View Full Version : Indispensible and dispensible jobs.

21st Apr 2009, 09:37
In prospect of many employees being dispensed with due to the recession, what jobs (such as undertakers) are essential and will always need to exist and what jobs could be abandoned entirely without anyone noticing?
Do we really need stockbrokers?

Howard Hughes
21st Apr 2009, 09:42
what jobs are essential
Given the ever increasing obese society we live in...

Macca's employees?:}
what jobs could be abandoned entirely without anyone noticing?

The Reserve Bank Govenor? The Treasurer? They are mere spectators like the rest of us!:ooh:

21st Apr 2009, 09:55
I can't remember if it was an old boss of mine who said it, or an overheard conversation between undertakers: 'Graveyards are full of indispensible people'

When it comes down to it no job is truly indispensible is it? Otherwise B&Q and the like would never make a profit. Damage-it-yourself, that's the spirit.

I like the idea of a DIY funeral.

21st Apr 2009, 10:07
A fair point; and ecologically sound;


21st Apr 2009, 10:14
Are you suggesting that the terminally ill should build a pyre and self-immolate?

21st Apr 2009, 10:22
Do we really need stockbrokers?

Don't many people already use self service Internet trading sites?

Pretty much everything these days can be automated; it's just cheaper to use people. I used to add that they still need humans to take care of the cleaning, but even that could be automated if there were not so many low cost people around.

21st Apr 2009, 10:29
Heavens no! That would be terrible. No need for all that dreadful Liberace-like palaver, the best suit, formaldehyde and make up though. Silk lined caskets with all the trimmings not required.

I just want to help bring on the roses in my garden.

Actually, I was discussing this rather morbid topic with Mrs C recently when stuck in the car on a long journey. She decided that she wants to be re-incarnated as a bunny. Now the best solution that I can work up is to transfer her carbon atoms as efficiently as possible.

So we decided that her ashes would be put in a planter with dandelion seeds. The dandelions would be intensively fed to a pet doe rabbit over the gestation period, having been inseminated by the then incumbent buck dwarf lop, who would also get served the dandelion treat. A proportion of the rabbits favourite 'Mrs C dandelion' would inevitably end up as baby bunny. Hence I could fulfil her wish to the best of my ability. Assuming of course that I don't peg it first.

21st Apr 2009, 10:35
Of course not C-CPTN, Building the pyres would give the stockbrokers something to do.

21st Apr 2009, 11:11
Traffic wardens
Members of Parliament
Chat-show hosts
Call-centres in Bangalore

Dustmen (or whatever they're called this week...)
Page 3 Ladies

21st Apr 2009, 13:18

Most of these H & S dogooders!
Company accountants! Let's go back to the days when company's were run by people that had there finger on the pulse not people who are worried obout how many paperclips we use!
Traffic Police! There seems to be enough camera's these days! Put proper Bobbys on the beat!


As 27mm says, and the two old ladies that open up the local cafe at 0500 every morning to cook a top breakfast for a lot of people who do indepensible jobs (Dustman, Postman etc)

21st Apr 2009, 13:23
Just saw this on the BBC website

BBC NEWS | Education | Advisers are parents' school link (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/education/8009919.stm)

Apparently, there are now publicly funded 'parent support advisors' to help parents liase with schools.

Dispensable? Yes, I think so.

tony draper
21st Apr 2009, 13:33
Midwife and Undertaker the time you spend betwixt the two depends upon one's success in studious avoidment of the medical profession.

Burnt Fishtrousers
21st Apr 2009, 13:45
"Do we really need stockbrokers? "

If I painted my back yard white and divided up into 100 squares each representing FTSE 100 company, and whichever square my dog shat into that day, I put money into, chances are i'd do better then a stock broker.. and my dog wouldn't take a vast commission for losing me money...a few doggie biscuits would suffice for this total lack of expertise:E

Pinky the pilot
21st Apr 2009, 14:08
Dispensible; All the managers Qantas recently let go.

21st Apr 2009, 14:48
Our Discip Flight Sergeant in the Waddington Gin Palace had this poem on the wall.

Sometime when you're feeling important;
Sometime when your ego 's in bloom;
Sometime when you take it for granted,
You're the best qualified in the room:
Sometime when you feel that your going,
Would leave an unfillable hole,
Just follow these simple instructions,
And see how they humble your soul.

Take a bucket and fill it with water,
Put your hand in it up to the wrist,
Pull it out and the hole that's remaining,
Is a measure of how much you'll be missed.
You can splash all you wish when you enter,
You may stir up the water galore,
But stop, and you'll find that in no time,
It looks quite the same as before.

The moral of this quaint example,
Is to do just the best that you can,
Be proud of yourself but remember,
There's no indispensable man.

I was labelled a Communist Sympathiser when, during a course run by the Army Education Corps, we were given ten occupations and were asked to place a them in ranking order. I had the Dustbin Man at the top and the Bank Manager at the bottom of the list.

I explained that I had ranked the jobs in order of how much they would be missed if they disappeared.

21st Apr 2009, 14:58
According to airline financial wizards, aircraft engineers are
totally dispensable. Just a waste of cash.
Until the next crash at least.
Then it's their fault anyhow.
Even if they're not there at the time.

Blacksheep, had the same sort of "Commie" tag whilst working
on Vulcans years ago.
A mate, who worked in the "Bomb" facility, walked round for months
with a photo of Nikita Krushchov stuck in his security pass.
He took it out in the end, No-one even noticed it!!!!
Who needs armourers anyhow?

21st Apr 2009, 15:02
Indispensible: Teachers.

Who else will do the nation's childminding?


21st Apr 2009, 15:03
Our street has been blocked off for months for major roadworks on the main road at one end. [email protected] have been moving the barriers and driving through. Some of the neighbours decided to park adjacent to the barriers to prevent the rat-runners from doing so. One neighbour was given a ticket as her car was encroaching on a marked-off bus stop. Where no bus can reach cos the :mad: road is CLOSED :mad:. Utterly dispensible

21st Apr 2009, 15:09
I've been indispensable in the past, and it was not fun. It wasn't full-time indispensability, but I have had metal alloy furnaces losing hundreds of thousands an hour while I struggled to fix wires, and printing presses standing idle while I type as quickly as I can. In the latter job (computer tester / journalist) it happened more and more, because there's nothing like doing a job properly to get you more of the same work.

The hours became insane, with several 36-hour days a month. It got to the point where it was affecting my health, and on one occasion I managed to sit down a restaurant and immediately tip over to my side, chair and all. I felt I had to leave that job before something stupid happened. Being indispensable was not an experience I care to repeat in the future. :uhoh:

21st Apr 2009, 15:24
Me neither, but no-one noticed I'd gone anyhow.

21st Apr 2009, 16:26
Indispensable - Paramedics. :ok:

21st Apr 2009, 18:27
Actually its usually those on the lowest wages who are indespenable.

The people who clean the bogs etc. The ones that do all the jobs you would never want to do yourself.

Mind you, that doesn't include traffic wardens.

21st Apr 2009, 18:43
Parliamentary watchdogs would appear to be surplus to requirements in the UK.

Police baton trainers too.


22nd Apr 2009, 10:15

Don't many people already use self service Internet trading sites?

Pretty much everything these days can be automated;

Three words.

Algorithmic Hedge Fund.

Scary stuff. But apparently the best ones rode the financial shockwaves surprisingly well ! (down less than 10% over the period, which is probably many times better than people who take pot luck on internet trading sites).