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Davaar
6th Dec 2006, 16:41
I sometimes took note of the wisdom I met over the years. Just came across this one:

"As you grow old, you lose your interest in sex, your friends drift away, your children ignore you. There are many other advantages, of course, but these seem to me the outstanding ones." [anon].

Any others floating around?

tony draper
6th Dec 2006, 16:56
All the great men are dead now,and I'm not feeling too well myself.
:rolleyes:

frostbite
6th Dec 2006, 16:59
Nothing matters very much and most things don't matter at all.

UL730
6th Dec 2006, 20:55
If you don't have a kind word - at least be vague

John Prescott
6th Dec 2006, 21:02
If you lend a friend £20 and never see them again-it was probably money well spent!

VFE
6th Dec 2006, 21:19
"If we cannot be free then at least we can be cheap"

......;Frank Zappa.

VFE.

Whirlygig
6th Dec 2006, 21:26
There is no pleasure on this earth worth sacrificing for an extra five years in the Sunnyside Old People's Home - Horace Rumpole (John Mortimer)

And

I tell you, we are here on Earth to fart around, and don't let anybody tell you different - Kurt Vonnegut.

Cheers

Whirls

dontpickit
6th Dec 2006, 22:06
“If money is your hope for independence you will never have it. The only real security that a man will have in this world is a reserve of knowledge, experience, and ability.”

"You can't learn in school what the world is going to do next year".

Henry Ford

Fun Police
6th Dec 2006, 22:32
"don't eat yellow snow."
anonymous
:}

Buster Hyman
6th Dec 2006, 22:35
Learn to be sincere...even if you have to fake it!


It's bad luck to be superstitious!


Answer the phone because you choose to, not because you have to.

AcroChik
6th Dec 2006, 23:22
From a single conversation with a former student:

Ignore noise.

Patterns of events are illusory.

Probability distributions are unevenly distributed.

If you don't know what your edge is, you don't have one.

Have the courage to go wherever the data takes you.

In life and work, as in archery, whenever there's effort, force, straining or struggling, it's wrong. The perfect act is one that requires no effort.

Everyone gets what they want out of the market.

And from someone else:

Play it for the humor.

Gnirren
7th Dec 2006, 00:49
"don't eat yellow snow."
anonymous
:}

"Always eat yellow snow, it might be beer!"

Blacksheep
7th Dec 2006, 00:58
Try everything at least once - if you like it you can do it again; if you don't it doesn't matter.

Fun Police
7th Dec 2006, 01:28
"Always eat yellow snow, it might be beer!"

i was taught that it might have been beer at one time. i hope i wasn't misled :sad:

Capt Chambo
7th Dec 2006, 02:43
Wasn't it " Ho, ho where the huskies go, don't you eat that yellow snow".
Frank Zappa.

FL460
7th Dec 2006, 10:10
I try to please one person every day. Today is not your turn and tomorrow's not looking good either!

Anon

tony draper
7th Dec 2006, 10:28
Moderation in all things,including moderation.:uhoh:

VitaminGee
7th Dec 2006, 10:50
Rules for males over 60:
1. Never pass a toilet. 2. Never waste an erection. 3. Never trust a fart.

and, if given a choice, Parkinson's is better to have than Alzheimer's - spilling half your pint is one thing, forgetting where you left it.......:eek:

Dark Star
7th Dec 2006, 11:00
Re 2. above :-

even if you are on your own ! :ok:

fireflybob
7th Dec 2006, 11:11
80% of success is just turning up (when you need to be there) - Woody Allen (I think).

A journey of 1,000 miles starts with one small step.

The past does not equal the future (unless you live in the past).

If you discipline yourself to do the things you need to do when you need to do them, then one day the day will come when you can do the things you want to do when you want to do them.

The journey (in life) IS the destination.

When the student is ready the teacher appears (Zen Proverb)

I can't means I must!

If you are committed there is always a way.

Demand more from yourself than anyone else demands from you.

An act of kindness starts a never ending chain.

bar fly
7th Dec 2006, 11:17
Its not the cough that carries you off, it's the coffin they carry you off in.

PanPanYourself
7th Dec 2006, 11:22
Advertisements have us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. We are the middle children of history, man, no purpose or place. We have no great war, no great depression. Our great war is a spiritual war. Our great depression is our lives. We've all been raised by television to believe that one day we'll all be millionaires and movie gods and rock stars - but we won't. We're slowly learning that fact, and we're very, very pissed off.

-Tyler

GANNET FAN
7th Dec 2006, 12:45
* Borrow money from pessimists - they don't expect it back.

* I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.

* OK, so what's the speed of dark?

* How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?

* If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.

* Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

* When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

* What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

* Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

* If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

* A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.

* Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

* The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.

* To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

* The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.

* The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.

* The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.

* Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.

VFE
7th Dec 2006, 21:00
Abraham Lincoln: "Sometimes it's better to be thought of as stupid than to open ones mouth and remove all doubt"

George W Bush (talking about Iraq today): "It's bad out there, heh heh heh!"

:eek:

VFE.