same merit in this spawn of the devil that I had. I maintained my praise of the dish until the day I left the Squadron ...

[Krystal n chips]

Cottesmore, mid 70's and the place is in a state of transition thus only a skeleton staff and.....a combined Mess.

All was well at this tranquil idyll until, that is, the arrival of 71 M.U We were working at Wittering, but, ostensibly, there was no room for our little party so, on arrival, we were pointed in the direction of Cottesmore.

It would be fair to say our arrival in said Mess, whose inhabitants were all attired in pristine uniforms and sporting regulation haircuts, induced something akin to major trauma and, strangely, we had no problem in finding a couple of spare tables. Had it been possible to install a mine field and machine gun emplacements with an electric fence between us and them, they probably would have. This was on the Monday and Tuesday was uneventful .

We returned Wednesday evening to find ?........a sumptuous buffet complete with alcoholic beverages no less, all laid out and, nobody around to consume it.

We were never too sure if it was because, with social etiquette ( M.U etiquette that is ) in mind, we started on the beverages first before progressing to quietly demolishing the buffet that the residents got a "shade upset ".......we were summarily evicted from Cottesmore next morning and, miraculously, rooms had been found at Wittering !

It transpired said buffet was, in fact, not actually being provided on our behalf, but for some evening function which nobody had thought to inform us of...which was probably a good idea anyway.

[PTR 175]

During a TECEVAL at St Mawgan, I was detailed to pop down to the mess to pick up the Hot box, tea urn and loaves of bread. Jumped in the Landrover with my collegue and down we went. Lunch was waiting, so we picked up lunch with our weapons slung over our shoulders. Whilst walking out to the car park carrying lunch we were approached by two of the TACEVAL team who had managed to get onto camp. We were then taken hostage and taken off camp where we were 'shot'. We made a miraculus recovery whilst eating 'lunch' with the TAVEVAL team who aparently had not eatten for a while and was one of the reasons we were the target of opportunity. After lunch we were given 'you are dead chits' and driven back onto camp. We, now relieved of our, weapons, NBC suits and the hot box walked back into Nimrod line sans lunch to much derision and doubts about our perantage. Furthermore we got the rest of the TACEVAL off. What a result. Needles to say we were never sent down to pick up lunch again.

[57mm]

Coningsby dining out night late 80s. Prawn cocktail starter. By the time the staff cleared the starters away, several of the diners turned pale and excused themselves. Altogether at least a dozen of us went down with food poisoning. All hushed up, naturally.

[PlasticCabDriver]

No rations at all provided for the night shift guard force at Swinderby early-90s, despite the fact that late supper finished at 2100 and early breakfast didn’t start until 6 (“not entitled”, “they can’t all go at once so some of these chaps won’t eat for 10 hours”, “don’t care - not entitled”,:mad:) so the unedifying sight of the JO Guard Commander stealing bread, jam and biscuits from the cookhouse for his chaps while the cooks looked the other way.

[BEagle]

Dining-in Night at pre-pongo Wattisham. The Stn Cdr liked pheasant, so had decreed that it should appear on the menu...

Pheasant being rather expensive, many portions were more like rubber chickens and tasted about as good. But many also contained lead shot having been rather carelessly prepared.

So for the rest of the dinner, the Stn Cdr was on the receiving end of lead shot at regular intervals - which goes quite a long way when flicked with a knife, as many of us discovered! He wasn't the happiest bunny...:E

[Tankertrashnav]

In flight catering on the V Force was somewhat less impressive than on the kipper fleet. The only provision for hot food was a soup can heater. This was so spectacularly inefficient that we used to reckon if you put a can in it after start up the contents might be luke warm by the time you were approaching top of descent on return from a five hour sortie.

[rolling20]

Tanker, IIRC the B52 was and maybe still is able to use an electric frying pan. There is reference to the actor Brigadier James Stewart accompanying a crew on a 13 hour sortie over Nam and the crew using one to supplement their rations. Apparently it was the tail gunners job to get the rations, bacon,eggs, cheese and bread.

[ImageGear]

My first posting was to the joys of the Mess at Bawtry with courteous service, a cheese board that would be quite at home in the Ritz, and real RAF Chefs who sourced the ingredients and knew what to do with them. Compared with my second posting to El Adem, for those who were around in 1968/69 and remember the reality of the weekly fruit and veg kite arriving from Akro and only containing green beans and little else.
This was allegedly due to a mistake by the catering WO and resulted in my hatred of green beans for half a century.

IG

[KPax]

Bruggen in the mid 70's had an excellent JR Mess, with a very scary WO. He would prowl the Mess with his spoon and any complaints were followed by a dip of his spoon, if the complaint was justified he would bring the guilty Chef out to apologise.

[NutLoose]

So for the rest of the dinner, the Stn Cdr was on the receiving end of lead shot at regular intervals - which goes quite a long way when flicked with a knife, as many of us discovered! He wasn't the happiest bunny...:E

Odiham, Christmas dinner in the airmans mess served by the officers, previous year there had been a food fight, so Staish stands there in his best blues and warns if anyone throws food this year they would be in his office Monday morning, hats off.......... a potato curls it's way through the air in his general direction, followed by various delicacies from the menu as he retreated through the kitchen door having taken a severe pasting.

Odiham, summer, tasty looking ham salad on the servery, helps myself and sits down, flips over ham to cut it and finds the underside covered in fly eggs.... wanders up and points at it, Sgt Cook rapidly withdraws the salad, but does not tell any of the other unfortunates tucking into it for fear of a riot.

[langleybaston]

As a Metman I did deployments with both the army and [once] with the Harriers. I have no complaints about the HF.
As for 1 BR Corps, sumptuous breakfast with, inter alia, fresh baked bread rolls. "The caterers need practice on deployment too". But did some mess silver [really!] have to deploy?
No complaints at all.

I expect a fair few sections like us enlivened night duties with airfield mushrooms, into the frying pan within 5 minutes of plucking. At Leeming and Topcliffe the night shift took it in turns to bring in bacon, eggs, sausage .........
When the Duty Pilot came in for his early heads-up, the place stank of the fryup. On occasion he was just in time for a modest offering.

[Pontius Navigator]

My first posting was to the joys of the Mess at Bawtry with courteous service, . . . Compared with my second posting to El Adem, for those who were around in 1968/69
Of the first, when I went to get some cheese. "This is a Group HQ Sir, we serve the cheese.

Of the second I still remember the finest Fillet Mignon I have had. The Route was closed as the Hastings had been grounded and the aircrew feeder staff had little to do but serve our lone Ranger crew the finest of foods. We had taken 96 pints of fresh milk out.

[NutLoose]

Best ever service meals I had were at Bruggen, the cook who wanted to be a professional Chef when he left the RAF would use QRA as an excuse to practice, he work through his book of superb recipes and as he was only cooking for the crews he would ask us groundcrew what we fancied,he would work with us on a menu, then go off to plunder the catering stores, he was a delight to have on as our cook and we prayed he would be on our shifts, even the aircrew hoped he would be on.

[rolling20]

St Athan Officers Mess kitchen wasn't usually locked ,so us poor hungry UAS bods would help ourselves to steak, microwaved,after we returned from the bar or somewhere off base after hours. One night we were rumbled by a RM Major and two naval officers ,who were there also looking for a late night supper. They promised to keep mum if we cooked them one each as well, which we did. Soon after that episode ,the kitchen was locked .We circumvented that one by going through the roof, which took some doing. Soon after that they put a padlock on the fridge and freezer, so our late night eating was finished.As an aside, I did hear some poor W/C ask for steak for lunch in the mess one day and being told there was none, tutted that in 20 years in the RAF, steak had always been available!

[Danny42C]

At Chittagong (May, 1943), there was an accommodation problem. Our few officers could be fitted in the Mess on the station. But there was no room for the influx of aircrew NCOs. We were dumped in a transit camp in the town. As the Squadron came to readiness at dawn, we had to up at first light and out to the airfield, long before breakfast in the transit camp.

A bunch of hungry and resentful sergeants faced the prospect of flying the Squadron's first operation without even a mug of tea. Our M.O. (Dr "Pete" Latcham - I'm glad he survived the war) was rightly indignant. He got hold of an empty and cleanish four-gallon can, borrowed a blowlamp from the engineers, scrounged the makings of a brew from somewhere, and made the best mug of tea we'd had for a long time. He couldn't get much in the food line for us except emergency rations: "Ship's biscuits" and a tin of jam (plum, I think). Not much but better than nothing. Well done, that man! I'll always remember that "breakfast". As it happened, we didn't fly that day. But the fur flew, and from next morning there was early breakfast for us in the Transit Camp ......

[Danny42C]

ITW, Newquay, summer 1941. We'd only just arrived: the Airmen's Dining Hall was in the commandeered "Trebarwith" Hotel. Cold meat (probably "Spam") and salad for dinner tonight, chaps.

One chap had not examined the lettuce he'd just picked up carefully enough. Back at the table, when he turned it over on his plate, there was an inch-long black snail busy munching away at it.

"Orderly Officer ! - Any complaints ?" .... Despite silent hard prodding by his two tablemates, our lad was far too shy of authority to say a word. The Orderly Officer and Sergeant hadn't noticed the snail, and walked away.

No - he didn't eat it ! But he never lived it down for the six weeks of the Course, and had to answer to "Snaily !" for the rest of his time with us.

[ian16th]

a tin of jam (plum, I think).

I think the wartime stocks of Plum Jam lasted well into the 50's.

When Coninsby re-opened in 1956, all OR's were eating in the Sgts Mess, the Airmens Mess wasn't finished.
The food was terrible, but we were kept going by the 'it will get better when the new mess is finished' story.

When we moved into the new mess it was terrible.
A National Service guy wrote to his MP.
The Command Catering officer turned up un-announced, at lunch time and he saw how poor the food was.
That night at tea, what we had would have graced the Savoy! This was kept up for about a week, but the level that it fell back to was very good.

[Fortissimo]

Falklands 1991, the Death Star, and a rare consignment of mange-tout arrives...

For 2 days we had what is best described as a mange-tout frenzy, with said veg being on the books for every meal, breakfast included. Mange-tout fritters, soup, flan, puree, salad etc. - if you could think of a way of presenting mange-tout, it would be tried. Death by mange-tout was fast becoming an option, it was everywhere and in everything.

Day 3, dinner: "What, no mange-tout?" I enquired gently of the chef. "No Sir, we've used it all!"

[MATELO]

During a 3 week long full tactical Ex, two ground leccys appeared with McDonalds wrappers and cups. Where the F'in H*** did you get them from we all asked. "The DS got them for us, all you need is the code words depending on what meal you want"

Cue - two days & a torrent of nonsensical phrases and name calling to the DS causing so much bemusement. :ugh:

Wasn't until day 3 of trying, when the two lads actually said they had bought the MacDonald's in advance of the Ex & carefully folded the wrappers up in their bergens, to be opened at a suitable time in the exercise.

Laugh or Cry. We didn't know what to do.

[oldbeefer]

I will never forget the quite amazing meals that the Chefs at Gutersloh managed to provide when the helicopter force was deployed to the field. OK, they had fresh rations, but with only very basic cooking equipment they did an amazing job. Funny how AAC aircraft always seemed to pop in to our site around meal times!

[Lou Scannon]

Late 60's,Changi Airmens Mess...Orderly Officer doing his rounds.
Any complaints?
One young airman complained that it was the same old choice everyday.
OO looks around the mess. Indian bar, Chinese bar, etc etc giving 32 choices of main meal.
OO smiles at young airman and advises him not to get married!

and in the dessert:
anyone remember the triangular sausages served up at El Adem?

[tremblerman]

Leuchars, mid seventies. Q.R.A. meals all provided by the Officers Mess.
As designated driver, only one allowed out of the Q.R.A. shed unless in an F4, on way to pick up chef and rations when hooter goes.
Q.R.A. is exempt so continue to O.M.
Get to tradesman's entrance and informed no chef was available as they were all on guard.
Sergeant i/c says no rations either but you can have these. 200 roast duck freshly cooked for the now cancelled dining in night!
It is possible to have too much of a good thing

[Fareastdriver]

Sepulot, in the middle of Sabah Province, North Boneo, 1966 in the middle of Confrontation by Indonesia. Pitched up with my Whirlwind Mk 10 to take over the RN's tasking because both their cabs are sick. Billeted in the Ghurkhas Officers basha with my own room, bed. mossy net and side table. Dinner is called. We eat off regimental crockery and the Tiger is served in silver goblets. After dinner we retire to the veranda and listen to the wildlife of the jungle's evening chorus.

[kintyred]

On exchange with a foreign Air Force, I was about to go on exercise and picked up my lunch box before adding a Mars Bar from the Squadron Crewroom Shop. I also bought a few extra Mars Bars which I shoved into my Bergen. During our lunch stop I and my colleagues tucked into our rat boxes. One saw the Mars Bar in my box and said "Hey, how come you got a Mars Bar and we didn't?" I didn't say anything but opened my Bergen and handed him one. On seeing the stash of several Mars Bars he then berated me for taking them out of other people's boxes. Still I didn't respond. Half an hour later, after he had spoken to the rest of the detachment, he realised that there hadn't ever been any Mars Bars in the lunch boxes and humbly proferred his apologies! He didn't hear the end of it for the rest of the det.....and most it came from his own colleagues!

[Warmtoast]

I was with 99 Sqn in the early 1960's and have a couple of catering (lunchbox) memories.

The Best Lunch Box
Best lunch box I remember was that supplied from Embakasi in Nairobi in Sept 1961.
With some sort of trouble brewing in the Gulf it was decided the Army brigade based in East Africa would be transferred to Bahrain, a long Britannia flog of many hours - Embakasi - Khormaksar - Bahrain and then back again to do the same trip several times over to get the brigade to up Bahrain.

Anyway on the first trip we left Embakasi, dished out the lunch boxes to the squaddies in the back and then heard mutterings of complaint. When asked what was wrong, the general consensus was that the 'jam' tasted salty. It turned out each lunch box contained a small pot of something to be spread on the rolls or biscuits or whatever and the contents were very salty.
Investigation quickly showed the pots were in fact pots of Caviar, real Caviar and not ersatz Lumpfish roe. This was not immediately obvious to the troops so we collected any unopened and unwanted pots and put them aside for later crew use.
Their loss was our gain!

Later, but not with 99 sqn - the worst lunchbox ever - for me anyway.

https://cimg4.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/800x600/khartoumlunchboxc_1980_1066x800_f5ac446d80fbb1f37bf774257bd3 30e79bd226cb.jpg
Lunchbox as provided by civilian caterers at Khartoum in 1979.
A couple of ropey rolls and two dead bananas - so awful I had to photograph it for posterity. Mind you it couldn't have been too bad because ISTR none of the crew had to be hospitalised afterwards!

[Avtrician]

One year in Victoria (SE Australia) at Balcome Army Camp, the only living in Officer at Xmas, decided to give the Mess Staff a break so told them he wouldnt be in for lunch and they could go home to their families, he was going to the beach.

At 1200, on the Beach, a Staff car Heavy arrived and out came the mess staff in full formal attire and trooped down the beach carrying large silver platters, a table, chair, and an ice box.

The poor hossifer had to sit at the table, and be served his 3 course Xmas lunch with dessert and wine. Much to the mirth of the general public on the beach..

[Melchett01]

I remember my first tour fondly for several reasons, one of them being the Mess was heaving with first and second tourists who enjoyed the operational work and then enjoyed a convivial evening most days. Dining in nights were no exception and we didn’t think twice about going to McDonalds for a few happy meals and persuading the Mess Stewards to replace Mr Vice’s starter with said hamburger and plastic toy. One day they tried it on me and when the burger arrived I called the Steward over. I was slightly more senior having joined up with extra seniority courtesy of my MSc and they all thought the grumpy flt lt was going to have a paddy. Instead I simply asked for cutlery - standards don’t you know - and when asked if I was really going to eat it replied of course, I’ve seen who’s on duty in the kitchen and this will be the best thing all night.

Several months later I somehow found myself living on a balcony in Baghdad eating MREs daily for 4 months, using my bayonet to make marmite sandwiches and being taught how to make MRE bombs by our tame USMC Gunny. The EOD unit didn’t see the funny side!

[DGAC]

Gatow circa 1968. Officers Mess entry in Messing Suggestions Book. “Sqn Ldr X, nut and bolt in mashed potato and Flt Lt Y, screw and washer in cabbage, would like to meet with any other Mess members interested in forming a light engineering company”

[Pontius Navigator]

Cpl Jenkins was a steward at Cottesmore. Not sure where he worked but probably the feeder. Now Jenkins always seemed to get on the dispersal exercises. I don't think the SACs liked him because he was so efficient.

First time was at Ballykelly. We arrived, turned the aircraft round and came up on state and then went the dispersal accommodation. There, tables laid with fresh linen, Jenkins brought out our post-flight meal, ham eggs and chips I think - all five at once. The other 3 crews received the same superb attention. The exercise continued with Jenkins managing the Bomber Command 4-hr eating cycle. Later we had afternoon tea before stacking for the night, a few beers in the Mess, steaks in the bar, and back to our bedrooms in the dispersal, but not before supper where Jenkins produced more ham and eggs.

Another time at Pershore Jenkins contains in that vein but found time to light a coal fire in the crew room.

While he was not officially a cook he turns his hand to anything and made the austere dispersal into comfortable mini-Messes. To my shame we never saw how our groundless fares as once on state our movement was limited and on stand down we would go to the Mess or off base.

[teeteringhead]

lbBut did some mess silver [really!] have to deploy? But (probably) as I was once advised by a subaltern of some fractional cavalwy wegiment in the field on a similar occasion:

"It's only the travelling silver dontcherknow...."

[NutLoose]

Re the butty box, Cpl Rigger at Brize was seen going through the rubbish bags full of the used in flight butty boxes during a major RAFG exercise, ( we were sending plane after plane out full of pongoes), later he was seen doing the same in the skip. It turned out he had opened a box and noticed it had a Shiphams meat paste jar in it and on the label it stated something along the lines of collect 5 labels for a £1 and there were just over 156 labels per flight, times that by several flights and it started to add up to a fair bit of money at the time.

[binbrook]

Catering memories:
Cranwell early 50s: late supper kept warm for returning sportsmen to help themselves - pilchards tinned in tomato sauce, dipped in batter and deep-fried. Surprisingly tasty.
Gibraltar late 50s: late lunch for arriving crew - the remains of the meal prepared for the SoS and party, on their way to S America. It started with lobster and went on from there.
El Adem also late 50s: early breakfast for departure to Eastleigh - fried sliced spam and dried egg 'omelette'. Edible, but one nav started with cereal and the reconstituted milk got him about 4 hours later. Straight to SSQ on arrival.

[Voutezac]

AEW Shacks. Three radar screens, four operators, so a ready made chef. Take off, galley on, tea and coffee all round, swiftly followed by hot dogs. That gave time to do bacon, sausage, fried eggs, beans and mushrooms. Lunch - endless possibilities, but “honkers” stew was always a favourite. Oh by the way, the menu didn’t really relate to take off time either...Away for the night at, I think, Honington. Explained to their caterers that we might be tasked for QRA when airborne, so had to ration accordingly. Airborne, aimed for home, in flight raffle.....and the winner of the bacon is.....the captain - loud cries of “fix”!
And yes I was a better cook than I was an AEW Op.

[stevef]

RAF Colerne, gate guard duty sometime in the early 70s. I forget what the usual routine for late supper was but clearly remember on one occasion an amorphous meal of chips, beans and a broken fried egg being delivered to us in a soggy paper bag. No cutlery either.

[Melchett01]

Warmtoast’s photo reminded me on coming back from TELIC. Having spent a good part of the year away in Incirlik then Baghdad, with Baghdad being US MREs for months I finally returned to the bosom of the caring RAF when I got down to Basra for the trip back to Blighty. Usual Movements faff meant we arrived about 24 hrs early and other than counting the bullet holes and playing I spy there wasn’t much to do and no shops open in the International terminal. It was like a Middle East version of Brize.

Sensing they probably should feed us they brought a boiler out, a box of tea bags and a big box of sausage rolls. The only problem with the rolls was on inspection and checking the ingredients we decided they probably had a half life rather than a shelf life and they were frozen solid. Stick a charge bag behind them and you could easily fire it from a Chally 2 and take out an Iraqi tank with one. When we asked about how we were supposed to defrost them, ‘dunno’ was the (obvious) answer, so we ended up turning the boiler up to full and wrapping the outside with sausage rolls hoping the heat would defrost them sometime before we died of starvation. In hindsight, it’s probably just as well we couldn’t defrost them. Survive the war, felled by MOD rations on the way home doesn’t make for a good war story to impress the girls!

[Mogwi]

Many decades ago and a very long way south; re-arm at Port San Carlos not only consisted of 30mm and AIM9L but often a couple of upland geese up the back hatch. On RTB the chefs downloaded the geese and processed them. We had enough by the end to use them as a main course for the victory dinner - Goose Galtieri (followed by broccoli ice cream!).

Swing the lamp!

[Cubanate]

One of my best-ever curries was in 1990 on-board a VC10 taking Gurkhas from Nepal to the UK, via Nairobi The flight was over-catered so I got to have 3!!

[Busta]

Babies heads arriving in the HAS at Wattisham on exercise, never managed to eat more than two before the hooter went off!

[Krystal n chips]

Valley..Airmen's Mess......enter "Paddy the Chin ", so named because he had several on view. Paddy was rarely seen during the day as he seemed to prefer nights. This was possibly because he could produce his signature dish, without any distractions such as cooking food, notably doing his, and the families, washing in those large boilers that graced RAF Messes everywhere. All was not entirely lost to the culinary world however, because, to his credit, he produced what he lovingly referred to as a "whore of an omelette" which consisted of about 96 eggs and whatever else he could use as a filling. You learnt very quickly to be selective when on nights unless Paddy was off that night.

Not to be outclassed, he was joined by "Tiny " who was a really nice guy, albeit somewhat "well built " but of whom it would be fair to say would never rank among the top chefs of this world....one of Tiny's more notable culinary achievements came when asked to provide meals for a Vulcan crew that had arrived on one of those sight seeing jollies they liked to go on from time to time. Tiny duly complied with this order to the best of his ability and filled that hot locker container with .......a selection of fruit and.....jam sandwiches. It subsequently emerged the crew did not entirely appreciate this a la carte dining option.

Gutersloh......we witnessed a "difference of opinion " about the quality of a steak being prepared for a Rock...to be fair, the food at Gut at that time was very good...and the cook. The Rock made the fatal mistake of leaving the servery and turning his back on said chef. The steak left the spatula at a speed and with an accuracy any pro tennis player would be in awe of......and arrived firmly on the back of the Rocks head. It all got a bit "up close and personal " thereafter. . .

[Pontius Navigator]

On 8, one D M was reputed to have baked a sponge cake.

[Ogre]

Of all the messes I sampled, there weren't really any that stood put for the standard of the food above the others (but then being younger I was not that bothered about the quality as long as it was hot when required). One thing that I was taught though was that working on the flight line meant a whole new way to efficiently consume lunch. When hotlocks were served the trick was to remove the lid, cover the top with a slice of bread, invert the tin, remove the tin and add a further slice of bread on top. Proof that you can put anything on a sandwich.

Honourable mentions though should go to the mess at PSAB in the late 90's, they even taught the locally employed serving staff to say "one sausage only" in English.

[Tashengurt]

Babies heads, straight from the hotlock were marvellous!
I always wondered where the cooks got the recipe for that beef stew that appeared everywhere on any exercise.
Supper at Leuchars was always good. Perhaps because it tended to be sneaked in between recoveries. Chip butties. Always.

[It's Not Working]

Ogre-Wasn't an invite to the diner at PSAB used as currency when bartering with our cousins? I seem to remember you were allowed a guest a month. For my sins I was at Eskan <SP> and was allowed into Riyadh to eat each night which, bar the odd dose of food poisoning from a dodgy salad, was very much appreciated. Eating a chip butty in a very British style fish and chip shop while it was 40+C outside was a surreal experience.

[DC10RealMan]

I had a friend who was a chef in the Officers Mess who was constantly being "hauled over the coals" for his un-Airman like qualities and demeanour by certain members of the Officer class. He would smile benignly whilst undergoing this berating and humiliation whilst being dismissed by the Officer as some kind of simpleton, however my friend knew that later that day he would be making the same Officers dinner and that "Revenge is a dish best eaten cold"

[Wander00]

So back in 1960 some 150 CCF cadets plus assorted schoolmasters masquerading as hofficers arrived for Army Section summer camp at Lydd. Although of the RAF persuasion in the Corps, I was there because e I was an (indifferent) tenor drummer in the pipe band. On arrival a bit of a hiatus as the meal due, (high tea) was nowhere to be seen, nor indeed were any catering staff. I get hauled in to see the CO, who gruffly informs me in his Scots accent that (at 16 and a bit) I had become OC Catering, and they would like some supper in an hour and then I was "it" for the week, on account that I wanted to go Cranwell and be an officer and leader of men.

So no more drumming for me, a team of catering hands posted in every day and the biggest pile of compo boxes I have seen in my life. It all went well, pat on the head at the end of the week, and a £5 (lot of money in those days) book token. Never did hear what had happened to the caterers that were supposed to be ther, and when I got home my Mother particularly would not believe I had catered for 150 odd people for a week.

Nicest thing a caterer did for me - Binbrook, 2100 hrs and just finished Pt 1 Taceval (the one in Jun 81 for those that were there). Just about to go in the bar for a pint or 3 when I heard the OM reception phone ringing. Answered it and it was my brother who had been trying to get me since lunchtime to tell me Mum had had a stroke from which she was unlikely to recover. Go back in the bar and tell my boss I am off to the hospital in NW London and I will ring in in the morning. As I walk out of the bar the Cpl Steward stops me, says "You might need these sir", and handed me a packet of sandwiches. How he knew I do not know, but one of the kindest things anyone ever did for me. And I got to Mount Vernon Hospital 10 minutes before she died.

[NutLoose]

Brize, signal comes through re fuel saving, Boss looks out window as Ten goes past on tow with APU running and lit up to the nines, "there is an example Flight, you do not need the APU running to tow", Young NL gets summond to office given the signal to read and asked "why were you runnning the APU?", answers "to power the galleys, how else was I going to heat my Dulles Burgers" :E

[gr4techie]

When Coninsby re-opened in 1956, all OR's were eating in the Sgts Mess, the Airmens Mess wasn't finished.
The food was terrible, but we were kept going by the 'it will get better when the new mess is finished' story.

When we moved into the new mess it was terrible.
A National Service guy wrote to his MP.
The Command Catering officer turned up un-announced, at lunch time and he saw how poor the food was.

62 years later, nothing has changed

[wub]

280 SU RAF Troodos, a unit manned by RAF and Army personnel from 259 Signals Regiment. The GOC Cyprus was on his annual inspection of his part of the unit and called in to the Junior Ranks Mess at lunchtime. Usual dril, carry on eating unless spoken to, answer quaestions honestly and finish your meal. GOC approaches a diner and asks the signalman if he as any complaints. Signalman downs tools, pauses for a moment and answers “Yes, Sir” Cue awkward glances and shuffling from OC catering and entourage. Signalman continues “My greatcoat doesn’t fit me”, picks up tools and carries on eating.

[Old Bricks]

Some years ago I was admitted to the hospital at RAF Halton. As usual, because you hadn't been there the day before, there was no food ordered for you, so you basically got what had been ordered by whoever had subsequently discharged. Day 2 - early start for operation, so unconscious/blotto for most of day and only got slice of toast later in the day. Needless to say, order forms for meals on Day 3 came round whilst blotto, so Day 3 pretty much repeat of Day 1. However , did manage to fill in food order form for Day 4. Nurse tells me that Day 4 is also the first day of the new catering contract, so food bound to be huge improvement (?) Day 4 - wake up feeling pretty good and looking forward to breakfast - order was for orange juice, tea, "continental" rolls with jam. Tray arrives with cover over plate. I sit up in bed, drink tea and then remove cover on plate. Nothing. Not even a crumb of a passing roll. Bare as a badger's ****. Call for nurse. She calls for sister. Nurse is instructed to phone caterers, who do not believe it. Their quality control would have picked it up. Man sent up to examine empty plate. We all agree there is nothing on it. Could I have a replacement, please? Sorry, says caterer. We stopped doing breakfast hours ago, we're only doing lunch now. Kind nurse manages to make a slice of toast for me....

[Pontius Navigator]

ISK, late 70s, regular war stock turnover. Lunch was steak and kidney pudding. The S&K was tasty meriting at least 9/10. Presentation nil points as the half tin-shaped suet pastry still had the maker's name and date stamp. Muppets.

[DeepestSouth]

OC Detachment for a major NATO exercise "somewhere in Southern Germany", the detachment was multi-national in a German Army barracks with catering provided by the US and Canadian Armies. I'm in the line for breakfast, plate at the ready to receive the standard US/Canadian fare which was excellent and piled up as we progressed along the servery. As we reached the end of the servery, chatting to my colleague I took my eye off proceedings, moved on only to find the whole plate had been flooded with maple syrup! An odd set of flavours but when you're on exercise...!

[MPN11]

RAF Stanley, 1983. The main option for eating lunch on the airfield site was SAS-Det (Soup and Sandwich Detachment of Catering Squadron), as it was generally too time-consuming/inconvenient to go back to the Coastel to eat. Apart from Bread, 'Butter', Jam, Cheese and Soup du Jour the diet was occasionally enhanced by Pizza [which was pretty tasteless]. In conversation with one of the cooks, he explained that they couldn't get any decent ingredients such as appropriate herbs. A note to a friend in the UK resulted in a pile of herbs various arriving by Herk [not much additional weight involved] which I duly delivered to the Cooks. The enhanced Pizza became the go-to lunch option!

https://i.imgur.com/5RmRLtc.jpg

[Adam Nams]

Operating the Mighty Hunter out of Seeb, we could only get rations through the local handling agent who catered for the likes of BA. On arrival, the rations for the tasking next day were duly ordered by yours truly: two main meals and a snack for fifteen persons, deliver to aircraft at 0900 local.

When we got to the hotel we received the news that the tasking had been put back to 1300. No problem. Phone the agent and explain that rations were now required for 1100.

Well, funny old thing, next day on arrival at the aircraft two things were apparent. Firstly, the AEO, who had made a pot of ‘honkers stew’ on the way down to Seeb had not washed up the pot, which had been left to fester overnight and most of the following morning. That had to be dealt with (another story for another time). Secondly, the rations duly turned up at 1100. Result. However, the rations for 0900 were also on board the van. Yes, two lots of rations. The meals came in the form of the standard airline plastic trays filled with exquisite delights including a side salad of smoked salmon for starters, and wonderful deserts - obviously made up for business class. BUT, fifteen persons x 3 trays x 2 orders came to … quite a lot of trays, which had to be stacked up in the galley with the overflow going into the ordnance section. On top of the last tray was a printed sheet of paper listing the individual meal types and a column (left blank on this occasion) which would usually have stated the cost of the meal. That was good, as I could use this piece of paper to send around the crew when asking for their selection from the choice of 4 main meals and two snacks each.

As the ‘menu’ made its way around, some of the wet and dry team decided it would be a good idea to play ‘guess how much your meal costs’ and with stifled giggling, started to put their guesses down in the blank column. The last person then totted up the figures and entered the quite substantial total at the base of the column. I do not recall how much the total was, but what I do recall is my name being shouted (or rather ‘bawled’) by the very irate Nav Captain who had just been handed what he assumed to be the bill for 90 meals. His anger was compounded by having to fight his way through the stacked up plastic trays in the galley, and past a still rancid pan of burned honkers stew, to ‘have a word’. The situation was resolved when it was pointed out that there was no way that a tray of salad with pate, duck l ’orange, a fruit compote, followed by cheese and biscuits would ever cost as much as the Lead Wet had thought and apart from which, would you like your tray of sandwiches and packet of peanuts now, or after we get airborne?

[ian16th]

Old Bricks reminded me of this one.

Admitted to RAF Hospital Ely to have wisdom teeth removed.

Longtime ward resident asks, "Can I have your lunch tomorrow?"

[aloominumtoob]

1962. Barkston Heath, where the square pegs from Cranwell were detatched to, sort of a "punishment posting." A supper time list what time one required a wake up call, and what beverage to accompany this call. Upon being roused, asked what one would like for breakfast and at what time. Food was extremely good. Many fought not to be returned to Cranwell.
1971. MAMS: Rushed to BZZ to catch a Brit. to act as Handling Agent supervisor on a rotation double shuttle Hanover- Aldergrove. Rationed ex-BZZ for 110pax each leg. 440 goodie boxes. However, 'twas not a rotation but a re-inforcement, return legs empty. Morning departure from Hanover up rolls handling agent catering with 220 goodie boxes. We tried to explain but were told they had already been paid for and they would not take them back. Next departure, same thing happened. Of course, first in, first out, the AH and AS boxes were distributed first. The civil meals were much more palatable, and the crew + Muppet left the aeroplane with big black bags of goodies!
Someone mentioned the triangular sausages? Compo., That shape to get more in the tin. Delicious!
ALT

[Danny42C]

In hospital once, (patient's grub notoriously poor), my dinner came slopped on a plate ...
"If you put that in front of your husband, he'd take a stick to you ", I said to the ward Sister - "and he'd be right !"

I was not popular !

[MPN11]

How to keep slim. Afternoon shift in Strubby GCA meant you had to leave Manby before Lunch. Morning shift meant you got back to Manby after Lunch. A Day-worker covered the overlap of the shifts, who probably got no Lunch either!

[Dan Gerous]

https://i.imgur.com/5RmRLtc.jpg
That pic brings back the memories MPN11. I well remember the SAS catering tent. I recall the Pizza's as being pretty good, and there was always a rush to get there and get one before they ran out. I don't remember them doing them every day, but I may be wrong. I was there Dec82-May 83, so if you were in part responsible, thanks. I worked over at those 4 Rubbs (Called Spandrells), in the background, which was Ground Equip/GSES. At the join in your pic where the sea meets land, the 3 section tent to the right of the dark mound, was where the "proper" mess was located. I think this was RAF run, but the Army had a say in the portion sizes, and they were small, so most of us just used to go to the SAS for Scooby Snacks. Meat, cheese and jam on 3 slices of bread, in one large convenient serving, with no plates to wash after. I think most of us put away a lot of food down there and never seemed to put weight on, but one guy who did gain a little, earned the nickname Spandrell Belly.

[MPN11]

Not me, Dan Gerous ... I was there May-Sep 83, so just missed you! SASDet was, of course, very conveniently located opposite ATC. As was the "Sapper Crapper"* just out of shot to the right.


* Slight thread drift: ATC had a proper flush toilet on the ground floor [the old passenger terminal). One of my young ATCOs dived into the tower water tank and repaired the 30mm cannon holes in it, so that it [largely] held water again. Topped up by the fire section, and the key held by the ATC Supervisor! Access by ATC and OC Ops (C4) only, unless someone wanted to do some trading for the use of it! :)

[Saint Jack]

1. As a Boy Entrant at St. Athan circa 1962 the food in one of the messes (not ours) was so bad that two entire entries boycotted a meal time, needless to say it got someone's attention as the CO was a Group Captain.
2. Seletar circa 1966, West Camp Airman's Mess, one of the best lunch buffet spreads I've ever seen on a military installation. the cheeseboard was extraordinary.
3. Not military, but on an offshore oil installation tied-up at Shanghai I had one of the best lunches I've ever had - roast lamb, roast potatoes and ALL the trimmings, would have cost a fortune elsewhere.

[Kerosene Kraut]

Great thread. However I'd miss some pictures please.

[Onceapilot]

Delivered a Tonka to Honnington from Bruggen in mid '80s, with a VIP Andover laid on to return us, sharpish, back to Bruggen (due on in QRA!). Anyhow, the Andover was available to take us as it had been on standby for a task transporting Mrs T somewhere. The Andover was pristine so, felt a little incongruous trying not to soil the decor in full Tonka kit! Andover crew were great, full silver service, fine teas, salmon sandwiches, vol-au-vents and clotted cream scones all served with style and a smile in the plush, sound deadened VIP transport! Apparently, Mrs T had taken the train instead, the aircraft was released to transport us and, we got Mrs T's grub! Great! :ok:

OAP

[Pontius Navigator]

Stn Cdr at Akrotiri, Air Cdre Stacey, was an extrovert Alpha Male and loved to show off. Lord Carrington was staging through an route Far East and arriving at dawn. Naturally this was too good an opportunity to show boat so Stacey laid on a full white-glove, silver-service breakfast on the cliff tops as the Sun rose.

Style.

[Dan Winterland]

VC10 tanker self catering on Operation Provide Comfort (Incirlik) often included 'Betty Crocker' cake mixes. The cake would be mixed en-route to the towline, baked while 'sausage side' and eaten with coffee on RTB. We used to take a lot of American passengers on these trips as they couldn't fly in their own nation's aircraft and also because if they crossed the border, got yet another medal. A PA would be made stating that we were now over enemy territory and that the US passengers could have a medal, all passengers of other nations could have a slice of cake. One day we had a news team from the Washington Post flying with us who reported the cake baking activities in their journal. The British Ambassador to Washington read it and choked on his morning croissant. The news reached us at lightning speed the day after the flight concerned. We continued to bake cakes.

[spekesoftly]

How to keep slim. Afternoon shift in Strubby GCA meant you had to leave Manby before Lunch. Morning shift meant you got back to Manby after Lunch. A Day-worker covered the overlap of the shifts, who probably got no Lunch either!



Things had improved by the early 70s. ATC could take an early lunch in the Manby 'aircrew diner'. There were also catering facilities at Strubby itself, where the Morning and Day shifts could eat at lunchtime.

[TLDNMCL]

A very long time ago, I was ear-marked to be the next Dulles Red-Eye groundcrew member on the regular VC10 "Diplomatic" trips. We were carrying a coupleu of fuel computers / regulators for a Tristar which had gone sick in Anchorage. The idea was that we would drop in at Goose, the Tri would transit Canada on two engines, we would hand over the spares and be on our way.
On arrival, an apparent Eskimo wearing RAF Sgt. stripes boarded, "Got a TLDNMCL on board?" "Yep, that's me."
"Read this" (Hands me a signal print-out).
In short, the weather was so buggered across Alaska, that the Tri couldn't leave to make the trip to meet us. I would have to courier the spares via Dulles, then civvy flights to Salt Lake City, ditto to Anchorage pending weather improvements, (The 10 was scheduled for other tasking, had to continue the planned Red-Eye) hence plan B.
Got there, handed over spares and off to the hotel. When I awoke, I realised I had not received any re-joining instructions! Call back to Brize "Cadge a lift back with 216 when their aircraft is fixed."
Aeroplane fixed, flight crew plus one very bored steward on the leg back from Alaska - UK; oh and one passenger. Couple that with an over- catered aeroplane, no in flight entertainment, and a steward with sod all to do. I think the flight crew did rather well out of it too...

[Dougie M]

In Riyadh during the Gulf war we had two Caterers who were tasked to reduce the cost of HOTAC and were known collectively as Melchett and Darling. They decreed that preflight meals would be taken at King Khaled International feeder where the airfield defence force dwelt in the stygian gloom of the subterranean offices. At the outbreak of hostilities the Saudi Air stewards and cooks mysteriously vanished but undeterred this stalwart team brought on the B team and posted that "A simple egg meal" would be provided. This consisted of a foot wide Saudi flatbread, slit open at a point on the circumference, into which a lightly fried egg was delivered with force by a surly Cpl cook. The trick was then to carefully bite into the flatbread without squirting egg all over your lap. Melchett and Darling wrote each other up so laudably that they got an OBE and MBE on returning to the U.K. It makes you proud to serve.

[turbroprop]

First Gulf Shindig

Billy Smarts Bahrain.

[132bod]

First Gulf Shindig

Billy Smarts Bahrain.

Nice food if you didn't mind the LOX store next door! When a new larger tank was going to be installed, I queried "You really want that here?" and explained the consequence of damage.

The new tank got installed out in the boondocks, no lights and a half hour baggage tractor drive each way.

[ivor toolbox]

RAF Swinderby, Jul/Aug 79, and our entry is off to the Catterick training area for a weeks camping, known as MFT. Arrive on site, build tents and dig latrines etc, first nights food, a stew, supplied in hot boxes that had come all the way from Swinderby at 45mph in 4 tonner with rest of convoy. Trouble is, hot boxes came with an added bonus bug... cue lots of running about in the dark and full latrine trenches overnight and a visit from the Swinderby MO with 'Immodium' in a jab format for 180 airmen. Yours truly, and one of the DI staff had declined the stew the night before, and only had mashed potato, so we didn't suffer, but we weren't popular next day.


Ttfn

[Pontius Navigator]

RAF South Cerney, winter '61 in the Brecons, no hot locks. Lunch first day, peel spuds, put in water dixies, bring to the boil and boil and boil. Some hours later they were still like rocks.

Lunch time approached and minced beef and mashed potatoes served and all fellow cadets satisfied with our efforts.

Post lunch the DS made us retrieve the rock like spuds from the river, chop them up into smaller pieces and try again. They were ready for summer.

No one any the wiser and we his the powdered potato tins.

[Nomendum]

Coltishall, 1965.

J.R.'s Mess had a very bad cockroach problem, around the server.

Cue comment in Mess Comments Book:


"At supper last night, there were more cockroaches than dinners, If you cannot get rid of them, please can you arrange a separate sitting for them".

A sad tale from an otherwise super station.

[Tengah Type]

In the early days of the VC10K the" Powers that be" had decided to save money by not having ALMs on the crews. The "Cabin Supervisor" duties could be carried out by a spare aircrew member. We had also acquired a stock of ex-BA First Class cutlery and crockery. It was also agreed by Accounts that, to save money when down route, they would pay $10US per head to self cater which was a big saving on the cost of airline meals trucked in from miles away. It became a matter of pride to do a great job of catering if you were the Cabin Supervisor, sometimes with unforseen circumstances.

On one trip across Canada we had 2 VIP seats installed on the port side of the cabin for a 4* and his PSO. VIP meals were trucked in at vast expense for them . After they had been fed their very nice but very small VIP meals, they were able to watch the groundcrew the other side of the aisle enjoy the usual home cooked meal. Fish Platter as starter, 16oz Steak cooked to order with Onions, Mushroom and Baked Tomato served with Jacket Potato and sour cream, Salad and choice of Dressings .This was followed by a choice of several Ice Creams and Cheesecakes. Together with a glass of Chilled Grape Juice, all this on Gold Rimmed Crockery with proper cutlery. Jealous!

This was a better service than the F4 crews received on one flight between FI and Ascension. They had requested bite sized sandwiches, Mars Bars, apples and containers of drinks. After a few hours airborne the first box was opened and found to contain All the sandwiches. The other box on that aircraft had All the Mars Bars!! The other crew had all the apples and all the drinks!!

Still that was better than a subsequent Tornado F3 flight where the in flight meals contained Pot Noodles - our suggestions for a scource of fluids to use were not well received.

My best memory was when we had two VC10Ks operating over Northern Iraq with the entire RAF fast jet contingent. It was my 50th Birthday and the other crew had baked me a birthday cake, over Iraq on an operational mission. Thanks Rupe.

#27 Fareast driver ref Sepulot. I flew in to there in a Twin Pin in Dec 63. The resident company of the KOYLI had been on Stand To over night, and when one of the crews returned to their gun pit, after breakfast, they found a 15ft python in it which had probably been their all night. We had it for lunch!!

[BEagle]

I recall a trip in ROZ2 over Northern Iraq with Tengah Type navigating and his-excellency-the-future-mayor-of-Cartoontown as Air Eng. Between them they took it in turns to cook up the most superb meal of beef olives in the little galley after the FJs had left and we were waiting for them to return for their double dip 30 min later. That set the scene for future flights, so much so that the co-pilot and I had to plead just to have a sandwich or two later in the week after having dined on Basil's 'kangaroo flip-flop' and shrimp tava the previous evening!

[multum in parvo]

RAF Wyton,86-88, a catering officer that was not afraid to push out the boundaries. Stewards were taught to flambe a steak at the table and, during a FI detachment, a request for oak chippings so that smoked trout were delivered by return. Outstanding.

[Pontius Navigator]

RAF Cottesmore, 65, bit of a speaker clash between senior married and junior livers in with Mess social functions liver out orientated. In retaliation livers in started to go to dinner at the same time on Saturday nights and in DJs. It was informal but the staff to the occur and Saturday dinner was not to be missed.

PMC, very old school, turned up in sports jacket, thought he had got the dress code wrong and departed :)

[taxydual]

Leeming, early '80's. Green Dragon, Exelby. The local Fruit and Veg trader was bragging, to a 'new face' in the pub, of how he ripped of the RAF by supplying the cheapest and tattiest fruit and veg to the Station and charging full whack.

The 'new face' was the new Catering Officer.

Whoops.

[ShyTorque]

On arrival at our "SH force field location" (an old farm in Northern Germany) we were told that we would be living off "COMPO" all week (I think BAOR/RAFG stocks were coming up for their best before date). The army delivered said rations by the pallet full and quickly departed. To our "delight" it was all "Menu D".

Thankfully we had a very resourceful camp cook. On night two we had a lamb roast dinner - we didn't ask where it came from.

[Manandboy]

Marham 1984 - station still coming to terms with the new, fast and sparsely-crewed Tornado after many years of Victor catering. 27 Sqn deployment to Goose Bay (supported by Victors, of course). Ration boxes delivered to the sqn just before walk, not many crews opened them to check what was provided before setting off. At an appropriate time (after the second bracket), opened my box to discover a chicken leg wrapped in clingfilm(!) and half pint cardboard carton of orange squash - the kind you had to pull apart to open! All I wanted was a few mouthfuls, so had to land at Goose Bay with an open carton of OJ ballanced on the generator swithches - only way of keeping it level. Unsurprisingly, nobody managed the chicken legs! Explaining to the caterers about eating/drinking in fast-jet cockpits was fun! Loved the egg banjos and babies heads on exercise though!

[Pontius Navigator]

ManandBoy - oranges?

in earlier days of high light and high cabin altitude sandwiches were prepared bite size and fried foods and beans were not in the feeder menus, probably why there were separate aircrew feeders.

Feeding only QRA crews at weekends we could order what we liked - like chicken platter on a tray with two chickens and all the trimmings, or salmon in aspic, or birthday cakes etc.

[Onceapilot]

MandB, I never did get to understand the FJ lunchbox, e.g crumbly egg sarnies cut in triangles, lump of frozen chicken etc. I usually had a Mars bar or two in the ankle pockets! :ok:

OAP

[Tengah Type]

#78 BEagle. Thank you for your endorsement of my ( and the mayors ) culinarary skills. But you should have been on the States Trainer on the leg where Vascodegama was resposible for the catering. The Lobster Thermidor starter was excellent.

[Mickj3]

https://cimg4.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/650x911/1424562_10202366795912315_615899144_n_1__2f55e5a1e3778cb57f4 9dfb60ab3dabda2fc81da.jpg

Ah!!, the 10 man pack

[Wander00]

Thanks for sight of compo contents/menus - happy memories

Tengah, you mentioned presumably a nav who used the nom de plume Vasco de Gama. Many years ago, 1965 to be precise, when the RAF College tour to the US in 2 Britannias took place, our nav sent round route and progress up dates, signing each in the name of a different historic navigator, eg Vasco da Gama, John Cabot, etc. Wouldn't be the same guy would it

[Pontius Navigator]

Ah, the route progress map. Seemed to die out after the Brits. Or perhaps on our VC10 over Greenland the nav was too busy. We used the weather map from the Telegraph and made our own. We knew we were off track even if the nav didn't.

[orca]

I remember the fabulous WO from the equally fabulous VC10 crew that dragged us to Malaysia dolling out the packed meals at Al Dhafra before what was due to be a fairly emotional trip to Columbo - through the mighty ITCZ.
Luckily no room to stow a packed meal in the cockpit so we dutifully unpacked them - to find that the mainstay has an extra large ice cream. Obviously couldn’t come with us - cue surreal scene of six fellows in their aeroplanes, strapped in under the sun shelters having a much appreciated ice cream prior to APU start in a still dim Arabian dawn.

[MPN11]

Slightly off-piste, but I remember the OH being able to blag a 32 Sqn Andover to take the RAF Pistol Team to Jersey for a weekend match (well, she was OC Admin). Accordingly our motley crew of cpls and upward gather for the flight. It being a ‘training flight’, the cabin crew/Air Stewards accordingly do the full VIP bit for the X-Channel hops. The faces of some of the more junior members of the Team found themselves being served proper coffee in china cups and saucers, with accompanying Danish Pastries.

Oh, and we beat Jersey!! A lovely trip all round, and some very happy airmen!

[glad rag]

Tanker, IIRC the B52 was and maybe still is able to use an electric frying pan. There is reference to the actor Brigadier James Stewart accompanying a crew on a 13 hour sortie over Nam and the crew using one to supplement their rations. Apparently it was the tail gunners job to get the rations, bacon,eggs, cheese and bread.

If I may have your indulgence..

"Stewart's family on both sides had deep military roots, as both grandfathers had fought in the Civil War (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_Civil_War),[9] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-elt12-10) and his father had served during both the Spanish–American War (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spanish%E2%80%93American_War) and World War I (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_War_I). Stewart considered his father to be the biggest influence on his life, so it was not surprising that, when another war came, he too was willing to serve. Members of his family had previously been in the infantry, but Stewart chose to become a flier.[30] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-31)

An early interest in flying led Stewart to gain his private pilot certificate (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Private_Pilot_License) in 1935 and commercial pilot license (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Commercial_Pilot_Licence) in 1938. He often flew cross-country to visit his parents in Pennsylvania, navigating by the railroad tracks.[12] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-The_Jimmy_Stewart_Museum-13) Nearly two years before the December 1941 attack on Pearl Harbor (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attack_on_Pearl_Harbor), Stewart had accumulated over 400 hours of flying time.[31] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-32)

Considered a highly proficient pilot, he entered a cross-country race as a co-pilot in 1939.[32] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-33) Stewart, along with musician/composer Hoagy Carmichael (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hoagy_Carmichael), saw the need for trained war pilots, and joined with other Hollywood celebrities to invest in Thunderbird Field (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thunderbird_Field), a pilot-training school built and operated by Southwest Airways (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Southwest_Airways) in Glendale, Arizona (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glendale,_Arizona). This airfield became part of the United States Army Air Forces (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_Army_Air_Forces) training establishment and trained more than 10,000 pilots during World War II.[33] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-34)

In October 1940, Stewart was drafted into the United States Army (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_Army) but was rejected for failing to meet the weight requirements for his height for new recruits—Stewart was 5 pounds (2.3 kg) under the standard. To get up to 143 pounds (65 kg), he sought out the help of Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer's muscle man and trainer Don Loomis, who was noted for his ability to help people gain or lose weight in his studio gymnasium. Stewart subsequently attempted to enlist in the Air Corps (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_Army_Air_Corps), but still came in underweight, although he persuaded the enlistment officer to run new tests, this time passing the weigh-in,[34] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-Smith_p._30-35)
[N 2] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-36)with the result that Stewart enlisted and was inducted in the Army on March 22, 1941. He became the first major American movie star to wear a military uniform in World War II (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_War_II).[1] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-Munn-1)

Stewart enlisted as a private[12] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-The_Jimmy_Stewart_Museum-13)
[35] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-jcs-group-37) but applied for an Air Corps commission and Service Pilot (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Auxiliary_Pilot_Badge#Service_Pilot) rating as both a college graduate and a licensed commercial pilot. Soon to be 33, he was almost six years beyond the maximum age restriction for Aviation Cadet training, the normal path of commissioning for pilots, navigators and bombardiers. The now-obsolete auxiliary pilot ratings (Glider Pilot, Liaison Pilot and Service Pilot) differed from the Aviation Cadet Program in that a higher maximum age limit and corrected vision were allowed upon initial entry. Stewart received his commission as a second lieutenant on January 1, 1942,[36] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-38) shortly after the attack on Pearl Harbor, while a corporal at Moffett Field (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moffett_Field), California. He received his Service Pilot rating at that time, under the Service Pilot (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Auxiliary_Pilot_Badge) program established in March 1942 for experienced former civilian pilots. Although Service Pilots were normally restricted to noncombat flying, they were permitted to fly overseas on cargo and utility transports, typically with Air Transport, Ferry or Troop Carrier Commands. Under the regulations of the period, a Service Pilot could obtain an unrestricted Pilot rating after one year of USAAF service on flying status, provided he met certain flight experience requirements and passed an evaluation board, and some did in fact go on to combat flying assignments.[37] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-39) Stewart's first assignment was an appearance at a March of Dimes (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/March_of_Dimes) rally in Washington, D.C., but Stewart wanted assignment to an operational unit rather than serving as a recruiting symbol. He applied for and was granted advanced training on multi-engine aircraft. Stewart was posted to nearby Mather Field (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mather_Field) to instruct in both single- and twin-engine aircraft.[35] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-jcs-group-37)
[38] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-sm42-40)

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/7/7b/Winning_Your_Wings.ogv/220px-seek%3D963-Winning_Your_Wings.ogv.jpg
James Stewart in Winning Your Wings (1942)Public appearances by Stewart were limited engagements scheduled by the Army Air Forces. "Stewart appeared several times on network radio with Edgar Bergen (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edgar_Bergen)and Charlie McCarthy (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charlie_McCarthy). Shortly after Pearl Harbor, he performed with Orson Welles (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orson_Welles), Edward G. Robinson (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edward_G._Robinson), Walter Huston (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Walter_Huston) and Lionel Barrymore (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lionel_Barrymore) in an all-network radio program called We Hold These Truths, dedicated to the 150th anniversary of the Bill of Rights."[39] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-41) In early 1942, Stewart was asked to appear in a film to help recruit the 100,000 airmen the USAAF anticipated it would need to win the war. The USAAF's First Motion Picture Unit (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/First_Motion_Picture_Unit) shot scenes of Lieutenant Stewart in his pilot's flight jacket (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A-2_jacket) and recorded his voice for narration. The short recruitment film Winning Your Wings (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Winning_Your_Wings) appeared in movie theaters nationwide beginning in late May and was very successful, resulting in 150,000 new recruits.[40] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-42)
[41] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-43)

Stewart was concerned that his expertise and celebrity status would relegate him to instructor duties "behind the lines".[42] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-44) His fears were confirmed when, after his promotion to first lieutenant on July 7, 1942,[43] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-sm273-45) he was stationed from August to December 1942 at Kirtland Army Airfield (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kirtland_Air_Force_Base) in Albuquerque, New Mexico (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Albuquerque,_New_Mexico), piloting AT-11 Kansans (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beechcraft_Model_18) used in training bombardiers. He was transferred to Hobbs Army Airfield (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hobbs_Army_Airfield), New Mexico, for three months of transition training in the four-engine B-17 Flying Fortress (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/B-17_Flying_Fortress), then sent to the Combat Crew Processing Center in Salt Lake City (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Salt_Lake_City), where he expected to be assigned to a combat unit. Instead, he was assigned in early 1943 to an operational training unit, the 29th Bombardment Group (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/29th_Flying_Training_Wing) at Gowen Field (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boise_Airport#Gowen_Field), Boise, Idaho (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boise,_Idaho), as an instructor.[35] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-jcs-group-37) He was promoted to captain on July 9, 1943,[43] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-sm273-45)and appointed a squadron commander.[38] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-sm42-40) To Stewart, now 35, combat duty seemed far away and unreachable, and he had no clear plans for the future. However, a rumor that Stewart would be taken off flying status and assigned to making training films or selling bonds called for immediate action, because what he dreaded most was "the hope-shattering spectre of a dead end".[44] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-46) Stewart appealed to his commander, 30-year-old Lt. Col. Walter E. Arnold Jr., who understood his situation and recommended Stewart to the commander of the 445th Bombardment Group (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/445th_Bombardment_Group), a B-24 Liberator (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Consolidated_B-24_Liberator) unit that had just completed initial training at Gowen Field and gone on to final training at Sioux City Army Air Base, Iowa (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sioux_Gateway_Airport).[45] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-sm43-47)
[N 3] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-49)

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/f/f4/Maj._Jimmy_Stewart.jpg/220px-Maj._Jimmy_Stewart.jpg (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Maj._Jimmy_Stewart.jpg)
Major Jimmy Stewart in 1943In August 1943, Stewart was assigned to the 445th Bomb Group as operations officer of the 703d Bombardment Squadron (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/703d_Bombardment_Squadron), but after three weeks became its commander. On October 12, 1943, judged ready to go overseas, the 445th Bomb Group staged to Lincoln Army Airfield (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lincoln_Army_Airfield), Nebraska. Flying individually, the aircraft first flew to Morrison Army Airfield (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Palm_Beach_Air_Force_Base), Florida, and then on the circuitous Southern Route (https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=South_Atlantic_air_ferry_route_in_World_War_ II&action=edit&redlink=1) along the coasts of South America and Africa to RAF Tibenham (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/RAF_Tibenham), Norfolk (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Norfolk), England (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/England). After several weeks of training missions, in which Stewart flew with most of his combat crews, the group flew its first combat mission on December 13, 1943, to bomb the U-boat (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/U-boat) facilities at Kiel (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kiel), Germany (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Germany), followed three days later by a mission to Bremen (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bremen). Stewart led the high squadron of the group formation on the first mission, and the entire group on the second.[47] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-sm44-50) Following a mission to Ludwigshafen (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ludwigshafen), Germany, on January 7, 1944, Stewart was promoted to major.[47] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-sm44-50)
[N 4] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-52) Stewart was awarded the Distinguished Flying Cross (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Distinguished_Flying_Cross_(United_States)) for actions as deputy commander of the 2nd Combat Bombardment Wing (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2d_Bombardment_Wing_(World_War_II)) on the first day of "Big Week (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Big_Week)" operations in February and flew two other missions that week.[49] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-sm45-53)

On March 22, 1944, Stewart flew his 12th combat mission, leading the 2nd Bomb Wing in an attack on Berlin (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Berlin). On March 30, 1944, he was sent to RAF Old Buckenham (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/RAF_Old_Buckenham) to become group operations officer of the 453rd Bombardment Group (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/453rd_Bombardment_Group), a new B-24 unit that had just lost both its commander and operations officer on missions.[50] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-sm4546-54) To inspire the unit, Stewart flew as command pilot in the lead B-24 on several missions deep into Nazi-occupied Europe. As a staff officer, Stewart was assigned to the 453rd "for the duration" and thus not subject to a quota of missions of a combat tour. He nevertheless assigned himself as a combat crewman on the group's missions until his promotion to lieutenant colonel on June 3[43] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-sm273-45) and reassignment on July 1, 1944, to the 2nd Bomb Wing, assigned as executive officer (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Executive_officer) to Brigadier General Edward J. Timberlake. His official tally of mission credits while assigned to the 445th and 453rd Bomb Groups was 20 sorties.

Stewart continued to go on missions uncredited, flying with the pathfinder (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pathfinder_(RAF)) squadron of the 389th Bombardment Group (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/389th_Bombardment_Group), with his two former groups and with groups of the 20th Combat Bomb Wing (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/20th_Bombardment_Wing_(World_War_II)).[51] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-sm4647-55) He received a second award of the Distinguished Flying Cross for actions in combat and was awarded the French Croix de Guerre (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Croix_de_guerre_1939%E2%80%931945). He also was awarded the Air Medal (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Air_Medal) with three oak leaf clusters (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oak_leaf_cluster).

Stewart served in a number of staff positions in the 2nd and 20th Bomb Wings between July 1944 and the end of the war in Europe, and was promoted to full colonel on March 29, 1945.[43] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-sm273-45)
[52] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-56) Less than two months later, on May 10, he succeeded to command briefly the 2nd Bomb Wing, a position he held until June 15, 1945.[53] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-57) Stewart was one of the few Americans to ever rise from private to colonel in only four years during the Second World War.[12] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-The_Jimmy_Stewart_Museum-13)
[35] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-jcs-group-37)

At the beginning of June 1945, Stewart was the presiding officer of the court-martial (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Court-martial) of a pilot and navigator who were charged with dereliction of duty for having accidentally bombed the Swiss city of Zurich (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bombings_of_Switzerland_in_World_War_II#Zurich_and_Basel)the previous March—the first instance of U.S. personnel being tried for an attack on a neutral country. The court acquitted the defendants.[54] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-58)

Stewart returned to the United States aboard RMS Queen Elizabeth (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/RMS_Queen_Elizabeth), arriving in New York City on 31 August 1945.[55] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-59)

Stewart continued to play a role in the Army Air Forces Reserve following World War II and the new United States Air Force Reserve (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Air_Force_Reserve_Command) after the official establishment of the Air Force (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_Air_Force) as an independent service in 1947.

Stewart received permanent promotion to colonel in 1953 and served as Air Force Reserve commander of Dobbins Air Force Base (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dobbins_Air_Reserve_Base), Georgia, the present day Dobbins Air Reserve Base (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dobbins_Air_Reserve_Base).[43] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-sm273-45)
[56] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-60) He was also one of the 12 founders and a charter member of the Air Force Association (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Air_Force_Association) in October 1945. Stewart rarely spoke about his wartime service, but did appear in January 1974 in an episode of the TV series The World At War (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_World_At_War), "Whirlwind: Bombing Germany (September 1939 – April 1944)", commenting on the disastrous mission of October 14, 1943 (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Second_Raid_on_Schweinfurt), against Schweinfurt (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schweinfurt), Germany. At his request, he was identified only as "James Stewart, Squadron Commander" in the documentary.[57] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-61)
[58] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-62)

On July 23, 1959, Stewart was promoted to brigadier general (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brigadier_general_(United_States)). During his active duty periods, he remained current as a pilot of Convair B-36 Peacemaker (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Convair_B-36_Peacemaker), Boeing B-47 Stratojet (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boeing_B-47_Stratojet) and Boeing B-52 Stratofortress (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boeing_B-52_Stratofortress) intercontinental bombers of the Strategic Air Command (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strategic_Air_Command).[59] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-C4WDefault-1979280-63) On February 20, 1966, Brigadier General Stewart flew as a non-duty observer in a B-52 on an Arc Light (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Arc_Light) bombing mission during the Vietnam War (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vietnam_War). He refused the release of any publicity regarding his participation, as he did not want it treated as a stunt, but as part of his job as an officer in the Air Force Reserve.

Stewart, however, often did his part in publicizing and promoting military service in general and the United States Air Force in particular. In 1963, for example, as part of the plot in an episode of the popular television sitcom (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Situation_comedy) My Three Sons (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/My_Three_Sons), Stewart appeared as himself in his brigadier-general's uniform to address high-school students about the importance of science in society and about the many accomplishments of the select group of so-called "eggheads" being educated at the United States Air Force Academy (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_Air_Force_Academy) in Colorado Springs (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Colorado_Springs,_Colorado).[60] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-64) Five years later, after 27 years of service, Stewart officially retired from the Air Force on May 31, 1968.[61] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-65) Stewart received a number of awards during his military service and upon his retirement was also awarded the United States Air Force Distinguished Service Medal. On May 23, 1985, President Ronald Reagan awarded Stewart the Presidential Medal of Freedom and promoted him to Major General on the Retired List.[62] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#cite_note-66)REF https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stewart#Military_service

[MPN11]

Actually, a thoroughly good chap. :ok:

[Tengah Type]

WanderOO #88 Different chap. Ours would have been at Primary School then.
Route Maps were still being used on 10 Sqn in 1983. I do not know when the practice stopped. Probably when the stock of maps ran out and nobody would authorise a new buy.

[Big Pistons Forever]

Small ship pitches up in a coastal Canadian town ( location unspecified to protect the guilty, me). Mail is waiting and included a sternly worded missive from the Senior Staff Officer Naval Supply. It notes that ships have been purchasing high end sea food products resulting in the exceedence of mandated daily maximum food costs per head. Just as I am reading this there is s knock on my cabin door, it’s the Chief Cook.

He says there is a local boat alongside with a fresh haul of scallops, and would we like to buy any. Absolutely I say, buy enough for a good dinner for everyone, just make sure you get a receipt that says, “fish, 2 nd grade quality”

A magnificent scallop dinner was enjoyed by all !

[BEagle]

Tengah Type, possibly the worst 101 trolley tart was 'Bunter'. He starred on one trip by plonking down a cup of tea on Tony Binn's chart and log, slopping much of it over said documents. Then handed the Captain a brimming cup, which he spilled over his hand... "Get this idiot off the flight deck!", came the plaintive cry from the Captain.

On another trip we'd been diverted to Lincoln, Nebraska. Where, as you will no doubt recall, huge corn-fed beef steak is readily available. So impressed was Bunter with the steaks he acquired, that he forgot to buy anything else for the trip up to Goose!

'Route Progess' charts seemed to have died out in my final years on the VC10. However, I'd kept half-a-dozen or so, thus when I flew a Gp Capt back from Cranwell to pre-pongo Abingdon, I handed him one at around Cottesmore, showing our route progress on the standard chart! He did at least see the funny side!

[Cornish Jack]

Back in the 50s, the days of Transport Command, 'lunch boxes' were the order of the day. 'Authority' decided that these were to be discontinued in favour of 'dry rations' i.e. tins of comestibles and loaves of bread etc. Unfortunately, as is the way with 'Authority', this change was introduced without briefing the crews. Thus it was that pre-flighting our Valetta for the Riyan, Salalah, Sharjah, with a load of hungry 'pongos', I found a HUGE tin of ham, half a dozen loaves of weevil ridden bread, several tins of Heinz mixed salad 'goop' and NO tin opener, NO knives of any sort and, of course no plates or cutlery. As Siggy/Pilot Assistant/ dogsbody etc. it fell to me to sort this lot out. Pongos have bayonets, so bread knife sorted. bayonets can stab tins, so tin opener sorted. Result was 'doorsteps' of enormous and irregular construction which were gratefully received by our pax but equally gratefully declined by Skipper and Nav and self! An aircraft which has catering facilties limited to a Type 52 resistance which could heat a can of soup in 45 minutes is not best suited to 'dry rations'!
Later, on the sumptuously appointed Beverley, (ONE water boiler!) our 'AQMs' (some, at least) could manufacture remarkable meals. One such was served , in the freight bay, seated at table, courtesy of a load of furniture being returned to UK. "Just popping downstairs for lunch" the call of gentlemen aviators!:ok:

[Pontius Navigator]

Shades of Sunderlands which had a wardroom, so did the Shackleton but the Nimrod had to make do with a galley.

[radar101]

Shades of Sunderlands which had a wardroom, so did the Shackleton but the Nimrod had to make do with a galley.

Does that imply that the other ranks were not allowed in? Did they have their own messdeck?

[MPN11]

My late Father-in-Law was a Sunderland Navigator/Chef of some repute, apparently.

[5aday]

During the squabble between Mintoff and Carrington in the early 70's about the Nimrods using Luqa airfield. my crew were the first to fly out of Malta and land at Sigonella. Several days ensued whilst a commcen was established at Sigonella (initially using the aeroplane and then in a big green tent) and we were billeted in the Central Palace in Catania. Natural curiosity led to familiarity with the P3 crews based in Sig and quite a few of the Americans were keen to find out what the inside of the Nimrod was really capable of. This preamble has a catering angle - our brass had made arrangements for lunch boxes from Alitalia in Catania Fontanarossa and these were duly delivered to Sig. Witnness - one thin turkey crustless dried out sandwich, and angel cake (similarly dessicated) a strange italian biscuit and a small bottle of cheapo vino.

For a nine hour sortie ? Really.

Luckily the knockers and our newly found american friends who were coming on the first Nimrod flight with Sig as a base had a pre flight breakfast meal in the Flight Diner followed by a post flight Steak and anything else you wanted. The cost : Free for enlisted men and after further enquiries one dollar each for Officers. We had a really good crew so I told the officers on our crew (only)about this facility. Unfortunately the facility was slightly spoiled when the word got out and people came to work in the morning at Sig bringing their overalls and pretending they were going to the Pre Flight Diner and operating that day, even though they were not flying that week.
The Italian Lunch boxes did continue for a week or so until the bills arrived, I think they were the equivalent of £18 per box and if you wanted tea or instant coffee it was extra.

[PPRuNeUser0139]

Shades of Sunderlands which had a wardroom, so did the Shackleton but the Nimrod had to make do with a galley.
I can't speak for Maritime Shacks - but there was nothing on the AEW Shack that could remotely be described as a 'wardroom'. While I was there ('74-'81), the crews were all officer, save for the Flight Engineer position which was filled either by an officer or, more usually, a Master or an NCO.

[5aday]

I saw the galley on the Sunderland at the RAF Museum and beliive me, the designer of the Nimrod Galley still had a lot to
learn. Whenever we carried flyaway ground crew, the only place to sit was in the 4 place galley or on the extra Dinghy over the spar.
so if you were part of the operating crew, when your meal was ready, you ate it at your position. One flight out of Masirah, the ground crew tried to
help by dishing out the starters, (Crayfish Salad) and there were boxes of crayfish, boxes of salad, and boxes of tubs of dressing. The six boxes of crayfish were devoured by the groundcrew, and the rest of us had salad and dressing. On another escapade, one of the groundcrew put some tins of soup in the oven.
Unopened. Don't ever let them near the Rima Grill. The next thing you would have was an underfloor fire / smoke warning.

[NutLoose]

One flight out of Masirah, the ground crew tried to
help by dishing out the starters, (Crayfish Salad) and there were boxes of crayfish, boxes of salad, and boxes of tubs of dressing. The six boxes of crayfish were devoured by the groundcrew and the rest of us had salad and dressing.

That just gives us groundcrew a bad name, what on earth were they thinking, fancy putting the dressing on your salad and not on the crayfish... Shame on them.

[Pontius Navigator]

I can't speak for Maritime Shacks - but there was nothing on the AEW Shack that could remotely be described as a 'wardroom'. While I was there ('74-'81), the crews were all officer, save for the Flight Engineer position which was filled either by an officer or, more usually, a Master or an NCO.
You obviously did not spend enough time in the galley. The double bench seat and drop down table had Wardroom above them.

[Innominate]

Going back to the Sunderland, I was told by the late Gp Capt Jasper Coates, who during the war had commanded 120 Sqn and the Sunderland Operational Training Unit at Alness, that many Sunderland air gunners failed the course because they couldn't cook.

[NutLoose]

Deci, Sqn arrives and promptly struck down by the squirts... Turns out a lump of roast chicken was found festering under the water bottle in the block when it was changed. Sqn leaving suspected, but 17 shall remain nameless....ohhh err.
Gets up needing a drink of water at gawd knows what time, bimbles down the hall in the dark, takes cup and fills it, downs in one to quench my thirst, and nearly throws it back up as someone has emptied the bottle and filled it with Deci Red to keep it chilled.

[NutLoose]

Pre RAF this one... School cruise around the Med, 1st meal at sea, Steak and kidney pie, roasties and peas, covered with lashings of thick gravy....... takes a mouthful to discover the gravy is chocolate sauce, look forlornly at my lovely sponge cake covered in chocolate sauce and our worst fears are realised.

[PPRuNeUser0139]

You obviously did not spend enough time in the galley. The double bench seat and drop down table had Wardroom above them.
Written in chinagraph? Think you're mistaken.. that area was never called the Wardroom (and I served my time in the galley!)
Perhaps Wensleydale could throw his £0.02-worth in.. (no stranger to the galley he!)

[Pontius Navigator]

Written in chinagraph? Think you're mistaken.. that area was never called the Wardroom (and I served my time in the galley!)
Perhaps Wensleydale could throw his £0.02-worth in.. (no stranger to the galley he!)
Definitely not chinagraph but properly produced label.

[Pontius Navigator]

Nutty, South Cerney, lunch food served, we all filed past the serving line collecting spud, veg and steak & pigmy, topped of with a ladle of rhubarb sauce.

[Tengah Type]

Operation Deny Flight saw half of 101 Sqn deploy to Sigonella, the other half of the Squadron was already deployed to either Incirlik or Bahrain. The Sqn Cdr obtained a very good rate for the detachment at the Sheraton Catania with everybody on Daily Messing Rates. After about a week a team from Command Accounts arrived to assess the situation. They negotiated "cheaper" rates at other hotels, which would have split the Det, with all the Comms and Transport problems that entailed. Until it was pointed out that we were paying less than that anyway!
They then organised that all 3 meals would be taken in the hotel, so no need to pay DMR, saving money. Only problem was that the Det was working irregular hours over a 24 hr period and hotel working normal hours. Day shift left the hotel several hours ahead of normal Breakfast time and hotel could make no provision. They were then reimbursed for the cost of Breakfast at the McDonalds on base. The night shift returned well before Breakfast time, so "relaxed" in their rooms until arriving at Breakfast in a very "relaxed" state to the chagrin of the normal paying guests. Breakfast took about two hours to serve and eat. They slept through lunch and then left the hotel before Dinner - more actuals.
The Dinner meal could consist of an icecream scoop of Calamari for starter, a slice of cold ham and a ring of tomato for main, followed by a 2 inch square 1/2 inch thick slice of gateaux for sweet. Wine was not included, but there was no limit on soft drinks. To give some quantity to the meal vast amounts of bread were eaten and lots of Coke was drunk
( Hip Flasks may have been used). Three Cokes were about the price of a bottle of wine, we drank about 6 Cokes each. With 30 people arriving at the same time the waiting staff could not cope and Dinner took two hours. Also there was no provision for, the Vegetarians or those with allergies. They dined elsewhere on actuals.
The result we lost money, the hotel lost money, the waiters received no tips and the RAF paid a lot more!! They probably got MBEs for their work!!

[Wensleydale]

Perhaps Wensleydale could throw his £0.02-worth in.. (no stranger to the galley he!)

Ah yes. From scratch (and the odd tin): Bacon, Sausage, Eggs, Tomatoes and mushrooms for the whole crew served 20 minutes after take-off! Bacon rolled into curls and placed fat upwards in a tin tray (Save the fat for roasted tinned potatoes later in the flight). Sausages baked in butter in a tin tray (Compo Sausages if available - if not, fresh). Eggs in a paper cup in the oven (or poached in the cup with water from the boiler if the oven was too full). Tinned mushrooms baked in butter in the oven and tinned tomatoes warmed through in the oven. The oven had six shelves and two tin trays fitted on each shelf (but bear in mind that the more food in the oven then the less hot air and the food took longer) Never mind how good (or bad) you were at weapons control or voicetel - cook a good meal for the crew and you are in!! (Tell that to the FC branch with all their pre-prepared warm in the oven food in the E-3)!

I must confess that I do not remember the Wardroom label either. I wonder if the Coventry Shack has one?

[Wensleydale]

As an adjunct to my post about cooking in the Shack.... I seem to remember that not long after the E-3 came into service, some chump decided that the galley slave could no longer cook for the whole crew unless he/she had completed a catering food handling course. This resulted in the pre-packed warm through TV dinners produced by inflight rather than raw rations. Later on, the food handling course reared its ugly head again, but the argument that each crew member was responsible for cooking their own meal defeated the notion once more. This still didn't stop some of the Sentry's airborne technicians producing some excellent steaks etc from raw rations for the crew when deployed on operations and the crew busy coordinating the war.

[Pontius Navigator]

WD, you missed a treat. My daughter ran the food handling courses. Remember, the essence ingredient is good ☺.

She did one of the food hygiene courses and came home resolved to buy a new fridge ☺, but resisted the urge.

Had Captain Mac pushed hard at the outset you might have had a couple of flight attendants add to the E3D!

[Ogre]

Natural curiosity led to familiarity with the P3 crews based in Sig and quite a few of the Americans were keen to find out what the inside of the Nimrod was really capable of.

Slight tangent, but there is the apocryphal story of the Nimrod crossing the Atlantic and was met by a USAF F16. The F16 pilot was keen to show off what his little fighter could do so set off on a series of aerobatics around the Nimrod. After a few minutes he pulled up alongside the mighty hunter and radiod across "Bet you can't do that". The Nimrod pilot agreed but then said "Bet you can't do this". The F16 kept pace with the Nimrod for a few minutes with nothing outwardly apparent happening, before the Nimrod pilot came back on the air and said "So can you do that?

"What did you do?" asked the F16 pilot

"Went down the back, had a sh!t and a steak sandwich" replied the Nimrod pilot.

F16 leaves at speed and in the huff...

[Pontius Navigator]

Ogre, similar to the Tanker "munch, munch" story.

[Wensleydale]

Slight tangent, but there is the apocryphal story of the Nimrod crossing the Atlantic and was met by a USAF F16

On another similar tangent....a Shackleton was sent to Cyprus to support an F4 APC training det, and one of the female ATC controllers was taken along for a flight on one of the sorties. She was sitting in the co-pilot's seat when one of the F4s asked if he could formate on the Shackleton for a photo-op after his serial (The Shack carried a nice big camera). As the F4 came up, the captain asked the passenger if she would like to take off her helmet and fluff out her long bond hair for the F4 crew. "I can do better than that" she said, unzipping her flying suit...….. I understand that there were a good few formation requests after that. (Story courtesy of the late and sadly missed Beery).

[ian16th]

Pre RAF this one... School cruise around the Med, 1st meal at sea, Steak and kidney pie, roasties and peas, covered with lashings of thick gravy....... takes a mouthful to discover the gravy is chocolate sauce, look forlornly at my lovely sponge cake covered in chocolate sauce and our worst fears are realised.

Very early days as a Boy Entrant at Yatesbury.
I put white sauce on my cauliflower, like my mum used to do.

It was Rice Pudding!

[NutLoose]

The Sqn Armourers at Bruggen were a sight to behold, the first armourer would plate up his lunch, roast beef and custard, with apple tart and curry and pass that to the man behind him, this went down the line until the last man would pass his selection to the first, they would then sit down and eat some of the worst concoctions imaginable.

Strange lot, they used to have one of those thick Starsky and Hutch woollen jumpers like this below and when off shift they would pick one of their number to wear it all day, he would then pick the next days person, you would be sitting on the beach or walking around Deci and the armourers would wander past in shorts and teeshirts etc, all except one of them who would be sweltering wearing one of those heavy knit jumpers done up, they used to get some strange stares downtown Cags

https://i.ebayimg.com/images/g/sowAAOSw0HVWEikV/s-l300.jpg

[longer ron]

As the F4 came up, the captain asked the passenger if she would like to take off her helmet and fluff out her long bond hair for the F4 crew. "I can do better than that" she said, unzipping her flying suit...….. I understand that there were a good few formation requests after that. (Story courtesy of the late and sadly missed Beery).

Nice one :)
Many years ago I was flying Grob Twin Astir with my then GF in the back seat,as we were thermalling I had the impression that the other gliders were flying a little closer than usual,I looked round and discovered GF had undone her shirt and was not wearing a bra,well she did like the sun :)