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Yellow & Blue Baron
2nd Sep 2011, 18:31
With the Christmas holidays fast approaching you might be wondering about child management, especially when the younger ones belonging to friends and relatives come visiting.

You may want to buy yourself a Christmas gift this year .. a Sea Eagle (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/earth/wildlife/8738064/Sea-eagles-could-target-children.html)

;)

radeng
2nd Sep 2011, 18:44
I follow the instructions on some the tablet packets I get - 'keep out of the sight and reach of children'.

Lon More
2nd Sep 2011, 19:03
I hoped to see a naval F15 when I opened the link :*

Um... lifting...
2nd Sep 2011, 19:47
One prefers turkey. Some prefer goose, yet others prefer ham.

Children are preferred by few, but to manage them, it's really no different. Reasonable portion sizes and estimate the appetites of guests.

treadigraph
2nd Sep 2011, 20:39
Thought it was a film starring Steven Sea Eagle. Apparently he ernes quite a lot...

vulcanised
2nd Sep 2011, 20:58
For children in Holland it's a bit different..............

UCUHTDrca4s

parabellum
2nd Sep 2011, 23:41
We will have about seventeen for Christmas dinner this year. Children's ages range from sixteen down to two. By tradition the children have a separate table and the older ones look after the younger ones, with the very occasional helping hand from a parent.

A rare opportunity for parents to be able to sit down and enjoy a Christmas Dinner in adult company, without constant diversions for children. Different story if you are at home with just your own kids, unless you have a lot of them!

Yellow & Blue Baron
3rd Sep 2011, 05:08
Lon More, for you (http://oyun.pozitifpc.com/imaj/f-15-strike-eagle-22.jpg)! Although, I think this might be a slightly stronger than necessary response to controlling children over the break! :E

Lon More
3rd Sep 2011, 09:10
Thanks Baron, just what was needed. You haven't got any spare contraceptives for Parabellum have you? :E

Vulcanised, that about sums it up.

Flap 5
3rd Sep 2011, 09:59
I thought this was the Sea Eagle referred to:

Sea Eagle (ASM) - 'Anti-Ship' Missile (http://www.blackburn-buccaneer.co.uk/Pages1_files/SeaEagle_Index.html)

Have our friends over the Pond nicked that too?

I agree though. A bit harsh on children.

givemewings
3rd Sep 2011, 10:01
Here's how it used to work havign Christmas at my elder sister's place...

Presents were foregone for all but the smallest kids (the ones that still love the whoel Santa thing)

Money that would otherwise have been spent on gifts goes into a kitty. On Christmas Day, the usual rowdy lunch and games for kids is held, adults supervise. So the children get the whole Christmas shebang, without mum & dad being a bit tipsy and not paying attention to them.

On boxing day, the money in the kitty is used to buy a babysitter (or three) who then take the kids off on some excursion (movies, bowling, ice skating what have you) while the remainder is spent on booze & food for the adults to enjoy in a child-free environment for about 4 or 5 hours while the kids are out. One of the parents will then have all the kids back to their place down the road for a sleepover (with babysitters) so parents can enjoy the evening as well.

Everyone wins!!! :ok:

corsair
3rd Sep 2011, 12:44
Isn't it a bit early to be thinking of Christmas? Apart from that the Sea Eagle story is ridiculous, as if that would happen! No what you really need are Wolves. Repopulate the countryside with wolves. Then leave your small children outside at night so the wolves can either eat them or take them away and raise them as their own. A far more practical solution.

As for Christmas, with two small kids I can hardly avoid them until the wolf situation has been organised. So I'm stuck with them. Last year I went to my sister's house in the hills for my first ever white Christmas. So much for global warming. There were plenty of kids there but the house is big enough to get away from them. Perfect.

The most charming aspect of last Christmas was the fact that we spent Christmas eve at my Mother's house. Seeing my sons going to bed excitedly anticipating Santa in my old room was quite moving.

Nevertheless I look forward to the wolf situation being organised.

radeng
3rd Sep 2011, 13:43
Corsair,

Do we REALLY want another Rome?

RJM
3rd Sep 2011, 17:13
...she brings this up every year and I've been thinking about it but what with the expense and the disruption to the lifestyle etc I think we'll just stick with the Pill.

corsair
3rd Sep 2011, 17:23
Do we REALLY want another Rome? Well that did occur to me. I like to think that was a one off. But the Roman empire thing worked well for hundreds of years. Plus they had their own unique way of dealing with unwanted children.

I took my two to the woods today but they failed to get lost and soon tracked me down. It would be quite different if there were wolves in the woods. Yes, wolves are the answer. Or bears, bears too.

Yellow & Blue Baron
3rd Sep 2011, 21:14
Corsair - your replies are very funny! :ok:

parabellum
4th Sep 2011, 00:53
The idea of moving the kids a few feet away from the adults is that kids really don't care about the Christmas food half as much as adults do, in fact for kids Christmas is all about presents!

The present thing is an everybody in occasion, watchng kids unwrap their presents can be a priceless experience, especially when a sreaming, tearful toddler throws a very expensive present half across the room because it isn't what they wanted or it is blue and not red!

Don't need the condoms thanks Lon, my one and only offspring, (that I am aware of), will be fifty next birthday!:)