Helifire
5th Jun 2002, 23:07
ALPA WANTS GIRLS TO FLY: In a move designed to encourage more young
women to pursue careers as airline pilots, the Air Line Pilots
Association (ALPA) has designated June 15 as "Take Your Daughter To
Work And Let Her Fly The Plane" day. "There is an obvious disparity in
the number of female airline pilots as compared to their male
counterparts," said ALPA President Wayne Doerth. "Our members are
encouraged to allow their daughters to fly along with them on rotations
beginning on or about June 15 of this year. We hope that by letting
our little girls actually fly airliners (in level cruise only and under
strict supervision from certificated crewmembers), they will be
inspired to break through the 'glass ceiling' of the airline world and
become dues-paying pilots themselves," said Doerth.
SO DOES UTAH ANG: Pilots of a Utah Air National Guard F-16 fighter
squadron known as "The Flying Moroni" have begun a "Take Your Child On
A Live-Fire Mission" program in which the pilots' children will be
invited to accompany their fathers on live-fire missions over the
Bonneville Flats range to get the feeling of the "real world" of combat
flying. Chip Canyon, commander of The Flying Moroni, told AVweb: "A
lot of our children think that air combat is a joke and that their
daddies only go to Guard weekends to get away from Mommie and to drink.
Through this program, we intend to let them see the other side of the
coin."
AOPA TO BECOME A UNIT OF AOL TIME WARNER? "I can't confirm it
officially, but it's a natural move," said America Online founder Steve
Case about reports this week that AOL Time Warner had reached an
agreement-in-principle to acquire the Maryland-based Aircraft Owners
and Pilots Association (AOPA). Case stubbornly declined to provide
details of the deal, and AVweb's calls to AOPA went unreturned at press
time. But it's well known that AOPA has a "skunk works" team
developing a proprietary Internet-based pilot briefing site that would
replace DUATS and the FAA's archaic NOTAM system, and has been eyeing
the user-friendly interface technology in AOL Version 7.0 client
software. Another indication that the AOL/AOPA acquisition may already
be a done deal: AOPA President Phil Boyer recently spent two weeks at
FlightSafetyBoeing to earn his BBJ type rating.
DELTA LAUNCHES LONG-HAUL RJ SERVICE: Delta Airlines this week announced
the addition of four daily nonstops from its Atlanta hub to Frankfurt,
Germany, and Tokyo, Japan, using its connection partner ASA and the new
Canadair regional jet. According to Delta spokesman Leonardo DiCaprio,
"We found that if we added four 300-gallon drop tanks to our RJ fleet,
we could use them on our international routes. This will only reduce
their 50-passenger capacity by 35 people, and will allow us to sell our
Boeing 777s to competing airlines." Delta stock closed down 2 1/2 at
$37.50 in active trading.
PILOTS DO GET MORE: A recent online study indicates that certificated
pilots in the U.S. have sex 53 percent more often than the non-aviating
population. The study by market research firm PilotReports.com has
confirmed what America's pilots have suspected all along -- that
"pilots do have that special something" and are enjoying much more
active sex lives than their ground-bound counterparts. The study was
commissioned by BE A PILOT, the general aviation industry group formed
to encourage members of the general public to take flying lessons.
Last week, BE A PILOT President/CEO Drew Steketee unveiled the group's
new media promotional campaign based on the new slogan, "Start Flying,
Stop Sleeping Alone."
ON THE FLY...
<http://www.avweb.com/newswire/avfool02.html#otf>
Carbon-14 dating reveals that Bob Hoover's actual age is 352...
Alabama Wing of Commemorative Air Force seceded to protest new name...
All U.S. airspace will be under positive control by 2004...
Al-Queda flight school found 20 miles southeast of Kenosha, Wis.
************************************************************ *****
If you are enjoying this special edition of AVfalsch, don't
miss the expanded, even wilder version on AVweb's NewsWire!
<http://www.avweb.com/newswire/avfool02.html>
************************************************************ ******
_____________________________
AVweb's AVpoop Award...
Congratulations and a #2 Travel John go out to G. I. Gottago,
this week's AVpoop winner. Submit news tips via email to
<mailto:[email protected]>. Rules and information are at
<http://www.avweb.com/newswire/newstips.html>.
_______________________________________
New Articles and Features on AVweb
_______
COLUMNS <http://www.avweb.com/toc/columns.html>
"Pelican's Perch: The Last Word On Leaning"
Even after holing three pistons on his Bonanza, AVweb's John Deakin
stubbornly refused to concede that lean-of-peak operation could
result in damaging detonation and runaway cylinder head
temperatures. But a head-to-barrel separation during a recent
trans-Pacific flight finally made a believer of him. In this
month's column, Deakin disavows all his previous advice about
leaning technique, and concludes that the richer, the better.
______
SAFETY <http://www.avweb.com/toc/safety.html>
"The Preflight -- Safeties First"
What do you look at when you preflight your airplane? The dipstick?
The primary control surfaces? The prop blades? Fine, says AVweb's
Mike Busch, but you're probably ignoring the really important stuff
-- such as the cotter pins and safety wire that prevent critical
nuts and bolts (like the ones that hold on the wings, tail surfaces
and wheels) from coming off in flight. With the ink still wet on
his A&P ticket, Busch takes you on a detailed walk-around of a
typical GA aircraft (a Malibu Mirage) and points out the hundreds of
"safeties" that the prudent pilot should check before each flight.
________________________
KLYDE MORRIS COMIC STRIP <http://www.avweb.com/klyde>
Klyde straps on a bomb, easily passes through an airport security
checkpoint unchallenged, and then realizes that an ant-sized bomb
really isn't big enough to do much damage...
____________________________________________________________ _______
Reader feedback on AVweb's news coverage and feature articles:
<http://www.avweb.com/toc/avmail.html>
Reader mail has been sparse and uninteresting of late, a situation
we hope to remedy by publishing this issue of AVfalsch.
___________
Short Final
The Short Final editor has disavowed any knowledge of this edition, and
has promised to self-destruct within five seconds if this issue is
published.
________________________________________
Take Your Feedback And Stuff It!
AVfalsch is a once-yearly summary of the latest aviation lies,
rumors, innuendoes, half-truths and outright falsehoods created
for your April Fool's Day reading pleasure. Just in case there
was any doubt in your mind, everything in this issue was completely
bogus, and not a shred of it is true. (Except for the preceding
disclaimer, of course, and let's not forget this parenthetical
expression.)
An expanded and even wilder version (with foolish graphics) can be
found at <http://www.avweb.com/newswire/avfool02.html>. Don't miss
it!
Letters to the editor intended for publication in AVmail should be
sent to <mailto:[email protected]>.
This issue's contributors remain anonymous to protect the guilty.
Have a comment or question? Send it to <mailto:[email protected]>.
____________
SPECIAL NOTE...
This special April Fool's edition of AVweb's AVfalsch is presented
in good humor and in the hope that if we've inadvertently offended
anyone, we managed to inadvertently offend everyone equally. Thanks
for reading AVfalsch, and we'll see you next year.
________________________________________
Copyright (C) 2002, The AVweb Group.
All rights reserved.
women to pursue careers as airline pilots, the Air Line Pilots
Association (ALPA) has designated June 15 as "Take Your Daughter To
Work And Let Her Fly The Plane" day. "There is an obvious disparity in
the number of female airline pilots as compared to their male
counterparts," said ALPA President Wayne Doerth. "Our members are
encouraged to allow their daughters to fly along with them on rotations
beginning on or about June 15 of this year. We hope that by letting
our little girls actually fly airliners (in level cruise only and under
strict supervision from certificated crewmembers), they will be
inspired to break through the 'glass ceiling' of the airline world and
become dues-paying pilots themselves," said Doerth.
SO DOES UTAH ANG: Pilots of a Utah Air National Guard F-16 fighter
squadron known as "The Flying Moroni" have begun a "Take Your Child On
A Live-Fire Mission" program in which the pilots' children will be
invited to accompany their fathers on live-fire missions over the
Bonneville Flats range to get the feeling of the "real world" of combat
flying. Chip Canyon, commander of The Flying Moroni, told AVweb: "A
lot of our children think that air combat is a joke and that their
daddies only go to Guard weekends to get away from Mommie and to drink.
Through this program, we intend to let them see the other side of the
coin."
AOPA TO BECOME A UNIT OF AOL TIME WARNER? "I can't confirm it
officially, but it's a natural move," said America Online founder Steve
Case about reports this week that AOL Time Warner had reached an
agreement-in-principle to acquire the Maryland-based Aircraft Owners
and Pilots Association (AOPA). Case stubbornly declined to provide
details of the deal, and AVweb's calls to AOPA went unreturned at press
time. But it's well known that AOPA has a "skunk works" team
developing a proprietary Internet-based pilot briefing site that would
replace DUATS and the FAA's archaic NOTAM system, and has been eyeing
the user-friendly interface technology in AOL Version 7.0 client
software. Another indication that the AOL/AOPA acquisition may already
be a done deal: AOPA President Phil Boyer recently spent two weeks at
FlightSafetyBoeing to earn his BBJ type rating.
DELTA LAUNCHES LONG-HAUL RJ SERVICE: Delta Airlines this week announced
the addition of four daily nonstops from its Atlanta hub to Frankfurt,
Germany, and Tokyo, Japan, using its connection partner ASA and the new
Canadair regional jet. According to Delta spokesman Leonardo DiCaprio,
"We found that if we added four 300-gallon drop tanks to our RJ fleet,
we could use them on our international routes. This will only reduce
their 50-passenger capacity by 35 people, and will allow us to sell our
Boeing 777s to competing airlines." Delta stock closed down 2 1/2 at
$37.50 in active trading.
PILOTS DO GET MORE: A recent online study indicates that certificated
pilots in the U.S. have sex 53 percent more often than the non-aviating
population. The study by market research firm PilotReports.com has
confirmed what America's pilots have suspected all along -- that
"pilots do have that special something" and are enjoying much more
active sex lives than their ground-bound counterparts. The study was
commissioned by BE A PILOT, the general aviation industry group formed
to encourage members of the general public to take flying lessons.
Last week, BE A PILOT President/CEO Drew Steketee unveiled the group's
new media promotional campaign based on the new slogan, "Start Flying,
Stop Sleeping Alone."
ON THE FLY...
<http://www.avweb.com/newswire/avfool02.html#otf>
Carbon-14 dating reveals that Bob Hoover's actual age is 352...
Alabama Wing of Commemorative Air Force seceded to protest new name...
All U.S. airspace will be under positive control by 2004...
Al-Queda flight school found 20 miles southeast of Kenosha, Wis.
************************************************************ *****
If you are enjoying this special edition of AVfalsch, don't
miss the expanded, even wilder version on AVweb's NewsWire!
<http://www.avweb.com/newswire/avfool02.html>
************************************************************ ******
_____________________________
AVweb's AVpoop Award...
Congratulations and a #2 Travel John go out to G. I. Gottago,
this week's AVpoop winner. Submit news tips via email to
<mailto:[email protected]>. Rules and information are at
<http://www.avweb.com/newswire/newstips.html>.
_______________________________________
New Articles and Features on AVweb
_______
COLUMNS <http://www.avweb.com/toc/columns.html>
"Pelican's Perch: The Last Word On Leaning"
Even after holing three pistons on his Bonanza, AVweb's John Deakin
stubbornly refused to concede that lean-of-peak operation could
result in damaging detonation and runaway cylinder head
temperatures. But a head-to-barrel separation during a recent
trans-Pacific flight finally made a believer of him. In this
month's column, Deakin disavows all his previous advice about
leaning technique, and concludes that the richer, the better.
______
SAFETY <http://www.avweb.com/toc/safety.html>
"The Preflight -- Safeties First"
What do you look at when you preflight your airplane? The dipstick?
The primary control surfaces? The prop blades? Fine, says AVweb's
Mike Busch, but you're probably ignoring the really important stuff
-- such as the cotter pins and safety wire that prevent critical
nuts and bolts (like the ones that hold on the wings, tail surfaces
and wheels) from coming off in flight. With the ink still wet on
his A&P ticket, Busch takes you on a detailed walk-around of a
typical GA aircraft (a Malibu Mirage) and points out the hundreds of
"safeties" that the prudent pilot should check before each flight.
________________________
KLYDE MORRIS COMIC STRIP <http://www.avweb.com/klyde>
Klyde straps on a bomb, easily passes through an airport security
checkpoint unchallenged, and then realizes that an ant-sized bomb
really isn't big enough to do much damage...
____________________________________________________________ _______
Reader feedback on AVweb's news coverage and feature articles:
<http://www.avweb.com/toc/avmail.html>
Reader mail has been sparse and uninteresting of late, a situation
we hope to remedy by publishing this issue of AVfalsch.
___________
Short Final
The Short Final editor has disavowed any knowledge of this edition, and
has promised to self-destruct within five seconds if this issue is
published.
________________________________________
Take Your Feedback And Stuff It!
AVfalsch is a once-yearly summary of the latest aviation lies,
rumors, innuendoes, half-truths and outright falsehoods created
for your April Fool's Day reading pleasure. Just in case there
was any doubt in your mind, everything in this issue was completely
bogus, and not a shred of it is true. (Except for the preceding
disclaimer, of course, and let's not forget this parenthetical
expression.)
An expanded and even wilder version (with foolish graphics) can be
found at <http://www.avweb.com/newswire/avfool02.html>. Don't miss
it!
Letters to the editor intended for publication in AVmail should be
sent to <mailto:[email protected]>.
This issue's contributors remain anonymous to protect the guilty.
Have a comment or question? Send it to <mailto:[email protected]>.
____________
SPECIAL NOTE...
This special April Fool's edition of AVweb's AVfalsch is presented
in good humor and in the hope that if we've inadvertently offended
anyone, we managed to inadvertently offend everyone equally. Thanks
for reading AVfalsch, and we'll see you next year.
________________________________________
Copyright (C) 2002, The AVweb Group.
All rights reserved.