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AWYRCYMRY
13th Aug 2006, 11:57
Any body know jokes involving aviation (pilot ATC groundcrew ETCETC)
:ok:

TOWER- G-BNSY is there something wrong

G-BNSY- Yes i have lost my compass

TOWER- Judging by the way you are flying it looks like you have lost your whole instrument panel.....


MY favourite :ok: :ok:

G-ZUZZ
13th Aug 2006, 11:59
I don't get it... Can the tower see G-BNSY from where they're at?

If G-BNSY is that close to the tower, why would he need a compass?

allan907
13th Aug 2006, 12:23
Wait for the Monday Joke Thread:mad:

-james-
13th Aug 2006, 13:01
You might like to try here: clicky (http://www.pprune.org/forums/showthread.php?t=59309).

AWYRCYMRY
13th Aug 2006, 13:22
I don't get it... Can the tower see G-BNSY from where they're at?

If G-BNSY is that close to the tower, why would he need a compass?



:} <<<<<<<<<<<<TRANSPONDER>>>>>>>>>>>:}

hingey
13th Aug 2006, 18:19
Quote:
Originally Posted by G-ZUZZ
I don't get it... Can the tower see G-BNSY from where they're at?
If G-BNSY is that close to the tower, why would he need a compass?
<<<<<<<<<<<<TRANSPONDER>>>>>>>>>>>
Then shouldn't it be:
RADAR: G-BNSY is there something wrong?
etc
h

G-CPTN
13th Aug 2006, 18:54
Perhaps he dropped it and was trying to recover it from the floor . . .

Jerricho
13th Aug 2006, 19:08
Anyone ever heard this great story about the aircraft carrier and a lighthouse?

G-CPTN
13th Aug 2006, 19:24
You mean the one where the lighthouse has to 'go around'?

matt_hooks
13th Aug 2006, 22:07
Not directly aviation, but in the right ball park.

An award should go to the gate agent in Denver for being smart and funny, and making her point, when confronted with a passenger who probably deserved to fly as cargo.

During the final days at the old Stapleton airport, a crowded flight was cancelled.

A single agent was rebooking a long line of inconvenienced travelers. Suddenly an angry passenger pushed his way to the desk. He slapped his ticket down on the counter and said, "I HAVE to be on this flight and it has to be FIRST CLASS." The agent replied, "I'm sorry sir. I'll be happy to try to help you, but I've got to help these folks first, and I'm sure we'll be able to work something out." The passenger was unimpressed. He asked loudly, so that the passengers behind him could hear, "Do you have any idea who I am?"

Without hesitating, the gate agent smiled and grabbed her public address microphone. "May I have your attention please?" she began, her voice bellowing throughout the terminal. "We have a passenger here at the gate WHO DOES NOT KNOW WHO HE IS. If anyone can help him find his identity, please come to the gate."

With the folks behind him in line laughing hysterically, the man glared at the agent, gritted his teeth and swore "F### you."

Without flinching, she smiled and said, "I'm sorry, sir, but you'll have to stand in line for that, too."

The man retreated as the people in the terminal applauded loudly. Although the flight was cancelled and people were late, they were no longer angry.

G-CPTN
13th Aug 2006, 22:13
I LOVE people like that (agent).
My (much) older brother started me off down that line, and I've tried to copy this trait. The Goon Show strengthened that. I shared a house with a guy who's rapid sharp wit was something that I still aspire to.
It IS possible to train yourself to instant responses (such as saying "Pardon?" whenever ears or deafness is mentioned), so I guess that doing the sort of repetitive job as 'ticket agent' creates opportunities which might be missed once or twice, but ultimately provide the chance of venting your spleen. Also, the 'backroom staff' of such operations probably also provide stimulus for such banter (as the second reply).
I still admire her . . .

matt_hooks
13th Aug 2006, 22:16
Indeed, but can you imagine being married to her?

Simwings
13th Aug 2006, 22:19
Firstly I'd like to say: Why is it in ALL films involving aircraft ,(with the exception of a few factual films, thriller/spy films and Nat Geo's Aircrash investigation) - You know it's doomed if there are nuns on it.

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Here's my joke: Set in UK - Three elderly chavs, (well, in their 40's, that's old for chavs) turn up at the EZ gate p***ed to high hell. When they explain why they've got more booze in them than a brewery at harvest time, they tell the lady at the gate: "Awww, Ye See it's bettur' t'be pssed on an aircraft"

- as witnessed by myself at L/pool sometime in '02.

G-CPTN
13th Aug 2006, 22:36
Indeed, but can you imagine being married to her?
Of course! Someone with the ability to defuse a difficult, perhaps aggressive, situation is a gem. I bet she doesn't smack her children (if any) or have to raise her voice to get respect from them. Of course she might beat me witwise, but i'm sure I'd learn something from her.

matt_hooks
13th Aug 2006, 22:43
I bet she wasn't blonde tho! ~(ducks flying crockery from all the blondes)

G-CPTN
13th Aug 2006, 22:56
Blondes don't HAVE to be clever to succeed in life. They can lie back and earn a fortune.

Felix Saddler
13th Aug 2006, 23:07
Blondes don't HAVE to be clever to succeed in life. They can lie back and earn a fortune.

Yep, just lie back and open their legs!

G-CPTN
13th Aug 2006, 23:10
"YOU might very well think that. I couldn't possibly comment."
(Francis Urquhart in House of Cards)

PPRuNe Radar
13th Aug 2006, 23:34
Thread closed.

Been running for ages here

ATC Humour (http://www.pprune.org/forums/showthread.php?t=59309)