View Full Version : Bank charges - ultimate fee

15th Oct 2008, 12:29
a wealthy friend of mine, worried by the recent downturn/ collapse of the UK high street banks , decided he was unhappy with his £4,000,000 (true figure )in his bank account.

he phoned them up and asked to withdraw it all in CASH ( £4,000,000).

not sure what he was going to do with it, but

yes, it will take 24 hours.

just one problem - to count it, FEE £60,000

yes thats right £60,000!!!!!

not sure what decision he made!!!!!

15th Oct 2008, 13:58
Find a bank/building society that promise not to charge for cash withdrawals if you move to them (shouldn't be a difficult deal to hammer out in the current climate). Then organise a CHAPS/BACS transfer from the bank that wants to rob you of 60k?:ok:

Um... lifting...
15th Oct 2008, 17:53
I can't believe they can't whistle up the rhino in fresh bound bundles of 100s... that would take 400 of said bundles. I'll count those up for a mere tenner each (including airfare and a couple nights in a nice hotel, 'course...):ok:

15th Oct 2008, 19:36
The £60k will cover the time it will take to hold each note up to the light to check it's a legit note.

15th Oct 2008, 19:49
Perhaps they were intending to pay him out in copper coins?

15th Oct 2008, 20:41
I'd count it for £50K

Roger Sofarover
15th Oct 2008, 21:13
How I would love to be in a position right now where i am faced with the same decision making problem!

Tony Hirst
16th Oct 2008, 00:51
just one problem - to count it, FEE £60,000
I think it should be about £16,000 however underhand changes are afoot - Lloyds TSB have suddenly implemented a maximum transfer of £10K between national accounts and £5K to offshore with a seperate transfer fee of £20 for each transaction. I don't know where they get the power to set abitary limits as moving money around was not an issue before.

16th Oct 2008, 06:08
I don't know where they get the power to set abitrary limits as moving money around was not an issue before.

There's the beauty of gold - don't need no permission to come and go as you please, and your heavily-armed bodyguards can do the lifting.

16th Oct 2008, 07:30
Hi Tony,

Think you will find that due to anti money laundering rules you cannot transfer more then 15,000 euros or £10,000.


Howard Hughes
16th Oct 2008, 09:09
Of course you can transfer more, it just gets recorded that's all!

Can't say I would mind suffering such a dilemna...;)

16th Oct 2008, 09:34
HH is right, and he should know!

Any transfer over 10,000 quid has to be notified to the authorities.

Tony Hirst - raises a very interesting question here. This 10 grand limit is bloody outrageous! What's to stop them charging for a 200 quid transfer? Nothing!

I've no doubt this is all covered by the small print 'all transfers subject to prevailing t&cs etc', but this is naughty.

The irony is that people with lots of money with them will go elsewhere because of this penny-pinching attitude.

Tony Hirst
16th Oct 2008, 12:57
Thanks Berliner,

Interesting as I don't recall having any issues previously. I'm not really in the business of transferring that sort of wonga around on a regular basis. However, as I have now gone expat I can with certainty say that the limits on moving money out of the country have reduced very recently.

16th Oct 2008, 13:05
I can remember when there were stringent restrictions on the amount of currency that you could carry with you when leaving the UK (in my case for vacation only). I'm guessing around 1958/60 . . .

16th Oct 2008, 13:24
Exchange controls G-CPTN - I still have my passport from when I was 16 and went on my first ever trip to Spain (1972).

There was a space at the back of passport for sterling amounts taken abroad.

My 34 pounds lasted me a fortnight!

16th Oct 2008, 13:57
Does this mean that when I go to the bank to deposit my 4 million that they will charge me 60000 for counting it!
I'll just leave it under the mattress then:(

Scumbag O'Riley
16th Oct 2008, 16:16
I'd say that's fine. Of course I would also need to count it to make sure they didn't make a mistake, and as my time has to be worth at least twice that of a bank clerk my fee would be £120k. As a gesture of good will I'd take £100k, so just add the net £40k to the pile and have a nice day!

16th Oct 2008, 18:42
Back in the late 70’s my brother started Uni. and thought that, for a bit of a hoot, he would write a cheque for £1M to his pal and would present it at the bank at the same time as his pal presented a cheque for the same amount. The naive belief was that they would both get a bank statement showing them to be millionaires – albeit for a short period. :cool:

Instead of a statement they got a summons from the manager and had to attend an interview where they were each presented with a bill for several thousand pounds “handling fees”. Their jaws hit the floor and they desperately tried to explain what had happened. The manager let them bluster and stew for about 10 minutes before bursting into laughter, ripping up the bills and telling them to “bu99er off”. Lesson learned – it never did show up on their statement :sad: