They nicked my dog and tent ...

[CoffmanStarter]

OK it's Friday ...

The Ministry of Defence closed its UFO desk because it served "no defence purpose" and was taking staff away from "more valuable defence-related activities", newly released files show.

4,400 pages of documents have been released ...

But my particular favourites ...

A report received via the UFO hotline by someone who had been "living with an alien" in Carlisle for some time :D

A UFO seen hovering near the Houses of Parliament :E

A report from a man from Cardiff who claimed a UFO abducted his dog, and took his car and tent, while he was camping with friends in 2007 :eek:

An account from a retired RAF Flight lieutenant who witnessed the tracking of a UFO on airfield radar at RAF Lyneham - a phenomena also sighted visually by two airmen on the ground :uhoh:

BBC News MOD UFO Desk (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-22991014)

National Archives (http://ufos.nationalarchives.gov.uk)

Best ...

Coff.

PS ... Does anyone remember the 70's Zap "UFO's are REAL it's the RAF that's a Hallucination" ... some kind chap stuck one in my SD Cap on the wax lining ... never did get the bloody thing off :ok:

[gr4techie]

Best one I heard..... "Aliens turned my son into a frozen fish finger".

Of course they did ma'am, of course they did.

I always wondered if you could get a desk job reading wacko hippy reports of shape shifting reptilians fighting time traveling nazis on the moon. Must be an amusing posting.

[teeteringhead]

Saw something the other day - Guido Fawkes blog possibly - about a councillor somewhere who claimed to have fathered a "love child" with an alien. Apparently his wife didn't object as the "other woman" was not human (or real, one suspects).

And he is representing voters somewhere??? Will try and find a link.

Found it! Simon Parkes, a Labour councillor in Whitby. Details here! (http://www.theweek.co.uk/people-news/53672/simon-parkes-alien-sex-lovechild)

[TomJoad]

No offence to Nick Pope but why did it take do long to shut this down?

[Wander00]

In a village on the west coast of France near Bordeaux there is a plaque placed by order of the Maire and Council in about 1976 designating the spot as the place where visitors from outer space were to be welcomed.

The village is Ares, the link here

http://invisiblebordeaux.********.fr/2012/06/ovniport-dares-patiently-awaiting-alien.html

instead of * - b l o g s p o t without the gaps

2012/06/ovniport-dares-patiently-awaiting-alien.html

[teeteringhead]

In a village on the west coast of France near Bordeaux Twinned with Whitby I suppose.......;)

[Haraka]

Funnily enough the French, under CNES ( the French Space Agency) fund a cell called GEIPAN to study the UAP phenomenon. Its missions are:

A Scientific attempt to explain strange reported phenomena, response of the French state to questions from the public and analysis of possible risks for Defence.

It does this by:
Collecting UFO sighting reports in France, analyzing collected data to possibly explain them, archiving the sighting reports and informing the public.

Note that it is not under the Defence Ministry.

[sitigeltfel]

I remember the hours wasted while sitting at the Ops desk in HQ1Gp Bawtry, taking down details from these loons.

All that was missing from their phone calls was the sound of banjos in the background.

[Windy Militant]

A report from a man from Cardiff who claimed a UFO abducted his dog, and took his car and tent, while he was camping with friends in 2007 http://images.ibsrv.net/ibsrv/res/src:www.pprune.org/get/images/smilies/eek.gif


I suspect a surfit of Brains here, not in his skull but down his neck. Makes a change to have a skull attack instead of an anal probe. ;)

[CoffmanStarter]

Wander00 old chap ... Good God man it looks more like a Weber BBQ charcoal orb ... something BEagle might use ... you don't suppose ........ :}

http://i1004.photobucket.com/albums/af162/CoffmanStarter/image_zpsadf764c4.jpg

[ShyTorque]

Best one I heard..... "Aliens turned my son into a frozen fish finger".

"So what did you do?"

"Well, after all, a fish finger is a fish finger and it was defrosting......shame to waste it!"

[gr4techie]

A report from a man from Cardiff who claimed a UFO abducted his dog, and took his car and tent, while he was camping with friends in 2007

Coming here and taking the mans tent is crossing the line.

I never knew aliens were into camping.

[CoffmanStarter]

GR4T ... Camp Aliens you say ...

http://img.thesun.co.uk/multimedia/archive/01271/SNA14HEED1---682_1271162a.jpg

:ok:

[gr4techie]

Isn't that a photo of 2 locals near Marham? Or do the locals have webbed feet and 6 fingers?

[gr4techie]

What I have never understood about all these reports... Out every location in the world the aliens could have gone to, from the exotic and beautiful to the scientifically interesting, why would they have travelled all that way to a field near Cardiff? And out of every person in the world they could have met, from world leaders to leading scientists to remarkable people like the Gandhi, why would they have travelled all that way to meet to some random bloke who's out camping with his dog?

I saw one article where a man was allegedly abducted, the aliens took one look at him and then threw him back out on medical grounds. It must be gutting to be rejected even by alien body snatchers.

Some nutter reckoned after he was abducted from his bedroom, the aliens returned him outside of his house when all the doors were locked from the inside.

[TomJoad]

.

Some nutter reckoned after he was abducted from his bedroom, the aliens returned him outside of his house when all the doors were locked from the inside.

Come on gr4techie you are being a wee bit too harsh there fella. I used to find myself outside the house with doors all locked from the inside - usually on my way back from Friday happyhour! Never once claimed the alien abduction defence - damm!:O

[smujsmith]

Coff,

I had a great big badge, I used to wear to open days etc, that read " UFO's are real, the RAF is an Hallucination". For the first year of my tour as a Herk GE it went unnoticed on my grow bag. I had the great pleasure of meeting a Squadron Leader, VC10 Captain, at Dulles in year 2, whilst in the 24th hour of my continuous operation, who took great exception to this, and ordered me to remove it, along with the hat that was protecting my head from sunburn. I hesitate to suggest that VC10 Captains are a bit "up themselves", but, to get so "holier than thou" about a badge was a bit pedantic.

Smudge

[iRaven]

Whenever I hear about this I think of South Park :E

Cartman under Alien Control - YouTube

[CoffmanStarter]

Smudge ... I literally became quite attached to my Cap Zap :ok:

[BEagle]

I had a great big badge, I used to wear to open days etc, that read " UFO's are real, the RAF is an Hallucination". For the first year of my tour as a Herk GE it went unnoticed on my grow bag. I had the great pleasure of meeting a Squadron Leader, VC10 Captain, at Dulles in year 2, whilst in the 24th hour of my continuous operation, who took great exception to this, and ordered me to remove it, along with the hat that was protecting my head from sunburn. I hesitate to suggest that VC10 Captains are a bit "up themselves", but, to get so "holier than thou" about a badge was a bit pedantic.


You mean someone actually ordered you to remove non-military badges from your military clothing? Shock, horror...:eek:

On 101, when down route, our groundcrew wore uniform, squadron pattern flying coveralls and always looked pretty smart. They did not wear any stupid, unofficial badges and were true ambassadors for the squadron and the Service.

[Wensleydale]

Saw something the other day - Guido Fawkes blog possibly - about a councillor
somewhere who claimed to have fathered a "love child" with an alien. Apparently
his wife didn't object as the "other woman" was not human (or real, one
suspects).

And he is representing voters somewhere??? Will try and find
a link.

Found it! Simon Parkes, a Labour councillor in Whitby. Details
here! (http://www.theweek.co.uk/people-news/53672/simon-parkes-alien-sex-lovechild)


Probably seemed like an alien, but a good excuse to the wife during Whitby Goth Week.

http://farm6.staticflickr.com/5139/5565033636_a1ce71d536_z.jpg

[NutLoose]

A report received via the UFO hotline by someone who had been "living with an alien" in Carlisle for some time

But I originate from Carlisle :{

[CoffmanStarter]

Nano Nano Nutty :ok:

[smujsmith]

Hmm, actually Beags, I was in shorts and a tea shirt (because my own Captain had authorised it) both temp and humidity were very high, as you well know Dulles could be like that. At the steps of the beautiful aircraft I awaited the spare that would allow me to fix my aircraft and continue on route. No uniform, no military insignia. My 1250 was sufficient for the loadmaster to hand me the little parcel, hand carried from BZN, to rescue me and my crew. The Captain, who in passing happened to observe that I was a serviceman, and that he did not like the hat, which was protecting my bald head from a raging sun, or the badge. Decided to have a pop. No probs, I had been working since landing, 15 hours before, it was hot, I was ready for the nice hotel that this Captain was about to experience, it was not to be. 2 hours after receipt of my bollocking, we were on our way to Belize. There was no abuse of uniform, no disrespect for my service, and, importantly I complied with everything the Sqn Ldr said. I spent 30 years as an aircraft tradesman in the RAF, and never disrespected my unit or uniform, sorry if I'm biting, but I think you missed my point. As a follow up, a couple of years later, whilst in Africa as part of a disaster relief operation, I once again received a vital spare via VC10 airways. In very similar kit, I was welcomed aboard, offered a cool drink, and treated like a human being. "Nonne omnes sunt equales"

Smudge

PS, I've done some down route ground time with 101 Groundcrew, great lads, and just like us Albert techies really !! See this, about how I was dressed, and blimey 101 squadron!

https://www.gov.uk/government/news/article-raf-technicians-commended-for-keeping-tanker-flying-over-afghanistan

OK I was not in the sand box, but it was bloody hot.

[NutLoose]

On 101, when down route, our groundcrew wore uniform, squadron pattern flying coveralls and always looked pretty smart. They did not wear any stupid, unofficial badges and were true ambassadors for the squadron and the Service.

On the VC10 LSS I used to have a hammer and sickle badge on my overalls, the Sgt rigger on shift had the full furry russian hat with the badge on it, we never had any complaints from any Pax or crew when we were seeing off the jets.

You probably outranked the Ten Captain as most were just bumped up Pilot Officers to Sqn Leader to prevent them defecting to BA at the time.

[gr4techie]

Was that VC10 captain a shape shifting reptilian?

[smujsmith]

Gr4techie,

I suspect that, unlike his aircraft, he did not stop whining after landing. It was no big thing, chap had his own standards.

Smudge

[Haraka]

Keep laughing.
Wait until it happens to you.

[NutLoose]

I remember the hours wasted while sitting at the Ops desk in HQ1Gp Bawtry, taking down details from these loons.

All that was missing from their phone calls was the sound of banjos in the background.


We're you Mulder or Sculley?

[gr4techie]

I remember the hours wasted while sitting at the Ops desk in HQ1Gp Bawtry, taking down details from these loons.

All that was missing from their phone calls was the sound of banjos in the background.

I could imagine it's one of those jobs where you need a lot of patience. Reading through the link Coff provided, one crackpot would not take no for an answer and kept on bombarding the desk with emails and letters about some alleged sighting at Brentwaters, it amazed me how the desk remained professional and were not demeaning or patronising and did not tell him to $%&* off. Even if they have to cut and paste the same reply "thanks for your letter but we are not interested".

[TEEEJ]

Teeteringhead wrote

Simon Parkes, a Labour councillor in Whitby.

He features in the following programme

Confessions of an Alien Abductee - Channel 4 (http://www.channel4.com/programmes/confessions-of-an-alien-abductee)

[NutLoose]

Figures they give some punter on here

http://filestore.nationalarchives.gov.uk/pdfs/ufos/defe-24-2456-1.pdf

Page 164 do not tally with their own estimates on 165

They quote 31/2 days per file but estimate internally 2 days= 14 hours

Mind you to release all the files was 56K

:d

[TomJoad]

Hmm, actually Beags, I was in shorts and a tea shirt (because my own Captain had authorised it) both temp and humidity were very high, as you well know Dulles could be like that. At the steps of the beautiful aircraft I awaited the spare that would allow me to fix my aircraft and continue on route. No uniform, no military insignia. My 1250 was sufficient for the loadmaster to hand me the little parcel, hand carried from BZN, to rescue me and my crew. The Captain, who in passing happened to observe that I was a serviceman, and that he did not like the hat, which was protecting my bald head from a raging sun, or the badge. Decided to have a pop. No probs, I had been working since landing, 15 hours before, it was hot, I was ready for the nice hotel that this Captain was about to experience, it was not to be. 2 hours after receipt of my bollocking, we were on our way to Belize. There was no abuse of uniform, no disrespect for my service, and, importantly I complied with everything the Sqn Ldr said. I spent 30 years as an aircraft tradesman in the RAF, and never disrespected my unit or uniform, sorry if I'm biting, but I think you missed my point. As a follow up, a couple of years later, whilst in Africa as part of a disaster relief operation, I once again received a vital spare via VC10 airways. In very similar kit, I was welcomed aboard, offered a cool drink, and treated like a human being. "Nonne omnes sunt , I equales"

Smujsmith chances are I never served with you, but I know wholeheartedly that I served with others who shared and demonstrated your attitude towards service everyday. I count myself all the better for it. As a wet behind the ear Eng O I was quick to learn that rank, length of service and above all correctness of uniform were the least of reliable indicators of an individual's worth and commitment to the Service. On my first overseas detachment we had been working a particularly troublesome snag. I was wholly reliant on the Chf Tech and his team but as the Chf would later point out to me we were all following the lead of one JT who was the expert of the particular problem. A more scruffy and non military looking individual you would never come across, but he worked that aircraft from dawn to dusk determined that it was not getting the better of him. I followed the guys as they worked through the snag with the pressure of failure biting at their heals. Not once did they complain, not once did they doubt that they were getting that jet flying. Throughout the rest of my service I saw those guys again and again, different faces at different stations, all the same. I'd stand beside them before someone with shiny shoes and correctness of uniform and yes I'd count myself all the better for being in their company. First among equals all of them.:ok:

[smujsmith]

Tomjoad,

Thanks for that erudite accolade to the ground pounder who puts your jet in the air. I don't think my intention was to create any sense of denigration by our aircrew towards their ground support. I think that Beagle made a very valid point about not bringing the service in to disrepute whilst in uniform. I absolutely respect that attitude, and thinking of my service career, doubt I've ever broken that principle. It's a funny thing, but I've mended bent Alberts in Africa, Australia, Ankara and that's just the A's. if its bloody hot, and shorts and T shirt were comfortable then, as a SNCO I/C myself I felt that was OK. Only once, the one I mentioned previously, did I find this a problem. I suspect I was wrong in that I seem to have suggested that all VC10 captains had that particular persons attitude, I can tell you of some Herk drivers had a similar "attitude", if that's the correct phrase. Anyway, back on thread, I personally can't believe, based on all the statistics available, that there is not life elsewhere in the Universe. In fact, wouldn't it be fun if they turned up, the day after the MOD announced the closure of UFO watch.

[TomJoad]

Smujsmith no probs. Only relating my own experience. Bye the way I was not an Air Eng (don't know if I misled you) rather the other less useful type you know (the BEngO, JEngO )the signing of the leave passes and all that! But it was my honest experience from 1st line through the bays and latterly in the support offices. The overriding thing I learnt was take individual for what he is and don't make assumptions.


Back to Aliens. Absolutely when you look at the statistics of the number of stars planets etc then odds do appear to be in favour of the little green men. Why are they green by the way? But I always wonder having taken the time and effort to travel all those light years away why just flirt around surreptitiously and nick a tent and a dog. I mean Really!

[ExRAFRadar]

3 years at Spadeadam and I never saw an alien in Carlisle

Did pull a few monsters though.

[NutLoose]

3 years at Spadeadam and I never saw an alien in Carlisle

Did pull a few monsters though.


My sisters still live there :{

[ExRAFRadar]

Well as long as they did not frequent the 'Malt Shovel' or 'The Pagoda' around 84 - 87 they are not the ones I talk of. :)

[NutLoose]

I erm pulled the Barmaid in the Malt Shovel :ok:

Spadeadam. What did you do wrong?

[sitigeltfel]

I could imagine it's one of those jobs where you need a lot of patience. Reading through the link Coff provided, one crackpot would not take no for an answer and kept on bombarding the desk with emails and letters about some alleged sighting at Brentwaters, it amazed me how the desk remained professional and were not demeaning or patronising and did not tell him to $%&* off. Even if they have to cut and paste the same reply "thanks for your letter but we are not interested".

When we received a report there was a standard form for us to fill in based on answers to questions we put to the caller, we didn't allow them to ramble on for too long. After the last box had been ticked a polite thank you was given and an excuse was made to hang up, such as the necessity to get the info to higher authorities ASAP. The form was then passed to Comcen as a signal to send to the MOD.

I cannot think of one instance where we heard any more from the caller........... or the MOD!

[NutLoose]

Suprised the signal didn't roll out of the MOD printer and drop straight into the bin.

[Wensleydale]

why just flirt around surreptitiously and nick a tent and a dog


Perhaps they thought that it was a pup tent?:O

[gr4techie]

Teeteringhead wrote

Quote:
Simon Parkes, a Labour councillor in Whitby.
He features in the following programme

Confessions of an Alien Abductee - Channel 4

I've just watched this C4 documentary, in my opinion the doc isn't about alien abduction but speaks volumes about the psychology of the people who make these claims, some seriously need professional mental healthcare.

From the woman who claims she gets abducted every time she eats KFC and aliens keep on hiding her packet of fags when she leaves them laying around, to the councillor who is obsessed with drawing aliens and claims he has an alien mum, who provided him emotional support unlike his alcoholic mother and he regularly meets up with an alien shaped like a cat for sex. With this councillor, I think it explains the calibre of some of the politicians we have slipping through today.

Also the programme speaks volumes about the conn artists who prey on these deluded people.

[blaireau]

Some years ago, I was flying a B737 from Nanjing to Hong Kong.
Somewhere near Hangchou, both the F/O and myself saw numerous silver coloured spheres at constant size and constant bearing in the 1 o'clock high position. They remained there until obscured by some cloud. When clear of cloud, they were no longer there. We reported this sighting to ATC, but in those days of HF radio in airways, in Chinese airspace, this was a fruitless exercise. I subsequently reported the matter back in Hong Kong, but no-one gave it much credence. "Unknown" seems a reasonable summary of the experience .

[NutLoose]

both the F/O and myself saw numerous silver coloured spheres at constant size and constant bearing in the 1 o'clock high position


That sounds like a load of balls...



Sorry couldn't resist :oh:

[Lima Juliet]

Saw this going through the Lichfield Corridor at FL180 once - staying in perfect formation with our Tornado...

http://www.uwgb.edu/dutchs/GEOPHOTO/WEATHER/Anti-Sun0.JPG

...took us about 5 minutes to work out what it was. Basically, there was a layer of ice crystals reflecting the sun. It certainly made the hair on the back of neck stick up for a bit - it's funny what your eyes and brain will have you believe!

LJ

[Lima Juliet]

PS No anal probe for me that day! :ok:

[BEagle]

PS No anal probe for me that day!

Implying that such an event took place on other days....:eek:

[smujsmith]

Leon,

:ok: respect to you for,outing yourself, but are you sure,it was ice crystals ? I was born in Lichfield and can assure you that there's lots of funny stuff goes on up there :=

Smudge

[NutLoose]

I was born in Lichfield and can assure you that there's lots of funny stuff goes on up there

Smudge

Yup definitely anal probes

[gr4techie]

I saw this encounter on another forum and had to share...

"Well I was driving around Middlesbrough when suddenly I saw lights flying across my screen. I stopped the car and heard a voice telling me to walk towards the light.

It was the police. I somehow ended up in a red light area.

They didn't believe me that aliens had stolen my pants and put 2 prozzies in the boot..."

[Martin the Martian]

Just a thought, but for all those loons and muppets who see UFOs everywhere there is that very small, tiny percentage of unexplainable cases, sometimes involving radar traces and corresponding visual observations from aircrew, with unknown aircraft capable of outrunning and outflying the latest military technology.

Add to that the thought that if just one alien abduction case happens to be true, with a person being taken and abused by representatives of a foreign (alien) power, then with those beings' seeming contempt for mankind and the technology at their disposal, planet earth's natives could be in for a hell of a shock one day.

Or to put it another way, history has shown many times that when a civilization comes into contact with a more advanced power, they generally don't come out of it very well. Just ask the Aztecs or Native Americans or Aborigines.

As I said, just a thought.

[gr4techie]

MTM,

As a radar technician. Those radar trace can be accounted for by clutter, weather, interference or just the hardware playing up having a hissy fit. I'm sure there is many Tonka Navs out there who can vouch that radar can be temperamental.

The problem with peoples accounts is that people do not always report what is real. People are hoaxers, liars, hallucinating, mischievous, insane or just genuinely mistaken.

Anyways having had a flick through the National Archives stuff, the powers that be are just not interested and wont waste taxpayers money or resources on identification or invest, it's just not worth it when we have better thing to do. The powers that be are only interested in overflights by the Russian Airforce.

[Agaricus bisporus]

PS No anal probe for me that day!

Er, no, that's reserved for the UKIP councillor's cat.
(Underage Kittens Infatuation Party)

[Lima Juliet]

Just for the record - The only time I have had an actual half attempted violation was on a stag weekend about 15 years ago with 2 foreign ladies whom I met in the taxi queue. Back at their flat one tried to do something unsavoury with her digit and the rendezvous was terminated and immediate ex-fil was innitiated. Whilst she was an 'alien' in the foreign sense, she was certainly not interplanetary!

Of course , there was always the chance whilst sharing a room with a Jag mate in KAF, but the rohypnol meant that I had no recollection! :ok:

LJ

[NutLoose]

Leon, I have managed to find the CCTV images of the taxi queue to back up your story. :E


https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQsGOu_iR3Y-bZTrjT9V-SApi7BnDuTwHIfeFsJ5Rl9NZ_Sf8uz

[CoffmanStarter]

Leon ...

Must be a case of ...

"Per noctem volamus parati digiti" :E


Or words to that effect

Best ...

Coff.

[NutLoose]

Coff...... We shouldn't

http://www.greatbritishsweets.co.uk/ekmps/shops/atnight/images/cadburys-fudge-bar-x-10-1422-p.jpg

[Lima Juliet]

You guys crack me up...:}

[Haraka]

Hmm.
Better than "up your crack" I guess.....

[smujsmith]

Nutty,

"Just enough" :ok:

Smudge

[ExRAFRadar]

Nutty,
I had a very enjoyable 3.5 years at Spade, went straight there from West Drayton trade training. Only meant to be there for 2 weeks while space was made for me and my pal at the Sausage Factory that was Boulmer.
Three and half years later I was still there :)
So instead of being stuck in some pit watching scopes and taking Notes on PI's I saw all sorts of aircraft at very, very low level and firing Smokie Sams at them.
All that and the Malt Shovel on a Thursday night, which was the obligatory 'Grab a Grannie' night. ( I think) :)
Along with the Crescent and Botchergate at the weekends I was in heaven..