A Job that actually means something

[David Aames]

Hi,

I have been thinking about this for a while now and thought it might be good to put it to you all.

At present I fly a big aircraft for a big company and although the package is good and the opportunity to build a long career here exists, its missing something far more important.

Its just a job, the passion for flight and aviation has gone, as those more experienced than me said it would when I started out on this career.

:(

So I knew this day was coming but now its here, I would gladly trade the money and benefits to really look forward to going flying (not to work) and feel passionate again about what I do.

The thought occurred to me that rather than just flying passengers around, the same thing day in, day out, would it be possible to find a flying job that actually made a difference?

Search and rescue, fire fighting, medvac, something where you can go home at night and feel proud about what you did that day, rather than just another day on the line.

I appreciate that some years ago if I read a post like this on PPrune while I aspired to reach where I am today, i would have thought, this person needs to be thankful for what they have.

I am thankful, but its me thats worked hard to get here and made the sacrifices we all have, to get to a particular point in your career.

So this isn't really a question, more of a, does this really have to be it? Anyone else wonder if there is more to work, flying? Anyone who has thrown in what is 'perceived' to be a goal in aviation (flying big planes) for a job thats more rewarding and was it worth it?

I look forward to any views :E

[mikedreamer787]

I went through the same "job menopause" a few years ago, wanting to use my skills to do something useful instead of making a stinking bunch of rich airline executives richer.
With me it was medvac or similar in Africa.

But don't worry it'll pass. Give it a year or two.

[Dash8driver1312]

Whenever I have the odd crisis of faith, I go spend time in the arrivals hall. Seeing the families and friends meeting each other reminds me that "just bussing people about" makes a huge difference too...

[A320baby]

Dash where's the like button, this is exactly what I do

[DMN]

I did medevac flying in Western Canada, now 747s for an Asian airline.
Although I had a good time, helping people, challenging flying.... I'll take an airliner any time. Comfort, safety, 4 engines, apu, steady schedule, money. You get none of those things flying medevacs. Being on call gets old real quick. Not to mention being awaken at 4am, middle of winter to fly into some ****ty airstrip with non existant snow removal and no refueling facilities. I did 4000h of that kind of flying and that's better left for young dudes aspiring to move on.

[PURPLE PITOT]

Go to the bank. Withdraw 1 months salary in cash. Take it home, and stare at it until your dilemma goes away.:ok:

[R T Jones]

Go to the bank, withdraw one months salary in cash and give it to charity.

Or train to become a doctor.

[Greenlights]

Hi David!
Know a lot what you mean. I felt the same quite quickly, especially when flying for a LCC, there is nothing meaningfull to me...I felt like being a "bus driver", due to short turns around (30 minute).
Nowayday, the objective is to make money for the owner, work fast for them and make them rich. The work becomes the center or everything and not the human being. It is sad.

At first I was thinking the same, try to think that I bring pax to see their families etc...but it is hard to keep these thoughts, cause I was feeling that I take passengers only because they pay my flight and my work so cheap...they don't care at all...they only want to fly cheaper and cheaper and go on holidays, cheaper than by car now.

IN the same time, leaving an airline carier for medevac for exemple, is risky.

If you really want to do a meaningful job, than you should change career like environmental scientist, or medical field, etc...that would be a lot of work.
and you can fly beside your job.

Or you keep your current job (best option), and do some extra activities ( charity etc), open a business beside.

Generally we become pilot because we are egoist.
We want to fly, we want the best view, we want to have emotions....and in the same time we make a lot of POLLUTION in the skies.
so let's face it, when become pilot, it is not to make pleasure to passengers but to make pleasure ourselves first.

I am a sensitive person about environment and I get quite guilty about that too.
There are many LCC now, and their objective is only to make money, they don't care how bad is it for environment.
And pilots follow them...

A former airline pilot speaks out | Aviation Justice (http://aviationjustice.org/2012/02/21/former-airline-pilot-speaks-out/)

http://2cycle2gether.com/2012/01/racing-to-the-bottom-realities-of-life-as-an-airline-pilot/#.U6cRV_l_ufY

Honestly, despite I understand you, you should keep your current job, and try to do others meaning ful activities beside.
As you said, it's jsut a job, so Just work for the money and use it in a good manner. ;)

[Luke SkyToddler]

Have some kids, it's much easier to convince yourself of why do you put up with all the :mad: when it's for their benefit not yours

[Lightheart]

Hi David,

Passion is a good indicator that we are on the right path. Many years ago I lost my passion in my first career, then moved to aviation (which at the time was an unfulfilled passion from childhood).

I believe that you may be becoming aware of a higher purpose for you on this planet. Have you ever thought about why you are here? I can assure you it's not about the accumulation of possessions or social status or any other ego-based thinking.

Most of humanity think that it's about having, then doing and being. But it's actually the other way around.

What do you want to BE? Not talking about a job, I'm talking about an aspect of divinity. What aspect of divinity do you want to be, to project to humanity?....love, service, patience, tolerance, compassion...etc You will need to self-inquire.

A doingness will arise from that, for your work is a way of being what your spiritual journey is inviting you to be...your idea with regard to why you are doing it and who you are in relationship to that reason.

I hope my words will be of some use to you.

[Artie Fufkin]

What happens if (when?) you loose your passion for your new job-that-actually-means-something?

[Lightheart]

Life is always changing, always evolving. Many times what was appropriate for us at one time ceases to be in the future. It is time to change.

Again, who do you want to BE now?

Formulate an empowering question and ask it. Like "how can I best serve humanity through aviation?" Behind every question there's an answer trying to reveal itself. Behind every answer there's an action trying to be taken. Behind every action there's a way of life trying to be born.

We're not trying to make something happen while we stay the same, but making something welcome while it transforms us via its manifestation.

The answer to your question is in the question itself.

[Blantoon]

Cryptic bull**** that should be on a cringe inducing motivational poster rather than pprune aside, how about going part time? You'll keep the lifestyle, comforts and financial security for your family while gaining some spare time to do medevac or build wells in africa or volunteer at your local hospital to give someting back.

[Flaperon75]

Go to the bank. Withdraw 1 months salary in cash. Take it home, and stare at it until your dilemma goes away.

Ha! I love that post Purple Pilot. I might take your advice and do that.

There are times in this career when it can be tiring, when you miss family and friends, when your alarm goes off at 4:30am AGAIN, when you feel you are shuffling from airport to plane to hotel to airport to plane. It can grind you down.

I had a proper 'office job' in a previous life and I wouldn't swap to go back to that life in a million years.

[AirRabbit]

Hi David:

First, I think you probably would like to know that almost everyone here has had “feelings” just like, or very much like, those you have described. The interesting fact is that while many have had the same or similar feelings – almost everyone has a slightly different answer.

For me it was recognizing how I felt about those I’ve met in this profession – I suppose it’s similar to most other professions … you run across the good, the bad, and the mediocre – and mediocre isn’t a ‘bad” term – just sort of “in the middle, between good and bad.” For me, I always preferred concentrating on the really good ones, and letting the others just melt into history … and I guess it was primarily due to the fact that those “good ones” were the ones who taught me something … and what they taught was surprisingly simple … but when I thought on it a while, I recognized that I would likely have never recognized how simple it really was without that person pointing it out – the way he/she did.

Not all of them were involved specifically in the business of teaching – at least not teaching me – but they weren’t hesitant about offering comments or suggestions or personal stories in the vein of “…I learned about flying from that…” Of course, I had always had an interest in teaching – In fact, I did it for a while - teaching math to high school students. But flying was always lurking. When I got out of the service, (US Air Force pilot) having nothing else lined up, I found myself at the local GA airport and talking with some of the folks that were “around.”

It didn’t take long before I was teaching flying for Mary Gaffney’s Flight School. You may or may not recognize her name, but for quite a while she was certainly one of the best, and there were many who though she was the very best, female stunt pilot in the world. Soon I moved on toward doing similar kinds of jobs in airplanes a bit bigger and a bit faster. I won’t bore you with the details … but I soon realized that teaching and testing pilots became THE thing that was my “nitch” – and by teaching and testing, I found that it really allowed me to feel that I was “making a difference.” I can’t imagine what it would be like to go to work – regardless of the type of work – and not feel like what I’m doing, every day, has the sole purpose of providing a living. Don’t get me wrong … making an honest living is a pretty darn good goal. But for me, I wanted a bit more … well … self-rewarding.

I don’t mean wanting to have someone give you “plaques” or “letters of appreciation” or “blue ribbons” or “instructor of the year” citations. Those are all nice – some are really nice – but that’s not what I was doing it for. I was doing it for the no-holds-barred, honest recognition, that I was able to help pilots actually “fly the airplane” better, more consistently – help pilots understand that there ARE situations beyond their ability, and helping them KNOW that the ability to recognize such situations is nothing to be embarrassed about or a reason for feeling shamed, or incompetent – quite the contrary – recognizing situations that may well be beyond one’s talent and ability is the epitome of exercising sound judgment and putting safety first. Also, there is nothing quite like showing a student something about any particular airplane – my absolute favorite, is showing a pilot how to make consistently good landings – and ensuring that they KNOW that a consistently good landing is not necessarily the “greased on” landing, which always seems to be the sought after “mark of a good pilot.” I take it personally when a student can come to grips that consistently good, firm, “no-doubt-we’re-on-the-ground” landings, at the proper attitude and the proper location ON the runway are the true marks of a good pilot.

For what it may be worth, I’d recommend you take a look at what it is about flying that you enjoy – what days have you gone home feeling very good about your work product that day. Don’t focus on when you went home feeling bad … only those days that you left work feeling good – about the day and about yourself. THEN go back and re-think that day’s activities and pick out those things that happened and what role you had in those specific things.

I’ll bet you that the 2 things you will feel the best about are:

1) when you can recall a relatively complicated sequence of events through which you were “on top” of all of the situations that developed … when you went from one situation or circumstance to the next, confidently and correctly (likely on either a departure or arrival/approach/landing) … and you recognize, perhaps most significantly, that you would very likely go back and do exactly what you did if you had the chance to do it all over again; and

2) the times when you were able to explain something to the guy/gal in the other seat … (either explaining something or showing them something or guiding them through something they were doing) and you could see the “light-bulb” of recognition illuminate and the slight smile that crept across their face when “they got it.”

IF either of these are recognized … I’d recommend that you seriously consider talking to someone about getting into the training/checking business. If you don’t have any of those kinds of days … if you don’t recall any such pleasant memories … if you’d rather not have to tell someone how to do something they should already know how to do … then I’d recommend NOT expressing an interest in training/checking and take the advice that you’ll likely see posted here from others.

Either way – you’re not the first and you won’t be the last aviator who’s found themselves confronting the same kind of “does this really have to be it?” question. And, of course, you’re more than welcome to ask other questions if you’d like. As I say, I really like this profession – and I’m happy to help others feel the same way if possible.

[Fair_Weather_Flyer]

I wouldn't be too keen to give up a good aviation job for something something that sounds more idealistic. I have done medevac and flying instruction and can say that these can be just as greedy and ruthless organisations as airlines. I quickly learned that ideals don't make an airplane fly, it's money.

Be thankful for what you have.

[mikedreamer787]

As I alluded to in my 1st post Mr Aames - its just a phase you are going through like many of us've already done. In a year or 2 you will be past it and soldier on as usual without giving it a second thought.

"Job menopause" I called it and an apt description IMO although "midlife crisis" would not be far off the mark neither. Read what the blokes have writ above on Medivac....they aren't pulling your leg.

[Cliff Secord]

Are you in the UK? If you jack it in can I have your job? I work out of some armpits and would give all me teeth to get back to UK to be near family and people who care about me. Then aviation would be doing good as would them happy. You can happily have my lot flying into the swamps, knock yourself out :}

[Holyjoe]

Take some time out David and do something else. Do your company offer periods of unpaid leave? I did my other "thing" yesterday and literally felt overwhelmed by the sense of well being after. It makes me acutely aware how lucky I am and how I should never take anything for granted. Use what you have to do good for others.nobody benefits if you just leave. Pm me and will give you few ideas about the stuff me and my better half get involved with.
Good luck

[flieng]

Hot air balloon pilot mate, seems to make a direct difference to the folks I,ve flown, some of whom are terminal cases. if I could afford probably pack the airline thing in to do it full time.

[WHYEYEMAN]

David, with all due respect, you sound like a 6 year old who has become bored of his Christmas present.

You can afford to do some GA in your spare time if you want to do some aeros.

I would advise you to be less obsessed with yourself and take a look around. Of course it's only a job. Everyone has a job and most people's jobs are crap but it pays the bills. We are lucky enough to have a bloody good one. :ok:

[hifly787]

Not even a 6 year old . Typical of someone who came in only for the money.

[Greenlights]

We are lucky enough to have a bloody good one.

come on...it's only your opinion.
what is a good job for you ? some pilots (many) do not have a bloody good one.

[ShyTorque]

Do your company offer periods of unpaid leave?

Not often workable because of loss of currency.

My company would offer me one just period of unpaid leave. If I told them I wanted to take one it would start when they (i.e. ME) found a replacement pilot for them and last for eternity.

[Holyjoe]

Some companies (mine included) offer unpaid leave. Yes its a hit to the paypacket but when my kids were young, its the only way we managed juggling everything as a family. Our daughter was very ill in the first two years so nothing else mattered to be fair.
Sometimes the pace of the job just doesnt leave you time to get head space, especially if you are sharing childcare etc with a partner who also works.

[blind pew]

you wouldn't be unique David, I went through and am still questioning myself and the industry.
I had many knock backs and eventually got to Hamble where the same circle of highs and lows continued as it did in BEA. I joined the BALPA technical committee but gave that up as I thought that the CAA were the people to improve our standards...talk about naive.
Borrowed the money to get an instructors rating...changed my philosophies (and my line flying) and have spent 15 years teaching various aviation disciplines (mostly at my expense).
I suppose the most rewarding experience was a "trial lesson" in a winch launched glider with a guy who had been blinded as the result of a hospital cock up...looped the glider...he cried and after I helped him out on the ground he gave me a bear hug, lifted me up with tears streaming down his face and thanked me.
The gliding world need instructors and tug pilots...there are a couple of charities which help handicapped people fly (again).

I've always considered myself extremely fortunate and felt it is a "duty" to share my luck with others...class a, microlights, gliders and paragliding..plus I wrote an autobiography but had to cut out the important part - plus ca change c'est la meme chose - because of the libel threat.
I've changed companies - and never flew the same aircraft for longer than 6 years - which helped but still got bored. Just after I got my command (after more than 20 years in the industry) I lost my license...now that is a real kick in the gonads...but there is so many other fulfilling flying opportunities including radio control planes.
I've got too old too teach people in the air because I have started making mistakes but can still help out in other ways.
Have a look at what Guy Westgate does...that will open your eyes..he got me into aerobatics and paragliding...cost me the tow and a fiver towards the glider cost....
good luck

[David Aames]

Thank you everyone for all your responses.

It has been very interesting to read your replies and I appreciate people taking the time to put thoughts down.

In true PPrune tradition, 99% superb replies and two posts making assumptions about the posters motives/personality.

I don't want to get into a tit for tat, and of course you are entitled to your opinion, but it is precisely because I don't feel I am doing something worthwhile that I asked for advice!

I am fortunate to be in this position, but that doesn't change the fact that I feel I should be doing something to help people, or do something more, that was after all, the point of the post, it wasn't about me being selfish, quite the opposite.

:ugh:

I became a pilot because I LOVED flying, I loved it, talked about it all day long with friends, bored the family with it, you know what I mean :-)

I certainly didn't get into it for the money!

You must be pulling my leg ;)

To those who took time to offer solutions and kindly offered for me to pm them, thank you and I will be in touch soon.

God bless PPrune.

[WX Man]

I work for one of these companies, flying King Airs. I have been flying King Airs for FAR TOO BLOODY LONG now.

Sure, it's great to do for a couple of years, and the first 2 years I had batting around Europe, doing VFR when I could, earning reasonably decent money, was great. But then I started to want a proper job.

To cut a long story short, I can't get a "proper" job, basically because it's cheaper for EZY and RYR to employ people straight out of flying school than to employ people like me. Being the "wrong side of 30", and the "wrong side of 300 hours", I'm now a training risk. Funny how the goalposts have moved since I finished my training. I now cannot advance in my career, and for me the only option if I'm ever to hit a salary of £100K (which is my intention by the time I'm 40) is to change career.

Trust me, if you want a job that "means something" (like mine), you need to accept everything else that goes with it:

- working for a company where there are no career prospects
- a really lax attitude towards Flight Duty Periods
- no union recognition, meaning that the pay will be sh*t
- no other benefits

So I very much "like" the poster above who recommended taking out a month's salary in cash and staring at it until your desire to have a job like mine goes away.

[GlueBall]

Stay with your "big company" flying "big planes," (presumedly long haul) because short haul is crap, and corporate is more work than play. :ooh:

[Exascot]

It is a difficult one Dave. I used to get the 'hands on' flying fix by dropping parachutists. However the thing that got to me in the end was the scheduling. It was all fair but I can't sleep during the day and triple night flights were killing me. I was so tired it was making me ill. I was lucky as we have no children. We sold our large house in the UK and moved to a small place in the mountains here in Greece. No water, no electricity, no road, no nothing! It is a very economical way to live but not for everyone. Living most of the year in Botswana is even cheaper but we do have a large estate there to maintain. I used my knowledge of the travel business gained whilst flying and my business qualifications to set up a small tour operators business. I get my flying fix with the bush pilots down south. I am also now on two pensions. The latter needs your attention if you decide to chuck in the towel.

Good luck, whatever you decide :ok:

[WX Man]

Exascot... you sound like a legend. Good on you mate.:D

[Mister Geezer]

David

I fly a widebody and whilst I still very much enjoy the travelling aspect of the job and getting out and doing and seeing new things when down route, I find the majority of my time in the seat is pretty mundane. Long periods of time sitting with low workload and simply monitoring in the cruise. It won't get better.

In order to tackle that, I recently got back into light aircraft flying again and it was a massive breath of fresh air. No automation and a endless list of rules and SOPs to worry about. I get the same buzz as I did hiring a light single when I was a PPL.

I lived to work when I was younger but now I work to live. Give yourself something new to focus on outside of flying. Learn a new language or a new skill or do something different which will be stimulating and rewarding. It could even lead to a new business opportunity.

[mrwebs]

Coming from STOL turboprop ops to the wide body Airbus fleet myself, I feel some of what you are expressing. I think often of the times whe people were happy to see you because their community would struggle to cope without you flying in mail, medication, produce etc. We were respected and looked after by our clients even if the salary was relatively abysmal.

However.. money doesnt buy happiness but I will settle for being sad in luxury!

For your consideration: The Middle-eastern company I work for now, which we apparently cannot name under pain of death :rolleyes: , is soon supposedly starting a "part time" program for capts who are over 50 and have served over 3 years online.

Its one month on-one month off. You'll only get paid for the month you work but thats no biggy if all your ducks are in a row. That should give you enough time per year to accomplish whatever it is that will give you fulfillment.

Im not eligible for it myself as im too young and too much of an FO.. im sure some of the more savant personalities will have enough to say on the matter if probed..

good luck

[lingdee]

I think before someone think and question himself about this career like david, you should think hard before you even want to start in this industry.

The moment you decide to be a pilot, you will have to expect : -

1) your job is routine and repetitive
2) Your promotion, pay check, your life and roster is being decide by management
3) your annual leave, where you base, what aircraft you fly and many more is being decide by other people and your job is to only take instruction from people forever so long you are in this career ( maybe till 65 )

The above you can see in other middle east and hkg threads, where they fly for the biggest airline and yet cry like a baby asking where is my payrise? inflation ? work overtime and force to fly more hours bla bla bla

Point is, before you get yourself into a position like david, it depend on how smart and how ambitious are you?

Everyone knows that it's good to work smart and not hard.

That is why the airline executive and management is making tons of money.

Sure, if the airline were to be bankrupt, their Swiss bank is already stashed with cash or if there are any accident like MH 370 and air france, insurance pay and compensate. After all, a pilot life is worth a cheap 60 months salary. ( basic pay )

If you are a smart person, you are being driven and served and not the other way round.

Think tim clark of Emirates, richard brandson of virgin or tony of air asia.

If you love to fly, you can always be like john travolta and may others, who buy their own jet and fly anytime they like.

So it depends on whether you want to lead a life taking instructions forever and in some cases spoil your health too and pay back medical in the future.

Trust me, waking up at 3am for a 6 am flight or doing red eyes flight 3 times in a row is not fun and damaging to our health. Not to mention the 30 min turnaround time and the occasional 6 sectors per day. It's like working so hard but making someone else rich.

Everyone is born the same with 2 hands, 2 legs and 2 eyes.

It's the choice you make and the above is the ugly truth.

[biggles61]

Having had a forced break from flying for 9 years (medical) made me really appreciate being a professional pilot. I did not know how good it was until it was taken away. That's my two cents worth.

[Greenlights]

Lingdee, spot on mate ! :ok:

Think 100% the same. That's why I left the airline for a business...but the business side is hard work too, at least at first. But I know why I get up in the monrning. I may come to fly again but just because I have the choice and I want to, not because i have to...

The question is : do I want to be a real leader or a slave (or employee if you prefer the term).

Many think that being captain is being a leader, but it is simply a magical powder thrown to eyes by the airlines Human ressources to make you feel an important person and satisfied one. But it's false. Nowaydays even as a captain, you're not leader at all, but only a SOP robot.
If things go wrongs, sure you will start to use brain at 200%, but in 0.001% case. and if things go really wrong, anyway, you'll die...so...

Do not come in this industry, with a leadership mentality, or you will get bored really fast.
It's better to come in this industry with a military mentality meaning, you like receiving orders and execute them as a little soldier.

But for those who are already in this industry, however don't leave without planning a real way out. Open a business while you fly, and get out once your business is running enough to live. Personnally I left a bit too early so it was hard work to make my business run.

[de facto]

A simple case of burnout maybe?
Take two months off,go have some fun as far as possible from aircraft and
do not read/talk about aviation.
When you get back to work,if you are still not enjoying then maybe a more permanent change may be necessary.
Good luck.

[EMB-145LR]

I was in exactly the same position as the OP at the beginning of this year. I've been flying turboprops and then an RJ since 2008. I've been an FO for all of that time. I've interviewed twice for one of my dream jobs over the last couple of years and have fallen at the last hurdle both times. I was feeling rather sorry for myself, very lackluster and stale, and just felt that I wasn't making a difference in the world.

In April I decided a change was in order and I took a months leave unpaid. After three weeks I found I was really missing flying. I went back in mid May and put a fleet change request in. I've just finished my conversion course for my new type and have fallen in love with flying all over again. If you have the option to switch fleets, I'd say go for it!

But more than anything else I would say that my month off gave me time to really reflect on what is important to me. Flying is all I had ever wanted to do, and I was distraught that I was bored. Then I realised, I'd built it up so much that it was consuming my life. Family are the centre of my world now, flying is just my job, an extremely enjoyable job, but no longer something I pin all my hopes and desires on. I'm very content now, all that was really required was a change in perspective.

I've recently volunteered to give talks at schools and universities and already I am finding it very rewarding to encourage a new generation of pilots.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do. I think most airline pilots reach this point at some time in their careers.

[AirRabbit]

The moment you decide to be a pilot, you will have to expect : -

1) your job is routine and repetitive
2) Your promotion, pay check, your life and roster is being decide by management
3) your annual leave, where you base, what aircraft you fly and many more is being decide by other people and your job is to only take instruction from people forever so long you are in this career ( maybe till 65 )

With all due respect, lingdee, I would suggest that your statement could just as easily have been the following:

Unless you own and operate your own company, the moment you decide to be a (fill-in-the-blank – school teacher, doctor, lawyer, sales agent, astronaut, ditch digger, etc.), you will have to expect:
1) Your job will be routine and repetitive (unless you have a unique ability to recognize the possibility of the vast amount of potentials)-
2) Your promotion, pay check, your life, and roster will be decided by management (unless of course you bring a new, exciting, more simple structure, a better approach, or some other job-improvement idea to the table)-
3) Your annual leave, to some degree at least, where you live, what equipment you will use and many more issues will be decided by other people, and your job will be to take instruction from people forever so long you are a (fill-in-with-same-job-function) (probably ‘till you retire) -(unless, of course, and again, you are able to recognize the potentials, and for some, or all of those potentials, are able to provide a newer, better, easier, more effective, less costly method to accomplish the same job functions).

There is no job, no profession, no "calling," that is insulated from the above-mentioned factors. Some people believe they must keep their "nose to the grind stone" and "their shoulder to the wheel," and must not recognize what is happening, and where or how or if ... they may have ideas that are worth exploring, any one of which might put the whole function into a new category of operation. Imagination is available to all who recognize that fact ... and imagination, simply by its definition, cannot be held within boundaries defined by "other" persons.

[No Fly Zone]

Give it a little time. Call it a mid-life crises if you wish, and ride it out for a while. If you still feel this way in a year, then perhaps you should be flying commercially and might consider a different line of work. Like most professions, driving big airplanes is often routine and often boring, with moments of both terror and great pleasure. If someone promised you life of constant glitz, glamor, bling, the ideal salary and perfect Quality of Life, I think you got lied to - or chose to park your common sense. Slightly more mature thinking may help you. ;)