View Full Version : An unofficial broadcast by HM the Queen Elizabeth II...

21st Jan 2009, 20:14
"My Lords and Members of the House of Commons, other distinguished landlords, commercants and mere peasants of the UK and colonies:

It has been brought to my attention that, 'some of those who should know better' (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/politics/7842402.stm), have recently attempted to take advantage of existing measures designed to guarantee the vital interests of the Kingdom, for their own personal advantage.

Whilst the immediate danger may have passed, let it be known throughout this Kingdom and the Colonies, that the custodians at the Tower of London have been advised to be ready to accommodate any and all those who transgress and/or use/abuse their prerogatives for personal gain in the name of the Realm."

"Crow, crow" replied the uhmmm, crows at the Tower of London...?! :rolleyes:

21st Jan 2009, 22:33
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall.
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the king's horses and all the king's men
Couldn't put Humpty together again.

And in view of the 100s of thousands who've already lost thier jobs (or are in danger of losing theirs), HM the Queen forlornly awaited a contribution, or at least a criticism of her previous post. "Hmmmm, with a long sigh", she thought, "perhaps the populace are indeed more fearfull of Gordon Brown and what he chooses to provide. But if or when the worst comes to pass, I'll still accept wheat and barley in lieu of income taxes. God bless you...!"

PS. Have all my subjects completely lost their minds?! ;)

21st Jan 2009, 22:41
Ravens actually.....caw...caw

Put a few heads on pikes. That will focus a few minds.

21st Jan 2009, 22:44
If you put a head on a pike, does it become a perch?

21st Jan 2009, 23:16
Can a pole perch on a rod?

Paradise Lost
21st Jan 2009, 23:25
Oh! Cod we're back on pollacks again.......

22nd Jan 2009, 00:16
Stop it. You're doing this on porpoise. This thread mentioned ravens not fish so stick to the subject oriole cry.

Someone else's tern now ...

22nd Jan 2009, 00:28


sorry, on a bit of an art deco thing at the mo'.

Old 'Un
22nd Jan 2009, 00:55

Once bittern...

(Ducks for cover) :O

Le Vieux

Captain Stable
22nd Jan 2009, 11:12
Toucan play at that game.

22nd Jan 2009, 11:59
Bankers? Robin bustards

Beatriz Fontana
22nd Jan 2009, 14:27
Great tits. And if they swore a lot, they'd be blue tits.

22nd Jan 2009, 14:30
or even shitehawks....

22nd Jan 2009, 22:49
Oh Pollacks! your all Raven mad

Pinky the pilot
23rd Jan 2009, 02:04
This thread is for the birds! :*

23rd Jan 2009, 14:45
Not that anyone important ever peruses these forums...! But considering the responses (any excuse for a fish-joke...) it's hardly any wonder that MPs will one day eventually get their way and exclude their expenses from public scrutiny for good.

From what's already been officially published so far, some MPs are at least a party to condoning irregular, if not actually wholly-ficticious invoices in the hidden, black or otherwise 'untaxed sub-UK economy'. What I'd like to have seen was that the Inland Revenue took an active interest in the past dislosures and examine every invoice / supplier in detail for compliance to normal practices...?! Have not come across any reports on this to date, a (if you don't look, you won't find...) official approach appears to the way things are progressing.

HM Queen Elizabeth II or Heaven help us! Somewhere in the great depths of our monarchial democracy, someone must have utterred: "if the truth be known, t'would be the very end of public order". Hence the extremely ambigious treatment and follow-up of the subject in the media, parliament and the government. Favours being collected, favours being awarded anyone...? :}

All this at a time when MPs of all persuasions have engaged literally 100s of billions of taxpayer funds, basically mortgaging the futures of every UK citizen in order to save a few (formerly) private banks? What do these banks know about MPs and their private banking activities? Why are so many of these banks' directors still paying themselves and their staff inordinate bonuses whilst taking public handouts?

Those may be the real 10,000 taxpayer-funded new kitchen-type questions we should all be asking...?! :eek:

Beatriz Fontana
23rd Jan 2009, 15:45
airship, I'm not important, but I know some people who are... I've linked to them before, and I'll do it again, because when it came to MPs expenses, this lot used their mail out list to flag up the upcoming vote and asked subscribers to lobby their MP. Furthermore, they were prepared to list the voting preference of each MP when it came to the vote itself.

My Society (http://www.mysociety.org/)and, a subsection of theirs, They Work For You (http://www.theyworkforyou.com/) (the latter of which is currently running a "Blimey, looks like the internet won" fluff piece about the expenses.

End of politics, back to fish and bird puns...

Sir George Cayley
23rd Jan 2009, 18:57
All the previous posts appear to contain Engrish words, but in the order presented make not a bleedin' jot of sense:sad:

Am I tick or wot? Innit:yuk:

Sir George Cayley

24th Jan 2009, 12:53
Beatriz, it's only a mynah victory.

The government have merely temporarily put the issue on the back-burner until a more convenient time. When they can expect a swift victory in the House. And the general populace will swallow it all up as usual. The moral lassitude shown by most here however, is enough to drive one cuckoo. At some stage in the future, Gordon Brown will be obliged to describe all detractors for an end to transparency as a nest of evil or summat. Beware of the stool pigeons amongst us. I'm just a lonesome dove.

PS. Sorry for warbling on...

Beatriz Fontana
24th Jan 2009, 20:15
Next election: May 2010.

First signs of the green shoots of economic recovery? Ooh, let's say February 2010, shall we?

We were having a really good rant about all this in the RBL at lunchtime :*