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cornish-stormrider
1st Sep 2010, 16:09
OK, now I have your attention I would like to ask what would be your nomination for Aircraft Porn - You know, an aircraft that the mere sight or memory or sound of gives you "wood"

For me there were several - and no, I won't tell about my fetishes, but the winner came (ahem) down to a choice between:

Avro Vulcan
or
TSR-2

so come on, spill the beans.

handysnaks
1st Sep 2010, 16:13
So, whangito the Mexican wonder donkey is not what you were after then?

aw ditor
1st Sep 2010, 16:25
Sound of a RR' Merlin!

Green Flash
1st Sep 2010, 16:51
I agree with aw ditor.

The sound of a Merlin always causes me to prick up my ears.













:E

Tankertrashnav
1st Sep 2010, 16:58
Hunter doing a high speed low pass - the famous "blue note" - ahhhh!!!

proudfishead
1st Sep 2010, 17:37
Sound of an AW' Merlin

Blighter Pilot
1st Sep 2010, 17:45
Lancaster with +7 inches of boost set!

billynospares
1st Sep 2010, 17:59
our beautiful old comet. she was a lovely lady :D

163627
1st Sep 2010, 18:14
Re the TSR-2 would it really have been a world beater, or was it just an average workhorse or could it even have been a lemon? Like other icons that died young (e.g. James Dean and Princess Dianna) is it a "great" only because we never had the chance to see it worts an all and thus can create our own individual fantasy as to what might have been?

goudie
1st Sep 2010, 18:25
A P51 at 30' on full chat

YouTube - P-51 Mustang super low pass (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yrDWYOlLA-w)

StopStart
1st Sep 2010, 18:28
To be fair, 'planes generally piss me off (to paraphrase the great Eric Cartman) however there is little that will beat the sight and sound of a Spitfire or Hurricane. Whilst walking the South Downs Way recently (great work for charity (http://sorefeet.squarespace.com/) etc etc :ok:) I had just passed a small memorial to a WWII german pilot shot down in 1940 when a lone Spitfire flew low and fast overhead (going into Shoreham I guess). Stirring stuff indeed....

SirToppamHat
1st Sep 2010, 18:32
Merlin-Engined Spitfire.

I always thought the TSR 2 was rather boxy and ugly (though I never saw it fly).

STH

charliegolf
1st Sep 2010, 18:33
The 104. Great con trick, I know, but i can't help it.

CG

Neptunus Rex
1st Sep 2010, 18:41
Four Rolls Royce Speys at full chat, somewhat low altitude, used to give Spanish fishermen knee-tremblers, eh Fin!

http://www.augk18.dsl.pipex.com/Smileys/trip.gif

Standby!
1st Sep 2010, 18:45
Sound of a Tonka from the runway caravan. I can still feel my chest vibrating now! Wow. Rubbish airplane though! :ouch:

Cows getting bigger
1st Sep 2010, 18:47
I'm going back to a certain West German RAF base that was the home of one or two Harrier squadrons and some rather ebullient helicopter pilots. It is the middle of summer and a few of the singlies are sat outside the Mess enjoying a Pimms or two at the end of a particularly arduous Sunday afternoon playing tennis. The whole of Germany is stuck in an unfeasibly warm high pressure system - the air is still and sublimely quiet. There is a distant sound that over a number on minutes develops into the most jaw-droppingly beautiful deep rumble as two perfectly synchronised Merlins arrive over the airfield.

The British Aerospace Mosquito has arrived back from an airshow at Munster and has found it necessary to complete an impromptu set of wingovers.

Magnificent. :D

Bannock
1st Sep 2010, 19:07
Nip over to the "Russian subs stalk Trident" entry 82 and check out the bangers on that beauty. Ugly as sin but you just know she is bad.

Top tip - take some blue roll and a fresh pair of skivvies !!!!

bingofuel
1st Sep 2010, 19:12
A VC10 at take off, 4 Conways at full noise , and the noise just goes on and on even though the aeroplane is out of sight.

Art Field
1st Sep 2010, 19:29
Make that fun bus really heavy, drop the temperature below freezing and hear those Conways snap crackle and pop.

Saintsman
1st Sep 2010, 19:30
I was standing next to a VC-10 during engine runs and as it went to full power the whole nacelle moved forward 6 inches. Hard on or what?

AR1
1st Sep 2010, 19:30
The 104.
That - or more to the point 4 of them, was the first thing that came (cough) to mind. They took me from behind (cough) at St Mawgan about '81, and I nearly bricked myself. The organ (cough) pipe noises as they turned, were amazing.

However I also stood in awe at the Mozzie repeatedly buzzing Lyneham Tower in the early 90's.

I'll sleep on it.

Jimbo27
1st Sep 2010, 19:32
Are we not due a joke about a pair of big Bristols?





I meant a Beaufighter...

The Magic Rat
1st Sep 2010, 20:03
No contest - Phantom FG.1

Gnd
1st Sep 2010, 20:06
Nahh, it has to be the lightning pointing 90 degrees up!

DFM
1st Sep 2010, 20:14
Got to agree with Neptunus Rex.........4 blow jobs (the Mighty Speys) were always better than 1 fanny (S King Jez). :D The mighty Bunter always leapt into the air overpowered, with a constitued crew, determined to not let a lady down (woof woof). Therefore, Nimrod = search,contact-in, track and kill......(just to appease the ladyship)......... while S King Jez = ping,ping,ping,ping,ping, contact..........oh no I've spilt my tea......ping,ping,ping,ping,ping, ....no duff, contact in...........oh sorry, its a whale (or a submarine) not quite sure......ping,ping, my batteries flat, can we go home pleeze..........and Mother is where exactly? ....... go on Pelican tell me more, tell me more,........is it love at first sight?

But don't worry, in the meantime the Merlin will fill the gap............oh you think so :ugh:..................go on, ask a Navy friend for the truth.

As they say, the one who invariably wins the battle, can see the wood (Nimrod) for the trees (RN soft porn) :mad: because as we know, something full of seamen will always lose it's appeal afte a quick loiter.....

Lets's all hope that SDSR doesn't let the lunatics out of the asylum....because if they do, it's bound to be messy............. especially when it's too late to abort the illegitimate child! :=

Sorry for over-use of graphics.............they just seem so appropriate
in a porn movie.

DFM

C130 Techie
1st Sep 2010, 20:37
It's got to be either 4 Olympus at max chat or a pair of Avons in max reheat!!

Shack37
1st Sep 2010, 20:45
Four Griffons almost in sync. Like an orchestra.

fincastle84
1st Sep 2010, 20:50
Four Rolls Royce Speys at full chat, somewhat low altitude, used to give Spanish fishermen knee-tremblers, eh Fin

Too right mate! Followed by a performance from Samantha in the crew room, or was that after you left?

(Photos of the said Samantha are available on request)

JEM60
1st Sep 2010, 21:05
XB 70 Valkyrie. I have seen it, but, oh, how I would have loved to have seen it fly!!!!

monkeytennis
1st Sep 2010, 21:29
Lightning, preferably vertical, burners on. UNFFF! :O

Neptunus Rex
2nd Sep 2010, 02:39
No Fin, I never did see Samantha. However, in my Neptune days in Townsville there was an Ozzie stripper who rejoiced in the artistic, imaginative soubriquet of 'Vanessa Undressa!'

Gentleman Jim
2nd Sep 2010, 06:08
Rack up the volume and close your eyes!

P2nlGN6aS8g

In jet aircraft there can be no greater sound than the Hawker Hunter or Gloster Meteor hitting the 'blue note'!

mo8jMhksKOU&feature=related

Listen to the Gloster Meteor 'blue note' at 13 seconds

MT3u4Q7NLFY&feature=related

Blacksheep
2nd Sep 2010, 06:53
The Lancaster and the Vulcan. Dreadful working conditions back then, but I was only 19 years old and those aircraft have character.

Firestorm
2nd Sep 2010, 07:18
fincastle84 would that be the same Samantha who keeps score on the great Radio 4 comedy panel game "I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue"?

My favourite for aircraft porn is the Mighty Twin Otter, The Queen of The Skies :ok: Of course the PT6-27A with a 3 bladed prop is the best version, but in reality there is little to choose between a -200 or -300, but I haven't seen the -400 in flight yet. It was the first aeroplane that I sat in the left seat of in flight as a pilot's assisstant, and it was the first commercial type that I put on my license so it is a first love thing for those of you who were wondering about what you may consider a slightly strange choice :ok:

CargoMatatu
2nd Sep 2010, 07:20
Okay;

For "oldest" - has to be the Spitfire
For "less old, but still old" - the B52
For "more up-to-date" - the Boeing 747 always does it for me :ok:

aviate1138
2nd Sep 2010, 07:38
Does anyone have a source/link of a Javelin taxiing with that mournful 'vibrato' ?

dakkg651
2nd Sep 2010, 07:58
Just Google 'Napier Sabre engine sound' and listen to a Hawker Tempest on full song. :ok:

If only we could hear one for real. :hmm:

henry crun
2nd Sep 2010, 07:59
Thank you Gentleman Jim for the links which show that there was only one true blue note, and that was from a Meteor.

Ah.. the memories.

MagnusP
2nd Sep 2010, 09:14
Any aircraft at all, as long as it's piloted by Jenna Haze. Nekkid. :E

603DX
2nd Sep 2010, 10:23
English Electric Canberra T4, Waddington, summer of 1957. Half an hour of "air experience" in my log book as an 18 year old CCF cadet at the annual week's camp. The F/O pilot glanced at my blue and white enamel gliding badge earned earlier that year, pinned proudly on my tunic pocket. As I struggled to do up the straps in the right hand seat, he said "I see you have some flying experience. Want a bit more?" Did I!!!!

For five or ten glorious, heart-racing minutes he let me have the controls as we whooshed around Lincolnshire, with gentle, gentle banks and very, very slight climbs and dives; the most exciting, almost visceral experience of my life up to that moment. Thank you, thank you, anonymous F/O, for instigating my only love affair with an inanimate object, the sleek, sexy EE Canberra.

Gentleman Jim
2nd Sep 2010, 10:26
And of course, my all time favourite soundtrack of the Spitfire, followed with the words spoken by many German pilots I am sure, during dog fights over the English Channel. Turn it up loud now!

hvDDDKnNhuE&feature=related

greuzi
2nd Sep 2010, 10:32
GJ,
Sorry for thread skip. Any news on the DG thing?

Great video btw.
G

Think I might know the pilot. POD?

Fire and brimstone
2nd Sep 2010, 10:39
My favourite, all-time porn star is Latisha Airedale.

"Woof-woof".

Gentleman Jim
2nd Sep 2010, 10:57
greuzi

Check pm's.

FLCH
2nd Sep 2010, 11:23
Back to the thread:

http://www2.printshop.co.uk/SiteData/ViolentVeg/Products/Images/XL/Corn_Star_Mug.jpg

Lonewolf_50
2nd Sep 2010, 11:45
T-28, with its manly 48" of manifold pressure, (or 52.5" at the sea level stop), and the deep, throaty roar of the Wright Cyclone engine ...

I still have a T-shirt that says "T-28 pilots do it with 48 inches" but it's up in a box in the attic.









As to actual porn stars, Bambi Woods was my favorite, followed by Desiré Cousteau.

dakkg651
2nd Sep 2010, 12:27
Lonewolf.

Sorry mate. The only radials that sound nice were made by Bristol. Compared to a Centaurus, the Cyclone sounds like a tractor.

The Allison sounds better. Bit like a watered down Merlin really. :E

Lonewolf_50
2nd Sep 2010, 12:29
There is no accounting for taste ... ;)

But on that note, I found that the afterburner roar of the F-16 and F-15, which I still refer to as the Blue Light Speical, lacked that special quality of an F-4S Phantom as it went off the cat at night in full burner.

Something was missing ...

Evanelpus
2nd Sep 2010, 12:41
You know, an aircraft that the mere sight or memory or sound of gives you "wood"

Much as I love aircraft, the day this ever happens, is the day I jump off a cliff!

The sound of a howling Olympus on take off and a vertically climbing Vulcan has been known to make the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. But "wood", nah!

dakkg651
2nd Sep 2010, 13:05
But on that note, I found that the afterburner roar of the F-16 and F-15, which I still refer to as the Blue Light Speical, lacked that special quality of an F-4S Phantom as it went off the cat at night in full burner.

I say old chap. Do you mean reheat?

Seriously. I wish I could see a Phantom or a Lightning display again. So more brutish than these dainty little Eurofighter thingies which just seem be trying to disappear up their own orifice when they display. Why they gave it the same name as a proper British fighter is beyond me.

Never mind. In five hours time I will be listening to the sonorous purr of a BBMF Spit at our Battle of Britain reception. Unless it is a grown up Spit of course. Then it will be a Griffon snarl. Why did RR change the firing order by the way?

Sorry if I'm rambling but the excitement is starting to give me 'wood'. :O

UserName330
2nd Sep 2010, 13:25
the Cessna 150 is a nice little aircraft.

dakkg651
2nd Sep 2010, 13:51
No it isn't!

pigboat
2nd Sep 2010, 15:59
Wot real engines sound like (big Pratt.) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RFoM5z05MgI)

and

Small Pratt. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pqcDNvx_H_I)

Tankertrashnav
2nd Sep 2010, 16:11
and a vertically climbing Vulcan


Vertically climbing? Goodness, you Vulcan groupies do exaggerate! Just because you cant get over the fact that the Victor was faster, carried a bigger bomb load, and what's most important, was far prettier than the Vulcan! (I'm talking Mk 1s here, the B2/K2 was never quite so pleasing to the eye).
Google Image Result for http://www.wingweb.co.uk/wingweb/img/450-Handley_page_victor_b1_hp.jpg (http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=http://www.wingweb.co.uk/wingweb/img/450-Handley_page_victor_b1_hp.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.wingweb.co.uk/aircraft/The_Handley_Page_Victor.html&usg=__JhiRr6QB5X3MxfhZ5-cJc3okBv4=&h=313&w=450&sz=21&hl=en&start=2&zoom=1&itbs=1&tbnid=9xVHNb1agL2MxM:&tbnh=88&tbnw=127&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dhandley%2Bpage%2Bvictor%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DG%26gb v%3D2%26tbs%3Disch:1)

Slasher
2nd Sep 2010, 16:59
In order -

1. The sound of a Rolley Rip Merlin!

2. An English Electric Lightning and or Avro Vulcan in vertical climb

3. A bunch of firewalled non-poofterised JT8Ds on a cold day

4. A bunch of same JT8Ds in full reverse on a cold day

5. The first-starting Allison to high RPM on the odd Herk or P3C

All give me a woody (but #2 invokes full-blown envy as well!)

An example of #3 (turn your speakers up) -


gwel7Ulmrvs

Man it was great to fly jets when they had real grunt! :ok:

Lonewolf_50
2nd Sep 2010, 17:00
I say old chap. Do you mean reheat?
I meant exactly what I said: afterburner. ;)

You are free to call it what you like, of course. :ok:

Loki
2nd Sep 2010, 17:11
If we are talking porn, surely the Hunter "blue note" would be number one?

sled dog
2nd Sep 2010, 18:09
The growl of an AN22 at t/o power; and of course the Merlin :ok:

Tankertrashnav
2nd Sep 2010, 18:20
2. An English Electric Lightning and or Avro Vulcan in vertical climb




Slasher - Lightning? - yup! Vulcan? - never! (see post 54 above) :ugh:

Slasher
2nd Sep 2010, 18:29
Ok the Avro Vulc in a steep climb!

Tankertrashnav
2nd Sep 2010, 18:46
Yes that I'll accept! We didn't do steep climbs in Victor 1s, we wanted to stay low as long as possible so folks on the ground could admire our elegant profile ;)

JEM60
2nd Sep 2010, 20:05
Don't forget guys, masses of Merlins and Griffons at Duxford this week-end. 15 Spitfires, so I've heard....drool, drool, etc....

JEM60
2nd Sep 2010, 20:09
GREUZI.
The Spitfire pilot was, Mr. S. Grey, I believe. Interestingly, the commentator is Alain De Cadenet, father of Amanda [supermodel] and himself a Spitfire owner and pilot for some time. It was done, of course, at Duxford.

pigboat
2nd Sep 2010, 21:12
How ya doing Slasher? I'll see your JT8 and raise you a Spey. ;)

G2 takeoff at PGV. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wrnu10tXeMY&feature=related)

Sir George Cayley
2nd Sep 2010, 21:28
For me the Lockheed F104 Starfighter sounded absolutely great on full power for take off :ok:

But then it had a trick up its sleeve..........

Down wind - pull the throttle back quickly to flight idle and she sang:D

It was an eerie wail I've never heard since - sent shivers it did.

Sir George Cayley

tony draper
2nd Sep 2010, 21:55
This is the best recent Vulcan clip watch it in HD Full Screen and turn your sound full up.:E
YouTube - vulcan bomber at yeovilton (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Djd1pPQZ_LE&feature=related)

G-CPTN
2nd Sep 2010, 22:36
The Spitfire pilot was, Mr. S. Grey, I believe.
I thought it was Ray Hanna . . .

Couldn't have happened to a nicer chap! (de Cadenet) :E

pigboat
2nd Sep 2010, 23:14
Saw one at an air show years ago in Toronto Mr. D that did just that. Only difference mine had a murtherin' big missile slung underneath. :eek:

Slasher
3rd Sep 2010, 05:25
How ya doing Slasher? I'll see your JT8 and raise you a Spey.

Doing ok Piggy! Yep I'll certainley give you the Speys. Your
vid invoked an old memorey as a kid holidaying in Melbourne
Oz near Essendon airport where a Senior-Speyed GII would
rocket out every morning at 6am. Id get up early and treadly
out to watch it. I think it was with a mob called Asociated
Airlines but I could be wrong it was so long ago.

Thanks for that vid too Drapes! :ok:

dakkg651
3rd Sep 2010, 07:01
I meant exactly what I said: afterburner. http://images.ibsrv.net/ibsrv/res/src:www.pprune.org/get/images/smilies/wink2.gif

Lonewolf.

No no no. An afterburner is what you get the morning after a good curry.

It's when your rear end feels like the start of bonanza! :(

Evanelpus
3rd Sep 2010, 10:05
Vertically climbing? Goodness, you Vulcan groupies do exaggerate! Just because you cant get over the fact that the Victor was faster, carried a bigger bomb load, and what's most important, was far prettier than the Vulcan! (I'm talking Mk 1s here, the B2/K2 was never quite so pleasing to the eye).

That's it. Outside in the car park right now!

e-jet190
3rd Sep 2010, 10:38
How about one with big knockers ?

airborne_artist
3rd Sep 2010, 11:16
This is the gal for me:

pbu14MtqEiU

Tell me you couldn't spend all night with that 2,480 hp Bristol ;)

SASless
3rd Sep 2010, 12:07
When these old girls did their show.....some body was fecked!


http://www.chinook-helicopter.com/chinook/images/64_13149.jpg

2-20mm cannon
5-.50 cal MG's
1-40mm Grenade Launcher
38- 2.75 inch Rockets

(....and in a pinch....add one .45 Caliber M-1911 Pistol stuck out a cockpit window!)

minigundiplomat
6th Sep 2010, 17:40
Chinook would do it for me too. Failing that....

Vulcan
Phantom

Um, Chinook?

Shmoo
6th Sep 2010, 18:47
Have to concur with Sir George on the sound of the 104. Many moons ago, I watched a four-ship of RCAF 104's do a flat break at Winnipeg. The banshee wail reverberates in my mind to this day!

JEM60
6th Sep 2010, 21:15
CPTN
Been told both names. Next time I see Stephen, I'll ask him.

Slasher
16th Sep 2010, 04:56
Sorry forgot the Lightning -

4vjQe92-w_I