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handysnaks
16th Apr 2006, 16:48
:uhoh: :mad: So there I am, cooking Sunday Lunch, prime organic Hereford rib of beef (I think his name was Brian!). In a moment of ineptitude, whilst putting the par-boiled spuds in the (Very) hot fat drop a potato in with a bit more vigour than intended and splash! Now have minor burns to arm and what feels like third degree burns to lower and upper lip and eyelid (phew, my reactions were still quick enough to protect the eye!). Although I thought about going to the agony aunt forum for some sympathy. Now (after ruining a packet of frozen peas and a packet of frozen oven chips in futile attempt to minimise blistering), decided that some humour would be the best medicine. So (and I've already done all the Darwin Award references), I open to the floor.....:mad: :uhoh: :\ :{

colmac747
16th Apr 2006, 17:00
Well, it can't be that sore (you big girls blouse) if you are able to type and see what you're typing....

I have no sympathy whatsoever, and only hope you managed to get a decent vet so little Brian will be up and about in a day or two..


:}

tilewood
16th Apr 2006, 17:04
You can afford beef and you want sympathy and humour?!!

There's me, the wife, and nine kids huddled together for warmth in a
Hotpoint Fridge cardboard box, whilst granny (aged 97) is cleaning
the windows of the Millenium Dome to earn a few bob. And you are
complaining about near fatal fat burns!!

Not just ordinary beef, but prime organic Hereford rib of beef. Sounds
like an M & S advert to me!!


handysnaks: I hope you will soon be on the mend and able to enjoy the rest
of your Easter. I trust the beef was good too. I had a beef roast, it was
great!! :ok:

BlueDiamond
16th Apr 2006, 17:09
There's me, the wife, and nine kids huddled together for warmth in a Hotpoint Fridge cardboard box, whilst granny (aged 97) is cleaning the windows of the Millenium Dome to earn a few bob.
Luxury. We used to dream of livin' in a cardboard box! :rolleyes:

fmgc
16th Apr 2006, 17:13
A few weeks ago I burnt myself picking up a metal casserol lid (said lid had been in the oven for 6 hours cooking my slow roast pork....yum), it 'king hurt.

I phoned my girlfriend, who was at work, generally to take it out on her (the desire to scream and look for somebody to blame is almost overwhelming).

She recommended finding her Elizabeth Arden 8 hour cream. "Don't be silly" I said, but I thought that I was going to die so tried it, and it was amazing, after 20 mins there was no pain at all.

I can not recommend the stuff enough.

R4+Z
16th Apr 2006, 17:16
Cardboard!!!!

You expect the luxury of cardboard!

Newspaper, now that is the residence of the masses! :)

tilewood
16th Apr 2006, 17:18
fmgc: Is that the same as Elizabeth Arden [email protected] Shina?!! :cool:

tart1
16th Apr 2006, 17:22
fmgc: Is that the same as Elizabeth Arden [email protected] Shina?!! :cool:
Wow what is that?? I want some. Where can I buy it?? :O

fmgc
16th Apr 2006, 17:25
Elizabeth Arden [email protected] Shina

Dunno but is it any good for burns?

tilewood
16th Apr 2006, 17:26
tart 1: I am the sole UK agent!! :p

R4+Z
16th Apr 2006, 17:28
bet it has to be professionally applied as well. :) :) :)

fokker
16th Apr 2006, 17:31
When did Elizabeth Arden?

















When Max Factor!


I'll get me coat .................

handysnaks
16th Apr 2006, 17:37
Ahh, thanks all, like the four yorkshiremen allusions, it's nice to know somebody cares :D . M&S, tilewood, this was the best that Stratford Farmers Market can offer (The pain has been well dulled by one bottle of Marstons Double Drop and then seconds of Golden Sheep. :ooh:

Aye Colmac, I'm a great big Jessie, but I'm afraid the only person who could ease little Brians rather terminal ailment has a 'holiday' in his honour going on as I type this reply!

AerBabe
16th Apr 2006, 17:40
Try lavender oil.

Goes lovely with roasties. :E

handysnaks
16th Apr 2006, 17:54
fmgc, Elizabeth Arden, hmm nice, but it's easter and the shops are shut. I could use some of my wifes lotion I suppose, her names Dinah you know:E

Aerbabe, that's the sort of thing I'm after, witty and cruel at the same time.... I think that the scent of lavender would rather overpower the simple roast spud.

brickhistory
16th Apr 2006, 17:55
Cardboard!!!!
You expect the luxury of cardboard!
Newspaper, now that is the residence of the masses! :)

Newspaper? Luxury!
Over here, not enough folk can read, so we can only wish we had enough newsprint to cuddle up in.......empty Starbucks cups, now those make a fine windbreak!

Mac the Knife
16th Apr 2006, 18:06
Hmm.. I've spent much of the last couple of days with someone who was fixing a petrol pump. His pal decided to strike a light....

40% burns. Ouch!

He'll keep me busy for a few weeks :(

tilewood
16th Apr 2006, 18:12
Hmm.. I've spent much of the last couple of days with someone who was fixing a petrol pump. His pal decided to strike a light....
40% burns. Ouch!
He'll keep me busy for a few weeks :(


Rather puts things in perspective! :hmm:

acbus1
16th Apr 2006, 18:14
Do they do an Elizabeth Hardon 8 hour creme?

tilewood
16th Apr 2006, 18:19
Do they do an Elizabeth Hardon 8 hour creme?


Yes it's called Plaster de Paris!! :D

ShyTorque
16th Apr 2006, 19:58
Have you tried horseadish sauce? :E

On the beef, I mean.

If applied to the face, the effect would be somewhat similar to the "zing" experienced by a friend. He borrowed a MIG welding kit and unwittingly used gas welding goggles instead of the correct full-face visor whilst spending a whole weekend repairing his MGB project. :cool:

On Monday, he came into work looking like a pink negative of John Lennon. He was in agony. Oh, HOW we sympathised....... :D .

Even funnier, his wife later told me that he had got up in the night, staggered to the bathroom and applied a goodly portion of what he thought was her sunburn soothing cream to his fizzog and balding head. Turned out to be spearmint toothpaste! :eek:

Hope it hurts less tomorrow :ok:

Gouabafla
16th Apr 2006, 20:23
Even funnier, his wife later told me that he had got up in the night, staggered to the bathroom and applied a goodly portion of what he thought was her sunburn soothing cream to his fizzog and balding head. Turned out to be spearmint toothpaste!


In a reverse of the above scenario, I put anusol on my toothbrush recently - only just discovered in time. Otherwise, I could have been in piles of trouble.

ShyTorque
16th Apr 2006, 22:05
In a reverse of the above scenario, I put anusol on my toothbrush recently - only just discovered in time. Otherwise, I could have been in piles of trouble.

You aren't supposed to apply it with a brush, far too painful. :(

;)

tall and tasty
16th Apr 2006, 23:02
Ouch I say, the best thing for burns is NOT cream of any sort. You need to run the area under cooled water, not cold or you will do more damage for at least 10 mins. If the skin does not hurt and it has blisetered badly then third degree is a likelihood, you need to cover it wil a sterile dressing and go and see the docs asap especailly if it is near your eyes or anywhere where swelling can cause you to not be able to breathe. If you do not have a sterile dressing then clean cling film against it to stop the air and bugs getting to the skin.
Do not eat anything or drink anything it if is really bad as they may need to give you something.
Ok sorry the nursey bit of me is taking over, no you can all have a laugh at my expence.
I had a mouth ulcer and though the best thing to kill it off with was mouth wash. So took a massive swig out of what I though was mouth wash the brown one that beings with the words lister............... unknown to me my father just recently returned from a trip had broken his aftershave bottle and decanted it into the mouthwash bottle.:uhoh: One big swig, this time I did not swallow thank goodness and blistered gums and tongue later:{ , I had to suck ice cubs for hours after that (and yes go to the docs as my mouth was so badly swollen) but it cured the mouth ulcer:O but i won't do that in a hurry and now smell mouth wash before attempting to use it
TnT

Lon More
16th Apr 2006, 23:06
A mate of mine once mistook a bottle of Sloane's linament for vaginal lubricant. Relations between him and his wife were a bit strained I believe

colmac747
16th Apr 2006, 23:12
This stuff is good for relieving the "hotness"

http://www.westonsinternet.co.uk/images/sud24p.jpg

Best not use this stuff though:

http://www.greenearthsociety.com/eshop/images/Hemorrhoid-cream.jpg


:}

Dea Certe
16th Apr 2006, 23:37
tNt,

For those painful mouth blisters, canker sores, etc, next time try holding some Maalox or Mylanta in your mouth for a few minutes. I'm not sure what the equivalent to Maalox or Mylanta is in the UK.

It's not totally unpleasant and really will help relieve the pain and help the healing process. I'm sure it will feel much better than after-shave!

Dea :)

Wonderworld
17th Apr 2006, 06:52
A few weeks ago I burnt myself picking up a metal casserol lid (said lid had been in the oven for 6 hours cooking my slow roast pork....yum), it 'king hurt.

I phoned my girlfriend, who was at work, generally to take it out on her (the desire to scream and look for somebody to blame is almost overwhelming).

She recommended finding her Elizabeth Arden 8 hour cream. "Don't be silly" I said, but I thought that I was going to die so tried it, and it was amazing, after 20 mins there was no pain at all.

I can not recommend the stuff enough.

Ouch. That would hurt :sad:
However the idea of a 6 hour slow roast pork sounds divine. I would love the recipe if that is possible. :ok:
Thnks in anticipation

Heatseeker
17th Apr 2006, 09:05
You city people don't know zip. Get yourself an aloe vera plant and whenever things that bite, boil or blister descend upon your tender exposed bits, break off a piece and squeeze the resulting juice onto the hurting part and voila - pain gone.

It even works on mother in laws. Whenever they become painful shove a bit up their nostril and watch them instantly go home. Pain gone.

Aint nature wunnerful.

H :D :D :D

acbus1
17th Apr 2006, 09:22
A case of aloe vera, goodbye Vera?

Solid Rust Twotter
17th Apr 2006, 09:48
Dunno but is it any good for burns?

When the GF stopped screaming and the smoke had cleared she said it was pretty useful...:E

tall and tasty
17th Apr 2006, 10:50
Hmm. Now where could Mr Kyle find any such candidates? Surely no-one uses t'internet for more than 30 minutes a day do they??

I will back heatseeker on that, my brother had an aloe plant in the states and it was the most amazing little plant for healing things. I would not believe it unless I had not seen it used on sun burn

TnT :ok:

Foss
17th Apr 2006, 11:45
Managed to sunburn the top of my feet very badly out sailing, and aloe vera worked wonders.

Getting deep heat cream in your eyes, that hurts to quite a considerable degree of ouch.

Fos