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rans6andrew
31st Jan 2018, 21:24
my partner has more than her fair share of unwanted phone calls but feels obliged to answer un-known numbers calling her as many are work related.

She has taken to winding them up but the results are often surprising. Yesterday she picked up the phone and I heard her say "yes" and then a few seconds later "I have a man who looks after that sort of thing". Then she looked at the handset in disbelief and hung up the call. The second question she had been asked was "are you responsible for paying the bills?" (Gas and/or Electricity!) Apparently the answer that she has a man who looks after that sort of thing didn't fit any of the responses that the caller's script could cope with.

Has anyone else found a way to get rid of these callers quickly without telling them what you really think of them?

Rans6.......

Fareastdriver
31st Jan 2018, 21:29
Quite often you can tell by a long silence when you answer the call. This is because their auto dialling is ringing several numbers at once and it takes time for the operator to ascertain which of the numbers has been answered.

This is a gimme for a nuisance call so I hang up before they come on line.

VP959
31st Jan 2018, 21:46
What I'd like to know is two things.

How can these companies get away with calling people who have opted out of all telephone marketing and on the TPS?

How can they spoof caller display numbers so that an overseas call appears to be coming from the UK, and is there an easy way to stop this?

The reason I ask is that I get a call every day of the week, around midday, from the same "UK" (supposedly Southampton area code) number, that is some sort of overseas pharmacy trying to sell drugs. I now just ignore any call received around this time every day, and let it go to the answering machine (but they never leave a message). 1471 reports the same "Southampton" phone number whenever I've bothered to check.

I can't be bothered to play games with them, and the screening devices available all seem both expensive and a bit of a nuisance for genuine callers who are trying to get through.

longer ron
31st Jan 2018, 21:55
Not quite the same type of call as the OP refers to but long before the internet I had advertised my old Jago Jeep in what I thought was quite a local 'exchange and mart' type publication,publication date thursday.
So fast fwd to 0600hrs on thursday morning my phone rang (beside bed) and I woke and answered - the caller had a Lahndahn accent - he was asking about the jeep and I said to him 'kinda early innit ?' to which he replied 'not really' LOL.
Anyway I would have been getting up at 0630 and decided to have some fun,I just kept him talking - he was trying to find out where I lived,when I remarked that I would be at work he said 'well leave the jeep outside and I will have a look,if I like it I will leave a deposit up the tailpipe' - however there was no way I was going to tell him any details.I kept him talking for at least 15 mins and eventually he said ''don't you want to sell it ? '' to which I replied '' not to you - no'' :)
That got him swearing at me - result :)
He rang off saying that I would be getting other calls - I just said 'I don't think so'
I then unplugged the phone and left it unplugged until friday night when I started to get local calls,jeep sold to a dodgy local chap for cash !

longer ron
31st Jan 2018, 21:57
I can't be bothered to play games with them, and the screening devices available all seem both expensive and a bit of a nuisance for genuine callers who are trying to get through.

We just leave our ansaphone on,we will pick up if we want to answer.
If we miss any important calls there are other contact options these days.

G-CPTN
31st Jan 2018, 22:05
I made the mistake of taking the challenge to string-out a caller asking 'lifestyle' questions - what make of television, what make of washing machine, who is your utility provider and a host of other questions.
I answered all untruthfully, but now I am getting follow-up calls trying to sell me appliances and services.

Pontius Navigator
31st Jan 2018, 22:13
Had one call, the exchange was the nearby town. I asked him where he was calling from - West Yorkshire - good try, except Boston Spa is in Yorkshire and Boston is in Lincs.

Or another call from TalkTalk. I asked the CEOs name - Adam Smith she said WRONG. Next call there was a pause and then the corect name. I then asked what her title was. Silence. Dido was amused.

M.Mouse
31st Jan 2018, 22:16
How can they spoof caller display numbers so that an overseas call appears to be coming from the UK, and is there an easy way to stop this?

If you have a digital telephone system, which most companies with a number of emloyers do, the calls are routed from the desk telephone via the local ethernet network to the digital telephone service router. The router is effectively a mini computer which routes the calls into the public network via a broadband or previously via an ISDN connection or two. So instead of the system the home subscriber uses of analogue signals being sent down the copper wires the telepone call is all digital. It is simple to program the router to transmit a particular Caller ID number, in fact it is what most systems are programmed to do so that the person being called only has e.g. the main switchboard number!

All the above is very simplified. I was peripherally involved with a company belonging to a friend of mine when I used to help with telephone systems installation, maintenance and alterations if I wasn't busy. It is quite interesting stuff but one thing I did learn that it is staggeringly easy to manipulate a telephone system once you gain access to the router. Many companies find out to there cost that there systems have been hacked and they only notice upon receipt of bills for hours of calls often to premium numbers of faraway countries!

Gertrude the Wombat
31st Jan 2018, 22:20
Quite often you can tell by a long silence when you answer the call. This is because their auto dialling is ringing several numbers at once and it takes time for the operator to ascertain which of the numbers has been answered.
The robot dials the calls. If a punter answers, the robot then looks for a free agent and connects them. A completely silent call might be when the robot over-enthusiastically dials too many calls (it has to dial more calls at once than there are agents, because not all punters answer their phones and you can't afford to have agents sitting around doing nothing waiting for more than a couple of seconds for the next call to come in).

You can set up such a system yourself with a few days' work (or a few hours' if you don't mind a pretty crap result): all you need is a web server and a PAYG Twilio account, starts at $20.

Sallyann1234
31st Jan 2018, 22:26
I can't be bothered to play games with them, and the screening devices available all seem both expensive and a bit of a nuisance for genuine callers who are trying to get through.
http://www.truecall.co.uk/ works well for me.

It has a number of ways to filter out rubbish calls without holding up important business and personal calls. No fuss - it just works.

Jetstream67
31st Jan 2018, 22:50
The reasons are

TPS only applies to UK calls (yes this is indeed stupid)

International delivery traffic still earns very good money for BT (ditto Junk mail via letterbox for Royal Mail)

People actually give their money to these callers (or they would give up)

Many callers use changing random numbers (easy to do ) so blocking is getting harder

No immediate hope of anything changing

obgraham
31st Jan 2018, 22:55
Being retired and all, and a nerdy sort in addition, I sometimes enjoy winding these guys up. I've been disappointed when they turned to computerized voices, or to requiring me to phone them back before they send the IRS out to arrest me.

So yesterday I was tickled to get the old "Hello this is technical department about your windows computer". Hadn't had them in almost a year.

I made the mistake of being nasty too soon: "Are you guys still pulling that old scam job these days?" To which I got an immediate "Yes we are, you fu**ing idiot" and an immediate hangup.

Where was the fun in that?

Gertrude the Wombat
31st Jan 2018, 22:57
http://www.truecall.co.uk/ works well for me.
Are there people who still have landlines?

G-CPTN
31st Jan 2018, 22:59
I keep a log of calls received.
Whilst there are some repeated numbers (if, for example, I didn't take the initial call(s), they might try again), however there are other calls which, whilst being from the same source, will have different numbers - either the same supposed exchange with 'sequential' numbers or radically different improbable numbers (often with too many digits or non-existing exchange numbers).


One of my ploys is to keep repeating yes - which throws them when they ask multiple choice questions (such as do you own your house or rent it and, are you aged 60 to 69 or 70 to 79?).
The idiots don't have the wit to separate the questions as they are working from a script).
Usually they get the message that they are dealing with an imbecile and then they get abusive and swear before ringing off.

Occasionally I can string them along, wasting their time and preventing them from bothering other people.

One source has been calling for more than ten years (they have my previous address and a distortion of my name).

seafire6b
31st Jan 2018, 23:00
Precisely the same as Sallyann1234 said. Every few days I have great pleasure in reviewing all those unknown callers who were unable to speak with me!

ExSp33db1rd
31st Jan 2018, 23:22
Are there people who still have landlines?

Yes.

567891

Gertrude the Wombat
31st Jan 2018, 23:47
Yes.
We got rid of ours when we discovered that

(1) we made no outgoing landline calls, because mobile calls were cheaper, and

(2) all incoming calls except for those from one elderly relative were junk

so we were paying vast amounts in line rental in order to receive about one non-junk call per week.

G-CPTN
31st Jan 2018, 23:49
We got rid of ours when we discovered that

(1) we made no outgoing landline calls, because mobile calls were cheaper, and

(2) all incoming calls except for those from one elderly relative were junk

so we were paying vast amounts in line rental in order to receive about one non-junk call per week.

How do you manage broadband without a landline?

lomapaseo
1st Feb 2018, 00:15
Quite often you can tell by a long silence when you answer the call. This is because their auto dialling is ringing several numbers at once and it takes time for the operator to ascertain which of the numbers has been answered.

This is a gimme for a nuisance call so I hang up before they come on line.

I listen for any signs of life. Most enjoyable ones are "hello are you there ???"

to which I reply "No" and hang up.

If I hear nothing after several seconds I rap the phone on the desk several times and hang up.

I have no idea what this does to a robo-call but it pizzez off my doctors offices

IFMU
1st Feb 2018, 00:22
I usually ask them, in my normal voice, if they can call back when my mommy is home.

visibility3miles
1st Feb 2018, 00:47
How can these companies get away with calling people who have opted out of all telephone marketing and on the TPS?

It's illegal, and they are probably spoofing somebody else's number so you can't track them down.

Gordy
1st Feb 2018, 00:50
How do deal the best:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-7OgWcwgB50

HyFlyer
1st Feb 2018, 02:18
It can be amusing....if I'm in the mood.....

1) answer in a normal voice, but gradually talk quieter and quieter..........they'll maybe raise the volume their end....do that for a good minute or so, and if they ask if there's a problem say no...you hear them perfect.
Then when you're nicely established in a conversation scream obscenities at them loudly and tell them to F off....I try to make it as offensive as possible.....

2) if they're offering double glazing or somesuch...then marvellous. They have my addres....I play alomng so they can visit......and have done this several times..but now these calls have dropped off.....surprisingly.
When they send somebody round, usally after three or four calls to confirm the meeting I tell the person who arrives to F OFF and stop calling.
They are usually upset at the waste of time...at which point laughing and calling them gormless and to STOP CALLING as I'll do it again......usually get's a response. I also take a photograph of them....and their van.
I figure they waste my time and my time is $$ so I'll waste theirs...and it seems to work.

3) appear virtually sensible, but then drift off into long winded explanations and secondary questions...just waste their time, but be positive. Eventually they click.....that you're totally winding them up....the key is to tell them to F off at just that moment before the sign off, when they know they've been duped. Sporting.

IBMJunkman
1st Feb 2018, 02:40
I have something like Truecall called NoMoRobo. Your phone service has to support Simultaneous Ring which allows you to specify a 2nd phone number to ring when you get a call.

They use the CallerID to look the number up in a database of previously reported numbers. If found it hangs up. Your phone rings only once.

Otherwise I let the answering machine take the call. If no message is left I report the number to NoMoRobo.

And last but not least if I actually pick up a call and it is a telemarketer I just hang up. They interrupted my life. I donít have to be civil. And I report the number to NoMoRobo.

Alsacienne
1st Feb 2018, 07:11
Try answering the phone as your local police station and advise them that their call is being recorded and their number logged ....

Krystal n chips
1st Feb 2018, 07:28
when I started to get local calls,jeep sold to a dodgy local chap for cash !

Ah, so you sold it to your local GSA club then ;) :E

VP959
1st Feb 2018, 07:33
http://www.truecall.co.uk/ works well for me.

It has a number of ways to filter out rubbish calls without holding up important business and personal calls. No fuss - it just works.

Thanks, I'll take a look at it.

Are there people who still have landlines?


Yes, those of us that live in rural areas with no mobile coverage ................

VP959
1st Feb 2018, 07:40
It's illegal, and they are probably spoofing somebody else's number so you can't track them down.

They are indeed spoofing the same number every time they call, a UK Southampton area code number. At least, on the half a dozen times I've dialled 1471 to see who called it's been from the same number. The calls are regular to within around 10 minutes every weekday, around midday, and we've been getting them for around two or three years now. On the one time I answered the call it was an Indian call centre, (only based on the accent of the caller), and was allegedly a pharmacy in Canada offering cheap prescription drugs. The daft thing is that I'd have thought they would have known about the UK NHS and it's prescription drug system; why would I want to buy any medication that is free from the pharmacy here?

My guess is that this is a robot dialler, as suggested earlier, just because it's around the same time of day, every weekday.

Ex Cargo Clown
1st Feb 2018, 07:48
Had a call the other day asking if was Mr xxxxx, I knew it was a scam call as they refered me to my late father's name. Wound them up for a bit, then eventually pointed out they'd probably need a seance not a phoneline. Got a call 5 mins later with their supervisor screaming and swearing at me for wasting their time. Think I taught him a few new words.

KelvinD
1st Feb 2018, 08:00
I used to answer the phone and when the caller asked for me, I would say "Hang on, I will go and get him". Put the phone down and return to watching the TV. Some minutes later, I would replace the receiver.
Eventually tiring of this, I just switched off the ringer. I figured that all those I wanted calls from would know my mobile number. Others who may be genuine, utility companies etc, would know my address and write to me. Now I keep the landline simply for the broadband access.

Pontius Navigator
1st Feb 2018, 08:35
It's illegal, and they are probably spoofing somebody else's number so you can't track them down.

Fortunately, at the moment, they don't spoof but simulate. If it was spoofed then an innocent party would ring out or answer. Simulated numbers are always unobtainable.

This is in contrast with internet scammers who break into peoples IP addresses.

ExSp33db1rd
1st Feb 2018, 08:39
so we were paying vast amounts in line rental in order to receive about one non-junk call per week.

How do you manage broadband without a landline?

Yes, those of us that live in rural areas with no mobile coverage ................

And .. if you live in Rural New Zealand .... many power "outages" that put the cellphone towers out of business, so the only way I can ring the local electricity supplier to find out what is going on ... and sometimes even be the first one to advise them that there is a new problem .... is by landline, and of course not even a "modern" cordless handset, 'cos that needs a master receiver to push the signal around the house to the cordless handsets in various rooms, and that needs AC power at 240 volts, but the old fashioned, bakelite black handset plugged directly into the wall socket still works. At least we have exchanged it for one with pushbuttons instead of a dial.

Pontius Navigator
1st Feb 2018, 08:41
I have an Amex card. They delight in trying to entice me to use the card. I don't mind the emails. I put their phone on barred. They ring and it is always engaged.

Simplythebeast
1st Feb 2018, 09:05
I just use this phone, used to get marketing calls daily. Havent had any since I bought this phone last year.
Fed up with nuisance calls? The BT8600 phone can help - BT (http://home.bt.com/tech-gadgets/phones-tablets/bt8600-nuisance-call-blocker-phone-protect-unwanted-calls-11364203137429)

longer ron
1st Feb 2018, 09:06
Originally Posted by longer ron
when I started to get local calls,jeep sold to a dodgy local chap for cash !

Ah, so you sold it to your local GSA club then ;) :E

He was not that dodgy ;)

Ogre
1st Feb 2018, 09:16
If I phoned a former colleague at home I would get the phone answered to the sound of the vacuum cleaner, and a voice yelling "hang on". The vaccuum cleaner would then be switched off, the phone picked up and a voice saying "that's better now..." at this point the doorbell would ring, and the voice would say "oh hang on, there's someone at the door.." The phone would get put down again, a door open, much happy conversation for a couple of minutes then a muffled "I must go there's someone on the phone". Door closes, then the phone gets picked up again and the voice goes "It's like a mad house round here today, I just can't get the time to think. Hopefully we can get the time to chat, but before you do I must warn you this is actually a recording and I'm not actually here. Leave a message after the tone"

Hell of a long answering machine message, but it had a significant track record of messages that consisted of a few muffled swear words and the phone at the other end being slammed down.

UniFoxOs
1st Feb 2018, 09:17
Are there people who still have landlines?

Yet another one here - we also have no mobile signal, and also use the landline for broadband, and it's cheaper calls than any mobile deal I can get, and the battery doesn't go flat in the middle of a call and....

VP - BT now have some sort of blocking service, supposedly free but it advertises to do what Truecall does in the blocking department. It's called Call Protect.

I used Truecall for a year until the free remote control deal ran out, then when the PSU packed up a couple of years ago I didn't bother to re-instate it. Still get very few cold callers as I guess they took me off the list during the time it was active.

gruntie
1st Feb 2018, 09:21
I heard of someone who got a premium-rate 0870 number installed as his home phone line, which he then advertised far & wide to all and sundry.

The more telemarketing/nuisance calls he then received, the fatter the cheque sent to him at the month end.

Sallyann1234
1st Feb 2018, 09:23
Precisely the same as Sallyann1234 said. Every few days I have great pleasure in reviewing all those unknown callers who were unable to speak with me!
Last time I checked the log there were 142 numbers that can't ring my phone.
Playing along with rubbish callers is all very well, but really I reckon my time is more important than theirs.

Pinky the pilot
1st Feb 2018, 09:31
The Pinky residence has a 'silent' (unlisted) number. Only those whom we wish to or need to, have our number.

Therefore; No problems.

Exrigger
1st Feb 2018, 09:48
The one we got yesterday was one that actually made me laugh, we were out and the Indian sounding lady started a conversation with the female voice on the answering machine, finally realised and hung up.

Hydromet
1st Feb 2018, 10:07
I get a lot from (sounds like) Indian scammers. I put the best, most imaginative, offensive, racist, invective, referencing the callers ancestry, medical and sexual history, and my personal wishes for their ongoing good health (or not) that I could come up with into google translate, recorded the Indian translation and play that back to them before hanging up. I don't want there to be any misunderstandings about how I feel about them

vaqueroaero
1st Feb 2018, 11:08
I've had some great times talking with the 'IRS', I managed to keep one guy on the phone for 45 minutes before I got called some very unpleasant names.
I've also had ones where you unwittingly are talking to a recording.
There was also a spell where I would receive calls from my own phone number. That was fun.
The worst ones are people trying to sell me an extended warranty on a car that I sold 18 months ago.

treadigraph
1st Feb 2018, 11:35
About 20 years ago I had a call at about 2am on a Saturday: "Hello, from the length of time it took you to answer, you obviously don't have an answer phone and I have..." Interruption by a long stream of drunken invective from me; ancestry, meeting up on Tuesday, self copulation, I ran pretty much through my entire abusive language repertoire... "Well there's no need to be rude..."

To this day I don't know if it was a genuinely ill-thought through telemarketing scheme, or some ****'s idea of a joke.

My mum was in hospital at the time so I couldn't leave the phone unplugged.

I rang BT the next day to ask for advice; "well" said the very nice operator "the one thing you mustn't do is go to Halfords and buy a nice loud air horn..."

denachtenmai
1st Feb 2018, 16:48
If talktalk is your ISP then CallSafe works perfectly.
Was plagued with scam call until last Thursday, when I activated CallSafe, since then none, nada, zip.

denachtenmai
1st Feb 2018, 16:50
Forgot to mention, it's free!

Gertrude the Wombat
1st Feb 2018, 18:05
How do you manage broadband without a landline?
??? - the cable modem connection is a completely separate co-ax cable, nothing to do with any landline.

OK, so when I first bought the cable modem service they did insist on supplying a landline as well, but I never used that one at all (never plugged a phone into it) and it's long gone from the contract.

If you're thinking of RF bodged over Victorian copper, well ...

Gertrude the Wombat
1st Feb 2018, 18:09
recorded the Indian translation
How do you work out which of India's 800-odd languages is appropriate for any particular individual scammer?

(I've observed Indian tourists at the Taj Mahal from different parts of India talking to each other in English, being the language that they had in common.)

EGTE
1st Feb 2018, 18:35
For BT customers on a copper 'phone service just get the Call Protect service added to your account.
It is totally free and works splendidly. If an unwanted call does slip through the net it is simple to block that number.

Just Google BT Call Protect.

AeroSpark
1st Feb 2018, 19:12
What I'd like to know is two things.

How can these companies get away with calling people who have opted out of all telephone marketing and on the TPS?

How can they spoof caller display numbers so that an overseas call appears to be coming from the UK, and is there an easy way to stop this?

The reason I ask is that I get a call every day of the week, around midday, from the same "UK" (supposedly Southampton area code) number, that is some sort of overseas pharmacy trying to sell drugs. I now just ignore any call received around this time every day, and let it go to the answering machine (but they never leave a message). 1471 reports the same "Southampton" phone number whenever I've bothered to check.

I can't be bothered to play games with them, and the screening devices available all seem both expensive and a bit of a nuisance for genuine callers who are trying to get through.

As an SO resident I can confirm its very possible someone from round here is trying to sell you drugs!;)

BirdmanBerry
1st Feb 2018, 19:24
So with VoIP you can (illegally) spoof any outbound number very simply. We sell systems and I can add any number I want without any checking. BT are supposed to check but they don't.

Takes me a matter of minutes then I'm away but we only do this when someone is porting their number to us.

Nigerian Expat Outlaw
1st Feb 2018, 19:24
I just use this phone, used to get marketing calls daily. Havent had any since I bought this phone last year.
Fed up with nuisance calls? The BT8600 phone can help - BT (http://home.bt.com/tech-gadgets/phones-tablets/bt8600-nuisance-call-blocker-phone-protect-unwanted-calls-11364203137429)

Likewise; nuisance calls instantly cut from around 6 per week to nil. Great investment. :ok:

NEO

Rosevidney1
1st Feb 2018, 23:21
The BT 8600 is stylish home phone packed with technology that gives you control who you speak too.

I wonder a) Where it was made, and b) who wrote the copy? Probably not a native English speaker!

Sallyann1234
1st Feb 2018, 23:24
The BT 8600 is stylish home phone packed with technology that gives you control who you speak too.

I wonder a) Where it was made, and b) who wrote the copy? Probably not a native English speaker!

I've been told that they license the software from Truecall. No evidence though.

Edit: The BT ad does say 'powered by Truecall" so it should work well.

Simplythebeast
1st Feb 2018, 23:25
The BT 8600 is stylish home phone packed with technology that gives you control who you speak too.

I wonder a) Where it was made, and b) who wrote the copy? Probably not a native English speaker!

Doesnt matter if its made by a long lost Amazonian tribe...fact is it works extremely well.

Hydromet
2nd Feb 2018, 05:26
How do you work out which of India's 800-odd languages is appropriate for any particular individual scammer?

(I've observed Indian tourists at the Taj Mahal from different parts of India talking to each other in English, being the language that they had in common.)Hindi seems to do the job.

tdracer
2nd Feb 2018, 07:53
How do deal the best:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-7OgWcwgB50


Gordy, that guy comes on my satellite radio comedy channel from time to time. He has one where the telemarketer is pushing carpet cleaning and he goes into this bit about 'can you get blood out of a carpet - there is a whole lot of it' (obviously referring to a murder scene). I was driving, and I started laughing so hard I had to pull over :}
If only I was that imaginative...

cattletruck
2nd Feb 2018, 09:57
The trick is, whether true or not, to tell them where they and the race they represent fit in with the grand scheme of things - gets them every time.

Blacksheep
2nd Feb 2018, 13:55
1. Breathe slowly and quietly into the mouthpiece while listening for a little while, then, using a higher pitched than normal but very soft voice say "You're a very naughty man/lady" and carry on the breathing until they hang up. It's even better if you can sniff a runny nose.

2. Answer in Welsh. e.g. "Bore Da. Frank dw'i. Sut dych chi?"

3. Shout in a breathless manner "OK! It's done! But there's blood all over the place!". Then after a long pause, "Harry! Is that you? Harry! Harry!! Oh what have we done!" (use a name appropriate to the gender of the caller.)

Pace
2nd Feb 2018, 14:36
I had a fraud from Africa about a long lost relative of mine in Africa
He was close friends witha Leader of an African country who had been toppled and had a lot of money past to him
They needed a relative in the U.K to facilitate a transfer of millions

I had some fun with them
Replied that I was very interested
I wrote back that I hadn’t heard from my uncle Harold for decades since his marriage breakdown
He had flipped and was hitting the booze heavily and had just vanished without trace

Last I had heard was that he had been eaten by a Lion in Africa so I was very excited that he was still alive

I would be excited to meet him and arrange all
If they could transfer $10,000 initially that would cover my fare
I would send them a account number

I played this out for some time asking stupid stuff like did he have that Parrot called snapper still and asking if he ever managed to replace the wooden leg as last time I saw him it was riddled with woodworm

They were asking me for money and me them for quite a while until they cottoned on

fitliker
2nd Feb 2018, 14:52
Asking the unrequited caller " What are you wearing ? "
Seems to get one placed on some kind of do not call list rfn .
If they are still persistent or you have not creeped them off with the elecutions , crank up the creep intonation.
Questions like " Do you look better naked ? "
Might ruin your chances or improve them depending on party affiliation in any elections for public office ,
May you enjoy the silence of the phone not ringing .

Ogre
2nd Feb 2018, 22:17
3. Shout in a breathless manner "OK! It's done! But there's blood all over the place!". Then after a long pause, "Harry! Is that you? Harry! Harry!! Oh what have we done!" (use a name appropriate to the gender of the caller.)

Blacksheep, again I want to ask for a "like" button.

Personally I have answered the phone with a very inquisitive "Da?" in the best Russian accent I can manage. When they start talking I then go on to "How you get this number? Do you know who you have called? Stay where you are, Boris will come get you...."

IcePack
2nd Feb 2018, 23:12
Does this If somebody calls and you are unable to answer, then this phone's voicemail cuts in, which is fine, BUT... If the caller hangs up as soon as they hear your voicemail message, then these phones remain permanently on 'someone is leaving a message'. Then, if another caller tries to call they simply get the engaged tone and are unable to get through to you. If this happens while you are away, then your line can remain engaged to incoming calls for hours, or even days.
happen with the 8600BT? (Quote from a review)

Pinky the pilot
3rd Feb 2018, 00:52
Personally I have answered the phone with a very inquisitive "Da?" in the best Russian accent I can manage. When they start talking I then go on to "How you get this number? Do you know who you have called? Stay where you are, Boris will come get you...."

What sort of reaction does that usually get, Ogre?
And if there was a 'like' smilie, you'd get one from me!:ok::D

Super VC-10
3rd Feb 2018, 08:02
We get calls from a call centre in India. I take great delight in telling them in Dutch that they have the wrong number. We usually have the answerphone set and people that know us know to speak and we will pick up if we are there. Sometimes we answer if we are expecting a call, but this sometimes results in getting the call centre.

HHornet
3rd Feb 2018, 13:23
A million years ago when insurance and double glazing were the only cold callers, I was told by a friend to respond to life insurance phone calls in this manner.
"Yes, we can meet, let me get my diary".
"Sorry, nope can't make Monday, I am sky diving. Tuesday's a no go because I am BASE jumping. Wednesday's a goer, oh wait, not it's not, I have pencilled in the start of my K2 training".
After a while they got the message that the recipient of the call wasn't good odds for life insurance.

OldCessna
3rd Feb 2018, 13:52
We get the ever eternal Indians calling to pull the scam that they are from the IRS and you need to pay money now!

They usually disappear quickly when they ask "To whom am I speaking?" and you answer. County Sheriffs Department and please hold while we finish tracing your number!

Smeagol
3rd Feb 2018, 14:15
Just had a call from an Indian person, not sure what scam they were trying as it was all a bit of a gabble. When asked from where he got my number the reply was, "From your father", at which point I informed him that was interesting as my father had died over 30 years ago. Click!

SOPS
3rd Feb 2018, 15:05
Here in Australia, we are constantly getting calls from Indian scammers claiming they are from Telstra and they are getting warnings that there is something wrong with our internet/computer. I let them go through their speel, ( trying to access to our computer, and when they say.."push enter and tell me what you see"....I answer.."Indian Donkey Porn...hey thats pretty cool!!"...I have had some amazing reactions:E:E:E:E:E:E

cargosales
3rd Feb 2018, 15:11
SOPS: Love it :-)

For the reality of why this is happening, and how it works, check out this article from The Guardian.

https://www.theguardian.com/news/2018/jan/02/the-scammers-gaming-indias-overcrowded-job-market

If I've got a spare 20 minutes I love to wind up these ar$eholes. Even when you tell them that the person are asking to speak to is dead they persist in trying to flog you something .. Grrrrrr. Otherwise it's simply being rude to them then hanging up...

Gertrude the Wombat
3rd Feb 2018, 15:22
For the reality of why this is happening, and how it works, check out this article from The Guardian.

https://www.theguardian.com/news/2018/jan/02/the-scammers-gaming-indias-overcrowded-job-market
An increasingly irritating problem with the Grauniad is the increasingly irritating pop-ups asking for money that STILL don't have a button you can press to tell then why they're not getting any of your money.

Fareastdriver
3rd Feb 2018, 15:58
I refuse to put money into the Guardian's offshore accounts.

Krystal n chips
3rd Feb 2018, 17:04
I refuse to put money into the Guardian's offshore accounts.

Thus depriving yourself of erudite reporting, analysis and commentary.

Of course, you could send them a photo of your BALPA card...and ask for a discount.

One subscribes by the way.

Back to why not simply hang up once the bolleaux starts....although funnily enough, as they are very rare, I did get a call on Thursday from the ever helpful Microsoft support team.....you would have thought by now they would have realised this has been so widely publicised that it's past it's try on date.

ElectroVlasic
3rd Feb 2018, 17:30
I played this out for some time asking stupid stuff like did he have that Parrot called snapper still and asking if he ever managed to replace the wooden leg as last time I saw him it was riddled with woodworm

They were asking me for money and me them for quite a while until they cottoned on
What you did is called scam baiting. There's a whole community of people who do this, some times for fun, other times for revenge, or some mix of the above. Most of this is focused on e-mail scam baiting, known as 419 scams due to the section of the Nigerian legal code that covers fraud.

They even have a web site, 419 Eater - The largest scambaiting community on the planet! (http://www.419eater.com/) , which is the PPrune of the spam baiting community. It has a forum, forum.419eater.com :: View Forum - MAIN SCAMBAITING FORUM (http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewforum.php?f=1) just like the one for PPrune.

See also:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Advance-fee_scam
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scam_baiting

Gertrude the Wombat
3rd Feb 2018, 17:35
Thus depriving yourself of erudite reporting, analysis and commentary.
Not at all - there's no paywall, the content is still free, it's just that they nag you for money (fair enough, I don't mind that) without offering you any way of telling them why you're not paying (which is what I'm whining about).

Trossie
3rd Feb 2018, 20:10
Thus depriving yourself of erudite reporting, analysis and commentary.

Of course, you could send them a photo of your BALPA card...and ask for a discount.

One subscribes by the way.

Back to why not simply hang up once the bolleaux starts....although funnily enough, as they are very rare, I did get a call on Thursday from the ever helpful Microsoft support team.....you would have thought by now they would have realised this has been so widely publicised that it's past it's try on date.

Gosh! 'One' subscribes!! How do they make any money out of only one subscriber?

(Gertie, if you don't read that rubbish you don't need to worry about their pop-ups.)


I've used a trick with excellent results several times. When receiving a call from a heavily-accented person from somewhere in the Indian sub-continent who clearly cannot pronounce names properly, I ask them to keep on talking then say aside "Ahmed, this is the call that we've been waiting for, are you tracking it OK?" An instant 'click, silence' from the other end every time!

Gargleblaster
3rd Feb 2018, 21:25
Robot calls are illegal where I live. Dunno if local law or EU rules. Anyways, my friend in NYC always starts such with a 15 sec silence followed by "do you believe in Jesus ?". If not enuf he goes on, even switching to satanism....

Gertrude the Wombat
3rd Feb 2018, 22:24
Robot calls are illegal where I live.
I've just been building a software system that makes robot calls. Of the "I thought you might like to know, seeing as you asked to be told, that your business-critical system has just broken" nature. Are there places where it is illegal for people to subscribe to such systems then?

Nigerian Expat Outlaw
3rd Feb 2018, 22:44
Does this
Quote:
If somebody calls and you are unable to answer, then this phone's voicemail cuts in, which is fine, BUT... If the caller hangs up as soon as they hear your voicemail message, then these phones remain permanently on 'someone is leaving a message'. Then, if another caller tries to call they simply get the engaged tone and are unable to get through to you. If this happens while you are away, then your line can remain engaged to incoming calls for hours, or even days.

happen with the 8600BT? (Quote from a review)

Not once since I've had one.

NEO

jimtherev
3rd Feb 2018, 22:44
Does this happen with the 8600BT? (Quote from a review)
Nope.
and this is making up the necessary message length

llondel
4th Feb 2018, 03:00
I have a landline, it's the number I give out when it's easier to give one than argue about why not. Just occasionally I'll answer one, usually a debt collector looking for the previous owner of the number (who hasn't had it for over three years now). Mostly it stops them calling (helps that the previous owner has a Hispanic name and I answer with a British accent), until they sell the account on and the next low-life tries it. Sometimes I just block the number so they get the recorded announcement and hang-up.

DON T
4th Feb 2018, 06:47
‘Have you been involved in an accident recently?’

Yes, but I can’t talk now, I’m on my way to the wife’s funeral.

Octane
4th Feb 2018, 10:14
There's always the oldie where the receiver says to the caller "can you please hold the line for a few minutes while I take my pants off"!

GROUNDHOG
4th Feb 2018, 20:05
I LOVE winding them up. Often answer the phone "Falmouth Coastguard" when they give the waffle "Are you in trouble,do you need a lifeboat, are you sinking".... they usually hang up!

RedhillPhil
4th Feb 2018, 22:20
Like it! My answer is usually, "Penzance home for retired Prime Ministers".

Smeagol
4th Feb 2018, 23:28
My answer phone begins:

" This is the east Norfolk home for the terminally bewildered..."

Real callers are sometimes amused.

DaveReidUK
4th Feb 2018, 23:32
I LOVE winding them up.

Me too.

Don't think for a moment that they care about the witty/absurd/abusive responses that they hear dozens of times a day.

But the one thing that gets them (mildly) rattled is stringing them along when they think they've found another sucker.

I remember once keeping a "Microsoft" caller talking for over an hour by playing the idiot. We'd got to the point where I was supposedly about to give her my credit card number when I ended the call by saying "I've kept you on the line for an hour, at least you haven't been scamming anyone else during that time".

She laughed and said "I don't care, there are plenty of others waiting out there".

So by all means wind them up and string them along if you have the time, but if you don't then anything longer than "F*** off" before hanging up is simply wasting your breath.

chuks
5th Feb 2018, 08:49
Living as I do in Germany I have been a bit puzzled to suddenly be the target of multiple calls from young men with heavy Indian sub-continent accents who claim that there is a "problem with your Windows."

The number calling has an 033 or 0333 prefix, which I understand is nonspecific.

There's the fact that they are calling a German number when they can only speak broken English, and probably Hindi, or Urdu, or whatever. Do they not know what country uses 0049 as a country code? Most people here do not speak English all that willingly.

Anyway, the first one I listened to for a while, with his spiel about how he was calling from the Microsoft Help Center because there was a problem with my Windows that needed urgent fixing.

"Where are you calling from?"

"I am calling from California."

"Okay. California is a big state. Where in California?"

"The Microsoft Help Center in California."

"We only have Apple computers here, so how could we have a problem with our Windows?"

*click*

Other times I ask "Why the heavy Indian accent if you are calling from the States?" *click*

The last one gave his precise location as "San Francisco City." Never heard it referred to that way, but perhaps it's a new thing there. Then he hung up on me, the rude bastard!

One before that, when I told him to f*ck off and stop bothering me with his nonsense that would not fool a child, said "Oh sir, no abuse!" before hanging up. Better raised, that one.

Another one, when I told him he was calling from India, asked "Who told you that?" I told him "I was able to figure that one out for myself," and then he hung up on me.

The next guy after him just hung up when he heard my voice. Must have been the same guy? Do they use some sort of auto-dialing?

A couple of them, when I told them that we only used Apple computers here, which is actually true, immediately switched to being from the Apple Help Center. Uh-huh ....

I got an e-mail the other week from Apple. It was about how someone had used my Apple password to log onto a pad in the Philippines. Everything looked kosher, except that the e-mail itself had come from the Philippines. There were a couple of pages that seemed pretty routine, until I came to the one that asked for my credit card details. Then I went back to see where this had come from, and then deleted it. Aside from that it really did look 100% genuine, as if it really had come from Apple, all very neatly and professionally done.

Trossie
5th Feb 2018, 11:15
A response to the 'Windows Computer' one that I have enjoyed has been:

"Oh good! I was about to call you guys. I've recently had a windows computer installed, you know the one that opens the windows when the sun is shining but closes them when is starts to rain. But it has been malfunctioning recently and hasn't been closing the windows when it starts to rain. If I talk you through the systems, could you help me to rectify the problem?"

After a few baffled responses where I insist on talking about the computer that opens and closes the windows depending on rain or sun the response is usually 'click, silence'!

flywatcher
6th Feb 2018, 01:32
I think it is very important to ask them for their first name, and make sure you get it right and pronounce it properly, before you address them by their name and then tell them to F*** off. I believe that it makes the experience more personal.

oldpax
6th Feb 2018, 01:43
Keep an "Acme thunderer"by the phone,one blast on that will suffice!!!

Hydromet
6th Feb 2018, 06:14
Not a scammer, but a 'legitimate' charity canvassing company. I was in the middle of a complex design on new CAD software. I have to answer the phone in case it's a customer, but wasn't at all pleased to be interrupted by this P***k, so I sent the following email to all their offices and posted it to them as a farcebook message.

As canvassing calls interrupt my work, I have found it necessary to introduce a charge for answering them, in the same way as you, no doubt, charge your clients to make the calls.

The rates are $50 to answer the call and listen for one (1) minute, and a further $20 per minute or part thereof after that. I assure you that as this advice is on record, I will pursue payment vigorously.
You may avoid payment for my service by not calling me.

Yours faithfully
Fred Bloggs
Ph: 123 4567 8901

acbus1
6th Feb 2018, 11:37
Turn the phone "bell" off.

Use an answering machine or service if you must. The nuisance types don't like them.

Anyone wants us, they know to email. Spam is easily ignored/deleted.

keyboard flier
6th Feb 2018, 12:10
Depending on my mood I might play along.
If it's the accident in a car call. I tell them yes and it was serious. When they ask how serious I ask them how serious is getting the babysitter pregnant in the back seat of the wife's car? It was an accident and it's serious!

I've told double glazing firms that the ones installed need replacing because they are not secure as it only took me a few seconds to break in and they cant talk to the homeowners because they are tied up at the moment.

Pontius Navigator
6th Feb 2018, 21:05
On the windows one I string him along. He asks me to press the cee tee at ell key. Sometimes I give all the right responses but no computerized.

Another I have gone through the hoops as they take me into parts I have not been before.

Best though, "I don't have a c t r l key" and eventually tell them I am using a kindle.

cdtaylor_nats
7th Feb 2018, 18:13
BT Call Guardian is Truecall technology that BT licenses for their phones.

I use Truecall and for zap list callers it plays the number unobtainable sound.

I find that calls that are blocked taper off and then after a while a new lot start. I only ever notice when I look at the Truecall logs.

G-CPTN
7th Feb 2018, 18:25
I regularly and frequently receive notification of 'missed calls' - when I haven't heard any ringing.
On the rare occasions that I get a ringing call from one of these numbers and answer, the call is discontinued as soon as I answer.
Someone is having a laugh (several someones unless they are spoofing different numbers).

Pontius Navigator
7th Feb 2018, 20:48
G-CPTN, no, you are probably too slow and someone beat you to it.

Rossian
8th Feb 2018, 08:33
..... "Bodmin Morgue, duty corpse speaking......"

The Ancient Mariner

UniFoxOs
8th Feb 2018, 08:54
‘Have you been involved in an accident recently?’

No, it wasn't an accident, I drove over him deliberately.

Pontius Navigator
8th Feb 2018, 14:04
I was allegedly to blame for scraping a car. The claim was settled. Now I get calls saying I had a passenger in my car who could claim.

FFS, it was my wife, there was no damage to my car and we were totally unaware of the 'crash'. Indeed considering the circumstances and other car, there was no way that we could have caused the alleged damage.