Appointments in the Telegraph

[Art Field]

Why is it that there are never any Royal Air Force appointments in the Daily Telegraph. The Navy and The Army appear regularly and there are thousands of church postings. It would be nice to know how ones old mates or even old enemies are doing. Could it be that we would see how many senior officers there are holding strange jobs.

[Grys Dweizelschidt]

Perhaps the presumption is that the RAF is so small that you'd know everyone in it.:)

[threeputt]

For want of something better to do you could always go to the RAF website click on "Organisation" and then click on "Senior Appointments" and all will become clear!

3P:ok:

[HEDP]

Maybe the Royal Navy and the Army have it by way of a tradition. Maybe when the RAF is old enough to have traditions it might do something similar. Then again, why bother, when the RAF is subsumed again then you will find it happening for you anyway!

[airborne_artist]

Maybe when the RAF is old enough to have traditions it might do something similar.

I believe the RAF is just about old enough to have developed habits. :ok:

[higthepig]

Doesn't it cost to put notices in the Torygraph and all is spent from what I gather................

[bast0n]

AA

I believe the RAF is just about old enough to have developed habits.

And most of those are bad, as someone once stated......................:ok:

[Wander00]

There certainly used to be RAF appointments in the DT and Times, down to wg cdr posts-I still have a copy of the notice of my appointment to OC Handbrake House "somewhere in Cambridgeshire" in 1990.

[Python21]

Threeputt,

" RAF website click on "Organisation""

RAF and organisation in the same sentence, is that not close to an oxymoron?

P21

[vecvechookattack]

I believe the RAF is just about old enough to have developed habits

Military promotions and appointments have been published since 1655.

In that vayne, the RAF have another couple of hundred years before they can develop that habit.

[Maxibon]

Simple

In the financial mess we find ourselves in, you can have an option: either Daily Telegraph announcements or the Reds, not both.

:ok:

[Jackonicko]

Military promotions and appointments have been published since 1655.

In that vain, the RAF have another couple of hundred years before they can develop that habit.

In which vein?

When will shirtlifter WAFUs (as someone recently called them) learn to spell?

[Melchett01]

Maybe the Royal Navy and the Army have it by way of a tradition. Maybe when the RAF is old enough to have traditions it might do something similar.

That's a dangerous argument you are peddling there. Long standing tradition infers age. And with age comes senility, talking gibberish, permanently smelling of biscuits all shortly followed by death.

Therefore to take your line of argument to its logical conclusion, the RAF are the young upstarts, coming into their time whilst the Army and Navy are due for the old peoples' home at which point the RAF then takes it rightful place. :E

[Pontius Navigator]

Probably from the same budget that stopped producing the Air Force List and the Retired Officer List.

The latter was especially useful: it showed two things. One, that you were still alive and two, that you weren't a Walt.

[bast0n]

Jackonickers

When will shirtlifter WAFUs (as someone recently called them) learn to spell?

Never mind the spelling - post their addresses..............! We could all do with some garment altering in these difficult times.:ok:

[orgASMic]

Senior RAF appointments are published in the Times and Telegraph as and when they occur. The graduating officers from RAFC Cranwell are also listed the day after their graduation parades. The rest of us have to make do with the half yearly promotion lists in the London Gazette.
As for the Air Force List and Retired List, RAF Manning is supposed to be thrashing through the Data Protection Act issues before publishing them online on DII.

[bast0n]

My Lord Melchett,

That's a dangerous argument you are peddling there. Long standing tradition infers age. And with age comes senility, talking gibberish, permanently smelling of biscuits all shortly followed by death.

That's a dangerous argument you are peddling there. Long standing tradition infers age. And with age comes experience, talking sound common sense based on that experience, permanently getting to the biscuits before the upstarts due to cunning derived from that long experience, all shortly followed by mentions in the London Gazette and a long and happy retirement tickling crabs out of their shallow rock pools where they are to be found – due to their lack of experience – looking for biscuits…………………:ok:

[Melchett01]

bast0n ..... that's what my old instructor said. As we pushed his wheelchair in to the old fogies home!

[bast0n]

My Lord M

As we pushed his wheelchair in to the old fogies home!

Was he in the wheel chair - and did you damage the old fogies home?...:ok:

[bast0n]

My Lord M

I knew you would not believe me about -

tickling crabs out of their shallow rock pools where they are to be found – due to their lack of experience – looking for biscuits………………

I quite understand as I forgot to add the photo...................:ok:

http://i291.photobucket.com/albums/ll301/tallbronzedgod/jsf_Rock_pool.jpg

Happy biscuit hunting My Lord M :)

[Melchett01]

What a waste of a perfectly good biscuit!

And you Sir have all the hallmarks of being an ISS pedant / instructor. Now go hang your head in shame and talk to the other oldies about when English was taught proper and all that stuff.

[grobace]

A crab with no pincers - must be FAA or AAC, surely?

[bast0n]

GROBACE

A crab with no pincers - must be FAA or AAC, surely?

Crabs are awarded pincers at the end of basic flying training and an approved course in table manners.

Please do try and keep up!

My Lord M - what is an ISS pedant?:)

[Pontius Navigator]

As for the Air Force List and Retired List, RAF Manning is supposed to be thrashing through the Data Protection Act issues before publishing them online on DII.

I believe (believed) the AFL was published online 3 years ago.. Certainly the retired list, and some RAFR, were not published as the source was then the infamous JPA.

[Roland Pulfrew]

ISTR that appointment lists in the DT & Times (with the exception of promotion lists) were taken as a savings measure, along with The Air Force List and "blue letters", when Innsworth moved to HW. :uhoh: So much for ethos and heritage.

[Melchett01]

Roland - this is the same RAF that let Bentley Priory, our spritual home and the the heart of the defence of the country when all else in Europe was falling to the Nazis, go at the stroke of a pen.

If our illustrious leadership can get rid of that sort of ethos and history at the stroke of a pen, do you really think they are going to bat an eyelid about the promotion of a few minions being mentioned in the press being cut?

FWIW, having held at BP and knowing the story behind its deminse, I doubt I will ever forgive the hierachy for that one.

[Grys Dweizelschidt]

FWIW, having held at BP and knowing the story behind its deminse, I doubt I will ever forgive the hierachy for that one.

I'm intrigued. What's a deminse?

[SL Hardly-Worthitt]

or indeed I doubt I will ever forgive the hierachy for that one.

...really MELCHETT...do better, or lose the argument along with the title!!!!!

:=:=:=

H-W

[bast0n]

Sir Hardly - Doneby

I thought that you would like to see My Lord Meltchitt doing his weekend homework........................:ok:


http://i291.photobucket.com/albums/ll301/tallbronzedgod/jsf_MudCrabScylla_serrata.jpg

[Melchett01]

Yes yes yes, very funny. Two typos in how many posts?! And in my defence, I was dealing with some very stroppy fitters who had upset Mrs M, so I think I can be excused.

However, if bast0n et al demand it, I will instigate suitable measures to ensure it never happens again and go and beat my servants and get them to read the dictionary on my behalf. Incidentally bast0n, I think you'll find the encouraged / approved dictionary is the latest version of the COD rather than Collins!

[bast0n]

My Lord

Incidentally bast0n, I think you'll find the encouraged / approved dictionary is the latest version of the COD rather than Collins!

I thought it best if yu stated on the esay virsion....................:ok:

[grobace]

How do you encourage a dictionary? To do what? Perhaps a copy of Fowler or Roget would serve Melchett better.
But there's a crab that clearly passed both the eating and the flying course!

[Two-Tone-Blue]

Gentlemen, please. We are brothers in arms, regardless of capbadge.

I had the privilege and vague pleasure of reading the then CAS's comments about the closure of Upavon, the Founding Font of Crab-dom, and likewise the demise of that historic building, wherein sat ACM Dowding, at Bentley Priory.

Personally, I would opine that Aldershot should be bulldozed for the safety of the local populace [although they merit little recognition]. Portsmouth is beyond the pale already, and deserves no further comment.

[ShyTorque]

Crabs are awarded pincers at the end of basic flying training and an approved course in table manners.
Please do try and keep up!

Really? Since when? :confused:

[bast0n]

Shietalk

1918..................:ok:

[ShyTorque]

In that case, in your own words: "Do keep up". :p

Sir Douglas Bader presented the last sets of post BFTS wings to 15 course at RAF Linton on Ouse in 1976. Since that date, RAF wings have not been presented until after AFTS.

[minigundiplomat]

The RN are only jealous. They have to live with the fact that most of their 'appointments' are printed in the classified section of the Gay News.

[Easy Street]

ShyTorque,

Unfortunately for you, bast0n is right - some of us do get our wings at the end of basic flying training! Since about 2002, the flying badge has been awarded to students graduating from Basic Fast Jet Training at Linton-on-Ouse. The studes who had already gone on to the Advanced course at Valley were all presented with their wings at a big "super grad". I don't know why it changed; it seems a bit premature to me, given the cumulative chop rate over the 2 halves of Valley.

[ShyTorque]

ES, Thanks, That's why I asked the question; I did think it might have changed back again but Baston said it never had changed. I was a few courses behind number 15 and we were very disappointed to be told we now had to wait until after AFTS. I eventually gained my flying badge in 1979 (and kept it).

Guess why the system was all changed in 1976? Too many students were being subsequently chopped at Valley! What goes around, etc.

But what fast jet training is now done at Linton?

[bast0n]

TINYTODGERDIPLOMAT

I think I know now why you make posts like this refering to the RN:-

They have to live with the fact that most of their 'appointments' are printed in the classified section of the Gay News.

I think you should "ComeOut" as I think I have found an old photo of you:ok:http://i291.photobucket.com/albums/ll301/tallbronzedgod/jsf_Pink_Crab.jpg


ShyTorque

This is not meant to be a history lesson - but a bit of banter...................:)

[minigundiplomat]

A pink crab - amazing!

Now be a good chap or I'll take your ipod away and force you to eat pizza with a fat bird.

Come to think of it, being held by a bunch of iranian soldiers must be a dream fro a matelot - no wonder they were so quick to surrender and hand over their 'weapons'.

Still, when the carriers are binned you can always get a job in the city - outside Kings Cross?

[ShyTorque]

ShyTorque
This is not meant to be a history lesson

But you started it.

I'm a bit worried that you know so much about crabs and gays..

[bast0n]

ShyTorque

I'm a bit worried that you know so much about crabs and gays..

I have served with many crabs - most of them, after a little couthing up, have been great fun.

My knowledge of "gays" - such a lovely word taken over by the unlovely - has come mostly from your pink crab compatriot Tiny Todger Diplomat. I have bought a ticket to Kings Cross in the hope of a free drink as I have heard that they are very generous and perhaps TTD is lurking in a nearby fountain clutching a MacVities cash card?

I think also the TTD may actually be a hermit crab as he seems reluctant to "come out" when the finger of fate is tickling his fancy...........:ok:

[minigundiplomat]

Baston,

I must apologise for leading you on, but I'm not in the Navy at all! I am in the RAF and therefore I will not be meeting you at Kings Cross. I am merely passing on a few crewroom whispers from our navy exchange chums, who sometimes do a bit of flying when they tire of their Village people costumes.

Just to lay all my cards on the table, in this seasonal display of honesty, I must confess that my todger is far from tiny, and I am not actually a diplomat or diplomatic in any shape, manner or form. Please keep your peverse fantasies within RN circles, if you must practice your service 'traditions' of constant manlove, ipod weeping and generally 'dripping' about how much everyone else is 'dripping' .

Without the complications of such inhibitive tradition, the RAF can then go about it's primary role of providing aircraft, tapping wenches and getting on with life without the need for constant referrals to other branches of the military as 'crabs'. We dropped the pongo banter about 15 years ago, accepting the future lay in shared infrastructure.

As noone actually wants your infrastructure, including the government it would seem, I can understand how this problem may arise. If it makes you feel loved, wanted or even relevant then feel free to refer to us as crabs.

All better now?

[bast0n]

TTD

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!!:ok:

You did not like the pictures then?

I must apologise for leading you on, but I'm not in the Navy at all! I am in the RAF

I do like that!! To think that anyone would think from your writings that you were in the Royal Navy is marvellous. Delusions of grandeur creeping in here!Pink Crab perhaps - but it is legal you know.................so don't worry:ok:

[Blacksheep]

For the benefit of all our Pongo and Matelot wimpish mates, this is a real crab. Easily recognised by its light blue exo-skeleton and the ability to crack anything that comes its way.

http://www.breakitdownblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/coconut_plus_crab.jpg

[Gainesy]

Since that date, RAF wings have not been presented until after AFTS.

Cept for Billy the Fish, whose previous wings' "of course they count" status was studiously ignored last week when the lad got a second set... and a Chicken Suit from the RNZAF.

[Tourist]

Blacksheep.

Easily recognised by its attempt to hump some hairy nuts...

[taxydual]

40 all

New Balls Please

[bast0n]

Blacksheep

Brilliant nut cracker - but I think it is a lobster.............!

or it could be a butterfly as it seems to have wings on it's back............Oh no, here we go again.......................:ok:

[Union Jack]

BastOn

I apologise if I'm spoiling your fun but, if you are wondering why MGD has gone silent and hasn't responded to your latest bait, it's probably because the light blue "powers-that-be" have tracked him down and - shock horror! -gently told him that, yes, what was once described as "the love that dare not speak its name" is alive and well in the light blue and, according to proud2serve :: Royal Air Force :: Home (http://www.proud2serve.net/royalairforce/raf_news.htm), has apparently been positively encouraged for quite some time .....

On that basis alone, it's high time that his puerile and repetitious snide remarks about another Service ceased and, with any luck, were replaced by perfectly acceptable inter-Service banter.

Jack

[minigundiplomat]

Baston seems to recognise banter UJ, he can also return some. You, however, seem to be one of those people who don't mind taking a swipe at other services, but don't like it back.

On that basis alone, it's high time that his puerile and repetitious snide remarks about another Service ceased and, with any luck, were replaced by perfectly acceptable inter-Service banter.

Please go and do something nautical, tie a knot or feed the parrot and let Baston do the banter. Theres a good chap!

[Union Jack]

Oh dear, Minigonads, you sadly seem to have missed the point, as you have so often done before. If you took the trouble to do your staffwork properly, you would have discovered that I do indulge in banter, but without the need to indulge, as you do, in what are, quite frankly, cheap and nasty remarks "taking a swipe" at another Service. However, I have to say that your response is a vast improvement on some of your other posts, so I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt this time in the belief that it means that you actually have got the message.

Knot tied, parrot fed, and I'll be delighted to let Bast0n carry on producing his splendid montages while I carry on defending the dark blue by other means.:ok:

Jack

[bast0n]

UJ and Minigonads

A bit of thread creep here but with all the talk of not being able to afford the Red Arrows in the future I thought that in the interests of inter service co-operation and brotherly love,(pun intended), I show a possible solution below.

WELCOME TO THE BLUE CRABS FORMATION TEAM...................:ok:


http://i291.photobucket.com/albums/ll301/tallbronzedgod/jsf_Blue_crab_formation.jpg

PS am working on the smoke.....................:)

[minigundiplomat]

Surely in todays PC climate there is some rule against making rare blue crabs smoke. I wouldnt leave yourself open to legal action.......

[Union Jack]

Surely in today's PC climate there is some rule against making rare blue crabs smoke ....?

.... but presumably OK if it's as in "Do you smoke after intercourse?" "I don't know - I've never looked!":eek:

Jack