View Full Version : French police taser little monkey

19th Dec 2014, 21:36
French police taser little monkey on a chocolate-induced rampage | National Post (http://news.nationalpost.com/2014/12/19/french-police-taser-little-monkey-on-a-chocolate-induced-rampage/)

19th Dec 2014, 21:40
I bet the little monkey went Ape.

19th Dec 2014, 21:59
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, chocolate. :p

19th Dec 2014, 22:12
At least they didn't hang it.

19th Dec 2014, 22:53
"Is this your minkey?"

West Coast
20th Dec 2014, 00:33
What monkey business was it up to?

Loose rivets
20th Dec 2014, 01:46
With a backdrop of guys robbing a bank.

"'av yroo get a li-cense for this minky?"

"ee is not my monky. I just came home one day and he was there."

monkey on a chocolate-induced rampage

Mmm . . . I know someone like that.

20th Dec 2014, 01:47
Does it eat cheese and did it surrender ?

20th Dec 2014, 02:15
What about his EU rights? Surely Brussels has gazetted Monkey rights in place. Can he sue the police who tasered him and the kids who got him hooked on the candy to begin with?

Haven't heard yet of any monkey protests in Marseille trashing shops, looting and burning cars in protest of police brutality. And where's his EU-appointed lawyer?

Boudreaux Bob
20th Dec 2014, 02:30
Must be a different kind of Monkey involved.

20th Dec 2014, 04:31
Did the taser leave a "singe" mark? ;)

20th Dec 2014, 05:24
Was he seen leaving the Elysée Palace wearing a crash helmet ?

20th Dec 2014, 06:42
Was it eating a Chocolate Orang?

20th Dec 2014, 07:43
The monkey was lucky it was in Marseille and not in Hartlepool.

20th Dec 2014, 13:05
What would've happened in Hartlepool? :confused:

Would they've eaten him?

20th Dec 2014, 13:05
The same could be said for the entire population of Marseilles, and not just the monkeys.

20th Dec 2014, 14:42
French police taser little monkey

Jeeze - that's sorta like electric incest, innit.

Boudreaux Bob
20th Dec 2014, 15:15
Only if the Monkey surrendered!

20th Dec 2014, 15:54
It is a pity that the majority of the French couldn't have been so bold in WWII. And, please don't delete this mods it is a historical fact, and I did say 'majority'. There were 1,000's bravely working with the French Resistance.

20th Dec 2014, 16:14
Ah pigboat!
The memories!


20th Dec 2014, 19:01
"Le singe est dans la branche'

Merci Eddie

20th Dec 2014, 19:42
mikedreamer787 wrote:

What would've happened in Hartlepool?

Would they've eaten him?

The Hanging of the Hartlepool Monkey (http://www.historic-uk.com/HistoryUK/HistoryofEngland/The-Hanging-of-the-Hartlepool-Monkey/)

20th Dec 2014, 20:19
The French Police seem adept at the correct weapon selection for crazy animals

French police shoot dead knifeman who was shouting Islamic slogans - Telegraph (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/france/11305974/French-police-shoot-dead-knifeman-who-was-shouting-Islamic-slogans.html)

Boudreaux Bob
20th Dec 2014, 21:30
Ahem......ah....errrrr......Lone Wolf attack perpetrated by a "local" indoctrinated at Home/Mosque/School?

That begins to sound familiar somehow.

20th Dec 2014, 21:45
Define "lone"

20th Dec 2014, 23:02
Marseille, twinned with Hartlepool. ;)

I once tried speaking French in Hartlepool. They couldn't understand a word. They thought I was from Leeds.

21st Dec 2014, 00:18
Thanks Mr stacker.

21st Dec 2014, 21:47
Dijon driver shouting ?Allahu Akbar? ploughs car into pedestrians | News | DW.DE | 21.12.2014 (http://www.dw.de/dijon-driver-shouting-allahu-akbar-ploughs-car-into-pedestrians/a-18145172)

21st Dec 2014, 22:05
The French don't stuff around. Quite admirable.

A driver has been arrested after ramming his car into groups of people in the eastern French city of Dijon whilst shouting "Allahu Akbar" or "God is greatest." 11 people were injured in the incident. There's every chance that he'll have quite a nasty accident, perhaps slipping on a loose tile and banging his head on a corner of the desk as he falls, and perhaps as one of the officers rushes to help him up, he may accidentally, in his haste, get his heavy steel-tipped boot into the fellow's mouth.

These things do happen ...........!

22nd Dec 2014, 10:37
A court report in the Evening Gazette a long time ago. A police officer giving evidence in court stated in that flat no-nonsense tone they use when reciting evidence . . .

"The accused then struck me a violent blow on the knee with his head". Assaulting a police officer got the accused extra time in the nick.

Unfortunately, those days when the 'Black Maria' stalked the streets at 10:40, looking for drunks and scallywags are long gone. As have the long morning queues at the Magistrates Courts. Police officers now only emerge from their Police Stations in patrol cars, with blue lights flashing - reactive policing has replaced the pro-active kind.

Consequently, the drunks, drug pushers and scallywags no longer have fear of the police, nor any respect for the law. To which we now have to add, religious fanatics.

Queen Mary would have burned them at the stake. :suspect: