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View Full Version : Pick Up Liness !!!!


SmoothCriminal
27th Apr 2002, 02:07
"I wish you were a door, So I can bang you all day"

"I might not be the best looking guy in this bar, But I'm the only one talking to you " Errrrrrrrr....Groovy Baby

Get the idea,,,,,keep it going people:D :D

JetAgeHobo
27th Apr 2002, 14:55
Gal used this one on my a few years ago.

Looks at me, looks down at her crotch. Looks at me, looks down at her crotch again.

"Well honey, it ain't gonna eat itself"

djk
27th Apr 2002, 20:25
I must be totally oblivious when a girl tries to chat me up. I did have one try a while ago,

I forget what she said to me but she lost patience with me after a while and more or less screamed "I'M TRYING TO CHAT YOU UP FOR FECKS SAKE"!!!! :D

briteandbreezy
28th Apr 2002, 01:04
............................................................ ............................................................ .



Hmmmmmm,.... the one that made me blush the most was.......



Want to play army?..............

..I'll lay down and you can blow the hell outta me. :eek:



............................................................ ............................................................ .

ShyTorque
28th Apr 2002, 01:27
The old disco classic "You don't sweat much for a fat lass" always does the trick. Honest.

Or, point at her chest and say "Did you grow those yourself?" Never fails to provoke a reaction.

The rear flanking approach and sudden stealth nibble to the left buttock can be tricky at times though and should only be attempted if the husband or boyfriend is not within earshot. Take it from me, that is really true, especially if you are too drunk to run straight. Just don't ask me how I know....:rolleyes:

WX Man
28th Apr 2002, 17:43
If I told you you had a nice bod, would you hold it against me?

djk
28th Apr 2002, 17:45
"You don't sweat much for a fat lass" actually works? good grief :rolleyes:

Hew Jampton
28th Apr 2002, 19:16
"Get your coat, you're pulled"

"Here's 10p, phone your Mum and say you won't be home tonight"

"I've got a nine inch tongue and can breathe through my ears"

"So you're a lesbian, can I watch?"

djk
28th Apr 2002, 20:19
Those are almost as bad as "sit on my face and I'll guess your weight" :D

I Am Ugly
28th Apr 2002, 21:08
Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

Do you have a boyfriend?

"No."

Want one?

(If yes: Want another one?)

Fancy a fcuk?

Firestorm
29th Apr 2002, 11:42
Not so good at ones that work.... But you could always avoid these:

"Actually, I'm a pilot."

"Trust me: my Dad's a gynaecologist."

"Your breath smells: have you been eating garlic?"

"Enough about me: let's talk about flying."

"If I said yoiu had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?"


So, ladies, see you at the GatBash..........:cool:

Rich-Fine-Green
29th Apr 2002, 22:37
My Face is leaving in 15 minutes, I'd like you to be on it.

steamchicken
29th Apr 2002, 22:41
My view is that prepared chat-up lines never, ever work - just make you look like an Italian bank clerk

Sir Zero Mutt
29th Apr 2002, 22:42
Boy to Girl: "So, how would you like your eggs in the morning?"

Girl to Boy: "Unfertilized, thanks."

SZM.

gravanom
29th Apr 2002, 22:57
"Those shorts are so tight I can read your lips - yes I will take you home!"

Used by a mate in a Swansea nightclub. Did it work? No!

Willit Run
29th Apr 2002, 23:14
had a lady? come up to me in the bar not too long ago and ask if I was circumsised?, I said" why would you want to know that?" she said" I just want to know what to expect".

Nuff said!

Flash2001
30th Apr 2002, 02:29
This one attributed to the late David Koresh of Waco fame:

"God has chosen you to receive my seed"

Wino
30th Apr 2002, 03:11
First night in Kells Nightclub (used to be at the 4 seasons, now called the Swallow at Manchester, night club since closed) and not used to British Slang, and some girl asked me to "help get her kit off" I had no idea what she was talkin about... Too subtle for this American I guess :D


Overheard when I was tending bar in College, "I want to f*ck you till you sweat cum." This guy used the line alot and he got hit about once a night. I asked him what he was doing and he said "Look, when you step up to the plate every so often you are gonna get hit by a pitch, but it works about 1 out of 3 times and when we leave there is no doubt what is gonna happen, and a .333 average is a career in any league!" (thats a baseball reference to batting averages for all you british...)

Cheers
Wino

Check 6
4th May 2002, 12:19
I've been thinking a lot about you lately.

This time its the "real thing."

I love you no $hit.

I'll respect you in the morning.

:D :D :D