View Full Version : Why do you prefer women over aircraft?

29th Sep 2013, 12:54
Fellow PPRuNers

There is a host of reasons (most of them rather corny) why us male pilots prefer aircraft over women, but why do you prefer women over aircraft? What are the pleasant attributes aircraft and women have in common?

To you ladies on this forum: Have you ever received a nice compliment that was somehow related to aircraft or flying?

I'm looking forward to your answers and I hope I might use some of them for a speech in my Toastmasters club.

dubbleyew eight
29th Sep 2013, 13:06
women fit between the sheets better than an aeroplane.
women also wear a bikini better than an aeroplane.
....but I fly aeroplanes.

Airborne Aircrew
29th Sep 2013, 13:11
women don't leave contrails......

Legless ones do... :}

29th Sep 2013, 13:17
Crashing and burning with a woman makes you feel sorry for yourself until you find a beer.
Crashing and burning with an aircraft is a bit more serious.....

Worrals in the wilds
29th Sep 2013, 13:35
Aircraft come with an instruction manual?
Old LAME joke, but it also works for pilots.

29th Sep 2013, 13:36
You can switch Bitchin' Betty off?


29th Sep 2013, 13:37
I suppose the obvious difference is most women don't require a co-pilot or ground crew

Not seperate ones - just one man to be all those plus chauffeur, handyman....

29th Sep 2013, 13:44
Some parts are still unknown!
Fake French clitoris poll fools mocking Italians - The Local (http://www.thelocal.fr/20130927/french-clitoris-poll-gorafi-the-onion-italians-fake-news)

29th Sep 2013, 13:47
89 percent of French men confuse the 'clitoride', which in French is called the 'clitoris', with a car from the Japanese car manufacturer Toyota

And I thought it was a Renault

Bob Bevan
29th Sep 2013, 13:56
They both get better the more you take off!

29th Sep 2013, 14:03
Because a bucking ride with a woman, is much more enjoyable, than a bucking ride with an aircraft!! :)

29th Sep 2013, 14:05
Aircraft can't cook, make the bed, or iron shirts.

29th Sep 2013, 14:20
Women make less noise. Although .... there's my MiL!

B Fraser
29th Sep 2013, 14:47
Renting an aircraft is cheaper than owning one whereas....

wait a moment....

mmmmmmmh :rolleyes:

29th Sep 2013, 14:50
You can control an aircraft...

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30th Sep 2013, 00:27
Why do you prefer women over aircraft?
I don't think I've ever had a woman over an aircraft :(

30th Sep 2013, 01:50

If your audience in the Toastmasters' Club happens to include any ladies I'd be VERY leery of making any either/or comparisons! Similarities yes, perhaps, like dealing with thunderstorms, navigational difficulties, impossible conditions for landing (but without too much discussion of alternates), that sort of stuff.

Good luck and take a flak jacket!

B Fraser
30th Sep 2013, 08:01
On an aircraft, an engineer can stop a crack getting larger by drilling a hole at the end of it.

You can write the next line yourself.

30th Sep 2013, 12:20
You can get blind drunk and the ugliest
woman in the bar will look like a young
Sharon Stone and you'll get your end

You can get blind drunk and the ugliest
aircraft in the hangar will still look like
the ugliest aircraft in the hangar and you
definitely won't get your end away.

Juliet Sierra Papa
30th Sep 2013, 13:21
I'd rather go down on a woman.

30th Sep 2013, 13:54
Dealing with an underwire bra is far more enjoyable than dealing with fly by wire.

When a jet engine on an aircraft blows you, you end up hot and covered in soot.

When a woman ... you may finish this yourself. (Wait, that's what she said! :eek:)

Thomas coupling
30th Sep 2013, 15:04
It's like listening to a bunch of adolescent blokes with special needs trying to out do each other with lame excuses for jokes.
Airborne Aircrew - yours is the only one worth telling :ok:

30th Sep 2013, 15:11
You couldn't think of one then, Thomas?

Personally, I thought AAs was rather coarse.

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30th Sep 2013, 20:57
Aircraft flaps are far too stiff to play with.....:}

30th Sep 2013, 21:28
Hvogt's the toastmaster speech about?

30th Sep 2013, 21:32
I doubt the aircraft would bring you a cup of tea in bed in the morning....

1st Oct 2013, 03:51
Aircraft flaps are far too stiff to play with.....:}

Filthy cnut! ;)

1st Oct 2013, 07:16
The female undercarriage generally requires more maintenance.

1st Oct 2013, 15:29
Looking at the rear end of a 727 really turns me on. After requests and posting my feelings as to the 727 Boeing have banned me from their site.


Lightning Mate
1st Oct 2013, 16:21
The Lightning had wet flaps...........................

1st Oct 2013, 19:38
At least with a Aircraft there is always a reason for it to be late

At least a Airbus uses logic

When you have sex in a car the air bags dont (normally) get in the way

1st Oct 2013, 21:01

you mean there isn't with a woman?

Although the definition of late may be arguable, depending on circumstances.