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wall-e
12th Apr 2009, 11:06
Let see how many flying rules we will find!


1 Learn from the mistakes of others. You won't live long enough to make all of them yourself.

2 Flying isn't inherently dangerous. It's crashing that's dangerous.

3 Gravity is not just a good idea. It's the law. And it's not subject to appeal.

4 You start with a bag full of luck and an empty bag of experience. The trick is to fill the bag of experience before you empty the bag of luck.

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Rollingthunder
12th Apr 2009, 11:14
TEN OF MY RULES FOR AIR FIGHTING"

1. Wait until you see the whites of his eyes. Fire short bursts of 1 to 2 seconds and only when your sights are definitely 'ON'.

2. Whilst shooting think of nothing else, brace the whole of the body, have both hands on the stick, concentrate on your ring sight.

3. Always keep a sharp lookout. "Keep your finger out!"

4. Height gives You the initiative.

5. Always turn and face the attack.

6. Make your decisions promptly. It is better to act quickly even though your tactics are not the best.

7. Never fly straight and level for more than 30 seconds in the combat area.

8. When diving to attack always leave a proportion of your formation above to act as top guard.

9. INITIATIVE, AGGRESSION, AIR DISCIPLINE, and TEAM WORK are the words that MEAN something in Air Fighting.

10. Go in quickly - Punch hard - Get out!

Adolph Gysbert Malan DSO & Bar DFC (March 24, 1910 September 17, 1963), better known as Sailor Malan, was a South African World War II fighter pilot who led No. 74 Squadron RAF during the height of the Battle of Britain. Malan developed a set of simple rules for fighter pilots, which eventually could be found throughout RAF Fighter Command:

henry crun
12th Apr 2009, 11:47
Let not thy confidence exceed thy ability, for broad is the way to destruction.

radeng
12th Apr 2009, 12:14
The most useless things in flying are altitude above you, runway behind you and fuel in the bowser.

You only have too much fuel when you are on fire.

NZScion
12th Apr 2009, 12:15
Good airmanship is using your superior judgement to avoid situations requiring your superior flying skills...

BarbiesBoyfriend
12th Apr 2009, 12:56
Always take a bit of extra gas if you can.

Shitty things happen even in nice weather!

AcroChik
12th Apr 2009, 13:24
Don't spill your passengers' coffee.

Lon More
12th Apr 2009, 13:54
Doomed is he who navigates like a chemist, for he dispenses with accuracy.

Schumi - Red Baron
12th Apr 2009, 14:00
1) Every takeoff is optional. Every landing is mandatory.

2) Flying isn't dangerous. Crashing is what's dangerous.

3) It's always better to be down here wishing you were up there than up there wishing you were down here.

4) The propeller is just a big fan in front of the plane used to keep the pilot cool. When it stops, you can actually watch the pilot start sweating.

5) A 'good' landing is one from which you can walk away. A 'great' landing is one after which they can use the plane again.

6) You know you've landed with the wheels up if it takes full power to taxi to the ramp

wall-e
12th Apr 2009, 14:45
Never let an aircraft take you somewhere your brain didn't get to five minutes earlier.

Gordy
12th Apr 2009, 15:09
Basic Flying Rules:

1. Try to stay in the middle of the air.

2. Do not go near the edges of it.

3. The edges of the air can be recognized by the appearance of ground,
buildings, sea, trees and interstellar space. It is much more difficult to fly there.

Gooneyone
12th Apr 2009, 15:21
Maintain thy altitude, lest the earth arise and smitheth thee.

The Real Slim Shady
12th Apr 2009, 16:51
There is no good reason to fly through a thunderstorm in peacetime.

Wholigan
12th Apr 2009, 17:13
1. Don't smoke within 10 hours of flying.

2. Don't drink within 50 feet of the aircraft.

3. Don't pass a toilet on the way to the aircraft.

4. Don't waste an erection even if you are on your own.

Covers pretty much everything I reckon.

Jucky
12th Apr 2009, 17:15
Stick forward sheep get bigger.
Stick back sheep get smaller.

Wholigan
12th Apr 2009, 17:17
Keep stick back sheep eventually get bigger again.

PingDit
12th Apr 2009, 17:30
Log books; It's always preferable to have logged the same amount of takoffs as landings.

mr fish
12th Apr 2009, 18:49
if you see groundcrew running, you may wish to pull up.


unless they are running towards you!!

vonbag
12th Apr 2009, 19:59
Keep the brown side up by applying forward pressure on the stick & give gas, if you're flying upside-down
(as opposed to "keep the blue side up").
Never accept non-tech. guests in the cockpit, you might never know what happens next (even an unpredictable erection/resurrection).
Step on that ball and don't caress it, etc. ;-)

vapilot2004
12th Apr 2009, 20:18
A good captain does the walk around on cold rainy days.
Exception for UK departures: Replace 'captain' with 'FO'. :ok:

Lon More
12th Apr 2009, 20:51
A good FO is more than the Captain's Sexual Advisor

Rollingthunder
12th Apr 2009, 22:14
Avoid collisions, especially with the planet.

Gordy
12th Apr 2009, 22:49
Only three things a FO should say:

1. Nice landing sir
2. First round is on me
3. I'll take the fat chick, (or ugly guy for the female Captains).


Never fly the "A" model of anything.

galaxy flyer
12th Apr 2009, 23:31
Real Slim Shady

At Ubon RTAB, that was rewritten with the "in peacetime" part crossed out :}

bsmasher
13th Apr 2009, 01:04
The way to a small fortune in aviation starts with a big one

drw
13th Apr 2009, 02:41
Death is nature's way of reminding you of the importance of monitoring your airspeed at all times.

Gordy
13th Apr 2009, 03:32
Death is nature's way of reminding you of the importance of monitoring your airspeed at all times.

Unless one flies helicopters....

However:

Just remember, if you crash because of weather, your funeral will be held on a sunny day.

Brian Abraham
13th Apr 2009, 04:03
1. As an aviator in flight you can do anything you want... As long as it's right... And we'll let you know if its right after you get down.

2. You can't fly forever without getting killed.

3. As a fighter pilot only two bad things can happen to you and one of them will:
a. One day you will walk out to the aircraft knowing that it is your last flight in a fighter.
b. One day you will walk out to the airplane not knowing that it is your last flight in a fighter.

4. Success is being able to walk to your F.E.B.

5. There are Rules and there are Laws: The rules are made by men who think that they know better how to fly your airplane than you; and, the Laws (of Physics) were made by the Great One. You can, and sometimes should, suspend the rules but you can never suspend the Laws.

6. More about Rules:
a. The rules are a good place to hide if you don't have a better idea and the talent to execute it.
b. If you deviate from a rule, it must be a flawless performance, e.g., if you fly under a bridge, don't hit the bridge!

7. The fighter pilot is the highest form of life on earth.

8. The ideal fighter pilot is the perfect blend of discipline and aggressiveness.

9. About check rides:
a. Having someone climb into your fighter to grade how you fly is just like having someone come into your bedroom to grade how you perform.
b. The only real objective of a check ride is to complete it and get the *#%@&* out of your airplane.
c. It has never occurred to any flight examiner that the examinee could care less what the examiner's opinion of his flying ability really is.

10. The medical profession is the natural enemy of the aviation community.

11. The job of the Wing Commander is to worry incessantly that his career depends solely on the abilities of his aviators to fly their airplanes without mishap and that their only minuscule contribution to the effort is to bet their lives on it.

12. 'Ever notice that the only experts who decree that the age of the pilot is over are people who have never flown anything? Also, in spite of the intensity of their feelings that the pilot's day is over, I know of no such expert who has volunteered to be a passenger in a non-piloted aircraft.

13. It is absolutely imperative that the fighter pilot be unpredictable; rebelliousness is very predictable. In the end, conforming almost all the time is the best way to be unpredictable.

14. He who demands everything that his aircraft can give him is a pilot; he that demands one iota more is a fool.

15. If you're gonna fly low, do not fly slow!

16. It is solely the pilot's responsibility to never let any other thing touch his aircraft.

17. If you can learn how to fly as a Lt. and not forget how to fly by the time you're a LTC, you will have lived a happy life.

18. About night flying:
a. Remember that the airplane doesn't know that it's dark.
b. On a clear, moonless night, never fly between the tanker's lights.
c. There are certain aircraft sounds that can only be heard at night.
d. If you're going to night fly, it might as well be in the weather so you can double your exposure to both hazards.
e. Night formation is really an endless series of near misses in equilibrium with each other.
f. You would have to pay a lot of money at a lot of amusement parks and perhaps add a few drugs, to get the same blend of psychedelic sensations as a single night weather flight on the wing.

19. One of the most important skills to develop is the skill to ignore those things that were designed by non-pilots to get the pilot's attention.

20. At the end of the day, the controllers, ops supervisors, maintenance guys, weather guessers, and birds; they're all trying to kill you and your job is to not let them!

21. The concept of "controlling" airspace with radar is just a form of FAA sarcasm directed at fighter pilots to see if they're gullible enough to swallow it. To put it another way, when is the last time the FAA ever shot anyone down?

22. Remember that the radio is only an electronic suggestion box for the pilot. Sometimes the only way to clear up a problem is to turn it off.

23. It is a tacit, yet profound admission of the pre-eminence of flying in the hierarchy of the human spirit, that those who seek to control aviators via threats always threaten to take one's wings and not one's life.

24. Remember when flying low and inverted the rudder still works the same way but hopefully your IP never taught you "Pull stick Back, Plane go Up."

25. Mastering the prohibited maneuvers in the dash-10 is one of the best forms of aviation life insurance you can get.

26. A tactic done twice becomes a procedure. (Refer to unpredictability discussion above)

27. The aircraft G-limits are only there in case there is another flight planned for that particular airplane. If subsequent flights do not appear likely, there are no G-limits.

28. One of the beautiful things about a single piloted aircraft is the quality of the social experience.

29. If a mother has the slightest suspicion that her infant might grow up to be a pilot, she had better teach him to put things back where he got them.

30. The ultimate responsibility of the pilot is to fulfill the dreams of the countless millions of earthbound ancestors who could only stare skyward and wish.

We fly, we cry, we belong to the sky, a world without bounds, a world so beautiful and yet so fragile but just a whisper away

Best to remember though we are all apprentices in a craft where no one ever becomes a master

NZScion
13th Apr 2009, 04:32
20. At the end of the day, the controllers, ops supervisors, maintenance guys, weather guessers, and birds; they're all trying to kill you and your job is to not let them!

Heard this from an ATCO once:

"If a pilot makes a mistake, the pilot dies. If a controller makes a mistake, the pilot still dies"

Fark'n'ell
13th Apr 2009, 08:23
Gooneyone
Maintain thy altitude, lest the earth arise and smitheth thee
To quote original saying which I first heard forty odd years ago when I was skydiving

"Do not take thine altitude in vain
Lest Mother earth rise and smite thee"

Another saying was

Blessed are those who delay too long
For theirs shall be a lasting impression

Jucky
14th Apr 2009, 12:16
Only bats and tw:mad:ts night fly!

Firestorm
14th Apr 2009, 20:15
The most useless things in flying are altitude above you, runway behind you and fuel in the bowser, and a promise from management :ok:

If we got paid as much as our brothers and sisters think we do, had as much time off as our neighbours think we do, and got as much down route sex as our wives accuse us of we'd be very VERY happy pilots!

Hobo
14th Apr 2009, 20:52
Always prewarm the pan, put a small amount of olive oil in, turn the heat up slowly but do not allow the oil to smoke and then place the food carefully in the pan until cooked, turning as necessary.


What? ........ Flying Rules? I thought you said Frying Rules.

galaxy flyer
14th Apr 2009, 21:41
We would, indeed, Mr Firestorm

GF

radeng
14th Apr 2009, 22:28
Firestorm,

management promises are generally worth just as much outside the aviation world as they are in it. That is, b***er all.

AcroChik
14th Apr 2009, 22:39
"... had as much time off as our neighbours think we do..."

Never heard of a furlough?

If case you haven't, that's the period of time during which young, short-time FOs get to face pizza delivery hiring boards.

Firestorm
15th Apr 2009, 09:12
Hobo: always pre-warm the pan for the Captain and the Number One.... especially before a number 2) :ok: :eek:

Aerochick: I know exactly what you mean: I'm up for one soon!

radeng: I thought so: might as well stay in aviation then! :ugh:

BuzzLightyears
24th Apr 2009, 18:01
Flying is falling with style!:)

ChristiaanJ
24th Apr 2009, 18:23
If you can keep your head when all those about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you....
Better climb out of that hover damn quick!

alwayslookingup
25th Apr 2009, 05:39
If you're going to make a mistake, make sure it's the first time that mistake has ever been made (applies equally through all of life, I guess).

RJM
25th Apr 2009, 11:46
Oswald Boelcke's 8 Rules of Aerial Combat date from WWI but actually are ideal (when paraphrased to suit the venture) for any enterprise where a bit of calculating vigilance is required. I found them useful when I was selling real estate. As a PPL of limited experience, I have refined them to: 'Make sure you stay alive.'

1. Secure as many advantages for yourself as possible before entering a fight.
2. Be decisive. If you start an attack, carry it through to its conclusion.
3. Firing at long range at indistinct targets wastes ammunition and effort; fire a well-aimed burst from close range.
4. Be ever on the alert for ruses; keep your eyes constantly on your opponent.
5. The best method of attack is a diving approach from behind.
6. If attacked by a diving opponent, do not try to dive away or engage in unnecessary and useless aerobatics such as looping or rolling; turn into the attacker, and keep turning, being careful not to lose height during the turns relative to the attacker, and try to close on the attacker's tail.
7. Never forget the line of retreat, especially if over enemy territory.
8. Attack as a team, taking care that several do not dive after one opponent.

boredcounter
26th Apr 2009, 01:57
Rule 1: You have many lives in your hands, don't let them down.
Rule 2: Some have your life in thier hands, don't let them down.
Rule 3: Your life is as good as the last great roster or favour done.
Rule 4: If you do not understand rule 2 and 3, rule 1 is all that applies.

shaky
26th Apr 2009, 02:37
Rule 1: the aircraftyou fly was supplied by the lowest bidder.

ArthurR
26th Apr 2009, 10:42
Their are more aircraft in the sea, than submarines in the air.