View Full Version : Seat Allocation/ boarding passengers!

23rd Jul 2006, 20:50
Rows 1-8 Board first please (http://news.cheapflights.co.uk/flights/2005/10/now_boarding_ro.html)

Internal flight in the States. All the seats were taken except the one next to me. Large pax waddling down the Aisle and you guessed it flopped down in the seat next to me.

Ok, I m biased as I usually share with one other separated by a good distance. But this was the worst 2 hour flight I ever had! No way could I even visit the ladies!:*

Anyone else agree with the opening thread link? The amount of large people we carry, I think the average weight should be 95kgs for Adult as standard! Not wanting to upset, but the excuses for alot of obese people are amazing!

23rd Jul 2006, 21:25
Simple approach to problem, surely.

Ban them from enclosed public places. Seems from that article there's already a passive consequence to them being in the air alongside you - i.e. pretty immediate death to everyone else on board. But not only that, they consume disproportionately more of every resource imagineable, I'd be interested in the correlation between population obesity and the oil price (for a start), greenhouse gases (methane), landfill (plastic KFC buckets), etc...

My eye is on california to lead the path to our collective utopia...


23rd Jul 2006, 21:37
Psychology! If yer wants the fatties to move yer has to REWARD them with FOOD.

"Owing to the present passenger distribution, the Captain is afraid to take off. He would like some of you gorgeous cuddly girls (and gorgeous cuddly boys) to join him near the front of the 'plane. After take-off, the Captain will personally come out and talk with you , . . . AND you will be rewarded with a complimentary bag of nosh."

Either that or merely ask the Aisle seat passengers to move forward 'Where you will have even MORE space to relax and enjoy the flight - NOT YOU, SKINNY! Thank-you . . . "

23rd Jul 2006, 21:55
yer has to REWARD them

You capitalist [email protected]@rd. C'mon, play the game eh, BAN the f*ckers...


Wile E. Coyote
24th Jul 2006, 00:07
In 2000, a fat :mad: sat next to me on a flight from the US to LHR, the armrest had to be raised for them to sit, and I was squashed sideways. I couldn't move, I couldn't eat, I couldn't drink......
The cabin crew did :mad: when I pointed out I couldn't actually "sit" in my seat - but I decided to "tough it out". Full flight across the pond....
After 8 hours, my back went into total spasm and I spent the next week in bed on a diet of ibuprofen, codeine and paracetamol.
If this happens again , I'll inform the crew that as I'm not being provided with a seat for the flight, I am being involentarily disembarked. I'll then leave the aircraft (before it pushes back! :rolleyes:) and let the airline sort it out

However, a year later, the same thing happened to me on a VA flight in Sept 2001 on a flight from Toronto to LGW - the cabin crew used their initiative, talked to the flight deck crew and I spent the entire flight in the flight deck of the 747-200.... :ok:

24th Jul 2006, 00:34
Wearing a sheet probably helped.

24th Jul 2006, 01:11
This is why I admire South West Airlines for their policy of requiring obese (fat slobs) passengers to purchase 2 tickets to assure room for normal sized passengers. One of the size standards is that the armrests must be down when the overweight passenger is seated.

24th Jul 2006, 04:43
I'm sure that the check-in peeps see me coming and look for the biggest slob they can find to seat beside me:mad:

Last week I flew DOH-BAH and had a big slob beside me, with a newspaper. Why is it that these :mad: feel that, in addition to taking as much of the space as possible with their body, they need to take over the space in front of me as well with arms and newspapers?

DOH-BAH is only 40 minutes (including push-back, taxi etc) so I can put up with that, but it's a different matter when I'm on a 6-hour BAH-LHR or 7-hour+ LGW-PHL. And the fat :mad: always seem to need to have their elbows stretched out to the maximum in order to be able to operate cutlery when the meal service comes around :mad: :mad:

"Pay for F-class or buy 2 Y tickets:* " (or go on a bl00dy diet)


Howard Hughes
24th Jul 2006, 07:44
Dude, I'm not fat, I'm just BIG BONED!!


24th Jul 2006, 08:22
Dude, I'm not fat, I'm just BIG BONED!!

Yeah, but if you ate less perhaps some of those bones might be a bit smaller :E

24th Jul 2006, 15:02
At many check-in counters there's a device to check the cabin baggage. Maybe it's about time to create a device to check the sizes of the passengers?

24th Jul 2006, 19:11
Two experiences on Ryanair recently. The first one, I went to sit down in my (unallocated) seat, hadn't really been watching and suddenly found myself being confronted in that row by two very large ladies who actually growled at me, with the one in the Middle seat sprawled over 2 seats and her armrest up. So I did the obvious thing and slammed the armrest down, jumped into the outside seat and promptly fell asleep - she's probably missing a kidney, but anyone who growls at fellow passengers on a Ryanair flight needs to go as unpressurised hold baggage.

Another flight shortly after, and having beaten my way to the front of the queue I took an aisle seat as is my wont, someone else came along shortly after and moved into the window seat. Just before the doors were closed, an exceedingly large girl arrived and spotted the empty middle seat which saved her having to morph down the aisle to the back. "****", says me, and lets her in. Well, fair dues to her - she poured herself into the seat with nary a whimper and zero overhang, and held that pose for over an hour. So much so that I felt like shouting at the bitch in the window seat when she decided she needed the jax half way through the flight, and we all had to dismount twice to let her out and in.

The moral of the story? You don't even notice a good big 'un, but sadly many of the others are Fattist Revoloutionaries who think that their 99 cent entitles them to more than the rest. Mind you, I suspect that some of the Ryanair hosties would be well able to herd them around if called upon - if the fat pax understood them in the first place, of course.