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Msunduzi
30th Apr 2013, 09:50
Q: How many internet mail list subscribers does it take to change a light bulb?

A: 1,331:

* 1 to change the light bulb and to post to the mail list that the light bulb has been changed

* 14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently.

* 7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs.

* 27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs.

* 53 to flame the spell checkers

* 156 to write to the list administrator complaining about the light bulb discussion and its inappropriateness to this mail list.

* 41 to correct spelling in the spelling/grammar flames.

* 109 to post that this list is not about light bulbs and to please take this email exchange to alt.lite.bulb

* 203 to demand that cross posting to alt.grammar, alt.spelling and alt.punctuation about changing light bulbs be stopped.

* 111 to defend the posting to this list saying that we are all use light bulbs and therefore the posts **are** relevant to this mail list.

* 306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique, and what brands are faulty.

* 27 to post URLs where one can see examples of different light bulbs

* 14 to post that the URLs were posted incorrectly, and to post corrected URLs.

* 3 to post about links they found from the URLs that are relevant to this list which makes light bulbs relevant to this list.

* 33 to concatenate all posts to date, then quote them including all headers and footers, and then add "Me Too."

* 12 to post to the list that they are unsubscribing because they cannot handle the light bulb controversey.

* 19 to quote the "Me Too's" to say, "Me Three."

* 4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ.

* 1 to propose new alt.change.lite.bulb newsgroup.

* 47 to say this is just what alt.physic.cold_fusion was meant for, leave it here.

* 143 votes for alt.lite.bulb.

Captain Dart
30th Apr 2013, 09:54
And then there's Godwin's Law, there must be a connection beyween Nazis and light bulbs.

Godwin's law - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godwin's_law)

redsnail
30th Apr 2013, 10:03
WRT PPRuNe and an accident,
Some one to post a METAR.
Someone to speculate the cause.
Someone to ask for everyone to wait for the official investigation.
Someone to twist it to blame Ryanair.

cattletruck
30th Apr 2013, 10:04
What they said.

Worrals in the wilds
30th Apr 2013, 10:07
WRT PPRuNe and an accident,
Some one to post a METAR.
Someone to speculate the cause.
Someone to ask for everyone to wait for the official investigation.
Someone to twist it to blame Ryanair.
And someone to post a massive conspiracy theory that makes the X Files look plausible. :E

mixture
30th Apr 2013, 10:34
WRT PPRuNe and an accident,
Some one to post a METAR.
Someone to speculate the cause.
Someone to ask for everyone to wait for the official investigation.
Someone to twist it to blame Ryanair.

and someone to find a way to reference in Slasher.

tony draper
30th Apr 2013, 10:43
One post to tell you where the light bulb was invented.:rolleyes:

onetrack
30th Apr 2013, 10:50
11 to query and denigrate a number of previous posters advice on light globe installation; questioning their light-globe installation qualifications; and demanding a CV of their light-globe-installing skills be posted.

Andy_S
30th Apr 2013, 10:50
WRT PPRuNe and an accident,
Some one to post a METAR.
Someone to speculate the cause.
Someone to ask for everyone to wait for the official investigation.
Someone to twist it to blame Ryanair.

And....

Someone to say "RIP, those poor souls"
Someone else to say that the RIP's can be taken as read, so let's get back to the discussion.
Someone to question the safety of Airbus / Boeing aircraft (delete as appropriate).
Someone to defend the safety record of Airbus / Boeing aircraft (delete as appropriate).
Someone to bemoan the lack of piloting skills in the industry today.
Someone to say they are a professional pilot, and to ask how many of the previous posters are aviation professionals as opposed to MS Flight Sim jockeys.

david1300
30th Apr 2013, 11:21
And 26 people to blame:
The pilot's schedule for fatigue
The airline's management for the pilot's fatigue
Another 31 people blaming:
P2F
LoCo Airlines
If an Australian incident - offshore maintenance

probes
30th Apr 2013, 11:29
someone demanding how many of the posters are actually professional lightbulbers and others to shut their trap.
someone to claim light bulbs are actually as dangerous as guns, or even more.

(P.S oh yeah, and someone to start "Light Bulb Alphabet", of course, and 'the last two shattered pieces start a new light bulb' ;), and someone to claim that's bulbsh1t)

The SSK
30th Apr 2013, 11:38
Usenet? What's usenet?

That joke needs to drag itself into the 21st century.

And yes, I do use usenet ... once in a blue moon

MagnusP
30th Apr 2013, 11:50
Someone to twist it to blame Ryanair.

Who were in an unholy conspiratory alliance with the French and Dubya.

green granite
30th Apr 2013, 12:11
I blame the Colonials myself.

Ancient Mariner
30th Apr 2013, 12:15
What's a lightbulb?
Per

Lonewolf_50
30th Apr 2013, 12:16
If only an expat had changed the lightbulb, the room wouldn't be dark.

Ripline
30th Apr 2013, 12:21
I changed a lightbulb once, but I think that I got away with it.......

Ripline

Ancient Mariner
30th Apr 2013, 12:23
Don't think so Mr. Wolf, when we expated here and there we always used a handyman for those tasks.
Per

(Exersising the use of "we" as wedding anniversary is only days away.:eek:)

radeng
30th Apr 2013, 12:34
Lord Edgware tried to fix the electric light.
It struck him dead - and served him right.
It is the duty of the wealthy man
To give employment to the artisan.

Lon More
30th Apr 2013, 12:40
Eventually someone will come along and blame Blair/Brown; quickly followed by me blaming MT

The SSK
30th Apr 2013, 12:46
I bet Mrs Thatcher could have changed a light bulb no problem, if it was a good old British bayonet. Not sure how she would have fared with a screw, though.

Erwin Schroedinger
30th Apr 2013, 13:09
You've completely ommitted to mention sexually obsessed contributors, who are surely essential participants in any thread worthy of spoilsport moderation.

Typically:

978 who favour sex with a lightbulb.

124 who favour sex with a light socket.

637 men who prefer being alone with their personal disharge tubes.

736 women who prefer being alone with their personal candles

52 electro-stimulation addicts who are turned on by a light switch.

16 pacemaker dependents who are turned on by a light switch.

6 who are too dim to enjoy light bulb sex no matter how much you try to turn them on.

3 who are completely in the dark when it comes to light bulb sex.

cockney steve
30th Apr 2013, 13:14
I blame the Colonials myself.

And FSL Draper will blame the Ffrench:p

Davaar
30th Apr 2013, 16:26
There is always, too, the Corollary to Godwin's Law:

Hitler was a carpet-chewing lunatic; that explains his ability to bring Germany back from the disaster of WW1; survive among a bunch of killer gangsters, many of whom fancied his job; reorganise the Reich into rather more than Karl der Grosse ever had; prove almost to the day what was forecast at Versailles by Churchill, Keynes and I think Lloyd George; almost hammer the British Empire, the USA and the Soviet Union combined into a pancake; and bid farewell to them all before they could catch him.

As someone said: "Some chicken! Some neck!

sisemen
30th Apr 2013, 17:02
Q: How many internet mail list subscribers does it take to change a light bulb?

A: 1,331:

* 1 to change the light bulb and to post to the mail list that the light bulb has been changed

* 14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently.

* 7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs.

* 27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs.

* 53 to flame the spell checkers

* 156 to write to the list administrator complaining about the light bulb discussion and its inappropriateness to this mail list.

* 41 to correct spelling in the spelling/grammar flames.

* 109 to post that this list is not about light bulbs and to please take this email exchange to alt.lite.bulb

* 203 to demand that cross posting to alt.grammar, alt.spelling and alt.punctuation about changing light bulbs be stopped.

* 111 to defend the posting to this list saying that we are all use light bulbs and therefore the posts **are** relevant to this mail list.

* 306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique, and what brands are faulty.

* 27 to post URLs where one can see examples of different light bulbs

* 14 to post that the URLs were posted incorrectly, and to post corrected URLs.

* 3 to post about links they found from the URLs that are relevant to this list which makes light bulbs relevant to this list.

* 33 to concatenate all posts to date, then quote them including all headers and footers, and then add "Me Too."

* 12 to post to the list that they are unsubscribing because they cannot handle the light bulb controversey.

* 19 to quote the "Me Too's" to say, "Me Three."

* 4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ.

* 1 to propose new alt.change.lite.bulb newsgroup.

* 47 to say this is just what alt.physic.cold_fusion was meant for, leave it here.

* 143 votes for alt.lite.bulb.

Ha ha - me too!

Lon More
30th Apr 2013, 18:22
Reddo's post #3 is unfortunately proven true again wrt the National 74 crash in Bagram

Dushan
30th Apr 2013, 18:46
Hasn't anyone mentioned that lightbulbs only work "by wire" and therefore are unreliable.

Sallyann1234
30th Apr 2013, 19:52
The very old lightbulb list needs updating now with a new last line...

* one to say that if the bulb had been an LED it wouldn't need changing.

G&T ice n slice
30th Apr 2013, 20:20
but the lightbulb must really WANT to change

tony draper
30th Apr 2013, 20:20
One of those occasions when you do think of exactly the right thing to say.
Walk round a corner into a side street to be confronted by about a dozen blokes in suits standing in a group blocking the path,they all turn and look at me so I say
"What is occurring here"
a suit answers with some authority
"We are from Gateshead Council" the "be on your way" is unspoken"
"Ah ok" I reply "which one of you has the lightbulb"
I pass through them in triumph.
:rolleyes:

Mr Chips
30th Apr 2013, 21:52
and yet, despite me asking repeatedly, nobody has convinced me yet that the light bulb had actually blown - all we have is the one persons word for it....
:E

Slasher
1st May 2013, 02:34
The original post -

I have an electric light bulb so large its as big as my wife's hooters.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

* 12 will immediately demand pics of said hooters

* 04 will want to see a pic of the light bulb

* 02 will ask the OP if the bulb still works

* 04 will state their abhorrence to large tits

* 08 will give examples of large light bulbs throughout history

* 05 will argue whether Thomas Edison invented the light bulb or not.

* 03 will quote Wiki on Edison

* 03 will get Germaine Greer into the thread

* 11 will post how they hate Germaine Greer

* 12 will remind the OP throughout thread he hasn't posted pics of his wife's hooters yet.

* 03 will object to the whole thread

* 07 will object to the objectors

* 10 will support objection to the objectors even though they object to the thread itself

* 02 will quote Shakespeare

* Someone will post a pic of big tits

* 01 will explain how Twiggy caused the temporary decline of big tit popularity in the late 60s

* 04 will try to get the thread back on track about light bulb sizes

* 02 will connect large light bulbs with nazism

* 03 will show examples of large searchlights used in London and Berlin 1940 - 1945

* 01 will compare large London searchlights with Diana Dors and Mae West

* 03 will mention how they liked Diana Dors

* 01 will say Diana Dors's real name was Diana Mary Fluck

* 05 will compare Mae West's large tits with WW2 life vests and why they were named after her

* 01 will produce a vandalised pic of a Mae West life vest with nipples drawn in it

* The OP will produce a pic of his lightbulb

* 02 will doubt the authenticity of the bulb and was somehow Adobe'd

* 04 will say their parents owned such a bulb in the 1950s

* 02 will ask the OP again if the bulb still works

* 04 will state categorically a 1953 light bulb cannot possibly work in 2013

* 02 will give the underlying physics as to why a 1953 bulb cannot work in 2013

* Someone will post a pic of big tits

* 01 will show pics of 1953 large light bulbs still working and qoute Wiki

* The OP will reply the bulb worked until 1993

* 02 will say that is utter tosh.

* 03 will produce Google pics of the 1953 light bulb in question and pics of similar sized tits

* 03 will state how gratifying it is the thread is back on track

* 04 will say it is demeaning to women to compare their breasts to light bulbs

* 01 will quote earlier posts about what Germaine Greer said about large tits

* 02 will say how the thread just goes around in circles

* 02 will say how interesting the thread was and that they learn something new in JB every day!

MagnusP
1st May 2013, 09:14
Splendid hexaboob there, Slasher. :ok:

Ancient Observer
1st May 2013, 11:26
G & T.

thank you for that. It caused the Best smile of the day (for me) so far.

Slasher
1st May 2013, 11:37
Here you are Milo - ;)


http://img2.etsystatic.com/000/0/5781050/il_fullxfull.237679438.jpg

The need support when they're dangling over a bench.

MagnusP
1st May 2013, 11:43
Slasher, without some reference, we're not sure of the cup size.

Milo Minderbinder
1st May 2013, 12:22
thats a heck of a screw fitting

they almost look handblown

tony draper
1st May 2013, 12:40
They look like Suez Canal lights or rather the bulbs for same.:uhoh:

Lon More
1st May 2013, 12:45
PAPIs Mr. D.



(to keep it on aviation.)


http://www.m0a.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/papi-300x198.gif

There's actually another set of lights which shine green. Probably because you're looking at them through the grass in the undershoot.

MagnusP
1st May 2013, 13:19
Thank you, Slasher. That clarifies matters. My preferences tend towards the FF, too.

El Grifo
1st May 2013, 14:26
Q. Why does it take 3 pre-menstrual women to change a lightbulb ??

A. Cos it just fckuing does right !!!

funfly
1st May 2013, 16:34
3 other and very regular posters...they may always be the same person;
1. corrects a spelling mistake
Then....
2. tells 3 that he is not a real pilot
3 then tells 2 that he is a prat
2 then replies that 3 has said something stupid
3 then replies that 2 is an idiot
2. tells 3 that he is not a real pilot
3 then tells 2 that he is a prat
2 then replies that 3 has said something stupid
3 then replies that 2 is an idiot
2. tells 3 that he is not a real pilot
3 then tells 2 that he is a prat
2 then replies that 3 has said something stupid
3 then replies that 2 is an idiot

ad infiprune..

funfly
1st May 2013, 16:40
Are Tony Draper and Slasher the same person?
How come every single subject gets input from Tony/Slasher?
Why does Tony Draper have an avatar when we can't get one?
Where do they get the time to do all this posting, are they using an autopost?
Where does Slasher get all his tit pictures, do we assume he spends all the rest of his time when not posting browsing the web for tit pictures?
Did you know that Lady Di had her navel pierced the day before she died?
So many questions, so few answers.

http://www.funfly.co.uk/images/truppence.png

El Grifo
1st May 2013, 16:54
3 other and very regular posters...they may always be the same person;
1. corrects a spelling mistake
Then....
2. tells 3 that he is not a real pilot
3 then tells 2 that he is a prat
2 then replies that 3 has said something stupid
3 then replies that 2 is an idiot
2. tells 3 that he is not a real pilot
3 then tells 2 that he is a prat
2 then replies that 3 has said something stupid
3 then replies that 2 is an idiot
2. tells 3 that he is not a real pilot
3 then tells 2 that he is a prat
2 then replies that 3 has said something stupid
3 then replies that 2 is an idiot



Then occasionally, someone randomly mentions chicken, or lettuce :}

Dushan
1st May 2013, 17:21
Or prosperity where there are no lightbulbs or electricity to power them...

ILS32
5th May 2013, 07:55
No one has yet mentioned having an epiphany and has seen the light.

Cacophonix
5th May 2013, 08:02
No one has yet mentioned having an epiphany and has seen the light.

That is very easily remedied... (damn that video gives me vertigo).

The The - I Saw The Light - YouTube

Caco

I.R.PIRATE
5th May 2013, 08:11
The thread is well lightened I see...

Cacophonix
5th May 2013, 09:45
I suppose all of this is just another good example of the way that forums work Slash. :ok:

Caco

Cacophonix
5th May 2013, 16:52
Not so on forums I frequent (apart from abusive and personally
threatening posts in threads). KAG just has a personal beef with Slasher and since he can't win a discussion has to run off to the mods. Poor form.


500N I steer well clear of personal vendettas here (save for the occasional laugh at some of our American co-posters who I hope know that I don't really know them and thus presume good intent and a sense of humour by all parties) and thus can't really know enough to like or dislike anybody.

I suspect that it would be a pleasure to sit down with 99.9% of the folks here and have a beer with them.

I keep my passion in check for the garbage that occurs in real life! :ok:

Caco

El Grifo
5th May 2013, 19:58
And to think it used to be fun around here :cool:

lomapaseo
5th May 2013, 20:23
It's not good form to gang up on a single poster who is operating within forum rules.

One shot over the bow is sufficient.

500N
5th May 2013, 20:31
Caco

"I steer well clear of personal vendettas here"

So do I. I didn't go into bat for the Slasher "boob" thread because of Slasher,
in fact I didn't know him or hadn't communicated with him before that (or KAG for that matter), I did it off my own belief in an individual who is not a mod censoring or trying to sensor a thread.

I also didn't know KAG had a beef with Slasher until afterwards when someone - NOT Slasher - sent me a PM just advising me.

loma
"It's not good form to gang up on a single poster who is
operating within forum rules."

Who's ganging up ?

I don't need a "clique" (I know some exist on here) to discuss, argue
or get my point across. If others post in agreement of what I have written
- such as in the Slasher "Boob" thread, then so be it.


In any case, I would expect anyone to be able to discuss, argue
or get a point across without having to resort to getting others (mods)
to delete things they don't agree with.

david1300
6th May 2013, 07:23
But . . . but . . . he found my grandad for me.:{

http://www.pprune.org/jet-blast/493292-things-you-couldnt-live-without-mum-never-had-3.html#post7368899

... until my mom died in my arms age 92...
Goodness, Rivets, you are older than I thought, but your mind is pretty clear for someone of 92+:)

That was a heartwarming read - your and Milo's posts.

jamesdevice
6th May 2013, 11:27
Slash and Milo have been put on the naughty step again. In Milo's case apparently a photo of a three-breasted woman wearing clothes is deemed pornographic and worthy of a ban. They were actually press release shots advertising the re-make of "Total Recall''. Interesting to see that whole threads are now disappearing

david1300
6th May 2013, 13:27
The playground sure ain't what it used to be:suspect::oh: