View Full Version : Holiday in Britain "bog off!"

10th Apr 2009, 19:03
The media are today suggesting we should all go on a caravan holiday in rip off Britain. Mainly because its supposidly cheaper. Well after last years soaking I say bog off, to be polite that is.

Along with the soakings, even in the worst seaside towns you have to pay to park and pee.

I was going to write a big list but the thought has put me off!

Beatriz Fontana
10th Apr 2009, 19:19
Ah, come on, that's harsh. This year my three week summer leave is going to be in North Yorkshire, Cumbria and West Scotland. Going to be absolutely gorgeous even if it hoicks it down.

I get bored of sitting on beaches getting sunburnt (which is bad for you anyway). Why not pack a bag, get in the car and go somewhere in the UK? There are some fantastic places in the UK (some absolute carp, too, but just don't go there).

Beat the traffic by travelling early or late or avoiding the school hols altogether. Park outside of town centres and walk in to beat the fees. And go to the pub, have a pint and pee there...!

And if it's raining, come on, it's only rain. Go watch a film.

Captain Stable
10th Apr 2009, 19:35
Well, apparently Silvio Berlusconi has told those living under canvas having lost their entire lives in the earthquake that struck L'Aquila to think of themselves as being "on a camping holiday". :rolleyes:

That'll be lovely, then. Perhaps a little sightseeing today, children. Look - that rubble is where we used to live. :(

10th Apr 2009, 19:48
I would rather stay at home than holiday in rip off Britain. I agree with N707ZS. Add all the badly behaved noisy brats. No way. I don't go on holiday to search for Pubs for a free pee or to watch films.

10th Apr 2009, 20:02
I can jump into my luxury Mercedes motorcaravan and go anywhere in the country. There doesn't have to be noisy brats, there doesn't have to be crowds of grockles, there doesn't have to be rip-off prices. There really are some fabulous areas of this country with many interesting things to do.

But, if you prefer a lie-on-the-beach-and-read-a-book type holiday, then maybe the British Isles isn't for you.



10th Apr 2009, 20:07
Hols in UK are OK in small doses. About 15 mins usually does me.

Standard Noise
10th Apr 2009, 21:03
my luxury Mercedes motorcaravan

Blimey, bit posh for a rusty Sprinter with a Li-lo in the back!:}

I'll be happy with me book and Iprod on a beach in Mah-jorca with guaranteed sunshine and a bottle or 6 of Sammy Magill!

22 Degree Halo
10th Apr 2009, 22:13
I'll be holidaying again this year in native Scotland...trouble is, it's full of English la-de-dah's at the same time :ugh:

Still, they bring good revenue even if their cash notes are not legal tender:p

10th Apr 2009, 23:19
Well, I'm off first thing tomorrow in my trusty VW Camper with a brace of freshly fettled XC mountain bikes, I'll rustle up bacon & eggs with coffee somewhere near Aviemore, ride over the Ryovan Pass and down to Loch Morlich, and back in a loop, then when I get back to the van, get the sea bass on the fire, and pull the cork off a nice white that has been chilling in the fridge. Watch the sun go down, and then settle in with a paperback. And be glad the midges aren't out yet...... I probably won't see another soul.
Sunday, we'll just go wherever we feel.

11th Apr 2009, 00:08
Must disagree with the OP :yuk:. I've been to Abroad and it wasn't great. Britain has more scenic beauty, history, grand architecture and real ale pubs than anywhere else in the world. Sometimes it has sunshine. I've been exploring it for twenty years and if I can keep going another twenty I won't see the half of it. Those that don't like it here - bog off.:)

11th Apr 2009, 00:43
Back when I flew gliders, a few moons ago, I saw the deck from cloudbase frequently. The alps, the Himilaya, the Atlas Mountains, Mount Olympus, various other spots in Europe. Nothing stirred the soul like the patchwork quilt above Yorkshire, Dorset, Sussex, Northumbria, Derbyshire etc. etc.

11th Apr 2009, 07:32
One returns to the UK for a couple of weeks every year and stays in the pad in Brighton. Main reason is to see aged parents, sisters and assorted family members. A trip to down, dinner and a show. Take the kids to Drusilla's. Boules, a pint or 3 with old school friends an The Cricketers.

It's a good place for a holiday.

Wouldn't want to live there tho.:}

11th Apr 2009, 07:43
Go where you want to, simple is it not? every country has it's pro's and con's.

11th Apr 2009, 07:46
I can jump into my luxury Mercedes motorcaravan and go anywhere in the country.

But try and stop anywhere, particularly overnight, and you get moved on by jobsworths. It's OK if you want to stay in country caravan parks (surrounded by screaming families) but no good for visiting towns and enjoying the local hospitality.

There's no secret why people holiday abroad - English towns don't want them. I've given up trying to visit towns I don't know and work out
a) if they have anything I want to see/do (looking from the ring road or bypass)
b) where to park so that I can see/do/shop
c) if I have enough cash for the parking meter (not knowing how long I will be staying.
If they don't want me to visit, I can happily oblige!

11th Apr 2009, 12:03
I'm having trouble understanding how, suddenly, and just whilst the recession is in full swing, and the pound worth bu**er all it becomes economical to buy and tow a caravan around the UK.

The van must cost, and it must surely raise the towing vehicle's fuel burn. As soon as the economy recovers the urge to travel will return and you're left with the van ,either to rust or to sell on, having depreciated!!

The UK is a great place with plenty of countryside to visit, walk in and generally enjoy. The main seaside resorts are a bit naff, and the weather is hardly what you would call dependable though - and as has been said previously the rip-off which is parking, meals out, entry to attractions and the like hardly make the add ons any cheaper than much of euroland, even at around € 1.00 = £ 1.00!!

If there really is this trend towards caravanning, I guess we can all look to a summer of hell, overtaking swaying vans, hauled by drivers with no training in handling an articulated vehicle, nor for that matter loading it correctly. Great joy!!

As you might have gathered I hate the things - but I suppose, like Marmite, you either love 'em or you hate 'em.

Flap 5
11th Apr 2009, 13:01
The problem with Britain is the high cost of entry to attractions, many of which are distinctly average. Even with the value of the pound the cost of attractions in europe is often still better value. If you go further away to asia or the USA you usually get better service for your money aswell.

11th Apr 2009, 13:29
I've never been caravan touring in my life so there's proof that you don't need one to do it, if you like. We've always hired either country cottages or boats. As for cost of attractions - there are thousands that are free. Granted when our kids were younger they wanted Alton Towers et al but it was worth the cost and was no hassle.

Our family has had huge fun on our English holidays - perhaps we're just too easy to please. :rolleyes:

Ten West
11th Apr 2009, 14:34
I love my regular visits back up North to see my folks. They live in Tynemouth and Whitley bay.

The North East has some great beaches, historic sites, friendly people and a fantastic city centre in the shape of Newcastle.

I'd like to live back up that way sometime. :ok:

Devon and Cornwall are great as well. Personally I like the waters around Southampton for playing with boats too. Once my little boat's restoration is finished I intend to spend many a day off popping over to the Isle of Wight for lunch and a blast around the Needles. :cool:

11th Apr 2009, 14:46
Used to work and live in Holland. Too bl**dy flat!!!

Used to live near Manchester. Left to join RAF.
Only been back for the usual Hatch, Match & Dispatch visits.
And to enjoy the views of the Pennines.
Can it be arranged to move the Pennines to South London.
Be a Major improvement to the present MESS.
Just North of the M 25 would do. Thank you.

11th Apr 2009, 14:57
Caravans are overpriced tat and should be banned in favour of motorhomes.

Pikey copycats pay £thousands to buy these fragile trailers with basic amenities which will disintergrate with the slightest fart, inside or out. They then spend equal amounts of cash towing them around the country twice a year holding up the traffic.
If caravans were banned, (the Isle of Man and the Channel Islands have the right idea), motorhomes, which are far more practical, use less road space and infinately better equipped, would come down in price enabling everyone to enjoy a better quality of tme away, more often and with less hassle to others.

11th Apr 2009, 14:58
Cowes week can be very MOOOOOving.
Sorry goatface. Banning the mobile obstructions would only
serve the purpose of RAISING the price of the self-propelled
version. Which are already far too expensive.

You don't happen to sell them do you???

11th Apr 2009, 15:23
No, but I assumed that if there were no caravans (my panacea) there would be more demand for reasonably priced motorhomes and in the long term that would definately be the case.
I know a lot of caravaners and an equal number of motorhome owners, all of roughly equal financial status/means, there's no doubt whatsoever that the motorhome society get much better value out of their vehicles than the caravan owning folk do.

Besides which, anything that causes inconvenience and misfortune to Pikeys, suits me.

11th Apr 2009, 15:30
Oh, we've moved on, I like Pikeys, preferably baked in the oven
and smothered in a nice white sauce. Mmmmm Delicious!!

11th Apr 2009, 15:38
The things people do to avoid paying for the Ferry, Eh???

11th Apr 2009, 16:00
Fast Caravan!

Fast caravan 3 - BBC Top Gear (http://www.topgear.com/au/videos/fast-caravan-part-3)

11th Apr 2009, 16:06
Very nice pub, W's Anchor?

west lakes
11th Apr 2009, 16:09
The Crab & Lobster at Bembridge is better, comes complete with Wokka's low flying as well!:ok:

Of course the Lake District is great all year:cool:

(oops I live there so maybe I'm a bit biased)

Ten West
11th Apr 2009, 16:20
You just need a little powerboat. Under the Itchen Bridge, turn left out into the Solent, then full throttle. IOW in 10 mins.* :ok:

*You'll feel like you've gone a few rounds with Mike Tyson afterwards though. 20 minutes is a lot less violent!

11th Apr 2009, 16:35
Used to SAIL it from Northney Marina. 3 to 4 hrs, depending on wind!!

11th Apr 2009, 16:47
Re: Motorhomes

enabling everyone to enjoy a better quality of tme away, more often and with less hassle to others.

Except every time you drive to the pub you have to wash and dry the pots and pans and put them away first and then take up half the bleedin' pub carpark when you get there. :ugh:

The muppet of a bloke next to me on our cul-de-sac has bought one longer than his house frontage. He has to three point turn it in the road to get in or out. Almost every time he drives it he reverses into something solid - including my garden wall and the one over the road, which he still hasn't fixed after knocking both out of line.

11th Apr 2009, 16:53
Oh dear, hit a sore point there then?

11th Apr 2009, 17:04
ShyTorque - Maybe you should recommend the benefits of a holiday in Benidoom, eh?

I would never recomend a holiday to a place I have never been to and have no intention of visiting.

It's probably full of Bennies anyway...... :hmm:

Unless of course you mean recommend it to my neighbour, in which case good idea. Unfortunately, this chap uses the mobile home as his daily transport, I kid you not. Watch out Aldi and Netto shoppers, here he comes again - CRUNCH!

11th Apr 2009, 17:14
Except every time you drive to the pub you have to wash and dry the pots and pans and put them away first and then take up half the bleedin' pub carpark when you get there.
Er... don't you wash up and put things away anyway?? And pubs are for walking or cycling to :ok:



11th Apr 2009, 21:13
I know that.... and I do more than my fair share of washing up.

What I meant was that a caravan is unhitched and left at the destination site whereupon the owner becomes a mere motorist and causes no further undue road chaos, rather than the driver of a juggernaut.

11th Apr 2009, 21:14
You can go somewhere warm, with no chance of rain for £300 per person all inclusive for a week. That's flights, accommodation, food, drink and entertainment. There's nothing like that here.

Of course for that price you may find the hotel full of chavs but you get them at home too.

If you want to go somewhere a bit more exclusive it won't cost you a lot more. You go to a decent hotel in the UK and you have to take out a second mortgage to stay there.

11th Apr 2009, 22:05
A juggernaut? It's an ambulan ...sorry, luxury Mercedes motorcaravan :} 20ft long but it can turn on a sixpence. Perhaps your neighbour might like a lesson in parking. I only take up one and half space in Tesco. :ok:



12th Apr 2009, 00:20
I wasn't actually referring to your "tiny little" amblimance, Whirls. I'm just a bit fed up of my neighbour's monstrosity - it's so big I've spotted it on Google Earth!

P.s. Does yours still have the kit to get a man's heart going? ;)

12th Apr 2009, 00:30
She keeps that in her car, does she? :} A woman of endless surprises! :p ;)

12th Apr 2009, 01:11
I'll bet she's got a nurse's outfit, too. :)

12th Apr 2009, 01:20
Aaaah.... My hero! :ok: :p

green granite
12th Apr 2009, 07:48
If you don't like the noise of screaming kids then don't holiday during school holiday times, unless of course you have kids that are adding to the noise. I go in June, it's quiet, the weather's usually reasonable and the prices are cheaper. I just can't be arsed to go abroad nowadays.

12th Apr 2009, 08:03
Except every time you drive to the pub you have to wash and dry the pots and pans and put them away first and then take up half the bleedin' pub carpark when you get there.

You're doing it wrong.......

Either hang a motorcycle on the back to do the shopping/get to the pub or speak to the landlord and make an arrangement - "If we buy dinner and drink your fine wine/ale this evening, can we park overnight in your car park?"

Works surprising well.

12th Apr 2009, 08:19

Towed by:


12th Apr 2009, 10:05
You're doing it wrong.......
Either hang a motorcycle on the back to do the shopping/get to the pub or speak to the landlord and make an arrangement - "If we buy dinner and drink your fine wine/ale this evening, can we park overnight in your car park?"
Works surprising well.

But I'm not doing it at all, that's my point. :ugh:
Why does a single bloke (such as my neighbour is) want to use a vehicle that's longer than the frontage of his house as daily transport? Life was much easier for everyone on the street (and my garden wall remained intact) when he drove a Honda Accord every day.

12th Apr 2009, 13:10
Maybe he has it for the same reason I had mine all those years ago?

I'm sure I had more nooky in there than I ever have anywhere else.

12th Apr 2009, 17:26
Paddy and Max!?

12th Apr 2009, 18:57
Ahhhh, memories of 1990 when I was in St Ives with a friend.

She decided she wanted/desperately needed a drink because it was "so hot" and she didn't want to go into a pub.

So we ended up in this little cafe type place; she ordered a glass of
Coke..............I watched in disbelief as the owner of the establishment
brazenly opened a can of Panda Coke (it was about 5p a can in those days), poured ***half of it*** into a small glass and presented a bill for £0.75.

Now I appreciate the Cornish are a crooked bunch, particularly in the
resorts..........and I appreciate the cafe owner had to refrigerate the can
and wash the glass up, but a 3000% markup on a non-perishable item?

13th Apr 2009, 21:51
You can swan off. WE are keeping our hills HERE....:=
You are more than welcome to visit...., but you ain't having them

Krystal n chips
14th Apr 2009, 07:30
Lets suppose you are either (a) a visitor to the UK / (b) on a budget / (c) just travelling around or all of these and you want to grab a few hours sleep....like those large matrix signs frequently inform us to do and about not driving when tired.....and lets suppose you are on the A14 near Cambridge and decide to stop at the services as I did on Saturday for about 45mins en route to Suffolk.

Large sign in the car park says £20 per car for longer than 2hrs...£15 for caravans and HGV's. Now for the HGV's this I can understand......but not for a caravan and another £5 for a car ??.

Hardly conducive to a rest or the wallet is it....and whilst the UK has a lot to offer, it's concepts like this that prove detrimental to holidaying here.......and the :mad: weather !.

14th Apr 2009, 16:20
As a UK native I used to be in the gtf out of the UK for holidays club. However with young children we have discovered the beauty and diversity of our homeland. It helps that FiL lives in the Lake District and MiL lives in Poole!

Thinking about investing in a motorhome to allow simple exploring of our near nieghbours so the kids grow up to be good "yurpeans".


14th Apr 2009, 16:45
If you want to see the best of Britain, buy a hang glider. You will by definition spend your free time above the most beautiful parts of the land. Mam Tor, Devils Dyke, Beacy Head, The Blorenge, Nont Sarahs, Moel Accre, I could go on...

14th Apr 2009, 20:26
Just come back from a day in the motorhome on Bodmin Moor. Parked up in a small track near Warleggan not a soul in sight. Wild flowers everywhere, sheep and ponies wandering around and just a babbling stream the only sound. Could have stayed there a fortnight and no one would have known or said a word.

Couple of years ago spent three weeks touring Scotland, Wester Ross unbelievably beautiful, parked by lochs, on the sea shore and only stayed on site twice to charge the batteries. Every other night was free and in some beautiful spot never bothered by anyone.

I love my motorhome......... mind you the holidays in Canada, Barbados and Antigua were pretty damned good too!

14th Apr 2009, 20:33
canals are nice, but you need to go either in spring or after the school holidays finish. Watch out for trendy canalside pubs - we got turned out of one for playing dominoes!

In an old fashioned ral ale pub near Keighley, two old Yorkshire men looked at us playing with nine spot dominoes. A comment heard was 'Eh, them young lads ' (the youngest was 37!) ' are using them theer Manchester dominoes'.

The measured response from the other 'There's nowt good come from over that way! Shouldn't be allowed'.

Ace Rimmer
15th Apr 2009, 09:11
Yep Canal boating one of the most relaxing of holidays - navigation? simple keep it between that bank and that bank - the biggest decisions of the day? Which pub are we going to stop for lunch and which one will it be for supper?

Uncle Rimmer had one up on the Coventry canal at Hopwas afore he went to the cut in the sky and Mrs R and I borrowed it a couple of times it was great...

15th Apr 2009, 10:02
Well I am posting this from the sitting room of my caravan in North Wales. Took the kids and the dog to Llandudno and Betwys-Y-Coed. The dog was welcomed just about everywhere. We did not pay for parking because we were just a little bit patient and did not try to park right on the seafront. Had a great time I must say. Today it is a bit rainy so the wife is doing some crafting with the kids and I am playing on the net and reading a book. Supposed to clear up a bit later today so we will see what the afternoon brings. A holiday is what you make of it, not just where you are.

15th Apr 2009, 11:45
Yep Canal boating one of the most relaxing of holidays. What about the locks. Going up a staircase of a dozen locks must be a full physical work out!

I can see the other good side though.

Ace Rimmer
15th Apr 2009, 15:03
Er that's what Mrs R is for!
I told her my job is driving your job is locks...mind you she always was a fitty...

Did the Foxton flight and the Watford staircase nae bother...

15th Apr 2009, 15:49
Let's face it, most people get around 20 odd days holiday a year (let's not a have a dick measuring contest if you only get 19 or if you are lucky enough to get 25 plus).

Me, I am a sun worshipper, I like to lay on a sun lounger going pink and then a lovely shade of rusty brown. I like to swim in a clear sea and relax on a clean beach and have a nice cafe not too far away for me to get me and Mrs Elpus copious supplies of drinks throughout the day.

Now, if you can guarentee me 14 consecutive days of unbridled sunshine in the UK I might, and it's a big I might, consider holidaying in the UK. My holidays are precious to me and I like to spend them the way I want to, not dodging rain showers and going shopping cos there's nothing else to do.

15th Apr 2009, 15:59
A good flight of locks before breakfast is the way to get up an appetite for one of radeng's canal breakfasts. Orange juice, choice of cereal or porridge, bacon (3 rashers of smoked back) fried eggs (2), mushrooms (fried, 6 each if small), sausage (grilled, 2), grilled tomato, grilled black pudding, fried bread.
Tea or coffee, brown or white toast with choice of marmite, marmalade, Gentlemen's Relish.

radeng then drives while the rest of the crew wash up!

Sadly, these days, my appetite is such that one shredded wheat is enough for me for the day.

Romeo Oscar Golf
15th Apr 2009, 16:04

Home in UK is a holiday. I can travel in any direction and the scenery is trully spectacular.... and if I'm lucky and travel far enough I might find the sun.:)