View Full Version : Misheard Names

26th Jul 2011, 21:08
Seems to be a name fetish going on JB at the moment, so here's another angle.

Some years ago I heard someone refer to a pub a few miles away called the Kinky Newt.

Driving in that area one day I went looking for it - found the King Canute!

26th Jul 2011, 21:28
I returned to my office one day to find a handwritten message on my desk :

"Please call Mr. Pin."

I didn't know a Mr. Pin (in fact I didn't know anyone Chinese), so I found the person who'd taken the message and asked him for further information. He told me that it was definitely Mr. Pin but sounded like a woman. It was Miss Turpin.

26th Jul 2011, 22:22
"Excuse me while I kiss this guy" - Jimi Hendrix

26th Jul 2011, 22:35
Spent some time driving around Hemel Hemstead a few years ago looking for Barnacles Road. Stoppedand asked several people until one suggested that it might be Barnacres Road I was looking for.
It was!

26th Jul 2011, 23:14
A pub in Sidcup - the Charcoal Burner. Always referred to as the 'Ars***e Burner'.

27th Jul 2011, 02:10
The "Eagle & Child" pub near Finningley managed to morph into the "Duck & F*ck", somehow .....

27th Jul 2011, 05:30
Radio station advertises "streaming media." I mis-heard it as "screaming media" and now that's stuck.

27th Jul 2011, 06:00
My Blowing Feet.

Not many will get this.

27th Jul 2011, 07:21
For years I thought it was Urethra Franklin.

27th Jul 2011, 07:29
BBC presenter Louise Minchin "Munchkin."

27th Jul 2011, 07:46
Chinese news readers usually call Hillary "Misses Clit On" which
creates a bit of confusion for locals who speak some English.

Adam Nams
27th Jul 2011, 07:47
The "Eagle & Child" pub near Finningley ...

It was "The Bird and [email protected]" when I was there.

27th Jul 2011, 08:50
‪Maxell - Cassettes - Me Ears Are Alight - UK Advert‬‏ - YouTube


27th Jul 2011, 10:36
These are called 'Mondegreens' from the poem

They have slain the Earl of Moray
And laid him on the green

which was supposedly misheard as and Lady Mondegreen.

One famous one is that well-known hymn about Gladly the cross-eyed bear.

27th Jul 2011, 10:45


27th Jul 2011, 12:24
Creedence Clearwater Revival had a hit called 'Bad Moon on the Rise'.

I was quite young and heard the sung lyric as:

'.... there's a bathroom on the right'!

27th Jul 2011, 12:25
Actually, it was 'bad moon rising', so a double bubble for you there.

27th Jul 2011, 12:44
"Actually, it was 'bad moon rising', so a double bubble for you there."

You are correct but the last line of the 2nd verse is;

"There's a bad moon on the rise"

27th Jul 2011, 12:57
Robert Palmer's hit had a line that sounds suspiciously like
" you might as well face it, you're a d*ck with a glove".

John Williamson's Papa Whiskey November:
"she was in love with the pilot; he was in love with this guy"..

27th Jul 2011, 13:24
My Blowing Feet.

Not many will get this.
I've just been reading the Disgusting Issues...

27th Jul 2011, 16:28
once got asked the way to the Stailway Ration :rolleyes:

27th Jul 2011, 16:46
The Bright Star at Peters Green, near Luton Airport was known by us as the Tight Bra.

27th Jul 2011, 17:00
I think that I shall never see
Light from the dawnser, shining lee

We had to sing that Dawnser song quite frequently as kids, but no matter how we looked, we could never get a glimpse of anything that looked like lee light.

Should we looked for a boat? Surely the lee light would illuminate the lee helm? :confused:

The above post is made with apologies to Beverly Cleary.

27th Jul 2011, 19:28
My late father in law used to think the local radio DJ was a bit odd because he kept saying "dull day" even when the sun was shining brightly. he later discovered he was saying "dial Dave"......

Lon More
7th Nov 2013, 09:15
This morning had "The Days of Pearly Suspenders" running through my mind .

David McWilliams - Days of Pearly Spencer - YouTube

7th Nov 2013, 09:28
I once worked with a poor sod called Michael Hunt, and a Richard Sole who used to sign his name 'R. Sole' so we had clients phoning asking for 'R Sole'.

Lon More
7th Nov 2013, 09:48
Back in the 1860s there was an ATCO at London who shared the name.
One of the Assistants, a mini-skirted dolly bird from Liverpool stood halfway up the stairs and called "Has anybody seen Moik 'Unt?" A voice from somewhere below answered, " Just bend over a couple of inches ...."

7th Nov 2013, 10:55
1860's ! I didn't think you were that old Lon :p

7th Nov 2013, 11:34
We used to get "Hugh G. Rection" paged over the tannoy by the Germans in Darmstadt.

7th Nov 2013, 12:11
I used to work in a company where the MD's name surname was Locke and the Logisitics Director was Rock. It was hard to keep a straight face when we had a delegation of Chinese visit.

I know that 99% have heard it before but if you are having a really bad day just listen to Morons at Heathrow.

7th Nov 2013, 13:22
When I was in the "Mixed Infants" we had a concert. I told my mother I was singing in "Old Don McBray." My parents came to the concert and couldn't find the song on the programme. I sang my heart out oblivious to the fact that I should have been singing "Alderman Grey" :uhoh:

Dak Man
7th Nov 2013, 13:26
Used to go a a pub / club in the 80's / 90's called "The Athletic" it was always referred to as "The Steve Cram". The LLanover Arms was always "The Land R0ver"

7th Nov 2013, 13:39
1860's ! I didn't think you were that old Lon http://images.ibsrv.net/ibsrv/res/src:www.pprune.org/get/images/smilies/tongue.gif

Didn't know they had ATCOs back then either. HABCOs (Hot Air Balloon Controllers?)

7th Nov 2013, 14:07
Watching Ultimate Airport Dubai last night and they needed to off load 50 tonnes of fuel from an A330. I was sure the maintenance supervisor said he was waiting for the fuel w&nker. He actually said fuel worker but he had a heavy Indian accent. Certainly woke me up!

7th Nov 2013, 14:33
I understand the following is a lusty rendition of Australias national anthem, sung by a number of schoolchildren ...

Australians all own ostriches
Four minus one is three.
With olden royals, we're fair and loyal,
Our home is dirt by sea.
I learned to bounce on nature strips
In booties stitched with care.
In mystery's haze, let's harvest maize
And plant azaleas there.
Enjoy full trains and let us in
And dance Australia, yeah!

Of course, the original goes ...

Australians all, let us rejoice,
For we are young and free
We've golden soil and wealth for toil,
Our home is girt by sea
Our land abounds in Nature's gifts
Of beauty rich and rare
In history's page, let every stage
Advance Australia fair!
In joyful strains then let us sing,
'Advance Australia fair!'