View Full Version : Friday Joke

Lon More
21st Mar 2008, 14:02
One day my mother was out and my dad was in charge of me.

I was about 3 years old and had just recovered from a nasty fall.

And I had got my hands on one of Dad's empty beer bottles.

I loved to play with it and act grown up.

Dad was in the living room, engrossed in the evening news when I brought him a bottle of beer, which of course, was just water.

After several of these beers, yum yum's and lots of praise for such good beer, my Mum came home.

My Dad made her wait in the living room to watch me bring him a bottle of beer, because it was 'just the cutest thing!'

My Mum waited, and sure enough, here I came down the hall with a beer for Daddy and she watched him drink it all up.

Then she said to Dad, "Did it ever occur to your simple mind, that the only place that boy can reach to get you water, is the toilet??"

Lon More
21st Mar 2008, 14:04

21st Mar 2008, 14:09
Sign on the door of a vet's waiting room: "Back in five minutes. Sit... Stay!"

A sign over a gynaecologist's office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix"

On the door of a plastic surgeon's office: "We can help you pick your nose!"

At an optometrist's office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."

On a maternity room door: "Push. Push. Push."

In the front yard of a funeral home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait."

A sign in the non-smoking area of a restaurant: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."

Outside a muffler shop: "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."

Ad on the side of a plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed."

Another slogan on the truck of a plumbing company: "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."

On an electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts."

Pizza shop slogan: "Seven days without pizza makes one weak."