Management Speak

[DSAT Man]

New Staish, new broom, and a stirring speech from him denouncing the accursed management speak that has invaded the military. He wants a return to the martial ambience that will remind us of our heritage and current role. So far, so good.

All lodger units ( a term I have understood ever since I joined up 20 years ago) are now to be called 'supported component capabilities'.

:yuk:

So there. I'll get my cloak.

[Incipient Sinner]

It all started to go wrong with the 'Engineering Secretariat' at Leuchars. What was wrong with Eng Wg HQ and Eggs, Chips and Peas ??

[Art Field]

Well you could go back to 1960 when they changed Wireless Warfare to Electronic Warfare at Signals Command and upset all those boffins.. "Signals Command" at Medmenham, there's another story.

[soddim]

It is, I believe, a well known trait of man to react to each new situation by reorganising and renaming existing functions. The resulting confusion and workload takes everybody's attention from the new situation and completely removes any temptation to deal with it effectively.

If in doubt - reorganise.

[Roland Pulfrew]

Does anyone have a copy of the definition of reorganisation as allegedly written by a Roman? Commander. IIRC it ends something along the lines soddim's post. If genuine it is as apt today as it was several hundred years ago. Must have a dig around my amusing anecdotes collection to see if I can find it!!:D :D

Management speak in the military? Inappropriate b:mad: ks!!

[VP959]

Ahhhhhhh...... Support Command Signals HQ, Medmenham, the place where one started one's career. Fond memories of a distant age...................

[Elmlea]

I went into some unit recently; and they had the usual big wooden board with lots of photos of important people in the lobby.

There was the usual "OC This" and "OC That," plus "Station Commander RAF Wherever."

Then, looking up to Air rank level, instead of "CinC," or the suchlike, there was an AVM listed as the "Chief Executive" of some group.

We don't have a Commander in Chief, or an Air Officer Commanding... it's now a Chief Executive.

Is this so he can introduce himself better on a business card at some meeting in a leather-sofaed club somewhere?

[handysnaks]

Does anyone have a copy of the definition of reorganisation as allegedly written by a Roman? Commander. IIRC it ends something along the lines soddim's post. If genuine it is as apt today as it was several hundred years ago. Must have a dig around my amusing anecdotes collection to see if I can find it!!

"We trained hard - but it seemed every time we were beginning to form up into teams we would be re-organised, I was to learn later in life that we tend to meet any new situation by re-organising, and a wonderful method it can be for creating the illusion of progress, while producing confusion, inefficiency and demoralisation"
- Gaius Petronius A.D. 56
:D

[adr]

I once wondered why a smirk crossed briefly over people's faces when I referred to the place where people worked the photocopier and some other equipment as "the print room."

I found out later it was because my predecessor had insisted it be referred to as "the reprographics facility."

adr

[Roland Pulfrew]

handysnaks

Thank you, that's the one!:D

[Yeller_Gait]

IIRC, and it is only in the last couple of weeks that I think I heard it, that here on the farm there is no longer going to be your NATO standard Eng, Ops and Admin Wings making up an RAF station, but because of the changing world situation and expeditionary warfare blah, something is going to change.

Unfortunately by this stage I had switched off, because I have no recollection of what, if anything, is going to change. Now obviously, something is going to change, because it always does, so anyone any ideas?

Perhaps Admin Wg is going to be dis-established, because now that we are an expeditionary warfare unit (RAF), and traditionally they have always shirked anything that does not involve 9-5, Monday to Friday, they should be prime candidates for the chop? Oh .... hang on, reality is kicking in, its Ops Wg for the chop because it costs too much to go flying and drop bombs etc.

Back to the original point though, can someone please remind me what is changing?

We don\'t have a Commander in Chief, or an Air Officer Commanding... it\'s now a Chief Executive.

That will be a Support Command Unit then, Elmlea

[Incipient Sinner]

It's quite true, admin wing may be for the 'chop' but the real question is...
Would anyone notice.
:rolleyes:

[teeteringhead]

And can it be true that "basket weavers" are now "Force Development"?????


.... er ..... yes it is :(

[Red Line Entry]

Before you pin a copy of the quotation up on the wall, you ought to know that it's a hoax. Although a man named Petronius did exist; he was a satirist in the Roman empire at the time of Nero. A lot of his writings have survived, but the quotation isn't one of them. It was invented back in the 1940s or 50s. The precise origin is obscure, but it's certain that the quotation didn't exist prior to the second World War.

Doesn't stop it being relevant though!

[Climebear]

It's quite true, admin wing may be for the 'chop' but the real question is...

My understanding that Admin Wg and the post End-to End Eng Wg could be merged to form a Sp Wg.

As for anyone noticing if Admin Wg disappeared (and trying not to bite but failing) well I suppose not; however, the singlies wouldn't be fed or housed, no one would be paid (albeit that their pay is mucked up - but alt least its better than nothing); no Gym facilities (mind you no fitness test either); no medical and dental facilities so when your broken you stay broken; no bars/messes etc. No one to maintain the buildings and operating services for the ac (not that the aviators who run the show believe that you need money to maintain these things). So no - no one would notice.

OK, so I bit.

[Blacksheep]

Bomber Command bombed; Fighter Command fought; Transport Command transported; Coastal Command despite their name, did fly out of sight of land; Balloon Command went up; Maintenance Command fixed things, Training Command taught everybody else a lesson. We all really knew what we were doing in those days in the world's finest flying club.

Then Strike Command went on strike, Air Support Command held everything up and it was all down hill from then on.

No matter where, no matter when, the good old days were always best. Ask anyone. ;)

[BEagle]

With the closure of so many RAF aerodromes, it's interesting to note that there was once an 'Airfield Construction Branch'.

Whereas nowadays, perhaps the Ministry of Defence is the 'Airfield Destruction Branch'!

[egbt]

VP959

Ahhhhhhh...... Support Command Signals HQ, Medmenham, the place where one started one's career. Fond memories of a distant age...................

Quite so, not the same ring to it as HQ38 Group but a lovely location and a good time was had by all - especially at the close down ball. :E :O

Not the same after the move to Benson (noisy a/c and the Queenies as well). Fortunately I just missed the 1982 change to RAFSEE and the move to Henlow as that was the end of my RAF career.

[teeteringhead]

HQ38 Group ...90 Group for signals surely ....

and wasn't it called something like SCSHQ (Support Command Signals HQ???) when at Benson ... was always known as Schweppes......

[egbt]

memoey fades, I think it changed to SCSHQ (yes Schweppes) in the early 70's before I arrived early in 75 and kept that name when it moved to Benson, early 77?

The RAFSEE designation was for the new combined unit at Henlow which I think started to form around easter 82, certainly the preperation was well underway when I left in Nov 81.

[Gainesy]

Slightly divergent.

The recent decision by the Defence Logistics Organisation (after trade union pressure applied) to have an in-house team run against two outside, civilian consortia to take over the supply chain was a bit bizarre, however, the DLO team won so this principle might also be applied to the Defence Training Review. End of creeping civilianisation?

Back on sandbag, swings lamp.

Anybody remember Bricks & Sticks? General Workshop? DDT Mossie sprays:yuk: ? That disgusting collection of old inter-connected shanties at Lyneham called Gateway(?) Hotel?

[Art Field]

Those with memories of Medmenham might be interested to know that the Officers Mess is now a very up-market hotel called Danesfield House(I think), costs an arm, a leg and a couple of extra bits, just to walk through the door. The huts out back have gone though so I am told by one of my, far better off than me, children.

[Climebear]

Gainesy

I seem to remeber taht the wonderful facility at Lyneham was called the Route Hotel (to distinguish it from the not quite 5 star Gaterway Hotel at BZN). Spent many a night there in prep for 5(AB) Bde exercises hiding SLRs under the matresses while we bogged off down to the NAAFI for a pint or 3. (security was a dirty word)

[C130 Techie]

That disgusting collection of old inter-connected shanties at Lyneham called Gateway(?) Hotel?

They still stand although thankfully almost all disused now though one of them still houses the S.A.T range

[Gainesy]

Climebear,
Route Hotel it is/was. Had the misfortune to have to stay in both and the one at BZN was also grotty, but not as bad.

What is an SAT Range, Tech?

[Bob Viking]

Small Arms Trainer.
It's a computerised rifle range that allows standard target shooting and scenario based shoots. Like a bloody big arcade game, but you don't have to pay a pound for a 30 second game!
BV:}

[The Maintainer]

Gainsey

If the DLO won with its in-house bid, it doesn't mean the end of creeping civilianisation - it just means the civilians will be civil servants, not contractors...

The Route Hotel at Lyneham is the worst Service accommodation I have ever stayed in - I would prefer a tent at the end of the runway at some sandy sh**hole over it any day! In comparison, the Gateway was 5*!

[Blacksheep]

"Gateway House" is of course at Brize and despite four years there, I never had the pleasure of crossing the threshold. Got stuck in the "Route Hotel" for almost two weeks though, hand carrying a Watts Datum Compass from Changi to The Admiralty Compass Observatory at Reading. Boarding priority was too low to get assigned to a flight. They were moving huge numbers of Pongoes to somewhere or other, mostly Scottish infantry - Oh God the horror of it! It still gives me the heeby-jeebies. In the end they bussed me direct to Brize to board a "luxury" flight on a VC10.

Then there was the "Blue Spitoon" in Gan with its own private joke - reception was only manned during aircraft transits so they had a "Please Ring For Service" bell push at reception. It wasn't connected up and didn't do anything. I was stuck there for two weeks as well, after doing a routine "unscheduled engine change" on a Belfast. Witnessed an interesting real blood and teeth punch up between a Shackleton Skipper and a VC10 Captain over crew accommodation and air conditioning. How the guys managed a whole year there I can never understand. No wonder they were all quite mad and communicated in their own private gibberish - most things were I remember, either not having or gizzit.

At least Changi had the honesty to identify their own hell hole as the "Transit Hotel" and the delights of Changi Village were just outside the door...

[Lima Juliet]

Management Speak - what else could you expect to be introduced by a very non-operational pilot chief (also known as 'the sink') - he couldn't exactly stir you with operational tales of daring do, could he???

LJ:D

[whowhenwhy]

For SAT range, now read small-arms Dismounted combat learning device or other such b00l0cks. Sorry wasn't really paying attention, just shot stuff!