Out of the Mouths etc

[kphx]

This is my very first post here after lurking for a few years......so please be gentle (to start with!). Just read through the thread about having confidence in the Secretary of State for Defence which got me thinking about the things they say to us when visiting stns, deployments etc which don't really inspire confidence! A long time ago in another life I was on Ascension and John Nott, the then SOS for D, visited our detachment, came into our ops tent and during the ensuing meeting and greeting asked us "How long have these Valiants been tankers?" Makes you wonder!!:ugh:

[RETDPI]

I was on parade with Beags once when the Queen Mum asked the guy next to us if he was considering joining the RAF.

[1.3VStall]

Didn't Buff Hoon once climb out of the back of an aircraft and ask the assembled chaps "And how are things in Bosnia"? As I recall the succinct reply was "Actually, sir, you are in Kosovo!"

[Inspector Dreyfuss]

Mid 80s at UWAS on parade with SofS visiting:
Heseltine: How is your flying training going?
Stude: I have just gone solo, Sir.
Hesletine: Does that mean that you are on your own?

[An Teallach]

My favourite was Mrs T on her post-war visit to the Falklands. On visiting an artillery battery, she was given the opportunity to fire a light gun. The weapon had a small metal seat for the firer. Just before firing the gun, she turned and asked: "Will this thing jerk me off?"

[Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!]

I was on parade with Beags once when the Queen Mum asked him "I know you. Didn't you serve with my grandfather?" :E

[SirToppamHat]

Any chance the Mods could merge this with the classic:

'I Wish I Hadn't Said That' thread? (http://www.pprune.org/forums/showthread.php?t=48116)

STH

[Pontius Navigator]

The Av Med School at Luffenham always paraded the photograph of Harold Wilson with a bone dome on back to front. To be fair, it had no visor or visor track.

[teeteringhead]

To be fair, it had no visor or visor track. ..... hmmmmm

One would have thought the "pigtail" dangling between the eyes would have been something of a clue.........

But then bonedomes are strange things to those unused to them..... I recall giving a jolly to some local VIP (Mayor or something) in a Squirrel or Gazelle (memory ain't what it was and logbooks aren't handy). His worship was so pleased with the trip that on landing he immediately switched on his mobile and tried to tell the mayoress all about it ..... still with bonedome on! That would have been a good piccie ...:)

[Wyler]

We have just had a visit from the CinC. He told us that times are hard, there is no money, cuts will be made, we will all have to share the load.


To tell us this, he was flown in by Gazelle Helicopter.......and he brought his wife.................:ugh: :ugh:


My favourite:
AOC to JT. 'How long have you been here'?
JT to AOC 'About 10 minutes'.

[Fluffy Bunny]

Times must be hard. Last time I saw the CinC he was flying in a Twin Squirrels or A109. :)

[Pontius Navigator]

teeteringhead, you must be very young.

Harold Wilson was around before the Mk 2 bone dome and at a time when lowly rear crew just made do with the simple, unadorned Mk 1. If it was too bright outside we had to put on piggy glasses with sprung wire clips over the ears.

Both were hellish uncomfortable and worn as little as possible.

There were no big headed aircrew in those days.:}