Dining In Night Pranks

[dropintheoggin]

I've been to a recent ATC ball and there were a few below average attempts at some japers. I'm due at another ball next week..... Could I get some good ideas please?.....

[Seldomfitforpurpose]

I have always found that acting like a grown up, being an individual and not following the pack has worked well for me, but hey you go with what ever works for you..............or maybe if you want to play pranks you could, as many who have gone before you have, devise one of you own.............bah bah bah....:rolleyes:

[Willi B]

So that your readership can see how high (or low) the bar is, perhaps you could elaborate on what you mean by: below average attempts at some japers.

[AdanaKebab]

Burn the Mess Piano .. (best bet is to buy an old second hand one just for the purpose)...beware helf and safetee/fire crew wrath
Food colouring in the white wine glasses.
Talc in the napkins.
PMC and Vice's chairs tied together with rope.
My favourite .. Crawl out to the kitchen, get changed into mess staff uniform and serve the PMC his dinner!!! The Stn Cdr's never notice!:D

[BEagle]

A piglet released into the room as the speeches start........

[FantomZorbin]

BEagle ... were you at Sopley then? I heard that the pig was MUCH more frightened than the audience! Cheque books at the ready, form an orderly queue!

[BEagle]

Nope. It was shortly after I finished the F4 OCU at Coningsby that 29(F) Sqn released a piglet into a Dining-In Night when the OCU boss was being dined out.

B*st*rd Bill tried to ban any mention of it afterwards, so it became known as the 'Pink Rabbit' incident and the tale spread rapidly throughout the RAF!

This old PPRuNe thread has some references to Dining-In Night 'activities':

http://www.pprune.org/military-aircrew/48124-1-gp-dining-night-waddington.html

[27mm]

Buy a remote control toy tank; many moons ago, at a dining-in night, the Staish (a muchly unpopular figure) was wading through his interminable speech, when from the area of Mr Vice a whirring and clanking sound was heard, as the tank slowly wended its way carefully up the table. The Staish observed the tank, but personal pride forced him to speak ever louder as the tank closed in range, until at last it stood before him. As the tank cannon raised and took aim, the Staish could no longer contain himself and snatched it from the table, throwing it onto the floor - but of course by then, the point had been made....

[racedo]

Of a similar vein to 27mm there is a small speaker that an be strategically placed and activated by a key fob that screams "Bull****" or "Bull**** detector activated"

Bull**** Detector (http://www.thecryptmag.com/Online/29/Bull****Detector.html)

Edited because Found the one I was thinking of

[Pontius Navigator]

Was 67Wing with his Q about dining-in nights genuine or did Pop just catch a crab:}

[Double Zero]

I have a radio controlled Abrahms tank, with non-harmfull gun, free to any Harrier Squadron; on the other hand, how about the old one of capturing a rival squadron's mascot and rendering it green with food dye ?

[Roobarb]

Beags, I believe the piglet should be greased.

You could always try the thunderflash in the top table flowers after the loyal toast.

http://www.rivierepublishing.com/images/properties/roobarb.jpg

I’ll take on the opposition anyday. It’s my management I can’t beat!

[BEagle]

Thunderflash in the flowers......

That happened at an infamous 'Boulmer sector conference' air defenders' dinner at Leeming some years ago. Lightning mates expected a shower of earth and flowers, but instead there was a muffled 'thoomp' and instead of the flowers going up, the copper vase in which they were sitting went down.

With some force. Unfortunately the vase was on an antique occasional table, which then collapsed neatly split in half as though it had been clobbered with a sledgehammer. Cost us all a fair few bob afterwards - as did the cost of cleaning all the candlegrease off the tables. The WIWOLs had used the 'match on top of the candle' trick and molten grease had flowed merrily across the tables.

But it was all worth it - a great night indeed!!

[short&shapeless]

Sorry not quite what the author wanted but this is something that made I larf then and still does now when I have cause to reflect on those hazy days from my past!

Gutersloh - 230 just come home from Hot and Sandy Part 1 and at the first D-In night since their return.

Speeches start when at one end of the long top table a remote control car under the control of a 230 pilot starts on its way down the table negotiating the various candelabra and Mess Silver ‘heirlooms’. As a result of some very skilful driving the car completes its trek down the table and is duly sacrificed as it is launched off the table into the nearest wall where it immediately detonated into many small pieces.

Cue much cheering and applause, speeches cut short and an early retirement to the bar ensued

Fast forward to the next D-In night when the start of the first speech is punctuated by the mighty roar of a ‘remote control’ Hovercraft which, following in the wheel tracks of its much smaller predecessor, starts to ‘amble’ down the top table.

Now the plan was obviously to imitate the epic journey of the month before but the flaw in the plan, already obvious to many there, suddenly dawned on the doughty Rockape driver as he tried to manoeuvre around the first candelabra. Despite him frantically working the steering toggle both left and right the craft remained steadfastly on course maintaining a ‘bee line’ right down the centre of the long top table.

Realising the futility of the situation our intrepid driver cut his losses and all power to the mighty beast in order to minimise the damage to the mess silver and his ego. Some occupants were quicker than others to rescue the valuables in front of them but if my memory serves me right it took out at least 4 or 5 silver ‘place settings’ before it eventually ground to a halt, let out a huge, deflatory sigh and then settled gently on its air skirt somewhere close to the Stn Cdr.

Curiously that did not bring the speeches to an early close but it did earn the driver a wee chat with said Staish on Monday morning on that little piece of carpet reserved for those special people that got to go and see him AND got to keep their hat on

[chiglet]

PMC and Vice's chairs tied together with rope.


In my DINs that would have been one heck of a long bit of string...

[BEagle]

Ones I've heard of, but haven't personally seen:

1. A skillfully placed screenwash nozzle, length of tubing, reservoir and pump under the top table, with the switch somewhere down at the shags' end. In the middle of the Stn Cdr's speech, the switch is operated and a rapidly growing damp patch appears on the Stn Cdr's trousers.

2. Various harcore porn photos fabloned firmly to the table underneath the top tables' place mates. When the mess staff clear them off just before the loyal toast, all is revealed....

3. An MS26 dinghy in its valise under the top table - and a suitable length of cord from the operating handle to the shags' end. One firm tug, a loud pop and hiss, then utter chaos.

[1.3VStall]

When we dined out the Buccaneer OCU from Honington as they moved up to Jockanory land in the mid 80s someone had made a magnificent model of a Bucc and mounted it on the dining room wall above Mr Vice's head. It was even equipped with four Martels. IIRR the modeller's surname was the same as a Roman road that runs North out of London.

After the loyal toast, and as we all sat down, one of the Martels started to whine. It then launched from under the wing and proceeded unerringly across the room where it exploded against the wall adjacent to one of the doors into the kitchen. Yes - exploded! The ruddy thing had a warhead as the damage to the dining room wall testified.

This marked the start of an evening of pyrotechics in the bar - much to the chagrin of the newly arrived (small and folliclly challenged) staish!

[Hot 'n' High]

BEagle, the picture I have in mind of the dinghy is priceless! :ok:

I do recall one Padre deciding he would become involved in the “high jinx” one DIN but, prudently, he decided to take things easy on his first foray – just a small “pop” from a waste bin near the entrance to the Dining Hall would do the Bish. As things kicked off, firing trigger was retrieved, MASS set to “Fire” and tit pushed. Either through being a Devil in disguise, or him being stitched up by the lads down the Armoury :}, the ensuing thermonuclear detonation rendered an eerie silence of awe across the diners, apart from a strange ringing sound in the ears, and a mushroom cloud which completely blocked the double doorway from view.

The smoke started to clear – rather more quickly than one would have expected. The reason soon became clear as one of the large Oak doors leading out of the Dining Hall slowly appeared out the fog, canted at 60 degrees to the horizontal – but still gently rocking on its middle hinge! As the scene slowly sunk in (just about everyone being aware as to who was behind that particular virgin “bang”), some wag broke the silence when, in a perfect Michael Cain voice, shouted “Oi, Bish, you weren’t supposed to blow the bl**dy doors off!”. Ah, them were the days!!!!

[newt]

After dinner when all assembled in the ante-room, lock all the doors and drop a red smoke flare down the chimney! Lots of pink shirts in the morning!

Clingfilm over the ladies loos!! Makes for some very expensive dry cleaning bills and lots of flowers!

Bum prints on the ante-room ceiling! All goes well until WRAF officer decides boob prints are better! OC WRAF has complete sense of humour failure!

Station Commanders donkey in the bar!

OC Ops mini set on 4 G-plan coffee tables in the Mess hallway! He drives it out damaging the front doors and the stone steps! Guess who gets the bill!!

Motorbike racing down the main corridor! But do try and stop before wrecking the door at the far end! Could also try riding motorbike into the bar and up a plank to jump it into the garden! Do remember to check how far the window opens and how much space the bike plus rider needs to pass through on this daring journey! Otherwise bike in the garden and rider on his back in the bar with very bad headache!

Threaten to burn the Mess piano in the bar! OC plod goes mad and arrests all involved! A night in the guardroom to think up a good story for the Boss!

Two gallons of Teepol in the Mess pond to make the fountain all frothy! Next morning find PMC trying to save hundreds of prize carp who are by now swimming upside down! VERY expensive bill shared by all!

Advise against all of the above! Have 2 beers and go home! You might get nagged to death but its much cheaper in the long run!!