101 Things not to do when flying

[pil]

No 1.

Have your photo taken with a stupid cheesy grin and a thumbs up, three seconds before getting twatted by a seneca like the chaps on the front of the PPL confuser

muppits.

[Pielander]

I think somebody's trying to say something about PPL's!

If this gets transferred to "Jet Blast", I think it should go via "Private Flying". :)

P.S. - How come you're allowed to write "twatted" but not allowed to write "S****horpe"?

[This message has been edited by Pielander (edited 11 June 2001).]

[RVR800]

Not looking at the attitude indicator
for more then 2 seconds in IMC

[ATCNightmare]

3. Never try and land whilst talking to the wrong Control Tower (easy mistake to make in the US - trust me)

4. Never get lost without money to refuel if necessary

5. Never make sarky comments about the controllers whilst you still have an open mike

[juswonnafly]

Pulling out the 'red' carb heat knob!

(tests your reactions though!)

:)

[Cypres]

Forgetting to take the 'Handbrake' off in a Tomahawk during a touch and go.


Climb you sucker climb!!!

[G SXTY]

Making your downwind call and telling them you're finals. http://www.pprune.org/ubb/NonCGI/redface.gif D'oh!

------------------
Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit pruning.

[long final]

Cyres .... Ow!!

You dont wanna get Whisky Whisky and Kilo Yankee mixed up whilst taking to manchester app down the low level ' Golf Bravo Juliett Wanky Wanky ' VERY embarrasing - especially when you try to explain it.....

LF

[PFO]

Stalling whilst turning finals at 500 ft AGL - you don't wanna do that!

PFO

[Pielander]

Taking off in a Tomahawk with a big black rain shower approaching from just beyond that hill over there.

Oh, and putting power on on a touch & go without straightening the aircraft out on the runway.

Oh... and adjusting your DI in turbulnce

[380]

phone to your girlfriend while circling over her house, she won't notice that there's an aircraft over her head and will just hear the motor noise

[This message has been edited by 380 (edited 11 June 2001).]

[Superpilot]

Don't forget to un-tie the plane before moving off...yes yes we've all done that one!

[BigAir]

Taking off in a Cessna when their is a CB directly overhead dumping everything it has on you!!!

- Not me who did this, but whilst sitting out the rain in a Warrior on the apron, we saw some fool do this, then promptly fly a circuit and land again!!!

[trustno1]

Forgetting to put the mags to both after power checks. Took off with 1 mag once. Nearly **** myself at 500 feet when the engine coughed.

[This message has been edited by trustno1 (edited 11 June 2001).]

[Capt Wannabee]

Conducting low level ariel photography in a military low level training route!

[Muppetfly!]

Be an Italian Tornado pilot and decide to go around on a circuit when just beginning finals.
This difficult(?) procedure requires full reheat when passing over the tower at 500 ish-feet, in addition to crossing diagonally across the circuit to the dead side. The other main factors are the Tornados both ahead and behind at the time...

A quite incredible move!!!

[schuler_tuned]

close your eyes every time you turn, during a trail lesson! no not me, my girlie. still, she did eventually come flying with me a few weeks afterwards, and yes, she still closed her eyes, even though i resricted the turns to rate ones, bless her!!

[This message has been edited by schuler_tuned (edited 11 June 2001).]

[schuler_tuned]

oh and while i'm thinking about it, don't open the mike and speak like you don't deserve the service your requesting!
zone penertrations and matz crossings etc are controller conditional, if you sound like you shouldn't be let through, then don't be surprised if you don't! a good r/t
transmit is as worthy of self-grats as a greaser.

[lone eagle]

Start the engine with the tow hook still attached.

!!!CLUNK!!! http://www.pprune.org/ubb/NonCGI/eek.gif http://www.pprune.org/ubb/NonCGI/eek.gif

LE.

[schooner]

Start the engine without the parking brake on, veeeeerrrry stimulating couple of seconds there http://www.pprune.org/ubb/NonCGI/eek.gif

whoa there tiger ( can a Tommy be like a tiger http://www.pprune.org/ubb/NonCGI/confused.gif )

cheers

[Frederic]

Thrust a smiling Captain...

[feetnkneestogether]

.....decide to pick your nose as you enter turbulence...!!!!

...you'll be tickling your eardrums. (Apparently)

[bow5]

While doing touch and goes don't forget to put the fuel pump on.

'Hmmm. I wonder why the fuel pressure is dropping?!' :rolleyes: Oops.

[NewBloke]

Breaking wind in the humid, confined space of a Bulldog........nasty. Actually, forgetting to remove the pitot cover must be a un-forgettable (!?) experience. Probably wouldn't be writing on here if you have done that though.....

[Superpilot]

Lone Eagle,

ooooph....you didn't!

[Cattivo]

Blocking the main approach frequency for one of the busiest airports in the world (Houston) with a stuck mike, while in your Cessna 150 on a cross-country. Honestly, they'll let any idiot fly these days!

[AMS]

Ah yes,

Also remember toes of the brakes before you initiate touch and go's !!! This however, I believe and can embarrasingly prove can happen when nervous!!


AMS

[ATCNightmare]

DONT tell the VERY busy US approach you have the runway in sight when you not actually convinced you do and then get half way through a stilted go around at 700ft straight past the control tower before being able to get in contact.

I am sure I could see people waving from the big jet as the controller told me get the hell out his airspace

[380]

Try to start the engine with mixer in lean position.

[schooner]

Variation on 380`s theme, start the engine without selecting a fuel tank, runs fine for a couple of minutes then doesn`t. Lucky I was only moving the a/c off the pumps. Would hate it to happen at about 200ft after takeoff http://www.pprune.org/ubb/NonCGI/eek.gif.

cheers

[Base leg]

380-
never flown with fuel injection ?

[northern_chique]

Pour hot coffee into a thermous cup in turbulence. the resuting injuries are excrutiating apparently.

Was caught in residual wake turbulence on at 200' on final. The runway turned 90 degrees in the windscreen. Not nice......

[Kookus]

Take off in fully loaded C310 with elevator trim in full nose down position and rudder trim way off to the left somewhere. How was I to know the engineers had been playing with it?

[Token Bird]

Kookus,

That's what pre-flight checks are for,

TB :rolleyes: