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tilewood
1st Nov 2005, 19:02
Am I the only one who dreads the onset of the 'football season'.

The hours of banal post match analysis on our TV screens. The endless 'at the end of the day, it's a game of two halves, and I'm as sick as a parrot' cliches.

The drama queens on the pitch after someone has a kicked a ball
into a net, kissing and hugging each other, or the writhing on the
ground faking a foul.

The mindless interviews with overpaid, intellectually challenged young men whose lives end up spread in lurid detail across the
pages of the more sensationalist gutter press.

Is this really sport, or just another example of exploitation
and greed?

duchy
1st Nov 2005, 19:13
Well, as a wife I HATE the 'football season'. Everytime Glasgow Rangers are playing I have to endure the endless shouting and swearing from my normally fairly mild-mannered 'other half'. I also have to rush round the house before the match closing all the windows and doors in case the neighbours hear him and then...........................if they lose.......................you would think there had been a death in the family !!!!!!!!! Beam me up Scotty!!!!

reynoldsno1
1st Nov 2005, 20:01
Rugby Football season has just end in NZ ... me and mrsr1 have post season depression......

frostbite
1st Nov 2005, 20:02
What I can't understand is that a few people, whom I previously regarded as intelligent, allow their lives and their judgement to be totally ruled by this moronic and pointless game.

G-CPTN
1st Nov 2005, 20:20
At least you know where they are . . .
. . . and can avoid them, either at St James's Park or the pubs with satellite dishes.
It seems they are always striving for a 'result'. Can 'no result' be declared, and if so, under what circumstances?

The last football event that I attended was Jackie Milburn's funeral cortege arriving at the West Road Crem. It was also the first football event that I'd attended . . .

Rollingthunder
1st Nov 2005, 20:27
There does seem to a majority of ill- educated morons in the game who can only kick a ball and get arrested for drink driving or drugs or sexual misconduct. Tossers the lot of them. Any British players left among them?

My Dad, a proper foottie player would be beside himself with these idiots.

G-CPTN
1st Nov 2005, 20:31
>My Dad, a proper foottie player would be beside himself with these idiots.

But he probably suffered brain damage from heading a leaden-weight sodden leather ball.
And all for 2s 6d

terryJones
1st Nov 2005, 20:33
Tonight there is (are?) 22 overpaid half naked idiots kicking a blown up pigskin over a field on 3 channels of my TV, and to make it worse, I think it's the same idiots on all channels...
More to the point, Men and Motors also has it on.
As an aside, someone told me the other week that it can cost over £30 to actually GO and watch a game live. I wonder if that includes a free Bovril?

Rollingthunder
1st Nov 2005, 20:43
Nah, us Manchester lads had tougher foreheads than that. You must be thinking of southern folks.

Krystal n chips
2nd Nov 2005, 05:36
As a long standing and passionate detester of the :mad: game, I echo the sentiments previously posted on :mad: "footie"--the "new religion and placebo for the unthinking masses".

TV--Switch to OFF---or--select another channel.

Newspapers----ignore.

About the only benefit I can think off should bird flu actually develop into a pandemic is that the grounds will be closed ! :ok: :E

IB4138
2nd Nov 2005, 06:42
The "madness" does not just apply to soccer devotees, the Rugby Union mob are just as daft, if not more so!:E

eal401
2nd Nov 2005, 06:46
The hours of banal post match analysis on our TV screens
Er....why do you watch then? Or are you too stupid to work the off button/change channels/go to another pub/do something that interests you?

ruled by this moronic and pointless game.
So what are your interests? Just so we can make some equally ignorant sweeping generalisations...

Signed,

A football fan capable of having other interests and avoiding things that don't interest me.

Abdel
2nd Nov 2005, 06:54
Quit moaning about footy on the telly....

If I could only watch my beloved QPR on telly.....

If they were any good they'd be on telly, but also no.


But Europe and the Premiership are excellent alternatives (or substitutes shall I say?!)

angels
2nd Nov 2005, 07:15
Totally with eal on this one.

If you don't like it, don't watch!! Simple really isn't it? Why should it take some JBers to point that out to you??

So as eal has asked, what are your hobbies?

Taildragger55
2nd Nov 2005, 08:36
[Rant mode on]Er..angels, I think the point is it so pervasive that you can't avoid it. Even if you skip the sports programmes the news is fifty percent about sport. Even my local classical radio station, the only refuge from wall-to-wall sport on Saturdays, has started to give sports results every few minutes, it seems.
I understand that a sizeable minority is interested in it, but for Jaysus sake...
[rant mode off]

Dak Mechanic
2nd Nov 2005, 08:56
I love aircraft, cars, flying, reading, history....

I also enjoy football, and living in the Midlands I'm "blessed" with a whole number of teams to follow. I grew up in Norwich so they're my team[1], but I also follow the fortunes of Coventry[2], Birmingham, Villa, West Brom etc[3].

Don't knock it! Nothing like the feeling of being in the crowd when your team scores or is on a good run.

World Cup to look forward to next year :E

JC
[1] It could be argued that "football" is too strong a word for what Norwich are playing at the moment
[2] Erm, see [1]
[3] yes ok, I think [1] applies here as well.

eal401
2nd Nov 2005, 11:55
Er..angels, I think the point is it so pervasive that you can't avoid it.
B*llocks!!! Please tell us how much football will be on TV today (2nd November 2005), then you should realise what a load of sh1te you are talking.
the news is fifty percent about sport.
Over looking this second dose of b*llocks, what percentage of the sports report is football then?
Even my local classical radio station, the only refuge from wall-to-wall sport on Saturdays, has started to give sports results every few minutes, it seems.
OMG!!!! OMG!!!!! 90 minutes, one day a week of getting the occasional result!!! OMG, how dow you avoid killing yourself in despair????

:rolleyes: :rolleyes:

G-CPTN
2nd Nov 2005, 12:43
>how dow you avoid killing yourself in despair????

By Prooning . . .


>Nothing like the feeling of being in the crowd when your team scores or is on a good run.

In contrast, drive past St James's Park when they're coming out after a defeat. Heads hung low, shoulders slumped forward, feet dragging along the ground - to a man, woman and child.
Lowry, where are you now?

Taildragger55
2nd Nov 2005, 12:48
OOOh Eal, we are getting shirty.


I do not have a vast statistical analysis of the amount of football on the news, or the proportion of that that is devoted to soccer, because I reach for the remote as soon as it appears.

But there= is too bloody much.:yuk:

Jerricho
2nd Nov 2005, 13:03
OOOh Eal, we are getting shirty.

Ask him has he had any good photos taken of his car of late by those nice speed cameras

:E :E

Groundloop
2nd Nov 2005, 13:36
Tilewood, You are a right lucky b*gger if, for you, the footie season only starts in November. I've had to put up with it for nearly 3 months already!!

Little Blue
2nd Nov 2005, 16:07
As my father once said to me....
"Son, never EVER trust a man who doesn't like football "

eal401
2nd Nov 2005, 21:52
Ask him has he had any good photos taken of his car of late by those nice speed cameras
To which the answer would be "No, what the hell has that got to do with anything?"

:confused:

None of the above
5th Nov 2005, 07:33
A wonderfully splenetic article by Giles Coren appeared in The Times in October 2003:

A CHARITY called Roadpeace has criticised the Transport Department for collaborating with the Football League in a road safety campaign, because footballers are such demonstrably bad and dangerous drivers. If footballers are committed to road safety, says the group, “they should lead by example and drive small, safe cars and make a commitment not to speed and to drive safely”.

Hmmm. I’m just trying to picture it. I’m trying to see a 19-year-old wunderscally celebrating his £40 million move to Manchester United (in a deal that gives him £200,000 a week, plus three helicopters and as many go-go-dancing Danish virgins as he can eat) by going out and buying a brand new Ford Ka. Or Honda Civic. Or Seat Ibiza (with cigarette lighter and passenger-side vanity mirror).

I’m trying to see the front page of Hello! screaming its exclusive photos of “David Beckham at home in Madrid with his stunning collection of economical yet surprisingly capacious one-litre hatchbacks”.

I’m trying to see headlines like: “Premiership star arrested for driving too slowly on dual carriageway in hydrogen-powered eco-buggy” and “Dwight Yorke prangs bicycle again — basket irreparable.” And I’m having a bit of trouble.

A typical example of the way footballers think about cars was the response of Les Ferdinand, Ferrari collector and occasional scorer of fluky goals with his knee, to an interviewer who asked him if he was a safe driver. “I drive fast, but safely,” Ferdinand said, missing the point of safe driving as howlingly as ever he missed a sitter in the six-yard box with the scores level in extra time and the keeper lying unconscious on the touchline.

But Ferdinand just wasn’t going to say: “Yes, I drive well within the limits of human reaction time, taking my lead from prevailing road conditions. I know my stopping distances by heart, always wear a seatbelt, and am so averse to high speeds that I could get a nosebleed taking a sharp corner in a milk float.” Because if he did, he would get no respect from his pig-ignorant, villainous, oafish peers.

Footballers are witless, illiterate, spoilt morons who are no good at driving because they are no good at anything at all, except, very occasionally, playing football, and then only if they are French. They can’t speak, they can’t read, they need Sun journalists (God help them) to write their autobiographies for them, they can’t hold their alcohol, they can’t have a relationship with a woman without beating her, they can’t remember to show up at a drugs test unless their mummy takes them, they can’t organise a strike properly or avoid injury before big internationals, and they can’t tell a well-cut suit from an empty pantomime horse.

Footballers are the apogee of the modern British male as fêted by men’s magazines, late-night television programming and advertisers of almost every stripe — for they understand only money, lewdness and brutality. They converse in the vulgar patois of cars, tits and speed. For Christ’s sake, these people think that Graeme LeSaux is gay because he reads The Guardian. What would they do if he bought a VW Beatle?

The sportswriter Brian Glanville has been knocked about for explaining the problems encountered by some footballers in a radio interview in the following terms: “They have very little education and then suddenly these uneducated boys are projected into a world in which they are earning £40,000 or £50,000 a week; there are no controls.”

The uproar was because Brian was talking about black players, but the degeneracy of footballers has nothing to do with race or environment. All footballers are scumbags. Black, white, or yell— no, wait, those Japanese and Korean chaps at the World Cup were rather marvellous. They probably had degrees.

But Roadpeace is right. Footballers should be stopped from driving their stupid sports cars. Not because of the bad example they set in the field of road safety but because of the bad example they set in everything.

In the days when footballers only very occasionally became famous it did not matter that they were without exception vain, crass and moronic. The odd George Best or Charlie Nicholas came to the fore, but the rest we saw only occasionally, clumping around in the mud on a Saturday afternoon. Now that all footballers are famous, something has to be done.

So, yes, ban them from owning fast cars. But ban them also from living in gated mock-Tudor estates, ban them from going to nightclubs, ban them from spitting, ban them from beating up Asian students, ban them from saying “as I say” all the time, ban them from buying Versace frock coats and ties the same colour as their shirts, ban them from owning vast plasma-screen televisions and Bang & Olufsen stereos but no books, ban them from keeping pedigree dogs called “Prince” and “Lady”, ban them from calling their children “Dene” and “Chenille”, ban them from going out with ropey peroxided media tarts, and ban them from punching them, ban them from listening to soul music, ban them from writing naff messages on their vests and then tearing off their shirts in public, ban them from doing their special “celebrations” and then explaining them to the press afterwards, ban them from using the historic present tense, wearing jewellery and raping young women, from taking bungs and dyeing their hair and calling people “gaffer”.

Lock them up and let them out only on Saturdays, when it is time for them to perform, like the depraved, venal, punch-drunk circus animals they are.

Not much to add, really.......... :ok:

eal401
5th Nov 2005, 10:16
Footballers are witless, illiterate, spoilt morons who are no good at driving because they are no good at anything at all, except, very occasionally, playing football, and then only if they are French. They can’t speak, they can’t read, they need Sun journalists (God help them) to write their autobiographies for them, they can’t hold their alcohol, they can’t have a relationship with a woman without beating her, they can’t remember to show up at a drugs test unless their mummy takes them, they can’t organise a strike properly or avoid injury before big internationals, and they can’t tell a well-cut suit from an empty pantomime horse.

And all this from a man who's main job is getting paid for eating in restaurants!! Hahahahaha!!

Flyrr100
5th Nov 2005, 11:54
I love the footy on TV. As a long time Chelsea fan it's so nice to see the Blues finally getting somewhere. And I live in Orlando, FL. We have the Fox Soccer Channel. Channel 128. And I love it!
My wife puts up with it. She's American and can't see the point of the game. But I have to endure the Miami Dolphins and the Jacksonville Jaguars in their pads and helmets. I think they're probably all girls under that armour.
My neighbor is from Sunderland (no comment). So at least I have someone to watch the footy with.

Astrodome
5th Nov 2005, 12:21
As my father once said to me...."Son, never EVER trust a man who doesn't like football " The following like football (just to name two), there are more of the same ilk :-

Alister Campbell

Bliar

You would trust them ?

None of the above
5th Nov 2005, 13:12
Little Blue

Quote:
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
As my father once said to me...."Son, never EVER trust a man who doesn't like football "
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

To be mistrusted by a football fan isn't exactly the world's worst insult.

N o t a......:ok:

jindabyne
5th Nov 2005, 14:20
Turn all football grounds into allotments I say.

IB4138
5th Nov 2005, 14:44
Quite the reverse.....there are a lot of allotments that, when joined together would make excellent football pitches...or rugby pitches or cricket grounds..etc :E

eal401
6th Nov 2005, 14:52
Just lighten up and stop whinging.. Perhaps one day there might
be something really worth whinging about.

C130 Techie
6th Nov 2005, 17:35
None of the Above

Absolutely spot on.

Sure its easy to turn off the TV at home and ignore the junk in the papers. However it seems that every other pub now has a large screen TV showing the moronic game with the volume up so you can't hear yourself think.

Also it's not so easy to avoid the hordes of scarf waving, beer swilling morons in the town centres on a Saturday afternoon.

tart1
6th Nov 2005, 17:48
I was avoiding this thread because I thought it would be about football and how wonderful it was and the scores and the matches, etc, etc. :yuk: :yuk:

It is wonderful to find so many other people who don't particularly like football.

I think it is a case of live and let live - I think I am a very tolerant person generally - but it really hacks me off that TV coverage of sport is so football-dominated and the sports section of the newspaper is full of ...... guess what? It is as if there is no other sport in the world sometimes.

Navajo8686
6th Nov 2005, 18:32
Football is one of those things that unless you are one of those who love it you'll never understand the passion it generates. There's the pride in following 'your' team through their ups and downs as well as the 'playing by proxy' when you almost become the player.......

It's also very difficult to explain what it is that is so great about it!

Unless you've been there and cheered (or cried if you follow Birmingham City :O ) you'll never get it!

Nav

Now discovered I need to pop out and get a life before the shops shut