View Full Version : Women and Football...oh dear

Suppers Ready
25th Nov 2006, 09:53
Alledgedly true:
This is a true story from an Arsenal Season Ticket Holder from last
Season and highlights the fact that woman just don't get football.

His season-ticket last year was an absolute plum seat half way up the
Highbury main stand close to the half-way line. In other words, a TV
camera style view.

Anyway, after the first few games of the season it became apparent that
despite all the home games being sell-outs, the two seats on his left
were always empty. This continued until just after Christmas when all of
a sudden a guy and his young son appeared there.

After a few weeks of sitting next to this guy and his son, he decided to
ask if the guy knew why the seats had been empty for half the season.

The response is legendary:
Yeah don't even go there mate. The wife bought me and my son a season
ticket but decided it would be a nice idea to give us them for
Christmas. I was f***in' raging!'

25th Nov 2006, 09:59
Buy a season ticket for Xmas? The waiting list is over 10 years.......

tony draper
25th Nov 2006, 10:36
Slightly off topic, daftest thing I ever did re tickets,had some work to do in a Building Society,pulls up, and there's a nice fat pay and display parking space right at the door, right I'll have some of that one thinks, machine on the wall about twenty feet away so goes up and feeds it hours worth of coins and gets the ticket,then thinks,hold on! more than a hours worth of work in that place, so feeds machine another hours worth of coins and gets another ticket,eeeaaaaww!!!! of course both tickes expire at the same time,one uses the excuse that finding a parking space like that was so rare it threw one into a tizzy.
:uhoh: :rolleyes:

Cee of Gee
25th Nov 2006, 10:47
Sounds like his wife did him a favour!:p

25th Nov 2006, 11:09
Aren't the men who play football women already? (hairnets, earings, makeup, prima donna's, softer than warm butter, fake injuries, waxed chests..etc etc)

Dons ma rugby hardhat for incoming but not for soccer players cos they can only scratch, spit or slap:}

25th Nov 2006, 13:31
Rugby, a game for men with funny shaped balls

Rugby, a game for men who like cuddling other men

Rugby, a game associated with public schools and all the sexual deviancy for which they are noted

25th Nov 2006, 13:46
True or not, that's a great story... :ok:

Lon More
25th Nov 2006, 15:30
In their teens, men play rugby
In their twenties, men play soccer
In their thirties, men play snooker
In their forties and beyond, men play golf.

Which all goes to prove ...

As men get older their balls get smaller

Brian Dixon
25th Nov 2006, 17:08
The offside rule explained for girls

You're in a shoe shop, second in the queue for the till. Behind the shop assistant on the till is a pair of shoes which you have seen and which you must have.

The female shopper in front of you has seen them also and is eyeing them with desire.

Both of you have forgotten your purses.

It would be totally rude to push in front of the first woman if you had no money to pay for the shoes.

The shop assistant remains at the till waiting.

Your friend is trying on another pair of shoes at the back of the shop and sees your dilemma.

She prepares to throw her purse to you.

If she does so, you can catch the purse, then walk round the other shopper and buy the shoes.

At a pinch she could throw the purse ahead of the other shopper and, *whilst it is in flight* you could nip around the other shopper, catch the purse and buy the shoes.

Always remembering that until the purse has *actually been thrown* it would be plain wrong to be forward of the other shopper.

There you go poppet.


25th Nov 2006, 18:18
...and remember, if you go down holding the purse, then as soon as it touches the gorund, you must release it.