Happy Hour in the Falklands

[Yarpy]

Defence review: These cuts leave us vulnerable to our enemies around the world - Telegraph (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/comment/columnists/concoughlin/8079008/Defence-review-These-cuts-leave-us-vulnerable-to-our-enemies-around-the-world.html)

I'm reliably informed by soldiers who have recently served in the South Atlantic that, if the Argentines chose to attack late on a Friday night, they would find the islands relatively undefended, as that is when the fighter pilots like to let their hair down in the bar of the Upland Goose Hotel.

Oh dear . . .

[Wensleydale]

I remember CBFFI calling a no-notice exercise at 2200 one evening in the mid-eighties. I am not sure of the state of the fighter pilots, but some punchy calls were made in the COC at RAF Stanley!!

[Evalu8ter]

It won't be the "Upland" Goose they'll be in - many happy memories of the real Goose though. Typical army plonker who's quoted - the Q crews will not be in there, they'll be at work. Perhaps he'd like to comment how many of the troops are bladdered/fighting at the RIC bar?

[NUFC1892]

Perhaps he'd like to comment how many of the troops are bladdered/fighting at the RIC bar?

Short answer = all of them.:yuk::ouch::yuk::ouch::yuk::ouch::yuk::ouch:

Never having to clear and lock that bar again has added years to my life expectancy.:)

[JTIDS]

Added years?!!?

Lucky you!

[Wyler]

The sheer amount of boozing on a Thu and Fri night was indeed eye watering. However, there were plenty of people at work doing their jobs.

As for the Infantry, a bloody disgrace. Apart from the Ghurkas they were a bunch of animals. The rest of us may have been in the bar drinking but at least we were not lurking in 38 facility jumping on people and beating them senseless. That's when they were'nt tearing lumps out of each other. Some of their SNCOs were just as bad and their officers, with one or two exceptions, were 'nice but dim' types.

Happy days!!

[Willard Whyte]

'Our' ric was kept out mischeif by using 'em to clear the ice off our runway.

On the way down their TriStar had to divert, to Montevideo, I think. Night in hotel resulted in some all too predictable mayhem. A few nights after arrival some squaddies barricaded themselves inside one of the eleventy-twelve thousand bars on base. After 3 substantial fines for the ringleaders, and a weeks ice-scraping duties, they seemed well behaved. Their CO was a bit of an @rse though, particularly at one of the boozy quiz nights.

Happy days.

[Laarbruch72]

fighter pilots like to let their hair down in the bar of the Upland Goose Hotel.


I hope not because it's now a row of refurbished houses, some of it belonging to the Antarctic Survey. Has been for a long time. So a load of scientists would probably be nonplussed at finding a pissed up airman in their lounge.
IF anyone of the officer class is down town it's more likely to be the Malivina House Hotel. Very nice it is too.

I agree with Wyler that the behaviour of some of the infantry down there was truly shocking. On my last visit just months ago, an Army Staff Sergeant was jailed for attempting to bite one of his colleague's cheeks off his face. Animals is the only word for some of them.
I don't think the issue of RAF people having a quiet pint when they're not on Q is the big problem down there.

Oh, and just saw this gem:

the RAF has a squadron of just four Typhoon interceptors (at MPA)

4 aircraft now make a squadron? I hope 1435 know this. Where's that thread about squadron numbers again? :8

[Jumping_Jack]

I was down there for just over a year so saw 3 different Regiments (Paras, Cheshires and the Gurkhas) and can concur with the comments about the RIC. The Cheshires were easily the worst however the Gurkhas were brilliant (and we had plenty of excellent curry too!!).

J_J

[Easy Street]

I've just finished reading "The Junior Officers' Reading Club" and his parting shot about lazy RAF staff and boozing at MPA was quite stinging. Therefore it's interesting to hear that the Army are perhaps not quite as virtuous as the author made out!

[engineer(retard)]

Thumbs up for the ghurkas and found the Anglians to be a good bunch of lads as well. Now the Irish Rangers :mad:

[MATELO]

In the late 90's, the RIC at the time caused mayhem in their first 2 nights. The RSM ordered everybody out of the buildings and into tents for 3 days. Apparently, after that, they were as good as gold for the next 6 months.

[Airborne Aircrew]

Pretty much the same was said about Russia attacking on any given Friday night...

[4mastacker]

NUFC1892 wrote: ...........
Never having to clear and lock that bar again has added years to my life expectancy.http://images.ibsrv.net/ibsrv/res/src:www.pprune.org/get/images/smilies/smile.gif Today 07:52The easiest way to lock the Gull & Flick Knife was to get one of the RIC guards to do it. I was lucky and had the Woofers regimental boxing champion on my guard and he cleared the place in five minutes flat. I just stood back and watched.

That night was brightened by a senior RAF occifer who turned up at the 38 Facility guardroom, dressed in wet-suit and flippers looking for the Sub-Aqua Club (so he said) although it was rather late in the evening(after closing time) for him to be doing so. One of the Woofers did ask, in all innocence, if that was a flying suit he was wearing.

[XV490]

Is the Upland Goose still going in Stanley? Nice fish and chips to accompany the (canned) Guinness, IIRC. God knows what type of marine life the fish was, though.
And MPA at night? Like Alcatraz with all the cell doors open. :eek:

[Craven Moorhed]

Most Friday Nite HH's started on the infamous 1435 Flt Maltese Cross Rug.
Only fighter mates and 'nice' chicks were allowed to stand on it.....
(nice = any chick, after having been there > 3 weeks)

One cold/snowy Friday night, the senior service played a blinder and nicked it.
We, on 1435, got an e-mail several days later with a photo of said rug on the flight deck of HMS ?????? on it's way home crossing the equator !! :ok:

Then it was back to the Goose. Less said about that the better.....

[Lima Juliet]

Crikey, I'd forgotten about "the carpet" - I had some of my funniest nights on that around MPA's differing haunts - the "pole" was also one of my favourites :E

LJ

[Craven Moorhed]

You & I got lashed up on that carpet Leon, July 1999 IIRC.

You were busy shouting to keep the blunties and Ruprechts off....
I keep playing Supersonic by Oasis....

Remember ? No ? Me neither ! :confused:

[Lima Juliet]

Ah ha! Grey matter now stimulated into remembering.

Wotcher mate!

[iRaven]

Best "pole" story was when CBFFI was being brought into the Goose by OC 1435. Two young ladies are twirling around the afore mentioned when CBFFI exclaims "good god, where did you get these 2 trollops from?". To which the OC replied "Sandhurst, Sir".

They were 2 Sandhurst Cadets!

:E:E

[handleturning]

Remember when the carpet was first invented (showing my age). OC Admin had charged us for a carpet replacement following a bit of flaming sambouca action. They replaced so little carpet that there was a massive off-cut left, which we nicked on the basis that if we were drinking on our carpet we could do what we wanted on it.

And boy did we :E

[Spit the Dog]

On my stint last year it was the resident Rapier bunch of school kids that were by far worse than the Royal Irish and 3 Para put together. Its promoting 23 yr old Cpls to acting Sgt and putting them in a mess where they have no idea about ethos and core values. They also had a WO2 sent home !

[SilsoeSid]

Aaah, memories of Murray Heights of a Friday night :D

http://i52.photobucket.com/albums/g11/silsoesid/lancesleap.jpg

http://i52.photobucket.com/albums/g11/silsoesid/murrayhts.jpg

The good thing about being duty driver back then was that it meant every other Friday you were on duty. Whether it was duty taxi or duty chippy run I'm sure that I wouldn't have lasted with having to walk back every week to Lookout Camp with all those open trenches still around, let alone the old liver!

Oooh, just had a memory of a certain WRAF all dressed in her best HQ BFFI blues that slipped/fell into a water filled trench just off the beaten track :E Makes true the term 'Splash one good night' :(

The problem with returning a few years later on a flying tour, was that the element of danger was taken away with the introduction of and move to the 'Death Star'.
Happy Days!:ok:

[rock34]

It was 2 PARA actually who were there last year, but I do remember the RRB being the worst of the bunch. I'm sure everyone who was on the islands at the time will remember the incident in the WO and Sgts Mess one Friday night. For those not there, I believe the words to CBFSAI were along the lines of: "Who the f+$k invited you into our Mess?" Classic! (Note that lack of 'Sir'! Scandalous)

To be fair to the pongos though, the young SAC who strolled into CBFSAI's house late one evening having had a few shandies, and then put the tele on and parked his feet on the table comes a very close second in the all time classics.

[Laarbruch72]

Is the Upland Goose still going in Stanley?


Read the post I went to the trouble of typing, only about 3 before yours! :O It states:

(the upland goose) is now a row of refurbished houses, some of it belonging to the Antarctic Survey. Has been for a long time. So a load of scientists would probably be nonplussed at finding a pissed up airman in their lounge.
IF anyone of the officer class is down town it's more likely to be the Malivina House Hotel. Very nice it is too.

Rock: I was probably there at the same time as you, as our ESPN watching pisshead was only just gone from theatre. The army cheek biting / ripping incident happened only about 3 months later.

[wiggy]

Of course those old enough to remember the Rangatira (HMS Smelly) will know that, when , on a Friday night, the bar was seemed to be revolving, all was well because it was because the wind/tide had changed direction, nowt to do with the beer. :}

[MAINJAFAD]

Or you could have the OC of the RIC (Welsh Guards) dancing naked on a table in the SNCO's mess at MPA about 4 months ago. He was on a 767 quite quickly as well.

[BEagle]

The reason why there was no charge for food and accommodation at RAF Mount Pleasant was because we worked a 6 day week.....allegedly.

But the number of vehicles in the car park on Saturday mornings showed that not many people actually did so; perhaps the Happy Hours took rather a toll? 1312, of course, have a 'dry' detachment being on standby 24/7...or rather, the VC10 crew are.

The helo boss, 'JJ', got rather fed up with the fag charioteers and their smelly old mat, so went one better. During Happy Hour, the end window opened and an MS26 appeared, followed by 'JJ'. Grinning merrily, he pulled on the lanyard with the predictable result.... Then invitations were issued for cocktails aboard his rubber battleship - to all except the fag charioteers who were left talking to themselves on their scruffy old mat.

RW style......:ok:

[Wander00]

I was at the first ever Happy Hour at Mount Pleasant, having signed for the complex to become known as Deathstar at 1400 one afternoon, to be furnished from 41 ISO containers by 8am the next day. Ghurka Major of 2/2 GR came to my rescue by saying his chaps would empty 21 of 41! We opened RAF Mount Pleasant on 1 May 1986, and the hooter for the first ground defence exercise went about 3am the next morning!

[GOLF_BRAVO_ZULU]

Serious question: as I was usually still working through "happy hour"; what incentive did it have towards getting p**sed? On the few occasions that I did get there in time, I can only remember chips and other nibbles that you didn't really want or need; it was only few hours from "free" dins anyway. I do not recall the price of the beer (OK, I'm a peasant) reducing. :confused:

[Spit the Dog]

ROCK34... thanks for the reminder.. the morning after (Sat) was more embarrassing having to report with every mess member to the bar at 12.00 hrs for a "Right will the guilty B...... take one pace forward" brief from COS. It was a 'I'm Sparticus' moment! ....

[Wyler]

Although not a great fan of the Army, they did play a blinder at one Happy Hour. About 8 of their officers turned up in green overalls with sticky orange plastic 'badges' stuck all over them. They cleared a place in the middle of the throng amd proceeded to form a circle. They refused to let anyone else in and only spoke to each other, in VERY loud voices.

They said they were fighter pilots...............:}:ok:

[BEagle]

...the complex to become known as Deathstar...

I suspect that I may have been guilty of giving the place its name; on 15 May 1986 during OP. LAMPUCA (51 flying hours in 9 days..:\) we were billeted in the ex-contractor's huts, but went to the main facility for messing. Walking across for dinner with some chums, I said "It looks just like the DeathStar!" - so that's what we called it from then on.

The name seems to have stuck!

[Ali Qadoo]

Ah, OP LAMPUCA - Wattisham to MPA via ASI and back - 9 hour trips sitting on a bang-seat: brings a whole new meaning to the phrase "pain in the bum".

Also seem to recall that people were already calling MPA "The Death Star" when I turned up for my stint on 23 at Stanley (Sep 85-Jan 86).

The only bright spot of LAMPUCA was diverting into Tenerife South on the way home from ASI and getting stuck in a v nice hotel for 5 days with a friendly VC 10 crew and a very large imprest.

[Art Field]

Ali Qadoo

As the captain of said VC10 crew, I remember the occasion only too well. We were only too happy to provide you with the necessary to survive the rigours of Tenerife though my wife did not apreciate my missing our 25 wedding anniversary. Recovered from your hangover yet ?.

[high spirits]

I remember constantly being asked the question of whether we could get a chinny to South Georgia from MPA every time I went down there - usually came from the resident idiot F3 backseat OC Air Wg. The answer was always the same, yes in theory, only just, but why? My abiding memories of Friday night .... if there are any left:

1700-happy hour
1730 medics bar for some gin from a surgical drip
1830-Brintels, one of my favourite dives on this sorry planet
2200 Timmys for some w**ker dancing

Con Coughlin, the idiot who wrote this article has clearly never been to MPA. The fag chariot crews only drank chocolate milk anyway and were in bed by 9pm every night! The 2 most P8ssed humans on the island were always the doc and the dentist, closely followed by the bish.

[Willard Whyte]

The Queen Vic was always a popular watering hole. Gone now?

[Ali Qadoo]

Art Field - eternally in your debt! Don't know about recovering from the hangover, but I had to bring my liver home in a bag!

[Laarbruch72]

The Queen Vic was always a popular watering hole. Gone now?


Long gone.

[Willard Whyte]

Shame. A great local during my tour.

[Laarbruch72]

Most bars have closed to be honest. Bars which were open on my first tour there and had closed* by my last tour (this year) include:
The Queen Vic, Steamers Bridge, Cats Cradle, Sharkeys, Shady's, Lot 22.

The bars which remain open generally are (surprise surprise) the 2 big Naafis. Maybe it's a protectionism thing by Naafi, maybe it's to keep trouble in one place.

*By closed I mean closed to the "general public". One or two remain as strictly section bars while others are now derelict.

[BEagle]

Well, that doesn't surprise me...

I once did a stint as Dep OCAW filling in for someone at a few days' notice (due to crass micromanagement, but that's another story..) - after a couple of fires had been reported, one of which was very nasty, a lot of the 'pubs' came under close scrutiny. Although at the time the 'Queen Vic.' escaped closure, my (unexpressed) thoughts were that it wasn't as well controlled as it had been in earlier times, so I guessed that its days were probably numbered....:rolleyes:

After 2 cigarette smoke induced fire alarms and evacuations of the nearby accommodation in the early hours, 1435 were also told that the Goose would be shut down if they didn't sort things out sharpish. "How can we justify a casual bar in a Officers' Mess which already has an official casual bar?" was the question put to OC1435.

Unfortunately the OM 'casual' bar had less atmosphere than Pluto. Are the pongos still saluting eachother in the corridors, pretending that they're in some part of Surrey and demanding that jackets and ties will be worn in the Officers' Mess bar after 1900? Perhaps if the DeathStar dress rules were a little less last century, then there would be less demand for the unofficial shebeens.

Confining the trouble to known areas is probably not a bad thing - but what a shame that the idiot few have clearly wrecked things for the sensible many.

As for the RIC; fortunately during my time it was the Brigade of Ghurkas. What a splendid military organisation they are!

[SilsoeSid]

I suspect that I may have been guilty of giving the place its name; on 15 May 1986 during OP. LAMPUCA (51 flying hours in 9 days..:\) we were billeted in the ex-contractor's huts, but went to the main facility for messing. Walking across for dinner with some chums, I said "It looks just like the DeathStar!" - so that's what we called it from then on.

:hmm:
I'm sure that by the time I left, aboard the first 747 departure on 4 June '85, the place had already been christened 'Deathstar'.