Req : Beer Calls & Mess Parties

[Kodakman]

I am compiling details of true stories of military "beer calls" and Mess parties that escalated into wild events. This has been prompted by story of the NATO Beer Call presented in Bob Prest's book F-4 Phantom Pilot. Another story concerns the O Club at a US base in Thailand which was almost completely destroyed by a Christmas party that got out of hand, following a B-52 bombing campaign in the Vietnam War. I am interested in such events from any air arm, and any period. You can email me direct at [email protected] or post details here. Best wishes

Bob Archer

[Old Fella]

Good luck Kodakman, but most will have taken their "Amnesia tablets" in the interests of self preservation. Like the three monkeys, "Say nothing, see nothing & hear nothing" should be the motto followed by all. :=

[diginagain]

"What goes on in the Mess, stays in the Mess"

[Champagne Anyone?]

Some how, I dont think you will get anything on this fishing trip. It is the aircrew closed season you know! :=

[BEagle]

Have a look here: http://www.pprune.org/military-aircrew/48124-1-gp-dining-night-waddington.html

Somehow I imagine such things are a rarity these days, with the way contractorisation of messes was going when I left a few years ago...:hmm:

[Fg Off Max Stout]

At a Happy Hour several years ago the bar staff mistakenly provided a pint of beer for my girlfriend instead of the regulation half pint. Oh how we laughed.

All the other stories are classified.

[scarecrow450]

At TTTE the :mad:once got his:mad:stuck in:mad::mad:then drank it in one
while the:mad:wiped his:mad:on the curtains !! We laughed our :mad: off!

Once got called Sir in a families club, I was a SAC at the time! We laughed
at that for at least 7 seconds !

[Tiger_mate]

Nice to see that at least one tradition stands the test of time. See all, hear all, and say F*** all once out of the door. I guess the aircrew fraternity is not biting today, lets hope it stays that way.

Now about the NAAFI bop at Aldergrove...............:mad:


>>>>> http://www.ehangar.com/modules/Forums/images/smiles/nocomment.gif <<<<<

[minigundiplomat]

I can remember a huge piss up in 1997, several people were sooo drunk they voted Nu Labour. Guess that backfired as we re still living with the hangover.

[The Real Slim Shady]

I remember one night in the Bothy at Lossie when we got our wallets out and sent out for brontosaurus and chips.

DB and CB. What a liff.

[ShyTorque]

I was going to recount the tale of the Station Commander's chickens and the tub of Vaseline after the senior officers' sherry party but I seem to have forgotten all about it.

[PICKS135]

Then there was the mass :mad: at Gardemoen, and the :mad::mad:on the camping trip from Rygge. All good fun.

[DBTW]

Those were the days, weren't they?....

[PPRuNeUser0139]

Yeah and the kids of today just won't believe you..


DB & CB.. sigh

[Pontius Navigator]

TRSS,

I remember breakfast there.

Then of course at RAF **********n there was the ***d or **e or the ***t. Seemed a very local custom largely died out except in traditional pubs.

And the receptionist at RAF *****m who became the Barnsley Witch at RAF **********y

[cornish-stormrider]

What about the time we all got blootered and had a game of steal the big bucket of sunshine!!

Has the hoo-hah died down enough for me to sell it on ebay??

To the "gentleman" who started this thread, you may have inocent intentions but this really smells, fishy like, of a scummy journo fishing for stories about how the hardest working man and women in the world let their hair down and unwind.........


one word..........................BEADWINDOW.


As we all know, what happens in the bar/on det etc stays there. No ranks in my bar and I even drank with harry staish who did the same once.

Oh and in case of black omegas the story at the top is a work of fiction, for I am Tom Clancy's illiterate cousin:E

[Wader2]

Then there were the famous beer calls on Guernsey's Own. Well I believe they were famous as we were always f*****g fly and the beer had run out when we got there. Mind you 5 pints never went far.

[side salad]

In the mess once I had two glasses of orange juice for breakfast when the catering budget only allowed for one.

Does that count?

I think you will find this thread is a case of work hard play hard stay silent. :)

[Londoncrab]

Good luck in finding any info. Personally, have attended quite a few of these that have turned into complete epics, but due to the consumption of the regulation (lots) of falling over juice am unable to provide details. Don't even know how I managed to get from one end of the mess to the other!

Just one tip to bear in mind for those that give huge, detailed accounts. If they can recall so much detail and it was an epic, they weren't there!!! :=

[BEagle]

‘Cement Head’ pretty had a evening chalk Hawk red the was riotous Of ploys involving the PMC’s block off with a thunderous Usual he struck it first band and French was to happen plus 3-line whip going off all given intervals under over the Excellent food lavatories Chivenor in the When local brass met balloons which went and a superb who So slow burning cling film fuzes were applauded after every crow scarers number sense of humour failure his colleague’s loved it at regular Mayor of Barnstaple tomfoolery politicians pissed ourselves unlike was to Stn Cdr And the course to each other somewhat a band re-opened when with the loyal toast bollock report was thought they’d surprised the dining-in night who But the remarking we all a local mayors when The guest remarkably quiet applauded would all behave bangers all laughing talked speech no-one gavel the guest But the had he opened by We were gave his the Mayor of Bideford There be NO we and (the staish) most boring at of the dropped such at the next dining-in we and a previous nothing repeat evening that nothing bang So he had been just went with when before the very indeed quite often No either event had been in fact it Nitrogen Tri-iodide 1980 ARSE!!

[Shadwell the old]

Beagle,

I remember that incident. I was also there and your post brought the memories flooding back. Boy did we have a good time.

I also remember drinking in a bar with someone who later became a Station Cammonader (see what the drinking does to you) and AOC. I think it is disgusting that the RAF encourages a drinking culture.

Shadwell

[Pontius Navigator]

If they can recall so much detail and it was an epic, they weren't there!!! :=

May I refer you to serial 5. I have TOTAL recall and in glorious technicolour even to the carnation shield that was not pressed against my legs on the way home and smelt nice.

[davejb]

I once went on detachment and got drunk.
Does that count? Should I flower it up a bit?

[Green Flash]

Does that count? Should I flower it up a bit?

Ohhhh, no. I sounds as though you've been a very bad AOC and flowering it up would just make it worse.


Should I flower it up a bit - that sounds a bit rude! fnarr:}

[SkidMX]

Nobody mention the pig again boys!.... duur too late!

Skid

[ShyTorque]

Beagle, good stories, but best to wait at least for the hangover to begin before typing. :\ Hic....!

[BEagle]

'Pink rabbit', surely, Skid...;) And one gathers that the Beetle tried to ignore it?

Bastard Bill's attempted D-notice ensured that the entire AD force knew all about it though!!

[scarecrow450]

I once poked Sir Glen in the chest, I was very,very drunk and he was a Winco at the time.

Can I sell that to the press ?:eek:

[SkidMX]

Good to see you remember the code BEagle!
Careless talk etc..

The Beetle did ignor it... until it got kicked up the arse & started squeeling!

(think this all got 'trotted out' on a thread a couple years back though)

Skid

[PICKS135]

Kodakman is probably wondering why the hostility.

In evidence I present

NSFW

British Army sex tape surfaces free (http://www.beerandshots.com/british-soldier-sex-tape.php)

NSFW

The stunned informant said: "While our lads in the north are giving their lives, this tiny bunch in the south seem to think it's a party. It came as an utter shock to me because this sort of behaviour is so rare.

"I've never come across debauchery like this in 15 years in the Army."

Such a sheltered life:rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:

[BEagle]

Was it 'Courtney' who 'encouraged' the Pink Rabbit to start moving?

I'm told that it was quite an event.....allegedly!

[Siggie]

Guernsey's Own,
Burning pianos,
Tins of peas,
Jumpers for goal posts?

[ProM]

There are no interesting stories and Captain Blackadder certainly did not eat that delicious plump spotted pigeon

Oh and none of us were there when it didn't happen

[scarecrow450]

Wot Speckled Jim ?

[SkidMX]

BEagle - you are as ever well informed.
He's currently writing his memoirs - you'll be able to read it there!

...Oh, & yes it was Sqn Ldr Trotter who eventually removed the 'pink rabbit' to the bar.

Skid

[rafmatt]

we had a piss up at kinloss once after the fincastle.
That got out of hand but thats already been reported.

[Rigger1]

"I've never come across debauchery like this in 15 years in the Army."

There was once a young Army lady* in the Falklands who was thoroughly videoed from every conceivable angle whilst she was ‘acting as the meat in a squaddie sandwich’ within 24hrs of arriving in theatre.

48hrs after she had arrived every man and his ‘sqn cat’ had seen it.

*I use the term 'lady' loosely, although she was good looking and I’m not talking Falkland standards good looking!

[advocatusDIABOLI]

I remember the time, at a Northern QRA station, where we all went to the Mess at about 7.30pm. It was brilliant, because we all stood around in small groups and quietly chatted till about 8!!! Then we had some food, and afterwards, someone said some mildly funny things!! What a riot. After dinner, we all reassembeld in our little groups and chatted quietly untill the bus took us home at about 11.30pm. Oh, those were the days.

Of course, that kind of night is totally banned now. Progress? I ask you?

Advo

[The Adjutant]

Anybody remember the Toga Party we held at Mt Kent in Dec 1985. We brought most of the WRAFS, WRNS and WRACS from Stanley up by helicopter and they all stayed the night. Lots of grinning mountain men come the morning. So successful we ran a Valentines Day party 6 weeks later much to the annoyance of CBFFI who heard via some idiot girl who sent a "thanks very much" message on BFBS radio. For some reason he didn't like us hijacking the helicopters to act as our bus service for the evening.

[The Real Slim Shady]

Then there was the time when in the Falklands we were so stealthy that the tannoy announcements were in sign language.

I wasn't there, I didn't do it and I absolutely never welcomed the Sherwood Forester's on their first morning with a wake up call of "Timber!!!!"

[Monty77]

Hey Kodak.

Why so quiet?

Is it because you're:
a. Embarrassed because you're from Bury St Edmunds.
b. Scared of all the nasty aircrew, or
c. Embarrassed by the fact that your totally blatant journo fishing trip would make a baby blush. My dog actually laughed at you, and he only speaks Arabic, but international sign language will always work as he cocks a hind leg in your general direction.

Log in again with a different name asking for launch codes. Or don't.

[zedder]

Anyone else from the alledged '3rd Division South' remember Sam, the Ping Pong Ball and the Boss's office?;)

[Monty77]

Er,

I married that ping pong ball.

She's now called Susan and a mother of 5 in the Home Counties. I am selling the story to Kodak so please don't leak any more details.

Ta!

[Dan D'air]

I married that ping pong ball.

She must make you very happy. Sadly the only time that I met her, she was entertaining tourists in a Thai bar, but she was extremely good at her job and made lots of fat, bald men very happy indeed.

[L J R]

I was NOT at Tailhook!



...That's Official!

[Dan D'air]

Tailhook was just a fugly rumour, surely? Well, at least until after a few beers anyway. But I wasn't there and neither was anyone else. Ever.

[davejb]

I think it's only right to speak out at this point,
far too often rumour and innuendo have been allowed to confuse the picture, until fiction is accepted as fact, and history records what some might have wanted, rather than what actually happened.

So let it be said, here and now, without equivocation, that Sam used plums, not ping pong balls, whilst entertaining gentlemen of leisure during their off duty moments, I witnessed this a number of times. (It is to this that I ascribe a certain degree of infirmity in my dotage, although memories of these occasions does occasionally have a surprisingly restorative effect).

To the chap who married the ping pong ball my commiserations sir, you married an impostor.

[taxydual]

Ah, but were the plums smuggled in? Was tax payers money used to fund this plum trade? Was jam the outcome? Who got the jars?

The answers to these questions will be probed by our team of prize winning investigative reporters, only in todays Daily (Insert Gutter Press Title Here).

[Beatriz Fontana]

Whose plums were they? I think we should be told!

Don't tell me.... Victoria's....

[Monty77]

davejb

You utter bitch sir!

How dare you call my ping pong wife a plum.

Nectarine, maybe, plum, never!

Take a virtual slap, you cow, and consider yourself internetted-ly roundly scolded.

This place is worse than that bebopface-do-wap on that interweb jobber.