View Full Version : You know you're getting old when:

Celtic Emerald
26th Apr 2002, 16:20
Alright sob sob the final prove came today after ignoring for a while the slightly, greying hair and the creak in my knees when I hillwalk when I was taking the bus two stops from the pub which serves the best pub grub in Dublin (& aptly named 'The Morgue' cause the tramlines used to end there & when people used to get knocked down by the trams they'd bring the dead bodies into the pub at the turn of the century) to work cause I was too bloody lazy to walk (another sign I fear). A teenager taking pity on me stood up & offered me her seat meaning it kindly of course. Although I smiled back & politely explained & refused secretly I grimaced inside & realised that although I still inside regard meself as a young one, the younger generation DONT. Sob sob, life will never be the same again sob. :(

What's brought you guys to the realisation you'se are getting on a bit & can anyone offer me words of comfort?


26th Apr 2002, 16:39
Em, 2 episodes stand out in my mind.
The first time a young shop assistant called me Ma'am and used the polite form of adress instead of the familiar "you". :eek:
Don't think I looked in a mirror for a whole week. ;)

Another was the first time I was older than the Captain of our 747 crew.
I drank way too much that night in an attempt to forget the sorry facts.
Next day I looked as old as I felt, and it wasn't a pretty sight! :D

The ravages of time and gravity play foul tricks on us women. Before our own eyes we change from beddable young things into ancient crones feared by man and child alike.

There is no comfort, none at all.
Exept perhaps in the realization that getting old is better than dying young.
Carpe Diem mate!

26th Apr 2002, 16:43
Well you are only as old as you think. I have known sixty year old teenagers and teenagers that have wished themselves into their forties. Personally I do mad and capricious, tonight off Scottish dancing. As an ex ATCO now retired at 60, I decided to run a company, as I said I do mad!! Well most people tell me that I need my head seeing to. Just enjoy life, whether it is hobbies, careers or anything else. Good luck to you and have a Guinness for me - it don't taste the same outside Dublin.;)

26th Apr 2002, 16:45
I have sold my soul ( and that of draper - for an additional thirty quid) to the devil.
we shall live forever!:p

26th Apr 2002, 16:56
Also, Flaps, hoe gaat het met jou? :D

26th Apr 2002, 16:58
:D I am really looking forward to getting old so as to avoid all the unwanted attentions of the opposite sex :p :D :p
I think I'll notice when it happens, have bought a dog in anticipation to help me pass all the regained time.

Seriously, I started thinking about it when I realised that on layovers I was going out for dinner mostly with CSDs, Pursers and Captains because I found their conversation more interesting as we often share the same interests (ouch! that one says it all!) and because I prefer to eat in a real restaurant rather that in a Pizza Hut. But I am still at that stage where you prefer to think that you are very mature for a young girl :D

26th Apr 2002, 18:02
Im totally depressed now.

Youre right falps, when you drink too much the night before, it sure shows the next day!!

and I no longer go out without my make up like I did when I was a bright young thing, because I look like nothing on earth!!!!!!!

:D Can still pull scouse systems analysts in clubs and get a snog, tho!!:D :p :p

26th Apr 2002, 18:09
There is no such thing as getting old!!!! Maybe other people may think you're looking a bit the worse for wear, but YOU KNOW that deep inside --- nothing has changed!!!

Attitude is all and with the right attitude you will die at the age of 27 - even if you were born in 1871.

Also look at my age-old sign off below -- ;) :D :)

26th Apr 2002, 18:11
ALSO ---- how come I've only got 61 posts ????????????

26th Apr 2002, 18:31
61 posts in dog years whools = 4,398 in human posts.:p

26th Apr 2002, 18:40
Auntie Em, Auntie Em!... ;) Ha! couldn't resist.

I've enjoyed turning 50 ... I'm getting discounts now. :)

tony draper
26th Apr 2002, 19:04
Ah !, but one undoubtedly benifits from increased wisdom, one looks around at the fumbling young fools and smiles, could one have possibly been that dumb onself once, Nah nobody could be a dumb as present young generation . :rolleyes:

bubba zanetti
26th Apr 2002, 19:11
Whilst out with my 6 year old the other day, the store clerk remarked how nice for her to be out with her grandpa !!!

... oh woe is me !!!
In my mind a ladykiller .... in reality .... someone's grandpa!!?

OMG !!! time for surgery .... it has come to this !!!

28th Apr 2002, 17:03
I realised this afternoon that something was up when after enjoying a truly lovely mornings flight on a gorgeous day, smooth uneventful slot into Zurich, managed a wave at the spotters just before touchdown, no last minute hassels got to the hotel and walked in to see a mass of pulchritude in their light dun coloured uniforms and red hats. Ignored them and marched to check in to get my room when my fellow operative remarked that I had not so much as glanced in their direction. It's a terrible thing when a pilot ceases to look up when a plane flies overhead I thought, so what was happening to me???
Had the thought of the cold beer waiting so completely occupied my mind, OR WAS I GETTING OLD#####?????
A few beer later, the opo's unconcious in his pit summoning up strength for the evening bash and I am catching up on whazzzup in JB, and I am begining to wonder myself. Is this the beginning of the end. Have I lost that vital curiosity that has played so large a part of my life. I shake my head in wonder, I didn't even glance, it's a worry I tell you.

Tartan Gannet
28th Apr 2002, 17:34
Next year I will be eligible to take a SAGA Holiday along with my Octogenarian father, if we are both spared and well.

Age doesnt bother me. I am what I am.

Good luck.


tony draper
28th Apr 2002, 17:49
I worry that the items I see on the Antiques Roadshow is stuff I got for xmas once..:(

28th Apr 2002, 18:19
Loosing or thinning hair from were it should be AND gaining mutant growing hairs in the strangest of places.

29th Apr 2002, 00:49
You line everything up to pee straight down into the bowl, and instead it angles off about 45 degrees and hits the bog roll hanging on the vanity.:eek:

Jet Dragon
29th Apr 2002, 00:57
You can't be bothered to respond to a "Sex on JB" poll



29th Apr 2002, 08:46
Three guys aged 60, 70 & 80 lamenting the passing of the years.
Says the 60 year old:" You have to get up three times a night to have a pee and you stand there waiting for it to happen. It's terrible to be sixty!"

That's nothing, wait till you are 70, says the 70 year old. "You sit on the bog, sometimes takes three days before you can have a [email protected], it's awful!"

Wait until you are 80, says the 80 year old.

Immediately the 60 year old says; you are having trouble having a p!ss, right?

No, I p!ss like a horse on a flat rock, every morning at 6 o'clock.

You are having trouble having a [email protected] aren't you, says the 70 year old.

No not at all, I have an enormous [email protected] every morning at 6:30.

Well, what are you complaining about then?

"I don't wake up till 7!" :mad: :D :D

tony draper
29th Apr 2002, 08:49
Hee hee.good un Hot dog, :rolleyes:

Capt Vegemite
29th Apr 2002, 11:51
The missus ask me to sit down to pee.
She sick of me peein in two streams,one goin on the toilet roll an the other on the toothbrush holder:(

29th Apr 2002, 12:57
There are one or two benefits of getting older:

My car insurance is cheaper.

I'm over the angst of the first grey hair

My mother no longer says "You're not going out dressed like THAT?"

I can afford cashmere knitwear

I rather like playing the Mrs Robinson role


Surly Bondslipper
29th Apr 2002, 13:34
One sign of getting old is when you bend down to tie your laces, and wonder if there is anything else you could be doing while you're down there....:)

Celtic Emerald
29th Apr 2002, 18:26
It gets worse! :( My friends little girl asked quite innocently the other day why my hair was changing a different colour. She's a blonde so I got my revenge on the child by retorting "Well you're hair is that colour already". My I can be nasty hee hee. :D

The one consolation I have is knowing that Slasher beat me to the big 40 by a few months which IMHO makes him an oul fella & me a young goseen. Sorry Slash OLD mate, ya can't win them all :p


tony draper
29th Apr 2002, 19:01
Wouldn't mind wakin up ter find that archeologist lady Cadenza thingy crouchin over me with a trowel in one hand and me in the other. :p

29th Apr 2002, 19:50
You know your gettin old when:

* You post the same sh!t on JB that everyone else has posted alreadey because you cant be stuffed readin through the 6-page thread first

* D & G and Wannabee insults to you have a "Sir" added on the end of them

* Someone makes a funney crack about S-DRAM or DSL connections in Internet Issues and you reply with a "LOL @ suchandsuch!" even though you dont know jack about what the hell hes joking about

* You start to talk more and more authoritativley about history like Drapes!

* You praise the excelent and informative reply of a PPRuNer in Tech Log and even send him a congratulatory email, whilst forgetting you kicked the absolute living sh!t out of him in D & G just last week

* In Chat you get your private-chat windows mixed up and end up asking Danny how big his tits are

* You swear and press the "More Help" button a dozen times on the dial-up conector till you realise your bloodey house-mate borrowed the phone line cable an hour ago


30th Apr 2002, 12:22
1. You and your teeth don't sleep together.

2. Your try to straighten out the wrinkles in your socks and discover you aren't wearing any.

3. At the breakfast table you hear snap, crackle, pop and you're not eating cereal.

4. Your back goes out but you stay home.

5. When you wake up looking like your passport picture.

6. It takes two tries to get up from the couch.

7. When your idea of a night out is sitting on the patio.

8. When happy hour is a nap.

9. When you're on vacation and your energy runs out before your money does..

10. When you say something to your kids that your mother said to you and you always hated it.

11. When all you want for your birthday is to not be reminded of your age.

12. When you step off a curb and look down one more time to make sure the street is still there.

13. Your idea of weight lifting is standing up.

14. It takes longer to rest than it did to get tired.

15. Your memory is shorter and your complaining lasts longer.

16. Your address book has mostly names that start with Dr.

17. You sit in a rocking chair and can't get it going.

18. The pharmacist has become your new best friend.

19. Getting "lucky" means you found your car in the parking lot.

20. The twinkle in your eye is merely a reflection from the sun on our bifocals.

21. It takes twice as long...to look half as good.

22. Everything hurts, and what doesn't hurt doesn't work.

23. You look for your glasses for half an hour and they were on your head the whole time.

24. You sink your teeth into a steak - and they stay there.

25. You give up all your bad habits and still don't feel good.

26. You have more patience, but it is actually that you just don't care anymore.

27. You finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart.

28. You wonder how you could be over the hill when you don't even remember being on top of it.

If you can't relate to any of the above.......

..YA NOT OLD!!!!!!! ;) :D :p


30th Apr 2002, 13:48
Walking out of arrivals at Kota Kinabalu I'm accosted by the SAGA Rep. When I tell her I'm not with SAGA she shouts in my ear, "This way Sir! We sort it out for you !" forces me into their bus and kidnaps me. Luckily they were going to the same place but not, thank God in the Golden Circle Wing. (Well it saves you ten Ringgit for the taxi fare doesn't it?)

Got my own back later when the Iban Warrior from the tourist board did his customary appearance round the beach garden at sunset. I slipped him a couple of Ringgit to threaten her with his Sumpit and force her onto the dance floor for the traditional war dance, much to the delight of the old dears in her mob of Grannies.

I mean, do I look like I'm over fifty? (Don't anyone answer that!!! It was the Talisker that done it...)

What the hell are SAGA doing in the wilds of Borneo anyway? They'll be dragging the old dears up Everest next!

[P.S. Sumpit = native blowpipe with a spear point on it. These ex-headhunter guys really know how to look genuinely mad. Its all to do with something they drink that makes them genuinely mad. That and the tatoos]

Through difficulties to the cinema

30th Apr 2002, 19:48
Finding that first grey PUBIC hair is a big shock.

Who me? TWANG!! No, didn't hurt a bit...:D

Celtic Emerald
1st May 2002, 17:12
I dare say that because of the fact that 'Fantom'

We won't be allowed to have a bit of crumpet on the flightdeck anymore has aged the poor man ten years ;)

Sorry Fantom old mate! I won't quote you on the rest you said, I'd rather you lived to be an old man & get to enjoy your much longed for retirement LOL