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SOPS
14th Apr 2014, 17:28
So, I'm a bit confused. I assume now that I am allowed to tell my Bride of 29 years that I'm knocking off the girl down the road....but not on a regular basis...so it's all ok. And by the way..would you do a quick photo shoot with me, holding hands so we can prove we are still in love?

I know what the answer would be, it would involve a rusty nife, bits of me I don't care to be without, and a threat of a lot of pain.

My affair with Rebekah Brooks was wrong, Andy Coulson tells court | Mail Online (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2604338/My-affair-Rebekah-Brooks-wrong-Im-sorry-pain-caused-wife-Andy-Coulson-tells-court.html)

Capetonian
14th Apr 2014, 17:34
It can't be classified as an affair when the other party is someone as repellent as that Brooks woman.

It's one or all of : a gross (pun intended) error of judgement, a temporary mental aberration, or masochism.

tony draper
14th Apr 2014, 17:41
They's posh folks,it's normal for them,they shag each others wives and share the bairns out at Christmas.
:uhoh:

VP959
14th Apr 2014, 20:19
Admiral Drapes wrote:
They's posh folks,it's normal for them,they shag each others wives and share the bairns out at Christmas.

Reminds me of a short stint I did as Divisional Officer for a small RN team (whilst still very young and inexperienced), split into two watches, who worked alternately between a base in Cornwall and one in the far north west of Scotland. One week I had both watches back at base in Cornwall, and at lunchtime a fight broke out between two killicks. A PO separated them and paraded them to my desk in turn, together with my (very experienced) Fleet Chief.

I asked each in turn what they had to say for themselves, and why they had been fighting. The answer from each was similar. Apparently they'd had an arrangement where when each was away in Scotland the other would pop in and "service" his oppo's wife. This was fairly normal, back then wives in need of a bit of company would stick an OMO box in the front window, meaning "On My Own".

I assumed the fight was over this, so asked the second killick why he'd suddenly taken offence at this long standing "arrangement". His answer was very frank: "It's not me missus, Sir, he's me oppo and that's OK. It's because the bastard's been shagging me girlfriend in Applecross, Sir".

It was at this point that I dismissed the two killicks for the time being and decided to consult my Fleet Chief as to the best course of action. He wisely suggested that I send them off to the Commander's Desk the following morning for discipline, with a recommendation of a weeks stoppages for each.

A few months later I had occasion to stay at the Applecross Hotel, and couldn't help but try and seek out the identity of the disputed girlfriend. It turned out she worked there, and had to be at least 18 stone............

ShyTorque
14th Apr 2014, 21:02
What about the Bill Clinton approach? It's not drug taking if you don't inhale.

By those rules, surely it's not an affair if she didn't swallow...

Windy Militant
14th Apr 2014, 22:46
The Late Ms McColl sums it up nicely! ;)

Kirsty MacColl - My Affair - YouTube

Fox3WheresMyBanana
14th Apr 2014, 22:52
Marvellous - she bought me a drink once, at one of her concerts.
RIP :{

If I wanted a drink out of Andy Coulson, I'd have to stick my fingers down his throat.

con-pilot
14th Apr 2014, 23:18
Back in the day, early 70s, I was a pilot on a group of corporate jets* taking a wedding party to Las Vegas. The groom was a young, way too wealthy for his own good and a spoiled brat to be honest. The bride was some young thing that I thought didn't have a brain under her dyed blond hair or above her faked boobs.

The first night we were there the bride caught her fiance with a hooker, in their suite, that's how stupid this guy was.

He started shouting that 'Hookers and blow jobs don't count!'

Well to her they did, she went home on the airlines and the rest stayed in Las Vegas to party.



* Two Lear 24s, a Lear 25 and two Jet Commanders, I was flying one of the Jet Commanders. We flew the Jet Commanders in formation to Las Vegas, I flew wingman, because I didn't trust the guy flying the other Commander when it came to formation flying. Come to think of it, I didn't trust him period. :p

Hydromet
14th Apr 2014, 23:23
CP, sounds like the second bang was the door closing (behind the bride on her way home).

acbus1
15th Apr 2014, 06:27
...in need of a bit of company would stick an OMO box in the front window
Probably means something else these days. :rolleyes:


Countdown to deletion: Ten...nine...eight...

radeng
15th Apr 2014, 10:41
Cape,

>It can't be classified as an affair when the other party is someone as repellent as that Brooks woman.<

If you have enough beer, they become beautiful - or so I'm told.

MagnusP
15th Apr 2014, 11:37
I agree with radeng; after all, we've all made that mistake.

http://giantgag.files.wordpress.com/2014/02/giantgag-com-funny_oh-my-god-i-m-never-drinking-again_011.jpg?w=700

MagnusP
15th Apr 2014, 11:52
Sorry. I realise that, in my last post, I inadvertently missed out our Welsh and Kiwi contributors. Allow me to make amends.


http://www.meemes.com/sites/default/files/styles/large/public/Cat_Sheep.jpeg?itok=YVgUjG4b

rgbrock1
15th Apr 2014, 12:00
radeng wrote:

If you have enough beer, they become beautiful - or so I'm told.

These parts it's also known as the Budweiser Goggle Syndrome.