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smo-kin-hole
24th Mar 2008, 09:15
So my ride crapped out and I've been stuck in B**f**k, Egypt for 9 days. The bloodstain is still visible in the dent on the wall where I have been pounding my head. I hit a stud and shifted my aim 7 inches to the left. (I think US regulation stud distance is 16 inches so it should be about right) I have no internet, no T.V. no gaming laptop, no magnifying glass, and no ants. I can't do ashcan basketball any more, and the girthy crone at the counter is starting to look good.

Saigon. I'm still in Saigon. Somebody help me.

What do you do for entertainment in a situation like this?

BlueDiamond
24th Mar 2008, 09:22
Read a good book??? http://209.85.12.227/html/emoticons/unsure.gif

tony draper
24th Mar 2008, 09:31
Look up a chap called Moses ,He,s good at getting folks out of Egypt.:)

fernytickles
24th Mar 2008, 12:36
At least you've got some pretty monuments to look at. We r hanging around in Cayman for 9 days, tho' we do have internet and tv. Now on day 6 and can't wait for day 9...

We did find a 2nd hand book store, so have gone through 2 books in 2 days...

Tigs2
24th Mar 2008, 12:46
Change Hotel

Dan D'air
24th Mar 2008, 12:57
Change Hands.

DX Wombat
24th Mar 2008, 13:04
If you are starting to smell, :yuk: I would suggest you have a nice, long, hot shower with plenty of shower gel followed, when dry, by the application of large quantities of anti-perspirant / deodorant. Then dress in clean clothes. :ok: People might actually want to speak to you after this instead of fainting, or running away. :)

merlinxx
24th Mar 2008, 17:11
Go get brian hurtz pissed on good ole onion Stella. All of us in good ole JED had a sister called Stella in CAI, shame really as we all went to visit at the same time!!!

tony draper
24th Mar 2008, 17:15
Once stuck in Port Said forra week loading a deck cargo of tomatoes for Jeddah,wherever you are it can't possibly be worse than Port Said in the 1960's or Jeddah for that matter.
You buggas is spolit these days.
:)

Krystal n chips
24th Mar 2008, 17:59
Go and make friends with a camel.....up close and personal ...and from behind.....camels have a tendency to kick.....so, one broken bit ( or two ) later and you will be clean again, in a nice room and with lots of attention.....simple solution to your problem really.

Look at it this way.....you could be stuck in Cleethorpes, Skegness, Redcar , Grimsby, Sarfend or Barry....( edited to now include Frinton ) then you would have something to whinge about..but your not, you're in Egypt.....so STFU......:E

Anyway, here's some music to cheer you up.............

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U6K8wfyzAJQ

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rPnLK1WnXxg

traveler
24th Mar 2008, 18:04
.
. No Hostesses ?

frostbite
24th Mar 2008, 18:10
KnC, you forgot Frinton!


Where is Loose lately?

barry lloyd
25th Mar 2008, 00:21
The bloodstain is still visible in the dent on the wall where I have been pounding my head. I hit a stud and shifted my aim 7 inches to the left. (I think US regulation stud distance is 16 inches so it should be about right) I have no internet, no T.V. no gaming laptop, no magnifying glass, and no ants. I can't do ashcan basketball any more, and the girthy crone at the counter is starting to look good.
:confused:

Anyone have an English/English translation of this?

Americans abroad eh? Maybe they are better at home with a McDonalds/Pizza Hut/KFC/Wendys/Burger King/Taco Bell (select as appropriate) within reach. When will they learn that the rest of the world is not like the USA - thank God!

Wader2
25th Mar 2008, 12:30
Sit down on floor, back to the wall. Smash imaginary baseball into left hand. Throw imaginary baseball onto far wall and catch as it bounces off the floor.

Repeat 500 times.

Swap walls.

Throw and catch ball, repeat 500 times.

Call room service, ask for new imaginary ball.

Explain to very nice doctor what you have been doing.

Allow very nice nurse to spoon feed you.:}

merlinxx
25th Mar 2008, 15:06
Don't bring intellectual pursuits in to this:ugh::{ especially of the Septic sort:zzz:;)

shedhead
25th Mar 2008, 20:30
drink beer at regular intervals,if symptoms persist drink more beer!

Muffinman
25th Mar 2008, 23:35
If your going to take shedheads advice smokinhole, make sure you consume a couple a pints off 'harden the fcuk up'.

smo-kin-hole
30th Mar 2008, 22:52
I found a tube of aeroplane glue. I feel better now......i....think

bnt
31st Mar 2008, 08:11
:confused:

Anyone have an English/English translation of this?

That's something you can do if bored - use Babelfish (http://babelfish.altavista.com/) to take some text on a trip. Here's the original paragraph after a trip through France, Greece, then back to England:
Thus the tour me the chij abroad and coincjs in B**f**k, Egypt at the duration the 9 days. The mark of blood is still obvious in in the inequality in the wall that I had forged my head. I have struck a wedge and have left shifted my objective 7 measurements in inches to (I think that the legal distance of wedge it is USA of 16 measurements in inches thus these it will be supposed they are with regard to right) I do not have no internet, no one T.V. no portable computer of game, no one loupe, and no ant. I cannot make the basketball ashcan more, and the old woman girthy in the meter it begins in order to it appears good.
In the opposite direction, the results are different:
Thus my turn outside and I am blocked with of B**f**k, Egypt for 9 days. The bloodstain is still visible with the zoy' ljgma with the wall where I have it sfyrokopi' sej my head. I struck a support and moved my objective 7 inches with the man of the left (I think the distance from supports that of American payment it is 16 inches thus it is necessary for they are for the right) I do not have any Internet, any TV nobody lap-signal of lucky play, anybody by reinforcing glass, and no ant. I then not to make ashcan the different basketball, and girthy the old woman with the meter it starts to appear good.

aviate1138
31st Mar 2008, 09:14
"Here's the original paragraph after a trip through France, Greece, then back to England:"

Anyone tried doing this with the Bible? Again, - isn't that basically what happened all those years ago?

bnt
31st Mar 2008, 15:36
Anyone tried doing this with the Bible? Again, - isn't that basically what happened all those years ago?
Pretty much - except, despite what some folks think (http://www.fstdt.com/fundies/top100.aspx?archive=1), it didn't start in English... :=