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N380UA
13th Mar 2006, 12:15
NEW YORK -

A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule and a calculator. At a morning press conference, Attorney General John Ashcroft said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

"Al-gebra is a problem for us," Ashcroft said. "They desire solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value. They use secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'There are 3 sides to every triangle'"

When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes." White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the president.:bored:

Unwell_Raptor
13th Mar 2006, 12:22
N380UA

Two points: Public School means the opposite in the UK to what it does in the US.

Most state (i.e. public) schools in the UK wouldn't trouble kids' heads with anything as tricky as geometry.

Lon More
13th Mar 2006, 12:24
Posted already (http://www.pprune.org/forums/showthread.php?p=2427139&highlight=school+teacher#post2427139) a week ago by BarFly