Ideas for" Innovative ways of saving money "

[Got2luvem]

Latest email from TCAS..... any good ideas ....

[sluggums]

Yes, delete the email.

[BigGeordie]

Here's one: treat the employees better so they don't leave. Save money on recruitment and training.

Now, where's my Najam?:E

[lowstandard]

I think in place of all these paper charts that we currently use, we could introduce an "Electronic" Flight Bag.

This "Electronic" Flight Bag is a new ground breaking, industry leading idea. You could use a tablet type interface that could fit into the flight deck by some sort of mounting device.

Since this is such leading edge technology that would require years of testing and would have to go through multiple layers of management and regulatory approval ($), I will volunteer to do my research on reduced roster hours (only 85hrs).

I guess there might be a new Windows version coming up in the next few years so maybe we could wait till then to really test it out.

I think that would be quite an innovation as well as frickin lasers to shoot back at people when they shoot their frickin lasers at us.

[natops]

dont increase the target without telling the employees....

[Monarch Man]

Idea number 1 (http://www.forbes.com/sites/meghanbiro/2014/01/19/happy-employees-hefty-profits/)

Idea number 2 (http://assessmentpros.com/can-keeping-employees-happy-keep-your-business-profitable/)

Idea number 3 (http://www.theatlantic.com/business/archive/2014/11/a-new-business-strategy-treating-employees-well/383192/)

All of the above involve treating your staff well and entering the 21st century, something that's foreign to the culture, mentality and ethos of the current top floor at EK.

[sluggums]

Wow! Looking after your employees.

What a novel concept... to managers who have no interest in anything other that their own warped self-interests.

Most airlines, and many other businesses are like the Matrix. The people in power are hopelessly inured to the system, so totally dependant on it that they will defend it against any perceived threat. Us.

[GNL]

Employ monkeys..... after all they are 'trainable' and don't need paying ....

A win/win situation !!...... '"come on Captain Bubbles!"

[TangoUniform]

Close the main Costa in the bouncy castle. More productivity from the cubicle dwellers. :ok:

[Calmcavok]

No need to close Costa, just remove all the tables and chairs. Also from the smoking area outside.

[120feet]

OSN 1-2015


Starting immediately in an effort to increase productivity and therefore reduce cost by allowing us to operate with fewer employees. We will henceforth stop trying to treat our pilots like office staff and begin treating our office staff like pilots.


1. There will be no more national holidays. (Increases productivity 10%)
2. 8 Days off a month. (Increases productivity by 3%)
3. 24 hour shifts. (I know this may be an inconvenience for some of you, but we are a 24 hour airline.)
4. You will now be required to work most weekends.
5. We are increasing the average work day to 10 hours. (Increases productivity by 20%)
7. We will install a day/night care for employees children so they can work extended hours. (Increases productivity by 10%)
8. WE will install Lazyboy chairs (Next to Daycare.) So when employees are working longer days they can rest. (Make sure to subtract time in Lazyboy from actual hours working)
9. We will wait till the last week of the month to tell employees what their next months working hours will be to maintain extreme flexibility in planning. Also 2-3 months a year you will not know what you are doing until 1830 the night before.
10. While at work we will come by your cubical with your food so you will not require a lunch hour. You will now be eating at your desk. You will have a choice between chicken, beef, or sometimes fish with white or red sauces. As the new schedules will be exhausting we will provide you with free caffeine. Coffee, cola or tea.
11. If you are sick you will be required to come into work anyhow. Unless your job affects safety, (e.g. Dispatcher) In that case you will be required to come into work in order to prove you are indeed too sick to do your job. You will wait up to 4 hours to be seen by a nurse and doctor so you may as well just come and work.
12 All training will be via instructional video and will be accompanied by a test. You will complete these on your day off.
13. If you take less than 10 days of vacation a month you will be expected to still put in a full months work. (Saves up to 17%)
14. You will be assigned vacation days at our convenience.
15. We will reduce vacation days given from 45 to 30.


These few simple changes will save the company millions a month. We appreciate your sacrifice and understanding during these difficult and challenging times.

[Dropp the Pilot]

One omission:

On occasion you will be required to remain in your office for 16 hours. Short breaks of 4 hours will be permitted, but during those breaks you may not sit in a chair nor at a table nor may you walk, but must crawl under your desk and lie motionless and prone for the entire period. There will be a toilet 40 meters away during your rest but to use it you must first join a queue of persons selected at random from a globally-diverse group of 400 plebs.

[captainsmiffy]

Haha! Excellent......but it will go right over the heads of non EK pilots.....they just dont understand.....

[Juan Heych]

Haha! Excellent......but it will go right over the heads of non EK pilots.....they just dont understand.....

16. A bright floodlight will be installed directly over each desk in order to prevent fatigue. A loudspeaker playing audio from the latest Bollywood film will be available to provide additional protection against tiredness.

[CanadaKid]

120feet

Excellent suggestions

However your productivity increases cannot be imagined by the office staff nor that some employees are already there ... 'going the extra mile(s)'.

Cheers, CK

[fantom]

Easy peasy.

Start a new ponzi scheme in EK.

[Emma Royds]

Stop all management bonuses.

Failure to meet targets will result in salary deduction instead.

[Rather Be Skiing]

Aah, ya gotta love'm! Treat your staff like dirt, then try to engage them! That's good humour. Needed a good laugh.

[Outatowner]

When does TCAS leave the building? Trying to leave on a high note, it seems. A bit late.

RBS you summed it up perfectly. The rationale behind this mindset is the complete and utter lack of shame. They do not know the meaning of the word. We'll see a follow-up email thanking the 1000s of pilots who responded... maybe "50%" like with the parallel bidding sham.

How about office staff sign on Day 1 0700-1700,
Day 2 1700-0300,
Day 3 0300-1300..... repeat.

[Flyboy_SG]

EK is still using paper charts ? I'm surprised.

[harry the cod]

Outatowner

In answer to your question......today. Well, Thursday 27th to be exact. What I find somewhat of an anachronism is the fact that we announced several weeks ago the Principle for an Emirates cadet flying school, the construction of which is yet to begin. That's all well and good if it wasn't for the fact that this Company still hasn't announced who's going to head up Flight Operations, probably the most important department in an Airline that carries the largest number of International passengers in the World! As of 1530 local today, that position is now vacant. Who, in the event of a catastrophic incident, would be responsible for answering to the authority? This is a major post holder position for god's sake and the fact that the new DSVP FO has not even been announced is nothing short of disgraceful. There's nothing like getting your priorities right.....and this is nothing like it!


flyboy SG

Surprised? Don't be. After well over a decade here, nothing surprises me anymore. This is a Gulf Air in the making but it's too culturally insensitive to highlight that to those that can make the difference. We saw this unfolding around 5-7 years ago, a monumental cock up of overworked and demotivated crew battling insufficient leave availability, incompetent administrative procedures and sycophantic idiots too stupid to see the wood for the trees while they all pat each other on the back for a job well done. For many of us, it's all playing out in painful slow motion but for some senior management, it seems a surprise. Short of pilots? Why? Did we not announce in the usual blaze of hyped up advertising hundreds of new aircraft orders. We told the World 4 years ago they were coming, obviously someone forget to inform those that controlled recruitment that fact! Arrogance? Ignorance? Incompetence? Call it what you will. I call it all three! Sadly, believe it or not, we do have some good managers who are trying to keep things on the road but achieving that goal is another story altogether! Until we remove the incompetents who've inherited their positions through nepotism, seniority and racial discrimination, this Company will never achieve what it's capable of.

Still, let's not focus on mere triviality. Time no doubt to announce another multi million dollar sporting sponsorship or some fancy advert that relates to around 1% of our passengers.

Harry

[fliion]

'Arrys back.

Spot on.

f.

[Flyboy_SG]

Sad to hear. Too far from the worlds best airline title.

[Mr Angry from Purley]

120feet

Always very easy to take cheap shots at hard working ground staff who would probably do all of your idea's if they got paid as much as you (isn't that always the reply that comes the other way!).
Like my boss says if you want to earn £500 for working 1 minute into your day off go be a pilot. If you want to have a "Office" lifestyle go work in the Office is my reply and take the pay that goes with it.

In 99% of cases ground staff have hugh respect and admiration for aircrew and appreciate some (if not all) of the pressures and demands that you are put under.
By making the assumption they all sit round drinking Costa doesn't do the perception of Pilots any good however so whilst many have sympathy with your plight - be reasonable
By all means aim comments at Managers, VP's, hangers on that do the square root of nothing apart from shuffle pieces of paper and come in late and go home early - they are fair game!

:\

[sluggums]

Mr Angry, I agree with your POV.

However, you should pop into the 3rd floor at HQ sometime and listen to the disparaging comments/conversations that are frequently overhead about the pilots. These are not necessarily the managers but frequently the 'admin' staff. Not only that, they're quite happy to openly, and in front of anyone within earshot, use the names of the pilot(s) concerned. I have little time for the office pen pushers in this regard...

[SOPS]

Have to agree with you 100%, Sluggums. I always thought there was a definite 'us and them ' mentaility with many on the third floor..including some 'managers' who are there because they prefer not to be on the flight deck, but like to tell those who are, how it should be done.

Something I always found incredible, those like AS, JA, MM and The Horse, have never flown an Emirates aircraft Or a EK sector in their life, but make the policy on how it is to be done.

[120feet]

My post was a satirical response to the RUMOR that certain a Manager made a comment about the lazy pilots getting 15 days off a month and that pilots should be treated like office workers and be given no more than 8 days off. A la 330 schedules. So my post was simply a reverse of that scenario. Except I never called the office workers lazy nor made any such inference.
In fact I made zero "cheap shots" towards the ground staff. I reread my post again to make sure, and am pretty sure you either misread the intent of the post, or I did not state it clearly. But there are no cheap shots, insinuations or references made to how hard the ground staff work. The post referenced office staff, but again there were no cheap shots or derogatory remarks made toward them either. Just out of curiosity how many of your 330/340 brothers actually get this insane overtime? Yes, I would agree with you if office staff were given overtime they would take advantage of it. There is a reason pilots get paid so much overtime $$. It is precisely to get the company to hire more pilots.



I always tell my friends, one of the reason pilots get paid what they do is to miss Christmas and children's birthdays. However, what EK pilots are doing is well above and beyond.

I, (Yes this is my personal opinion.) feel that one of the reasons Pilots and FA's get the short end of the stick is precisely because no one in the office has to work with them en masse on a daily basis. They have zero representation in the meeting rooms. EK Pilots work 30% more than when they were hired. In order to translate that over to office staff would mean everyone in EGHQ would be working Saturdays. During ALL measures imposed to "Save the company $$", how many affected only the EGHQ guys vs the Flight crew. Simply put, it's easy to sit in an office impose rules and changes on people you will never have to see. Yes, that last bit was a shot but not at the office staff.

[harry the cod]

120feet, agree with you 100% but not SOPS. Those individuals you mentioned have not entered this Company and made any drastic changes to our procedures so to say they 'made' the policy is somewhat misleading. AS certainly has to our working conditions such as flying hours and lack of leave etc but that's simply managing what he was told to enforce from AAR. JA, ED have not made sweeping changes to the way we operate aircraft and the only changes MM has made have, in my opinion, been for the good. More a cultural change towards attitude of training rather than any concrete procedural changes.

In any event, if you flipped burgers in McDonalds, can't see why that wouldn't qualify you to flip one in Burger King. Same process, different Company and all of the above have, at some time or other, flipped burgers. Get my drift?

Harry