View Full Version : Serious:what do women use baby oil for

captain cumulonimbus
4th Sep 2005, 22:58
something thats puzzled me for a long while...went away with my girlfriend (at the time),a few months ago.i was sort of going through her toiletries bag,in search of a band aid,and amongst the usual girlie things,i was surprised to find baby oil.what is this used for,apart from the obvious? i'm being dead serious here,i have no sister to ask and if i ask my mum i'm scared its used for some wierd sexual thing or something,which wouldnt go down well... thanks!

Onan the Clumsy
4th Sep 2005, 22:59
i was sort of going through her toiletries bag,in search of a band aid
Riiiiiiiiight :hmm:

captain cumulonimbus
4th Sep 2005, 23:04
i actually WAS! what else would i do it for???

Cut my nose shaving actually.i'm being dead serious here.

4th Sep 2005, 23:05
Everybody uses baby oil on their moving parts otherwise we'd all go around squeeking. Wher' ya been mate?!

PS. I know it's made from babies but I'm not sure what sort of babies. Does anyone know?

captain cumulonimbus
4th Sep 2005, 23:07
she had no moving parts,she was frigid as a witch's nipples

4th Sep 2005, 23:08
Captain C,

You seriously need to get a girlfriend or at least an overnight in BKK.
Otherwise, I'm sure that Johnson's would have the required effect that eyedrops used to have in a stressful L1-narky f/d - pax situation, alternatively if the Captain's really stressed (and a bit of a hunnie) it's always good CRM to give him a rub-down in his suite later.....

Onan the Clumsy
4th Sep 2005, 23:09
she was frigid as a witch's nipples Maybe she just knows you've been out porking your mate's girlfriend

captain cumulonimbus
4th Sep 2005, 23:12
we broke up a few months ago...SHE was busy porking two guys in her office,so it kind of cancels things out.The other girl isnt my mates girlfriend,yet,hes just after her.Still dont know what baby oil is for...?

4th Sep 2005, 23:18
not for lubrication guys!

maybe moisturisation as it's great for that, even good as a make up remover if you're pushed. Also good for massage, but there are better things on the market for getting up to no good


captain cumulonimbus
4th Sep 2005, 23:26
thanks helli gurl ! i suspected it was something like makeup remover.As for moisturisation,she used some stuff i thought was cake icing,but turned out to be "body shop body butter"...smelled lovely.God i miss her so much!:{

i think i should call her and ask what she uses it for sometime...its really perplexed me for about four months now.i know little about female toilet habits really,being single and lonely.

4th Sep 2005, 23:58
Girly-girls do have a propensity to excite the male "fleshly lusts", what with their pre-occupation with "smellies". And baby oil, in all its parochial banality, achieves the same effect as Chanel, when applied in the appropriate situation
. . . post-jacuzzi. . . candles. . . jasmine and sandalwood oil in one of they oil-into-water-and-set-over-small-flame-to-heat . . warm towels. . . (washable) sheepskin rug. . . :ok:

5th Sep 2005, 00:07
After waxing (eg legs or bikini line), the wax which sometimes gets left behind on the skin can be removed with baby oil. Hope that helps.

Onan the Clumsy
5th Sep 2005, 01:29
or boiling water


5th Sep 2005, 02:36
They use it to shampoo their HooHaa, it makes it more manageable.

5th Sep 2005, 02:39

That some stupid Bangkok dog or sumfink?

5th Sep 2005, 02:40
Baby oil's rubbish for that.

What the hell were you doing shaving your nose? :}

5th Sep 2005, 02:57
Talking of HooHaas and Bangkok Dogs. Why do all those beautiful girls you see at night disappear in the daytime? ;)

Maybe the baby oil dries out or something... :}

5th Sep 2005, 03:06
why is Onan always second to reply to a **** off topic?:E


5th Sep 2005, 10:03
Talking of shaving, four or five drops of baby oil rubbed into your wet beard produces the smoothest and by far and away the cheapest shave you will ever have. A small bottle has lasted me several years! If you add as few drops of Tea-Tree oil or somesuch to the bottle then you even have a ready applied antiseptic (good for the noses) as well as a pleasant fragrance. I haven't spent money on shaving foams, creams or whatevers for about 25 years. It also extends the life of the razor blade!

captain cumulonimbus
5th Sep 2005, 13:14
"what the hell were you doing shaving your nose?"

um,syllogism ,um,i was actually attempting to shave normally,but we'd got in to the hotel at around 2am,and,early riser that i am,was up at 7,attempting to tidy myself up.she was asleep,duvet over her (:mad: damned) head,and i really didnt want to wake her up on the 1st day of our holiday with an early A.M bloodbath,hence the shaving accident and search for a plaster.i dont know what i would have done with it really,would look a real idiot with a bandaid on my nose but at 7am after a rough night,it was the best i could think of.

None of the above
5th Sep 2005, 18:54
I've always used baby oil on the mane and tail of my old horse. It helps reduce tangling
and makes combing/brushing easier.
As a gent now in his......... er........ 'middle years'...... the reaction of the sales staff at the chemist's when handed industrial quantities of the stuff for wrapping, can be quite entertaining.

Onan the Clumsy
5th Sep 2005, 18:57
why is Onan always second to reply to a **** off topic? [:8]

Technically, first to reply, second in the thread


i really didnt want to wake her up on the 1st day of our holiday with an early A.M bloodbath,hence the shaving accident and search for a plaster. You should have used one of those really big bandaids they carry, the ones with Light Days written on them



captain cumulonimbus
5th Sep 2005, 22:27
Onan ,she had those with her too,but i look dumb enough as it is,i dont think walking around with a tampon up my nose would do much to add to my attractiveness:cool:

None of the above ,my ex girlfriend,as much as i now dislike her,was NOT a horse.I saw pretty much all of her and im certain she didnt have a mane or tail.:}

5th Sep 2005, 22:52
But Capt CB, you've still not explained how you cut your nose shaving!

5th Sep 2005, 23:03
SHE was busy porking two guys in her office

I thought you said she was frigid?
Sounds to me like she brought that baby oil along for a reason.


captain cumulonimbus
5th Sep 2005, 23:04
I had had about two hours sleep the night before,i was :mad: and i didnt have my contact lenses in (and YES,i fly with them so dont worry!),so i kind of missed the upper lip and nicked the left nostril.You'd be surprised how much blood there is in your nose!

this has nothing whatsoever to do with what women use baby oil for,the real enigma in this thread.but i'm flattered you all care about how i cut my nose.you care more than she did.

And HEMAC,she was only frigid with me,she is ,i believe,quite a goer with the lads in her office.I got very little in the way of action that weekend,though it may have been due to other biological factors,without being too graphic.

6th Sep 2005, 00:03
What do women use baby oil for?
Well if you don't use it, apparently the placenta when being fried, sticks to the frying pan!


Atlas Shrugged
6th Sep 2005, 00:08
If you put a bottle or two in your exhaust manifold, makes great smoke for aero's - either that or cotton oil

6th Sep 2005, 05:55
I'm intrigued by the idea of rubik101 using Johnson's as shaving cream, then walking around all day smelling like a baby... :ooh:

6th Sep 2005, 07:00
Isn't making baby oil cruel to babies?

6th Sep 2005, 12:28
baby oil is used in our household to clean all the stainless steel appliances in the kitchen!!!!! Does a marvellous job, even if I say so myself!!!;)

tall and tasty
6th Sep 2005, 12:44
baby oil is used in our household to clean all the stainless steel appliances in the kitchen!!!!!

Glad someone else uses it for that too. Brings it up beautifully.

Oh I also use it for makeup remover, rub into the nail bed on your fingers, on wet skin locks in moisture and on babies


Onan the Clumsy
6th Sep 2005, 13:25
apparently the placenta when being fried, sticks to the frying pan! Not necessary though if sauted in a light lemmon butter white wine sauce and garnished with shallots, spring carrots and a juliene of potatoes.

Like Marmite, it's full of vitamin B :8

6th Sep 2005, 13:48
Is this why yer ex-GF used Baby Oil? (http://community.webshots.com/album/131387405MuUvky) :p :ok:

EDIT: Onan, know anything about this coming from TEX yerself?:E

6th Sep 2005, 13:59
I'm female and I've never used it in my life.

Could be to do with the fact it has the word 'baby' on it.

6th Sep 2005, 14:41
As you get such a very close shave, the oil is all gone! Besides, I smell faintly of Tea Tree oil which is not unpleasant.

6th Sep 2005, 14:49
Tea tree oil may not be unpleasant, but it doesn't half get up yer nose don't it?! ;)

6th Sep 2005, 14:52

The idea is to rub it upon your face where you intend to shave -- not sniff it!!

Sniffing said oil may make this a somewhat hazardous event and you could end up with a bleeding nose or missing eyebrows or even a runway on your chest!

:8 :p

captain cumulonimbus
6th Sep 2005, 23:05
well thanks for al those fascinating insights.I'm still tempted to ask her,but since she hardly talks to me it might come out of left field:)

6th Sep 2005, 23:30
I like it smeared all over my t*ts and rubbed gently in!

Oooh sorry. I mean I use it to remove my eye make-up. :uhoh: :E

6th Sep 2005, 23:35
Well tart1, if it's good enough to look after babies skin I'm sure it's good enough for slightly older children, tots, call 'em what you will. :hmm:

Sorry to rub it in... geddit?... Cb but maybe if you'd dived right in and come up with some novel and lascivious ideas of your own for its usage there and then she still would be talking to you.... or have castrated you. :rolleyes:

7th Sep 2005, 05:55
whatever they use it for i'd like to help :E

7th Sep 2005, 07:13
Oh Dear tart1, you've really blown it this time... :E

I'm afraid that vision has forced me to stop what I was doing and go for a limp around the block. In the rain. Until it wears off...

7th Sep 2005, 19:19

Would it help if rubbd on your nose after you cut it shaving?


Interesting thought...I may ponder that for several...weeks.

I am intregued now...Can someone please answer the question...What do they use it for???????

7th Sep 2005, 19:32
I've already told you .............................TO CLEAN THE KITCHEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:bored: :rolleyes:

captain cumulonimbus
7th Sep 2005, 21:31
this is more intriguing than the time i walked in on...um...than last wimbledon final.:cool:

By the way i asked her,and she said she uses it to "pleasure herself" ...hmmm...or was that just another one of those daydreams i have in the cruise...:cool:

7th Sep 2005, 22:05
By the way i asked her,and she said she uses it to "pleasure herself"

The oil or the bottle? Maybe both! The mind boggles.
What do they use it for?


7th Sep 2005, 22:17
Everybody....let it slide.