View Full Version : Step Into The Unknown

Alloa Akbar
6th Aug 2008, 18:10
Tomorrow I move into a new phase of my pitiful existence, and I wondered if I might draw upon you, my colleagues in this business for the benefit of your wisdom..

In the last 39 years, more so, the last 10, I have gone through 6 jobs, 10 cars, 7 houses, 2 divorces, 2 motorcycles, more hangovers than I care to remember, and more than my fair share of brushes with the law (Traffic taliban exclusive). Its been a hell of a ride, the highs have been stratospheric, the lows have been the polar opposite.. so what now?

I feel as though I ought to learn how to revive the dying flora in my garden, perhaps go on a clothes shopping splurge, and invest heavily in replica "Dockers" and a range of shoes from Wal-mart which provide comfort at a knock down cost?

I'm thinking that my motorcycle may be viewed as immature, and its time the crotch rocket was replaced by a nice cruiser, the 4 x 4 perhaps is a little frivolous, and a Prius is the way ahead? Lite beer seems to be tempting to my palate, and I am developing an interest in the origins of Eastern European red wines.

Lyle and Scott sweaters really are stylish aren't they? and I'm thinking that the ladies of the bridge club will really dig my khaki shorts with white ankle socks (Fully extended).

So which is the way to go.. skimmed milk, low fat sandwiches and a trans fat free diet, or should I trust in my tried and tested methods for negotiating this long winding path we call life..

and just go down to Hooters, get smashed and pick up some chick with big tits??

6th Aug 2008, 18:15
If you can manage the latter without undertaking the former, why bother with the former?
If, on the other hand, the latter remains but a dream, then the former is your sentence for the rest of your life . . .

6th Aug 2008, 20:07
Keep the bike, buy a 4x4, don't dress in sweaters and all that carp, jeans and T-shirts, even in winter, but most of all don't let go of the little boy that lives deep inside you, cause then you will start getting old.
Only 2 divorces, gotta way to go yet, your still young. (Wish I was 50 again) :ok::}:E

How do you remember hangovers,I always thought my head hurt because I couldn't remember the night before.

6th Aug 2008, 20:09
With the exception of a few enclaves, I don't think much of the former will be appreciated or even accepted in the place you list as residence although you probably could jack a Prius up, put some mud tires on it, and some lights on the roof.

And the talent for the latter: :(

edited to add: By the way, congratulations!

6th Aug 2008, 20:20
At the risk of being too serious, I would ask you, on a scale of 1-10, 'how does your current life rate'? And then I would ask you to describe what a '10' would look like?

What are the key differences?

Above all, I would ask you to think about what you want to be and what you want to do; what you want to have is a distant third and will actually fall out of your answers to the first two questions. If you try the 'what do I want to have' question first, you will find it extremely difficult (maybe impossible) to achieve the change you (seem) to be looking for.

Apologies if this dull. Comes of being a coach....but it works :)

6th Aug 2008, 20:50
keep the bike or get an older classic something like an old bmw.Do some gardening but make sure you have a shed with some home made wine in it along with a radio for some easy listening music get a pipe as well,you dont have to smoke it but you can just sit in the shed with those few simple things dreaming about your once a month visit to hooters.
I also start a new phase in my life next week.I move to the isle of man to work leaving the family back home.I have no choice but to go where the work is.On the upside i'm taking my bike with me even if i have to leave my clothes and belongings behind to fit it in the van!At fifty years old its a big move for me.

6th Aug 2008, 20:56
TWO motorbikes? What was the second? :ok: And is the third gonna be a Hog?

Don't grow up until you're as old as me!!



6th Aug 2008, 21:11
Are you boasting or whinging?

I've decided that next year (see 'age' opposite) is going to be the best year of my life and I'm starting to refine my planning around two specific dates. They are not dominating my thoughts yet but if I feel I'm in need of focus I can always switch on to one or the other and get back on track.

Cars, bikes, etc - is that how you define yourself? Is that the way you want to be defined?

Alloa Akbar
7th Aug 2008, 01:19
SSK - Despite the flippant manner in which the subject was presented, the subject matter was about dealing with change or navigating a crossroads in ones existence.:ok:

Interesting to read the experiences and attitudes of others, as I felt a change of country at 40 was challenging, but gents (And Whirls!!).. Thanks for reminding me that there are more ahead.


7th Aug 2008, 05:59
Hooters, beers, chicks, big cans. Nuff said? (you really had to ASK?!?) :E

7th Aug 2008, 06:11
oh kerist - another 'big' birthday neurosis panic attack eh dearie?! :rolleyes:

Now listen Mr AA - coindcidence that your initials are...? Nah, I think not, anyways, listen up you.

Gert that blimmin' big crotch rocket of yers buzzed up, make your way back over the bridge, giving the bordello car a ring on the way , and have another obviously much needed alcohol fuelled reality check interspersed with the occasional scandanavian grilling! :}

Then, get your sorry ass back on track mate! ;)

(oh - happy birthday btw :D itsa not so bad, itsa nicesa place, ah shaddup your face.... :E )

7th Aug 2008, 06:18
It seems you have explored everything life has to offer except a boyfriend. Give it a shot.

7th Aug 2008, 07:07
Oh I dunno, given AA's first career, it wouldn't surprise me if he'd had a few offers!!

Happy birthday hun - anyway, 50 is the new 40!!



8th Aug 2008, 22:37
Alloa, oh Alloa! Firstly, heard that occasional scandanavian grilling! :}can strip 'da paint and make grown man weep:E.... But, hey, you ARE a grown man now;), so no fear, muchas happiness and good health!!!
Alcohol fuelled reality checks are best given over the bridge, so get on that 'crotch rocket' and tervetuloa!

8th Aug 2008, 23:54

I retired from the first job at 53 (cos I could) and took up the second. No regrets!

The answer is up there ^ - what do you want to be? Or, as my beloved said to me at the time "What do you want to be when you grow up?" Once you've solved that, the rest falls into place.

I followed all the advice on my company-paid-for pre-retirement course: don't do anything sudden, don't move far away (unless you can't stand your friends and family), don't let the volunteer organisations nail you down every day of the week... and I bought a share in an aeroplane (Arrow III).

11 years on, that advice was good. OK, I work most Sundays and a bit during the week, but I can say yes or no every time. We settled down to the lifestyle we like (M decided that if I could give up work, so could she).

We sold the holiday cottage that was 300-odd miles (6+ hours) away, and bought one 90 minutes (80 miles) away. We used it about 4 days in 14, and love it. We now "belong" in two different communities (and I don't "work" in Norfolk).

I'd promised myself that when I retired, I'd buy a classic sports car and restore it etc. I've finally decided that I don't actually want all the faff, and have given up on that idea. Unless you know of a nice Austin-Healey 100/6 or 3000 (or similar) looking for a caring owner...

9th Aug 2008, 01:19
Its been a hell of a ride, the highs have been stratospheric, the lows have been the polar opposite.. so what now?

Roughly the same question one asks each morning over the first cup of coffee.

Answer one has found is "all of the above". Certainly your basic personality, habits, etc are not going to radically change without a lot of work or some wrenching disruption in life. Best to not design that into plan A.

Perhaps some time can be spent constructively discovering what you actually like & dislike, want & don't want, etc. Possessions and travel itineraries seldom answer these fundamental questions... they are merely a distraction.

One believes that schizophrenia is greatly underrated as a useful cope-ing mechanism. Step one is to do some introspection and try to localise who you really are and what you believe-don't believe, like-don't like, etc. Step two is to postulate some variations on what you now have/are that allow testing the theories just above. Step three is to devise some legal, non-hazardous and reversible strategies for acting out different models of who you might want to be.

And then play with it.

At worst this approach burns some time. At best, you get self-awareness. In all cases it gives you an adjustable transition strategy -- from wherever you are to wherever you are going to be.

Howard Hughes
9th Aug 2008, 01:45
Whatever you do,


Unless it's for one of your ex wives...;)

9th Aug 2008, 03:20
This thread screams "Suncreen"!

9th Aug 2008, 07:01
Despite the flippant manner in which the subject was presented, the subject matter was about dealing with change or navigating a crossroads in ones existence

10 or so years ago I was broke, out of work and ging through a messy divorce. The first thing to recognise is that this was all largely my fault and as a result of some very poor decisions on my part.

A new career - and very fulfilling it is - a new country (actually a couple of them) and, most surprisingly of all, a new, lovely, wife and I find myself as happy as a porker in the proverbial.

I am now 57 years old and my youngest child is younger than my granddaughter by 2 weeks.

The best advice I can give is to remain positive, make good decisions, don't ride Jap bikes, don't play golf and for ****'s sake don't buy a Prius.

9th Aug 2008, 08:05
:ok: RaraAvis....

B Fraser
9th Aug 2008, 10:16
What's up fellah ? Are you still misty eyed for the best that life has to offer or are you really contemplating listening to the Archers via internet radio ?

Take up free flying, join a band, go and hunt something for the pot, buy an air cooled 911, get yer nips pierced......anything.....Just don't buy an accordion.

(Tin hat on, watching out for incoming artillery shells from Norfolk)

9th Aug 2008, 15:50
Just remember;

Growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional! :ok:

Alloa Akbar
9th Aug 2008, 17:29
:O Nothing is actually "Up" I was just interested, given recent events and what-have-you, as to others experiences.. A moment of solitude, reflection and perhaps a splash of home-sickness you may say...:rolleyes:

Mr Fraser, sadly I still view you as a shining example of how one can get things right in the end.. misguided fool as I am!!!:p

The Mist hasn't cleared yet though..:E

One day I will realise that I am not the only immature 40 year old out there.. especially listening to some of you guys, I feel I am in the majority.. Hail the not so grown ups!!:}

9th Aug 2008, 17:30
Go get a Ducati. :ok:

9th Aug 2008, 18:01
Message erased 'cause I don't like to admit my age..:E

Alloa Akbar
10th Aug 2008, 02:48

I've got a Firestorm at the moment, but a decent 998 is right at the top of my priority list!!:ok:

10th Aug 2008, 07:54
There's nothing wrong with a Firestorm, although I will admit that the Aprilla and the Ducati will wipe the floor with it, but if you want V-twin (and what red-blooded hetro male wouldn't) go Ducati.

It just reads like a choice between staying straight or turning homo: not much of a choice really. But instead of going homo why not go the whole way, and have a sex change, then become a lesbian.

10th Aug 2008, 08:20
I had a 750ss a couple of years ago. it would splutter and cough when it saw rain,every warning light it had showed itself once a week for no good reason. it bent an exhaust valve 500 two week later a bearing gave up in the clutch 450 all on a bike with less than 7,000 miles on it.
But what a ride! and what a noise. That feeling when you open the garage door and see that bright red paintwork !!!! I want another:{

10th Aug 2008, 09:57
Alloa Akbar - It really doesn't matter what significant and wide ranging changes you plan, (or possibly execute), as soon as a new woman walks into your life all your 'crap' will either be in the loft or the skip. There will be an underpowered but very brightly painted two seater soft top in the garage, your stuff will be outside and clubs or organisations you join will be black listed a day or two after she moves in.

If you want to spend your time usefully and rewardingly and save yourself a lot of grief later you may as well just go out and find another women.:}

10th Aug 2008, 10:16
Less hassle to make it one you don't like, buy her a house then just get back to the boy's toys!

One day I will realise that I am not the only immature 40 year old out there..

But by then it will be too late, you'll be an immature fifty year old.

Alloa Akbar
10th Aug 2008, 16:43
Firestorm (feel like I am talking to my bike..:O)

So let me get this right, is my appreciation of the RSV Mille swingarm, (which IMHO is a work of art) gay???:*


Fella methinks the rain and Mr Brown are getting to you mate, sounds like you need a holiday!!:ok:

10th Aug 2008, 18:25
Get your eyes around this (http://www.webbikeworld.com/bimota/tesi-3d/) for engineering amazement. No idea how it goes, but to see one in the flesh (or metal/carbon fibre) is incredible.

20K I think.

Alloa Akbar
10th Aug 2008, 23:25

Quirky, certainly.. maybe even a little sexy, but under no circumstances could I bring myself to trust it, I still prefer forks joining the wheel to the bars.. must be my age!!! :}

Flame Lily FX
11th Aug 2008, 01:29
A Akbar

Buy yourself a jet washer. Quite a nice one that stands upright and has a variety of nozzle adjustments. Quite a radical approach that I suggest is a good way of affecting a smooth transition. You don't want to be crying yourself to sleep in an orthopedic ward following shot reflexes after putting your Harley into the side of a lorry... Nice clean patio - lovely!:p

15th Aug 2008, 03:33
Buy that Harley Dude.
Then start attending bike events, you can find them everywhere.
Buy the latest edition of American Iron Magazine.
Lists many bike rally s.
People from all walks of life.
All of this may sound strange , but it works.
Mid life crisis is hell, but fun once you get pointed in the right direction.

15th Aug 2008, 13:04
Buy that Harley Dude.

He hasn't got the stomach for it. Although he's probably working on it now he's on yankee size food portions. Lucky fella's so slim that if he puts a bandana on his head, anything over 20 mph would have him off the bike backwards with the slipstream. ;)