View Full Version : Mistakes I have made on the road.

Onan the Clumsy
2nd Sep 2005, 21:30
When I lived in Blackpool, i was at a red light waiting to turn right when I thought "I'll turn left instead". I changed lanes then happened to glance in my rear view mirror.

Imagine my surprise when I noticed an older sad faced gentleman shaking his head rythmically. his lips may even have been pursed.

In mitigation, I was 17 at the time m'lud.

2nd Sep 2005, 21:44
One day I was pottering along the motorway at about 90 doing the Sun crossword, when suddenly I made a mistake.

And the Sun's normally really easy.


2nd Sep 2005, 22:17
Giving the one fingered salute to someone who had a gun in their car !!

Onan the Clumsy
2nd Sep 2005, 22:35
One day I was pottering along the motorway at about 90 doing the Sun crossword, when suddenly I made a mistake. Isn't the Sun the one with simple and cryptic clues that have the same answers? That's a good way to learn cryptic.


2nd Sep 2005, 22:54
Forgetting that your mate's car is on the driveway when backing up:\ :\ :\



2nd Sep 2005, 23:08
Working on car on driveway. Set off to do a road test. Forgot dog was tied to a 12 foot rope on towbar until he swung out on a corner :eek:

tony draper
2nd Sep 2005, 23:29
I seem to recal Mr Wholigan did a goodun.
Stopped in a torrential downpour once and offered to help a obviously distressed lady change a wheel on her mini, three quarters of a hour later soaked to the skin, hands covered in cuts and grazes one left her with her wheel unchanged and a wheel brace bent double, one felt a right whelk.
"Sorry missus yer have to call the garage out"
Got a bollicking for being late as well.

3rd Sep 2005, 04:58
Driving along and belatedly realising that the lights you just went through were RED....shit!!! No ticket as yet. And still alive.

3rd Sep 2005, 08:15
Went into town and spent an hour or so driving around accomplishing chores etc. and turned right at a set of lights.....Mrs SD shouts "That was a RED light!!", Me "What? so? - Oh shit!!!:ooh:" you see I had been doing the same thing for the last hour and niether of us had noticed:O

......You see I had just the previous night returned from a 4week long trip to the US.....:\

3rd Sep 2005, 11:03
First day with my shiny new licence, flying down a back road at a mad speed, nearly having a head-on accident because of a cretin double-parking.
After that, I did not drink anything at all, have the radio on, nor smoke whilst I was driving for a couple of years.

Falling half-asleep at the wheel. Stopped that after a friend was claimed by someone on the non-existent autopilot.

Driving when well over the limit - as everyone did in those days.

All these bad habits disappeared when I changed from urban motoring to Autobahn driving and seeing wreckage from time to time. It's about time that simulators were built and deployed to complement on-the-road driving experience before issuing and renewing licences.


Conan the Librarian
3rd Sep 2005, 11:59
Long time ago... A friend's dad had just bought a new Leyland Sherpa van for his thriving little business and took it to the garage for the first full tank of fuel. He placed the nozzle into the tank, which was on the opposite side from his car and then realising that the van was a diesel, as opposed to his petrol car, went to check that he was at the right pump.

Under slight pressure from his delightful lady wife who was proclaiming her embarassment at being seen in anything less than a Rolls Royce, his poor brain fogged up. Seeing that he had wrongly selected a petrol pump, he got in to move the van to the correct pump. He forgot to remove the nozzle and when driving off, ripped half of the side out, along with lifting the pump from its concrete base. The insurers must have loved him...

It must follow in the family, because a few months after, his son Andy, passed his driving test and to celebrate, drove into Newcastle under Lyme, to get the latest David Bowie album. Silly sod went home on the bus... and it was only when his mum asked "Where is the car?" that he twigged.

Andy Hughes, where are you now I wonder?


3rd Sep 2005, 12:07
...is now so chronic, at a blind junction, you have to give that extra second or two when moving away, and always look right ( death side ) and then left ( severely injured side ) before crossing a junction. Night driving in London has become anarchistic !

New tourist slogan for London...

LondOFF - come and wallow in shit !


The flying Shiite !

Farmer 1
3rd Sep 2005, 17:24
Bought a Vauxhall.

Drove it.

3rd Sep 2005, 19:04
Many years ago, when I had not long been riding my motorbike. Was riding along a motorway and managed to half-undertake a car. Said car drops back and proceeds to honk its horn at me, so I'm sitting there feeling sheepish and figuring the car is annoyed because I was being a bit silly.

Car continues to honk at me all the way down the road, even when we both left the motorway, and not until about 10 minutes later did I figure out it was trying to tell me my topbox was lying open... :oh: :\