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coldair
12th Dec 2013, 09:55
If you were to come back as an animal, what would it be and why ?




I'd like to come back as a dog with a waggy tail, a great family to look after me and a few neighborhood cats to give me fun and exercise.

The SSK
12th Dec 2013, 09:59
A Tyrannosaurus Rex, please.

Lon More
12th Dec 2013, 10:00
Better not ask Prince Charles, he had some strange ideas.

A cat, I think. Do what I want when I want. Always a nice warm lap to curl up on, Scratch the nose of that blasted dog next door and have nine lives to ensure get away with it.

A Tyrannosaurus Rex Bit difficult I think. Surely a Tory politician is the same thing?

sitigeltfel
12th Dec 2013, 10:00
Not sure what I would like to be, but I think I would discount the ones that spend half the day licking their own arses.

Lon More
12th Dec 2013, 10:04
Surely a step up for some here? To be able to lick their own bollox instead of just talking it? :E

500N
12th Dec 2013, 10:06
A dog as described by the OP

or a Golden Eagle or Peregrine Falcon.


Not too sure I need the ability of the post above ;)

Cyber Bob
12th Dec 2013, 10:41
Knowing my luck - I'll come back as myself!

tony draper
12th Dec 2013, 11:22
A tree,you can watch all those talking monkeys who used to live in your hair make a total arse of living on the ground.
:rolleyes:

Blacksheep
12th Dec 2013, 11:45
A chihuahua. Or a cat.

Either way, spoiled rotten, so they are.

Yesterday our cupboard was bare, so Missus made my sandwiches with left over dog food.

A very nice bit of roast chicken breast it was, too. ;)

airship
12th Dec 2013, 12:15
Drapes wrote: A tree... :(

Whatever, I think I'd like to have a go being reincarnated as one of those N. American cicadas who seemingly hibernate safely underground for between 13 to 17 years before re-emerging. Just that I'm feeling quite fed-up and very tired of being one of those "higher life-forms". As a human-being, having to wake up each day, go out and work for cretins, pay taxes, see others "live" on the fruits of my labours. Being sprayed with DDT and other horrors, if not simply swatted as a mosquito. Or hunted-down by the likes of Jim Corbett just because I had a few (very painful) porcupine quills embedded in one leg, resulting in my becoming a man-eating leopard or tiger - they could have tranquilised me instead, removing the quills and setting me free again, or at least putting me in a nice spacious park, fed once a day, where I could end my days gracefully...?! :sad:

I need a break from this cruel world! :{

goudie
12th Dec 2013, 12:26
A lion, I fancy. Dining on juicy zebra steaks, surrounded by attentive and submissive females, dozing in the shade of a tree or surveying one's kingdom from a rocky outcrop.
Sounds good to me:ok:

vulcanised
12th Dec 2013, 12:30
An Albatross.

If I come back as John Wayne will that be reintarnation?

OFSO
12th Dec 2013, 12:45
I got my wish in my last life, and am now having fun in this one.

(And yes, I do say thanks every day for that !)

27mm
12th Dec 2013, 13:39
I would like to return as a Ladies bicycle saddle.......:E

Dak Man
12th Dec 2013, 13:55
A dolphin I think, my life would then have some porpoise.....

I'll get my coat.....

Limeygal
12th Dec 2013, 14:14
A bird I think. An eagle perhaps. A cat is tempting, but like some of you, I am not into the whole bum licking thing either. :yuk:

Capetonian
12th Dec 2013, 14:16
A tortoise or a panda. All you have to do is eat and sleep. Nobody bothers you.

Ancient Mariner
12th Dec 2013, 14:17
A great white shark, please. Me, an apex predator. :E
Per

Ancient Observer
12th Dec 2013, 14:22
What animals turn in to Politicians after their reincarnation?

racedo
12th Dec 2013, 14:52
I would like to return as a Ladies bicycle saddle.......http://images.ibsrv.net/ibsrv/res/src:www.pprune.org/get/images/smilies/evil.gif

http://cdn.bikechatforums.com/files/fat-girl-riding-a-bicycle.jpg

racedo
12th Dec 2013, 14:53
What animals turn in to Politicians after their reincarnation?

Thats easy........................Snakes.

goudie
12th Dec 2013, 14:59
What animals turn in to Politicians after their reincarnation?

Chameleons!

vulcanised
12th Dec 2013, 15:19
Thanks racedo I've just lost the will to live.

Or at least, be reincarnated.

meadowrun
12th Dec 2013, 15:27
This might belong in the How to leave an Employer thread but once told a soon to be ex-boss that he couldn't be reincarnated as a jackass.

You can't come back as the same thing twice.

Capetonian
12th Dec 2013, 15:35
"You'll like my friend; she has a lovely personality."

You'd have a job finding it amongst all that blubber.

dazdaz1
12th Dec 2013, 15:54
I'd like to come back as a snail, I love sprouts and at the end of that life I wish to be cooked by Michel Roux JR in a little garlic butter served on French toast with a drizzle of extra virgin olive oil served with a side salad of green leaf.

Daz

The SSK
12th Dec 2013, 16:04
More likely a thrush would smash your house to smithereens with you still inside it.

rgbrock1
12th Dec 2013, 16:08
A bald eagle.

http://images.nationalgeographic.com/wpf/media-live/photos/000/000/cache/bald-eagle_1_600x450.jpg

goudie
12th Dec 2013, 16:09
You'd have a job finding it amongst all that blubber. Just say 'fart and give us a clue!'

A bald eagle.

I'm half that in this life!

The SSK
12th Dec 2013, 16:14
You could come back as a dodo.

You wouldn't half get the celebrity treatment when you were rediscovered.

LordGrumpy
12th Dec 2013, 17:56
How about reincarnation as a Dalek that could elevate: one upDalekship on yer mates.

tony draper
12th Dec 2013, 17:56
The world of the nature is red in tooth and claw,best select a critter that is inconspicuous and tastes like shit:uhoh:

VP959
12th Dec 2013, 18:58
I think I'd quite like to come back as a Bonobo

pigboat
12th Dec 2013, 19:46
If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee. (Hardly seems worth it)
A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes. (In my next life I want to be a pig) (How'd they figure this out, and why?)
Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour. (Still can't get over that pig thing) (Don't try this at home...maybe at work?)
Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure. (Is that why Flipper was always smiling?) (And pigs get 30-minute orgasms? Doesn't seem fair)
Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people do. (If you're ambidextrous do you split the difference?)
The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated. (From drinking little bottles of...?) (Did taxpayers pay for this research??)
Polar bears are left handed. (Who knew....? Who cares? How'd they find out, ask them?)
The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds. (What can be so tasty on the bottom of the pond?)
The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field. (30 minutes...can you imagine?? And why pigs?)
A cockroach will live nine days without it's head, before it starves to death. (Creepy) (You've got to wonder about the sick sadist who found this out.)
The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off. (Honey, I'm home. What the....) (Well, at least pigs get a break there...)
Some lions mate over 50 times a day. (In my next life I still want to be a pig...quality over quantity)
Butterflies taste with their feet. (Oh, geez) (That's almost as bad as catfish)
An ostrich's eye is bigger than it's brain. (I know some people like that.)
Starfish don't have brains. (I know some people like that too.) (After reading all these, all I can say is.......Lucky Pigs.) :)

rgbrock1
12th Dec 2013, 19:57
pig boat wrote:

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.Then how is it that my mother-in-law is able to heat 33,573 cups of coffee with her mouth? Hm? One of life's many conundrums I suppose.

I wanna be a lion then. I too want to mate 50 times per day with pigs who have 30 minute orgasms.

goudie
12th Dec 2013, 20:10
I too want to mate 50 times per day with pigs who have 30 minute orgasms.
Then of course, eat the pig. Double bubble, I like it!

Lon More
12th Dec 2013, 20:54
Capetonian wrote A tortoise or a panda. All you have to do is eat and sleep. Nobody bothers you
Surely a panda eats, shoots, and leaves? Not a bad existence.

OFSO
12th Dec 2013, 21:03
I too want to mate 50 times per day with pigs who have 30 minute orgasms.

Well, you don't have to die and be reincarnated as a pig to do that ! Ask any New Zealander...oh, sorry, wrong four-legged animal. My baaaahd.

racedo
12th Dec 2013, 23:28
Thanks racedo I've just lost the will to live.

Or at least, be reincarnated.


Ok that one was too easy. :O

Maybe different one.



http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2010/04/hot-girls-bike-bicycle-15.jpg

airship
13th Dec 2013, 13:13
An important tip to assure successful reincarnation as an animal (instead of a "vegetable") for undetermined period:

http://seducehealth.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/do-not-resuscitate2.gif

PS. Admiral Drapes, may one still call you Olive henceforth...?! ;)

OFSO
13th Dec 2013, 15:36
Nicely sprung rear suspension, Racedo !