View Full Version : So, if one was invited to be a Feline, to which breed would one apply?

Sir George Cayley
19th Aug 2008, 20:51
I would very much like to be considered for the Maine Coon breed. Lovely medium long hair, great legs and just the right mix of aloofness combined with a light touch for the common human.;)

Dog lovers move over, the Senior Service is in town 2nite:ok:

Over to you my pussy cats.

Sir George Cayley

19th Aug 2008, 21:01
Border collie :E

Sorry, Sir, but we only have a cat because she needs less exercise than a dog. I really wouldn't want to be one!

19th Aug 2008, 22:07
remember, dogs have owners,
cats have staff....

and I wouldn't mind what sort I was - as long as I had good staff :D

19th Aug 2008, 22:51

One would want to be a Kliban (http://www.eatmousies.com/) cat.

19th Aug 2008, 22:54
There can be only one.


19th Aug 2008, 23:46
Apart from domestic cats in the developed world (and even then, not all of them), I don't believe that felines anywhere are having a great time in this early 21st Century.

I remember 6 months or so ago, reading about a leopard in Israel which had ostensibly been captured by the house-owner as it feebly-attempted to hunt their pudicat. Such is the state of felines today.

Let's admit it. There's not much hope for the world's remaining felines that are truly wild. Lots of blahblah from European countries that seek to protect their lynx or at least reintroduce them to an environment populated by powerful sheep-farmers etc.

So I guess, given the choice, I'd choose to be a leopard. And given that the future is so bleak, I'd hunt humans for fun (I wouldn't necessarily eat them, just kill them and leave them naked afterwards). Don't ask me why, I'd simply be following in the paws of the infamous man-eating leopard of Rudiprayag who claimed over 129 victims officially (or over 600 according to some). That's a tough target to match, the bitch must have had her reasons though. So, if you live up in the mountains in a secluded spot, make sure that you put outside a gigot d'agneau roasted to perfection with lots of garlic and thyme (bloody inside) with the trimmings (potatoes and carrots and stuff) at least once a week. I promise to look favourably on such sacrifice. Especially if you catch me afterwards slumbering with the sheep (even the worst of us need a cuddle) and allow me to finish my siesta in peace...?

DX Wombat
19th Aug 2008, 23:47
C-P :) :) :) :ok: :ok: Garfield is in a class of his own. :)

19th Aug 2008, 23:47
Any kind of pussy would be fun :E

19th Aug 2008, 23:54
simon's cat (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w0ffwDYo00Q) :ok:

Grew up with a cat like that.

19th Aug 2008, 23:58

I think my little mog Spot was cool.
Long gone now I'm afraid.

Other than that, a cougar or a leopard. Awesome pussy cats. :ok:

20th Aug 2008, 00:19

<affecting south eastern england accent> OOhhh that's not some weird sex game you play isn't it!

20th Aug 2008, 00:22
I would choose to be an African male lion, (Panthera leo), because of the laid-back lifestyle. Sleep most of the day, out on the prowl much of the night, no need to expend energy on hunting for food "on the hoof", the obliging lionesses do it all for you, all you would need to do would be:

look magnificent
growl and roar in the best MGM manner
swagger around when other males are about
perform as expected when David Attenborough is around
yawn a lot

20th Aug 2008, 01:13
603DX, you (conveniently?) forget the often terrible and ultimate sacrifice these male lions make in defence of their pride. I'm no expert, but from what I've seen in documentaries, male lions are jettisoned from their family (presumably because of concerns of inbreeding which don't concern the Kennel club...). They then consort with other young males and sometimes if lucky and numbers go their way, will succeed in ousting the males from another pride. By ousting, I mean of course, inflicting sufficient injuries that there is little likelihood of survival. In due course, these same males will be ousted in their turn. It all sounds like some demagogic female plot which it probably is. Does humping a few lionesses, killing a few lion cubs (because they're not your own and this will encourage the lionesses to mate again) sound like some form of paradise on earth?! Especially as one day surely, some other youngezr, fitter lion will do the same for you, leaving you to lick your wounds and reflect on your short, magnificent existence as you lie seriously injured, without the strength to repulse the jackals that gnaw at your hind quarters?!

PS. Between what lionesses put their males through and the manner in which modern governments treat single taxpayers (often male also) may lie a huge resemblance or affinity...?! :uhoh:

20th Aug 2008, 09:56
Well it has to be a Tiger. Magnificent creature. Furthermore, Mrs Tiger would say with smile and nudge, 'you old Tiger you'!

20th Aug 2008, 10:11
Spot on, Overfly. However if I could choose breed as well as slaves, a Maine Coone would be good as they are lovely natural cats. However being an Oriental or Siamese would be fun as well. Lithe, athletic, slender, silky strokeable fur, and a voice that demands attention / food / fuss / whatever.

20th Aug 2008, 10:29
I'd have a Yoda........ :)



From Fox News...

20th Aug 2008, 10:43

You are right, of course, about the down side of Leo's existence. My tongue was firmly in cheek regarding the perceived up side, as I hoped was evident from the tone.

I too have seen the wildlife documentaries showing the raw realities, and have also seen something of their habits, while working in East Africa. I was on a radio station survey in the Kora region shortly before George Adamson was murdered by Somali poachers in 1989, on his lion reserve. There was a man who knew better than most, the entire life cycle of these fascinating creatures, and I regret that we did not find the time to call on him then.

His death underlined the necessity for carrying the two armed Askaris with our survey party in the Landrover, in those parts. It's not only lions that have to endure savagery from within their own kind ....

20th Aug 2008, 10:59
I'd be a Black Cat With White Paws (DSH/moggy) - there must be a breed of these! In an ideal world (i.e. one where they're not shutting down rural Post Offices!), I'd belong to the village Postmistress, have plenty of fuss and attention from the customers and access to the countryside at the back. When she retires, the local pub agree to look after me where they are handsomely rewarding by my daily gifts of mice!



Takan Inchovit
20th Aug 2008, 11:25
I'd be swinging toward the meer-kat. :8