Going Batty

[ORTAC22]

I spent six years at a UK airport enjoyably and competently Marshalling a wide range of Civil jet and Military a/c. Do the readers have any thoughts on the airports with the WORST marshalling practises??

[Cloud1]

Sounds like you do? Anything you may want to share...?

[CabinCrewe]

perhaps on one of the more technical sub forums?

[Johnny F@rt Pants]

and of course the ATC can be................................................ highly overpaid for the standard and service they deliver:}:}

I remember visiting Murcia regularly and the marshaller there used to signal turn left when he meant right, I knew what he meant so went the right way, until one time I decided to follow his instruction to see what he would do. He watched me turn a little before I corrected myself, whereupon he withdrew his service completely and sat in his car:sad:

[mustbeaboeing]

Jeddah during the Hadj arrivals a few years ago.....not a clue

[xtypeman]

Many many years ago at an airport south of London. Picture the scene its a cold wet November night and a 747 freighter has just landed and is taxying to the cargo ramp. Out goes the worst GPU guy. Dressed in dark blue boilersuit and wearing a donkey jacket(long before the days of high vz). As its cold he also has black gloves on...... 74 approaches the stand. There he stands on the centre line but does not have Batts or torches. So up go two arms and then he signals using his first finger on each hand! At this point I hid in the ramp car.........

[ORTAC22]

Wonderful chaotic scenes..... Please keep 'em coming!

[ETOPS]

Paris Orly late 1990's.....

I'm taxiing in a Boeing 757 and given a late stand change. As I pull towards the new location a small van appears at about 100 kmh and a young energetic marshaller jumps out and starts vigorously waving me in. Because of the size and shape of the stand and the height of the 757 cockpit he has to start walking backwards to keep me in view - he keeps backing up until he disappears through an open door in to ground level office!! :eek:

I stopped - not for safety reasons. You can't taxy and laugh hysterically at the same time.............

[ORTAC22]

When preparing to marshall an A320 one summer's day,one of my Ramp colleagues,newly trained,begged me to let him marshall the fast approaching a/c as it entered the Apron.Apparently the bulk of****'s family had gathered on the Viewing Gallery(Landside and behind us) The A320-new to the apron slowed and at that moment**** urged on by his family with shouts of "Go on my son" "Give it some" etc.etc. , turned round to his audience and gave them a cheery bat-wave. At this the A/c feeling somewhat neglected,resumed its course and trundled off, past the Tower. Haunted by the thought of a P45 I grabbed the bats and raced across a patch of grass. My legs then became entangled by a massive cable-tie,left by the night Mail loaders. Down I went to laughter and rude comments from the Viewing area....... ATC stopped the a/c ,a push-back tug was called for and I beckoned **** over for tea and a chat.

[Curious Pax]

Did a summer at MAN 30 years ago as a turn round coordinator (they called us dispatchers, but that confuses some folks on here!). Went out to meet a JAT 727 on stand 6, but didn't notice that the man in the orange boiler suit and table tennis bats had failed to show. Said 727 FO was waving out of his window at me as he came up the taxiway, so I helpfully waved him onto stand and stopped him at the right place (I'd been watching when those trained in such had been doing it all summer). Probably broke all manner of rules by doing so, but no one seemed concerned - I just enjoyed the power trip (possibly the last time I had one!) of a large aircraft doing what I told it to!!

I forget if that was the JAT flight where all the crew bar the junior hosty disappeared to the shops as soon as they arrived (I think pax were still deplaning) and returned 10 minutes after STD. What everyone else in the terminal thought when the call went out for the crew of JUxxx to return to the aircraft as it was waiting to depart I don't know!!