Good recoverys ?.

[ragspanner]

Anyone been on any good recoverys ?. Ideally with not to much technical detail !
Something along the lines of ," & when i woke up in the morning ,what a headache & as for the Kangarilla pig in bed next to me !".
I need a morale inject,the more sordid the better,extra points for police involvement !.

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A wise man thinks all that he says,a fool says all that he thinks.

[Denzil]

In my experience Airline recovery's are all work and no play, RAF recovery's are a different story!!!! I never forget the girl with the gappy teeth at Machrahanish (spelling as bad as her looks)and what my mate took home as a momento from her friend!!!

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"Noted With Thanks"

[Blacksheep]

Ahhhh Macrihanish!

"Yer can buy me beer arl neet, but ye'll no get maaah **** thet easy!"

Delightful ladies on the Mull aren't they?

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Through difficulties to the cinema

[troioi01]

A few years ago I went to the Canaries to recover a 757, (Radial Drive Shaft).
We were supposed to be back pretty quickly but as often happens it turned into an overnighter. As we had no spare clothes we all trooped into the nearest shop to buy shorts and knotted hankies. Man we looked cool when we hit the Disco's. One of the guys got so "confused" after drinking gallons of San Mig, he was accosted by a gang of teenage girls. They stole his money and scarpered. He spent the whole night in a police van checking out teenage girls, in the vain hope of recovering his wallet.
When I finally arived back at the Hotel I crashed about 03.00, only to wake up half an hour later busting for a wizz.
Again in the confusion caused by a very hard days work (not to mention several gallons of Sangria), I managed to find myself locked out of my room, by this time my back teeth were swimming.
To add to my problems I was also boll**k naked.
I subsequently had to relieve myself in a Fire Bucket and still naked, go to reception for them to let me back in the room.
By this time I did not care that the foyer was full of people returning from a night out.
What I did care about, when we finally left the next day, was that most of the people who were laughing at my antics in reception, were also passengers on my flight home.
Please tell me again, why is it that we engineers are not respected.

No 1 of an occasional series.

[jetfueldrinker]

Troi,

That is the best one I have ever heard! Epic! Just remind me never to go out drinking with you ever! By the way, do you ever go to The Park or The King Billy in Kempston?

[morroccomole]

This is not a story about a recovery, but one of a similar nature about an incident that took place on the 1st night of a 18 month detachment to a European capital.There we all were, about 8 engineers, enjoying the delights of xxxxxx's famed ********** *****. In one particular bar (********* ****) there was a 'lady' who was not. One of our number, having had a few too many, insulted the 'lady' with some choice words. The management of the bar, in wrongly thinking we were British Squaddies, decided to call the British Military Police. When they arrived they started giving us all the usual bull*hit. The shortest member of our group walks up to the MP doing all of the talking and stabs him in the chest repeatedly with his index finger saying "listen mate, we are not military so you have no power over us. In fact, as a British taxpayer I think I pay your f*ing wages, so why dont you lot just f*ck off"
With this, the MP decides he is going to press charges on our friend for 'assault' and demands the civil police be brought in. Whilst waiting for the civil police, we decide to chance our arm and leave. Once on the street the MP's chased us and herded us into the nearest bus shelter. Local police duly arrived all tooled up en mass for a riot only to find 8 forlorn individuals sitting in a bus shelter surrounded by MP's. Local sergeant begins his investigation, and starts taking names. He told the MP's to move away while he spoke to us. Once out of earshot of the MP he tells us "Dont worry lads, these Military guys are all w*nkers. As soon as I get to the station this list of your names will go in the bin."
The whole scene then broke up, the MP's drove off in Land Rover, local police cleared off, and we weighed up our options. Final decision was to get in the nearest taxi back to the hotel. We were convinced that the dissatisfied MP's would be waiting 'around the corner' armed with batons etc.
The funniest thing about the night was the thoughts going through my mind whilst in the bus shelter waiting. I was convinced that at some point I would see the inside of a police cell and probably miss my first day at work. This would probably lead to being sent back to the UK. No real problem there with work, I would have so much street cred with my workmates and would go down in company folklore as some sort of super hero. But, how was I going to explain to my wife back home that I had been arrested outside the equivalent of a brothel?

Now the test for you guys..... who can fill in the x's and tell me the name of the city, the area and name of the bar?

[JetMender]

Is there a prize for getting this correct? Maybe a case of ******er Kindle?

[rightstuff]

Would it be The Irish Bar in the Europa Centre,Berlin?

[SchmiteGoBust]

A friend of mine (let's call him Bob to protect the innocent) recently told me of an experience he had whilst on detachment in parts German. A group of them all went to a strip club intending on some voyeuristic activity.
Anyway, one of the strippers kept winking at Bob during her act.
After she had left the stage she appeared in the audience and proceeded to proposition our Bob saying that she really fancied him and would he like to leave with her now for some nookie in her appartment round the corner.
Bob immediately realised he was in and left with her. She walked him round the corner into an alleyway, through a door to her appartment. Upon reaching the bedroom she told Bob she was a bit kinky and did he mind. Of course he said "not atall the kinkier the better"!! Within minutes she had him stark naked with a pair of roller skates on, sporting a bloody great storker.
Having engineered Bob into this state she went round the back of him and with great force propelled him forwards straight through a paper screen onto the very stage she had just left. Apparantly he glided across the stage with arms flailing wildly trying to keep his balance, stark bo**ock naked with a bloody great erection.
His mates were most amused, as was I ,when he told me about it!!!!

Absolutely true story this, honest....

[afkap Le Pen]

SGB you bugger...I hate it when the beer comes out of my nose!!! :)

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Blah Blah Blah Allowable: Blah Blah Blah MEL: Blah Blah Blah Pen it off!

[morroccomole]

Jetmender; no prizes for you I'm afraid.
Rightstuff; wrong I'm afraid.

[rightstuff]

If it's not the Irish Bar then it must be Mon Cherrie (excuse my french spelling) in the aforementioned German capital

[morroccomole]

Wrong rightstuff. Mon Cherie is the correct spelling of that particular club, but count the *'s in my post. 1 * for each letter, 2 words (9, 4) as they say in crosswords.

[Chad Helmuth]

it has been 7 years since my last bath !!!!

do they still do them, couldn't believe my eyes when I first got off at Grotty Chalotty and entered the place.

Chad

[rightstuff]

How about the Starlight Room although I thought it was Bar.
Happy days.

[4Rvibes]

I was working as a LAME based on a NS oil rig in 1992, the rig was owned by a large US company called Occ*******.
Coincidentally the chairman was touring the rig offering all and sundry his views.
Two scaffolders were up on the side of our hangar building (you guessed) scaffolding so the painters could get to business.
The, particially greasy and fat chairman, of the oil company shouted up to the scaffolders, "Hey guys, can I come up there to have a word".
To which #1 Scaffy replied,"Naw, **** off".
The chairman, dirsgruntled, replied "Do you know who I am?!"
To which Scaffy #1 turns to Scaffy #2 and says, "This fecker doesn't even know his own name and he wants up on our scaffold with out a certificate"
Exit fat yank............

[morroccomole]

OK rightstuff, you are just about right. I called it Starlight Club, many did call it starlight bar.

[rightstuff]

Morrocomole,are you with Spotty M or like me departed to pastures new?More clues please.

[morroccomole]

Rightstuff:
Once upon a time I was with Spotty M, but have been gone now for almost 3 years. I think you were MAN based but are probably with A2K now? or JMC?

[rightstuff]

Morrocomole,it's not A2K.