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Jinkster
4th Aug 2006, 23:14
http://www.usatoday.com/life/music/news/2004-04-18-worst-songs_x.htm

Comments - its one of my best!! :eek:

con-pilot
4th Aug 2006, 23:32
Dang, I liked that song, oh well, shows how in tune I am.

BOFH
5th Aug 2006, 01:27
Nonononono! Please stop!

If there were any justice, it'd be ten minutes of 'I write the songs' for both of you.

BOFH (Chirpy chirpy cheep cheep)

And having seen the accurs'd 'Ebony and Ivory' in the article, my attitude towards Lady Heather has softened - she should get the lot.

pigboat
5th Aug 2006, 01:32
Any worst song list that doesn't have Honey, Watching Scotty Grow, Seasons In The Sun and Giddy Up Go on it ain't much of a list. :yuk: :yuk: :yuk: :yuk:

planepsycho
5th Aug 2006, 02:24
Gotta add a couple
Wildfire by Michael Murphy
"She comes down yellow mountain
On a dark flat land she rides
On a pony she named Wildfire":yuk:
Muskrat Love (captain and tenille version):yuk:
That Barbie Girl song sucks pretty bad too:yuk:

BombayDuck
5th Aug 2006, 06:14
Dave Barry's List (http://www.cs.umd.edu/~gasarch/HUMOR/worstsongs.html)

All those I haven't heard, I intend to.. er... get hold of! :E

Buster Hyman
5th Aug 2006, 09:22
Absolute shocker! Deserved it's place in history!

Now, for good listening, "Its raining men" is hard to go past!http://www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/spezial/Fool/git.gif

http://www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/lachen/laughing-smiley-014.gif

Cheerio
5th Aug 2006, 10:29
Good choice, but as a general rule of thumb, any song that stimulates people to punch the air in unison would be worthy of the list - I'm thinking Euro Rock...... 'Live is Life (na na na nana)' The dreaded rock anthem.
On the other hand there is much to be said for the inclusion of any that stimulate mass swaying with lighters (or mobiles nowadays) illuminated..... The dreaded power ballad.

planeenglish
5th Aug 2006, 11:00
50 is not enough. All songs by Huey Lewis and Belinda Carlisle would eat up the majority of that list leaving sadly, little space for the rest of the crap that somehow gets recorded. :ugh: Who pays for this stuff? :eek:

BTW, Dave Barry is way before his time, just a perfect example of a human being. :ok:

pe

Ozzy
5th Aug 2006, 16:40
anything by Prince:yuk:

Ozzy

Mycroft
6th Aug 2006, 19:20
I think that it is a fairly standard practice to get publicity for this sort of poll by simply being controversial; don't think they'd be published in a top newspaper (even if it is a US tabloid) if they had (for example) just printed the No 1's with lowest sales figures. It stands to reason thay if they were very popular 10 years ago, many people would still like them

Pan Pan Splash
7th Aug 2006, 00:45
Ok so the songs are dreadful, but how many 30 - 40 year old ppruners can honestly laugh, without having the burden of ownership of one of the songs on their conscience??

I had Wang Chung.. yeah yeah, laugh it up!!:ugh:

Revolutionarry
7th Aug 2006, 00:53
No doubt about it, it's got to be the effin Birdy Song, how this F***ing piece of S**t kep Vienna by Ultravox at number 2 for months is quite bewildering, Keith Harris and Orville with that piece of S**t that they sang is also a serious rater.

pigboat
7th Aug 2006, 01:20
Ok so the songs are dreadful, but how many 30 - 40 year old ppruners can honestly laugh, without having the burden of ownership of one of the songs on their conscience??

I had Wang Chung.. yeah yeah, laugh it up!!:ugh:

My excuse is, "Honey" came with Mrs. p.

AMF
7th Aug 2006, 04:10
Too many one-hit wonder songs to list, although Dave Barry's list notes many of them. I'd add to it every disco (or nowadays "dance music") "song" ever made.
But seriously, except for "Hey Jude", every Beatle's song sucks, and sucks large. Every single last one of them. The music world would have been a far, far better place if someone had heard the Fab Four pre-fame, and quickly shuffled them off to writing TV commercial song ditties for Fab laundry detergent instead (or toothpaste commercials...that would have been suitable too). It's safe to say their fame can be attributed to easily obtainable drugs of the era or repressed 14 year-old British girls' brains.

But instead deserved obscurity, I've been subjected to hearing their overrated, irritating jingles and psuedo-tune nonsense masquerading as music around every turn of the dial my entire life, and I'm just not buying into the hype (and now the myth), thank you.

BombayDuck
7th Aug 2006, 08:23
AMF, I'm glad you haven't been subjected to Himesh Reshamiya (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Himesh_Reshamiya).

I don't know a single person who likes his voice and yet his music is the played the most on radio and TV both.

I agree with you about the Beatles, too. I *do* like some songs, but then someone plays "I am the Walrus" or "Yellow Submarine"..... :yuk:

I also heard this song (http://homepage.ntlworld.com/gary.hart/lyricss/sarstedt.html) on radio the other day.... can't believe it spent FOUR WEEKS at #1 on the UK charts. :yuk:

Tricky Woo
7th Aug 2006, 08:35
Well, there was a time when Spandau Ballet were a half-decent band.

And then they brought out "True". A repetitive dirge that simply never seemed to stop. My heart sank every time I heard the opening bars. "Sh1te sh1te sh1te, it's on again. SH!TE!" And just to show that the people deserve everything they get three times over, it shot to number one and stayed there for weeks.

As the song inevitably saturated every listeners lug-holes with pap, its popularity thankfully declined, and life returned to normal.

And then the basturds brought out "Gold". A copy & paste, if ever I heard of one.

"Sh1te sh1te sh1te, will this lot never let up?"

TW

DirtyPierre
13th Aug 2006, 12:48
Tricky Woo,

Mrs Pumfrey's dog from All Creatures Great and Small. We have a position report named after that dog. It's about 40 NE of YBBN (Brisbane), but we call it TRIKI (5 letter waypoint).

My mates and I used to call Spandau Ballet - The Perry Como Ensemble. Yes they did get boring.

woolyalan
24th Aug 2006, 10:40
Well, i dont know what to say, The Birdie Song has just come on the radio!!!! I want to break it, but we only have one radio in the office, and it will only tune to Signal 1 :ugh: What a very bad radio station!

angels
24th Aug 2006, 10:47
Can't believe that no-one has mentioned 'Grandad' by Clive Dunn and 'Whatsamatter you' or whatever the fecking title was by Joe Dolce.

Suicide-inducing stuff......

Earthmover
24th Aug 2006, 11:00
Bombay Duck ... not only did 'this song' stay in the charts for four weeks but it mentions Juans-les Pins - which we have to avoid on the approach to Nice by doing the dreadful 'RIVIERA' arrival ... and we don't want to be reminded of it in song!

My vote goes to 'Two Little Boys' by Rolf Harris (a nice bloke who was a friend of my late uncle, but who seriously lost the plot with this one) and 'Grandad' by, I think, Clive Dunn? :yuk: :yuk: :yuk:

Earthmover
24th Aug 2006, 11:03
Angels - we posted the same awful song simultaneously!:D

angels
24th Aug 2006, 11:13
Earthmover - We did indeed! And rightly so!

Agree about Rolf Harris being a decent cove. I used to bump into him when he lived in a big gaff in Sydenham, S.London (I was in a bedsit that should have been condemned).

Top bloke.

TURIN
24th Aug 2006, 11:14
Any song that includes a 'vocoder' or a synth voice edit.

Especially that load of old tripe by Cher! "do you beleeeeeeeeeeeve in......":yuk: :mad:

ormus55
24th Aug 2006, 11:17
so many to list, so little time left.
:ugh: :ugh: :ugh:

Earthmover
24th Aug 2006, 11:28
True, so true!

Now, what 'orrible process is happening to me in my dotage?... you see, what concerns me is how much I've disliked The Fastest Milkman in the West by Benny Hill until driving home from the airport the other day ... it was played on radio 2 and I found myself chuckling ... aaaarrrgh! :uhoh:

ormus55
24th Aug 2006, 11:39
to my everlasting shame, i purchased, little white bull, by tommy steele.


mind you i was only 9 yrs old so i plead innocence. it was my first record buy with my own money.
6s/9d i think it was.

Earthmover
24th Aug 2006, 11:49
Fear not Ormus, there are skeletons in every cupboard .. at a most similar age I acquired, by choice, Big John (you know... Big bad John) by Jimmy Deane and compounded the lapse of taste by purchasing the sequel (come to think of it ... it might have been the 'B' side) which I think was called Cajun Queen. ..... Jeez :(

panda-k-bear
24th Aug 2006, 12:14
"The Final Countdown" has me reaching for the sick bag every time. That and about 98% of the pap that is in the charts today - rap and R&B.

Bleurgh

Foss
24th Aug 2006, 12:28
Whitney Houston and that song from Bodyguard, IIIIIIIIIIII eee IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII will always love youuuu.

She'll need a Bodyguard if she ever comes near here.
Awful.

Have to admit I did buy Marillion albums :O
the shame, the shame

Fos

frostbite
24th Aug 2006, 13:03
Think the first record I ever bought was Danny & the Juniors 'At the Hop'.

Believe it was a 78, also in the six shilling area.

ozangel
24th Aug 2006, 14:51
How could you forget:
Macarena
Ketchup Song
Agadoo
Anything Dannii Minogue, but particularly 'This is it'
Cruisin (sung by Gwenyth Paltrow in that crap movie)

Hirsutesme
24th Aug 2006, 14:53
[quote=AMF]Too many one-hit wonder songs to list, although Dave Barry's list notes many of them. I'd add to it every disco (or nowadays "dance music") "song" ever made.
But seriously, except for "Hey Jude", every Beatle's song sucks, and sucks large. Every single last one of them


You are of course entitled to your opinion, you numbskull, oh I'm sorry, that may be deemed as offensive. I certainly hope so.

Grainger
24th Aug 2006, 15:15
I nominate the 1985 shocker "Kyrie Eleison" by MR Mister for both worst song and worst name for a band.

There's very few records that have me reaching for the "off" button so congratulations guys.

djk
24th Aug 2006, 15:19
Anyone noticed that list is 2 years old?

Also the list was compiled by USA Today, so songs like "Grandad" by Clive Dunn or even "Grandma (we love you) by The St Winifred's School Choir wouldn't even be mentioned.
You can really delve deeper and list "The Floral Dance" by Terry Wogan

Grainger,
The song by Mr Mister is actually called "Kyrie" there is another song called "Kyrie Eleison" but that was by The Electric Prunes and was featured in the movie Easy Rider

Grainger
24th Aug 2006, 15:22
Yeh - otherwise "Glorious" :yuk: by Captain would be at the top.

Another off-button job. Sounds like the guy is choking on something.

Must have a good publicist / manager, because it seems always to be on the playlists at the moment and as often as not, instead of just playing the damned thing the presenter almost wets himself saying how great it is. It isn't.

Minty Fresh
24th Aug 2006, 16:09
I always thought it was Joe Dolce who kept Ultravox off Number 1

Anyway who cares that and the Birdy Song are equally Sh!te

Two words though - Celine Dion

Or to quote Paul Carf "That chart topping hit every looser wins by Nick f**kin Berry - BAG O' SHITE"

Grainger
24th Aug 2006, 17:38
Thanks for the clarification djk - Mr Mister are definitely the perpetrators. "Kyrie" is the one that makes me want to smash the radio !

No axe to grind with The Electric PRuNes. Let's face it, they've gotta be in the running for the best band name (hey, maybe we should book 'em for the GatBash !).

djk
24th Aug 2006, 17:56
Not a problem Grainger.
Strangely enough, The Electric Prunes are one of the few bands from the late 60s where the original members are still alive.

If I might add Anita Dobson singing "Anyone can fall in love" to the list.

C130 Techie
24th Aug 2006, 19:08
Agree with Minty Fresh anything by Celine Dion is awful:yuk:

Have a few dodgy items in my record collection too. Anyone admit to remembering Teddy Bear by Red Sovine from 1981.

On marriage I inherited There's no one quite like Grandma and lots of Showaddywaddy:eek:

madherb
24th Aug 2006, 19:24
Geoge Michael - Careless Whispers - got to rate up there as well. :yuk:

ShyTorque
24th Aug 2006, 21:09
Sorry, you've all got it wrong.

For a start, Benny Hill's everlasting "Ernie - the fastest milkman in the west" is a true classic. :ok:

Compared to Timmy Mallet's "Yellow polka dot bikini"........ ;)

J.O.
24th Aug 2006, 23:38
Me too on the Celine Dion thing. Canada's worst export (Vegas can have her!). Hey Celine, why the long face?

But for worst song, my vote goes to "99 Luftballoons" by Nena. :yuk: