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View Full Version : Another Darwin Award contender.


USE THE RUDDERS
6th Apr 2006, 08:32
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,190582,00.html

BombayDuck
6th Apr 2006, 08:35
Sadly he's only eligible for an honorable mention not the award itself.

RiskyRossco
6th Apr 2006, 08:39
First rule when dealing with unknown ordnance? Treat it as harmless!
Another reason why some people shouldn't be allowed out without supervision.

arcniz
6th Apr 2006, 08:57
First rule when dealing with unknown ordnance? Treat it as harmless!

And, for best effect, always hammer on the end with the fuse, primer, or firing cap.

acbus1
6th Apr 2006, 09:15
Some of my teachers were only slightly less entertaining.

Chemistry teacher demonstrating solid potassium (or somesuch) dropped some on his shoe. Started burning towards his foot. Tried flicking it off with a rag. Set fire to rag. Resulted in a panicked jig around the lab, trying to flick the potassium off with deft foot movements, whilst also trying to extinguish the rag.

He finally worked out that removing his shoe might be a top idea.

He seemed offended that we were all p!$$!ng ourselves. :}

Duchess_Driver
6th Apr 2006, 09:17
Obviously the lesson for that day was....

Shell scripts.



....those in the know....

Onan the Clumsy
6th Apr 2006, 12:27
...Shell scripts run on a Cannon PC

phoenix son
6th Apr 2006, 13:29
First rule when dealing with unknown ordnance? Treat it as harmless

HarmFUL, surely???:confused:

G-CPTN
6th Apr 2006, 13:32
No, you miss the point. If one discovers a hand grenade one is forced to throw it at one's friends to see if it will frighten them.
Likewise if you find a shell, one has to strike the percussion cap just to make certain that it's a dud . . .

eticket
6th Apr 2006, 13:34
Apologies if this has been done before but here is a DEA agent (http://www.firearmscoalition.org/multimedia/footshot.wmv) trying to demonstrate that you shouldn't play with guns before he puts his foot in it.:{

A visit from the local beat bobby was never like this in my schooldays.

But why is there so little reaction from the students?

Onan the Clumsy
6th Apr 2006, 13:36
No really...harmmless. If it was harmfull it wouldn't just be lying around would it?

Loose rivets
7th Apr 2006, 04:00
Some of my teachers were only slightly less entertaining.
Chemistry teacher demonstrating solid potassium (or somesuch) dropped some on his shoe. Started burning towards his foot. Tried flicking it off with a rag. Set fire to rag. Resulted in a panicked jig around the lab, trying to flick the potassium off with deft foot movements, whilst also trying to extinguish the rag.
He finally worked out that removing his shoe might be a top idea.
He seemed offended that we were all p!$$!ng ourselves. :}

Gosh, that brings back a very similar memory.

A couple of years ago I went to visit my old science teacher. He's in his 80s and quite with it still. He had been on telly and recounted a story of blowing up a Woolf bottle ( ?) with hydrogen.

"I had all sorts of luck on that day...." he told the interviewer. He certainly did, I was outside the classroom when the explosion happened. Kids were led from the room with handkerchiefs pressed against facial cuts...but there was no serious injury.

I reminded him of our night-school incident.

I had held out a lump of potassium with forceps...I glanced at him and offered it towards a Bunsen burner. He grinned and nodded. I took no further persuasion to stick it into the flame.

The flaring pieces burst over a ten squ meter area, and we all set about trying to put out the fire. I had on a pair of crepe sole swede shoes...standard issue in the fifties. I used them to dance on the multiple fires. Some other soul poured water on the fire...which worked, but left us with no clue as to where the combustible substance was.

Water was used to wash and then be moped into the sink...time and time and time again, until the floor had stopped smoking. When we felt it was safe, we all hoofed it to the dining room for a break. I sat on a counter with my legs crossed.

I was about half way through my tea when someone shouted that my shoes were on fire. Carried out well practiced fire drill.

I left my shoes on the step outside my front door. Shoes of such quality were not discarded lightly so soon after the war. Every so often over the next day or two, I used my penknife to cut a bit of smoking rubber off, but my shoes were saved.

My master listened thoughtfully to my reminiscences, and after a moment or so said. "I wish I had told that story on television, it was a lot funnier than the one I told."

He was a great guy and he saved my mind from the stultifying boredom of the 50s secondary school. His family watched t/v on a 2" green screen which was hooked up to a pile of ex military bits.

"Yes, for a time we watched it upside down." He recalled.

Like a lot of teachers, he was asked to teach for a while after the war cos of obvious shortages, and stayed the rest of his working life.

ExSimGuy
7th Apr 2006, 04:43
Many, many more of them here http://www.humormatters.com/darwin.htm

including the man who was shot by a snake

and another guy who microwaved himself to keep warm:ok:

ShyTorque
7th Apr 2006, 10:32
Oh, I laughed at the potassium story!

Our Chemistry teacher was always late for the lesson; not a good idea leaving sixth formers in charge of a chemistry lab with all the equipment and materials set out. We used to make up our own experiments to wile away the time......

A friend took a tiny piece of Potassium and stuck in in the wet sink, where it fizzed happily away. Not being satisfied, he next took a half inch cube of the stuff, threw it in the sink and turned on the tap. Steam began emitting from the sink, just as someone shouted "Scruff's coming!" (the teacher). My friend tried to flush the burning lump down the plughole, but it was too big and the steam cloud just got much larger. Beginning to panic, he threw a wet dishcloth over it. Ten seconds later, just before the teacher appeared in the doorway there was a loud report as the dishcloth exploded. The room and all of us were instantly engulfed in what appeared to be indoor firework "snow". It was in fact tiny pieces of cotton fibre, drifting down from the ceiling!

Then there was the time my cousin and I accidentally made an explosive and highly volatile material, causing the whole lab to be evacuated.....after the third successive loud explosion we all ran for it. We blamed each other...he passed me the white powdered substance. All I did was to add the conc. sulphuric acid - and wondered why it went dark brown instead of pale green as expected! As I turned to ask what he thought, it blew up the test tube and the rest of the surrounding experiment. I dropped the acid bottle onto the bench! The new "substance", previously unknown to science, exploded as soon as it formed and kept on banging away all by itself for quite some time, spraying the place with conc. acid.

I received a swift clip round the ear from another teacher, but no further action was taken as the stewards enquiry let us off the hook! Two identical jars had been mistakenly left next to each other by the lab. technician, one was a "chloride", the other being "chlorate" and my cousin brought the "other one".

Another time someone (not me, I was in Geography) knocked over the entire stack of large gas cylinders in the first floor laboratory. One cylinder hit the work bench, breaking off the valve and turning the cylinder into a missile! It set off across the floor, scattering students and thumped into the far wall, making a horrendous screeching noise and causing a gas cloud to fill the laboratory. It was then impossible to see what the cylinder actually contained. Someone shouted "HYDROGEN" and the whole school was evacuated in about a minute! Oh, how we laughed..... but it was only CO2.

Best 'A' level I did, at least as far as entertainment was concerned! :ok:

Tricky Woo
7th Apr 2006, 15:28
Wonder if he at least killed the bug. Probably not.

TW

strafer
7th Apr 2006, 15:42
My personal favourite from ExSimGuys' link:

"Derrick L. Richards, 28, was charged in April in Minneapolis with third-degree murder in the death of his beloved cousin, Kenneth E. Richards. According to police, Derrick suggested a game of Russian roulette and put a semiautomatic pistol (instead of the more traditional revolver) to Ken's head and fired."

Loose rivets
9th Apr 2006, 04:09
Oh, buggah....one is going a bit dim. What I was referring to was the stuff that needs to be in water, and smokes when exposed to oxygen. Setting fire to it seems to be a bonus.http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v703/walnaze/stirthepot.gif

The bright ones among you will have realized the bo-bo.

In my latter secondary school days, it was realized that I was good for nothing, and consequently was allowed to spend time in the science room just to keep me quiet. At some time, there was a need to put bells round the school as the old brass hand-bell was wearing out. I was put in charge of a small team.

We pulled wires round the entire old building, and powered them from the stack of car batteries in the lab. Was it Gents bells? sounds familiar. Anyway, I put up several of ‘em, and wired a metal clad bell-push outside the headmaster's door. It all worked well.

The headmaster was a 20 stone homicidal maniac...we didn't mess with him, but on the days that he was away....funny that, I wonder where he would go. "How to smash children" courses no doubt..... anyway, the deputy head took his temporary responsibilities rather seriously. At about one minute to the appointed time, he would stride from his room and stand by the bell-push. His pride and joy was a Hunter pocket watch, which he always held 18.5" from his nose. As the sweep second hand passed the -30 secs point, he would raise his hand to the button. At minus 10 secs, my mate would give the thumbs up to the next guy down the corridor. At about -3, I would apply an old metal file across the appropriated terminals. CLANG-ALANG-ALANG-ERLANG..... echoed round the school, just about the moment that he was closing on the button.

Each time we pulled this stunt, he would snap the cover of his Hunter closed, and put it away in his waistcoat pocket. When it was my turn to hide and give the thumbs up, I watched his face as he walked back to his room. It was quite expressionless. Never, ever, did he question why the bell beat him to it. I wonder what was going through his mind.

G-CPTN
9th Apr 2006, 04:45
I LIKE that sort of jape. I thought you were going to 'energise' the bell-push with electricity for the excitement of the deputy, but what you did is the sort of 'constructive' trickery that deserves medals.

multi_engined
9th Apr 2006, 06:01
Man some people are unlucky, then again... he found it in the wild...

Solid Rust Twotter
9th Apr 2006, 06:20
One appreciates subtlety, Mr Rivets. Kudos....:ok: